The Bridge

Wipqozn

5:00 PM

@Fluttershy I...what

Unionhawk

I mean, I did that all the time this summer kind of okay not really per se

As a divemaster, can I consider the reef to be my office?

John

@Unionhawk Do you conduct business there?

Fluttershy

@Wipqozn I work at a grain elevator that's about twenty feet from the river. The river is flooded. So my office is now an island in the river. I had to take a boat to get to it this morning.

Unionhawk

@John I mean I guess?

Frank

@Fluttershy At least it's an interesting start to the day.

Wipqozn

5:04 PM

@Fluttershy My word

Unionhawk

For definitions of business

John

@Fluttershy I can't decide whether I'm jealous or not.

Unionhawk

lol @ twitch is continuing to be fuct

Fluttershy

That's our driveway. :P It's under water.

John

@Fluttershy and you just...have a boat laying around for this kind of scenario?

Fluttershy

5:07 PM

@John Yep. Flooding tends to happen often here. In 2011, our office was destroyed in the flood. Our current building is brand new.

John

@Fluttershy ...and they rebuilt it twenty feet from the river?

Yuuki

@John For easy boat access.

John

Oh

Fluttershy

@John Only place they could rebuild it. That was a rare thing, the river getting high enough to ruin our office.

Unionhawk

Twitch has been fucking things up lately holy crap (all streams offline)

Fluttershy

5:09 PM

We're on a big hill, which should prevent flooding again. Hopefully. But we'll always have a boat.

John

@Unionhawk This saddens me considerably seeing as I was about to go watch a stream

Unionhawk

Yeah, no, Twitch is kill

John

@Fluttershy How big a hill?

@Unionhawk Oh wow, you are not kidding.

user15026

@Fluttershy Um.

MadMAxJr

Fluttershy is playing a VERY immersive version of Don't Starve.

Unionhawk

5:11 PM

We're looking into site loading issues. ^AC

Tweeted by TwitchSupport on March 18, 2015 at 5:10 PM

"Site loading issues" is putting it both mildly and incorrectly

I can load the website

user15026

@Fluttershy Oh goodness, that makes work interesting

murgatroid99

@Unionhawk maybe they count the streams as part of the site

Unionhawk

I just love that the frontpage is just an offline stream

Or a blackscreen sometimes

It seems fitting to the state of twitch this past week (they did a thing that apparently let other people into steamers' private messages and, more critically, their dashboards)

I don't even know how they managed that

MadMAxJr

That's kind of a big 'whoops'

Unionhawk

Yeah, right now it's site-wide issues on the ingest side of things

Fluttershy

5:20 PM

@AshleyNunn Yeah. It also sucks though. I can't leave early. :( I'm stuck here until the boat leaves.

Lazers

1

Q: Results of getting disconnected while attacking a village

When I go 'trophy farming' (attacking those village with Town Hall unguarded), I deploy around 3-5 archers to destroy the Town Hall. After some time I get disconnected while I'm still attacking. However, when I reconnect and see my Attack Log, it says that I got 1 star although I lost connectio...

clash-of-clans

0

Q: How can I amass lard quickly?

As the cornerstone of Muchi Muchi Pork's scoring system, the Lard Meter is extremely important, as it allows you to use your Lard Attack, which creates Medals that are collected for points. However, management of the lard meter is tricky, and it's extremely easy to find yourself out of lard at a ...

muchi-muchi-pork

1

Q: How do trade embargo wars work?

I'm playing as the Jimena dynasty (Tutorial scenario) and I'm approached by two separate Doges from Italy, asking me to join them in a trade embargo against the other Doge. I accepted the first time because they offered 150 gold. I assumed that a trade embargo would be mostly peaceful. Imagine m...

crusader-kings-2

user15026

@Fluttershy Boo :(

MadMAxJr

@Fluttershy Punch trees, craft boat?

Frank

@MadMAxJr Sadly, physics is a much harsher mistress in reality.

Yuuki

@Frank I dunno, Minecraft boats are pretty harsh in and of themselves.

MadMAxJr

5:24 PM

@Frank Next you're going to tell me that Shining Gundam won't appear for me when I snap my fingers dramatically.

Frank

@MadMAxJr Afraid not.

MadMAxJr

@Frank I am also sad they didn't do much for G-Gundam turning 20.

Frank

@MadMAxJr My actual Gundam watching is pretty tiny. There's very little I have seen.

Mostly just 00, and now the Build Fighters series.

MadMAxJr

@Frank G got me hooked because it is very serious about how not serious it is.

Also glorious scenes such as Gundams hugging conventional space rockets to get back into space.

And if you haven't seen "Detach the Manhattan combat zone and prepare to fire the Statue of Liberty cannon" well you should.

user15026

Woo, more jobs applied to. (Please someone hire me I am amazing.)

John

5:28 PM

Anyone here play Hearthstone?

@AshleyNunn I'd totally hire you if, yaknow, I was hiring for something.

user15026

@John And also weren't (likely) super far away from me :P

MadMAxJr

I'm afraid I'm only hiring combat class cyborgs right now.

Fluttershy

Neoseeker appears to be confusing DLC with microtransactions.

user15026

@MadMAxJr Damn it, and they forgot my arm cannon upgrade

John

@AshleyNunn I am indeed very super far away.

user15026

5:29 PM

@John That could be a problem

Yuuki

@AshleyNunn I'd hire you if I was in a position to make those decisions.

John

@AshleyNunn I seem to recall you having mailed cupcakes in the past, though

user15026

@Yuuki Now we just need to get you some awesome decision making powers and we will be all set

user15026

@John I have investigated mailing cupcakes! It's tricky because America is scared I will poison you allllll

MadMAxJr

One ring to interview them all, and in the office, hire them.

user15026

5:29 PM

(seriously, the rules are weird)

John

@AshleyNunn Suddenly a Honey Lemon-style purse comes to mind, except it fires cupcakes instead of those colored balls.

Wipqozn

@AshleyNunn Leaving you current job?

Fluttershy

@John I dabble in Hearthstone!

John

..My spell check is set to UK English.

Unionhawk

Twitch is coming back

John

5:31 PM

No wonder it underlined "colored"

Unionhawk

We have a pulse!

John

@Fluttershy Should I pick it up or not?

Unionhawk

Patient is still weak

borderless white text white shirt, good work person who made this

Fluttershy

@John It's free, so... No reason not to? I enjoy it! But I like card games.

John

@Fluttershy I've always felt some weird liking for card games, despite never really playing anything past Egyptian rat slap or balony

user15026

5:34 PM

@Wipqozn Not by choice. They ended our contract a month early, so my last day will be next Thursday (going to try really hard to go to work next week to get that last bit of money)

Wipqozn

@AshleyNunn Oh wow, that scusk

user15026

Oh yes. Finding that out a week after my surgery made me....a less than happy panda

John

@AshleyNunn It seems to me like you should get extra money for your contract ending early.

Lazers

0

Q: Minecraft PE v0.10.4 for iPhone not saving

My son's iPhone 4 will no longer save any changes he makes to worlds. He has all the updates and has even tried deleting the entire app and reinstalling it. There is plenty of storage space on the phone. The rest of the family have the same version, although on iPhone 5, and have had no problem...

technical-issues ios minecraft-pocket-edition

John

Pretty sure the point of a contract is so you can't just walk away

or fire someone

user15026

5:35 PM

@John I was hired through a staffing agency so they paid out the agency, and afaik I get nothing

Matt Giltaji

@John depends on the contract and the laws

Fluttershy

@John I'd say go for it, if you like card games. You can play without paying a dime, which is what I do, and I have fun enough with it.

MadMAxJr

Contracting in the US is a... unpleasant thing.

John

@AshleyNunn Well that's a bummer.

MadMAxJr

As a contractor, you're not an employee. And often, you'll be treated as a non-human.

John

5:36 PM

@Fluttershy :D

user15026

@MadMAxJr This is true here as well

user15026

I took it because I needed the money (and I really, really needed out of the bitcoin based hell that was my previous job) but dang, this sucks

MadMAxJr

You can't be privy to vital business operations. You're an expense, not a salary. They can pay more to a contractor than you could expect to make when hired. So often you will be told, 'If we extend you an offer it will be for a fair amount less than you are paid now."

Matt Giltaji

@AshleyNunn you were paid in bitcoin at your previous job?

user15026

@MattGiltaji They offered! I refused.

MadMAxJr

5:38 PM

Any job that involves the exchange of bitcoin or managing it is hell.

user15026

It was a bitcoin based sportsbook. It was pretty terrible.

Matt Giltaji

@MadMAxJr depends if you are working through an agency or not, often times the agency takes the vast majority of the higher rate

user15026

(Although I found out they are STILL getting DDOSed on the regular :P)

Unionhawk

heh

On that note, I'd actually be interested in seeing a TwitchCon panel on DDoS prevention, just, because

John

@Unionhawk I would be interested in this as well. Dota pros get DDoSed ALL the time

even tournament games

There was a game recently that took around 4 hours with 27(?) remakes

Rapitor

5:41 PM

@John aren't tournament games on a LAN?

John

because players kept dropping from repeated ddos

@Rapitor There is an option, but that prevents something to do with DotaTV

so no one ever uses that option

iirc TI is the one exception

because Valve

MadMAxJr

2020 - Valve buys EA. 2025 - Steam becomes self aware. 2026 - All of mankind is slave to steam sales.

Lazers

0

Q: F3 key is not working on Minecraft

Just yesterday, I bought a laptop and I set it up. Everything works and it's great, but, the F3 key isn't working on Minecraft. F3 will work normally (it brightens the screen) but just not in Minecraft. If you're wondering, I'm using a Windows 8 HP Pavilion laptop. Remember, I just got this lapto...

minecraft

0

Q: Destiny Chat Exit

I left the fireteam in Destiny in the tower but did not leave the chat, even when I switched to a different game! I felt dumb because I did not know how to exit the chat so I muted the mic but then was the subject of discussion. (awkward!) How did I leave the fireteam but not the chat? Was the...

ps4 destiny

MBraedley

@Lazers I could have sworn this was a dupe

Unionhawk

Pretty sure it is

Unless people closed it as off topic?

Wipqozn

5:57 PM

ib4 repost

Jason Berkan

@Wipqozn I think I liked the first one better.

murgatroid99

@JasonBerkan I agree

Wipqozn

Good, gooooood.

So we all agree that @OrigamiRobot is the traitor, and not me!

Rapitor

@JasonBerkan the visuals on 2 were gorgeous, but yeah. I did feel it was a bit... lackluster

still enjoyed it a ton

user15026

@Chippies so I was looking at that SanDisk MP3 player you linked me - noticed if I buy from Amazon.ca the price almost doubles. So...Amazon.com it is.

Chippies

6:05 PM

@AshleyNunn yeah, amazon.ca is bad with everything

user15026

@Chippies I was just like....uh...hell no. :P

Sterno

@Wipqozn It was over too soon.

user15026

Also, the 8 GB one isn't too much more :D

Rapitor

@AshleyNunn smile.amazon better

Sterno

And Lifehacks keeps deleting all its drama. I am drama-starved

user15026

6:05 PM

@Sterno That's sad.

Wipqozn

@Sterno Make a meta post about mod abuse.

user15026

@Rapitor I didn't know that was a thing

Powerlord

@Sterno Wait, they removed their meta site?

Rapitor

@Wipqozn better. a lifehack question on how to avoid mod abuse

GnomeSlice

I actually have a question to post on lifehacks later

Chippies

6:06 PM

@AshleyNunn the newer model is 39$ on newegg.ca

user15026

@Chippies You are awesome.

Chippies

I like the buttons on the old model though

GnomeSlice

How to avoid constantly getting static shocks while working with plastics every time I touch metal

user15026

Because yeah, the skip forward button on my iPod is totally borked.

Matt Giltaji

@Sterno all the fun comments were nuked on paranormal too :(

GnomeSlice

6:07 PM

processing stuff in a warehouse

Chippies

@AshleyNunn I usually check prices for things on shopbot.ca

user15026

@Chippies I also did not know -that- was a thing. :D

Chippies

@AshleyNunn wee, I knew a canadian thing that a real Canadian didn't! I'm so smart! :D

user15026

@Chippies grins Totally.

GnomeSlice

Lol @chippies are you illegal?

Rapitor

6:09 PM

@GnomeSlice connect yourself to a battery so the static electricity is stored :D

GnomeSlice

I thought you'd been here forever

Wipqozn

I'm so torn. I'm considering making yet another new city, sicne I think I fucked up highway placement again. I could also just bulldzoe some homes.

Or expand my city. I guess that would make sense.

GnomeSlice

@Rapitor would that actually work?

Chippies

@GnomeSlice I'm not illegal, but I am not allowed to be here permanently yet

user15026

@Chippies Waiting on permanent residence stuff?

Rapitor

6:10 PM

@GnomeSlice probably not, unless you can figure out a way to wire yourself to a battery.

Wipqozn

land bought

Unionhawk

@GnomeSlice no

Chippies

@AshleyNunn yep, still waiting

murgatroid99

@GnomeSlice ground yourself (use a conductive material to connect yourself to something metal or the ground wire in a plug)

Matt Giltaji

@Rapitor also to make sure that the battery does not transfer its charge into you

user15026

6:10 PM

@Chippies But you got stuff saying you could work here, no? Or am I remembering someone else?

Powerlord

This just in, @Wipqozn makes a terrible ~~mod~~ mayor.

Matt Giltaji

@Powerlord old news

Chippies

@AshleyNunn yeah, they give work permit to people being family sponsored now while the application is being processed

so I got that last month

user15026

@Chippies Oh, that's awesome

user15026

files that info away for later, because I am sure it will come in handy

Unionhawk

6:11 PM

I read that as lawyer. @Wipqozn would make a terrible lawyer too.

Chippies

@AshleyNunn I guess, doesn't really mean I can get a job :P

I mean, I could if I went to like, mcdonalds or something, but that's a very very last resort...

Wipqozn

I fail to see how bulldozing peoples homes for highways make me a terrible mayor. If those people didn't want to have their homes bulldozed, they shouldn't haved moved into a location I'd eventually decide to bulldoze!

Also I didn't actually bulldzoe

user15026

@Chippies yeah, but at least you have some sort of options, rather than no options, I guess?

Matt Giltaji

@Wipqozn you cut off water and power so they would leave voluntarily?

Wipqozn

I think I'm just going to cry, and restart

user15026

6:13 PM

I dunno, maybe I am just being too sunshine and unicorns today because it is nice outside and I had decent people to deal with at the bank earlier that didn't try to talk me into stupid things

Wipqozn

@MattGiltaji No,I bought new land

Chippies

@AshleyNunn yeah... Although it puts pressure on me, because I'm pretty sure it will look very bad for the immigration if I don't get a job soon

Wipqozn

but that's too expensive

Rapitor

@Wipqozn send in a deviljo... that'll clean everything up nicely... probably

Wipqozn

so I'm just going to abandon the city

Let the people fend for themselves

user15026

6:14 PM

@Chippies Yeah, that's unfortunate

Unionhawk

This is how I understand cities works: 1) try to build a city 2) realize that planning is hard 3) cry and reset

Chippies

@Unionhawk or 1) try to build a city 2) build it all wrong and realize everything is wrong 3) cry and never play again

Matt Giltaji

@Chippies missing step 2a) blame @Wipqozn

StrixVaria

It's too bad they can't just reset NYC and try again, hopefully with more entrances to the city by car this time.

Chippies

@MattGiltaji Didn't think I had to add that, considering how self-explanatory it is

Unionhawk

6:16 PM

1) try to build a city 2) get boned by traffic AI 3) try to be a highway engineer 4) post the monstrosity on the bridge

2

Matt Giltaji

@Chippies fair enough

Chippies

Some guy made a replica of Los Santos from GTA V in Cities, I downloaded it, enabled first person camera mod and pretended I'm playing GTA V and drove around the map.

doing so made me sad that GTA V is not released on PC yet

Unionhawk

5) realize you are not a highway engineer

Chippies

@Unionhawk 6) have #5 pointed out to you by everyone

Unionhawk

7) cry but keep playing

Chippies

6:23 PM

8) think you can improve with practice, when you really know you can't

Lazers

0

Q: What is this hole for in the controller?

So I was changing the trigger springs in my controller this evening and I noticed a small hole in the back of the controller, which I can only assume to be a reset perhaps? What is this hole actually for?

ps4

Matt Giltaji

9) look at the clock and realize that you spent far too long playing cities

Frank

10) Mod the game to ensure traffic is never a problem again

StrixVaria

@Lazers identify-this-hole

Unionhawk

@StrixVaria ew

Matt Giltaji

6:30 PM

@StrixVaria please flag as nsfw

StrixVaria

you guys are perverted

Chippies

@StrixVaria I'm not an expert, but I can take a look

Unionhawk

@Chippies ew

Frank

Bah.

Kabam clones a graphic novel, screws over creator

Sterno

It's probably dual-shock

Matt Giltaji

6:36 PM

@Frank creator needs to learn to SEO?

Frank

@MattGiltaji Could probably have helped, but it doesn't really absolve Kabam of any wrongdoing.

Yuuki

To be fair, the concept and name are pretty generic.

Frank

@Yuuki Granted. The two together, however, is a bit of a coincidence straining credulity.

Sterno

Not as generic as "Legend of Dungeons"

MBraedley

@Frank This guy seems pretty stand up. I think I'll support him by buying at least a couple of his comics on Comixology. If I like them, I'll buy more.

Sterno

6:38 PM

I STILL HATE THAT GAME NAME WITH THE FIRE OF ONE THOUSAND REALLY HOT THINGS

StrixVaria

I don't see "Creature Academy" on the play store.

Chippies

@Sterno Not as generic as "Dungeons"

Sterno

@Chippies That game was so boring, too

Yuuki

There's probably a game called "Game", huh.

Matt Giltaji

@StrixVaria i don't see it in ios app store either

Sterno

6:40 PM

> Dungeons differs from Dungeon Keeper in that the purpose is to ~~care for heroes and not monsters.~~ be really boring and unfun.

StrixVaria

@Sterno This reminds me that I bought Dungeon Keeper for like $1 a while back on GoG and never played it.

I wonder if I'll ever play it.

Unionhawk

It was free

Sterno

@StrixVaria You have a child. So probably not.

StrixVaria

I do have 5 weeks off work starting next week, but I just have to assume I'll have a giant badass city by the end of that.

Unionhawk

I've not played it.

Sterno

6:41 PM

Is she doing the thing yet where she gets on her hands and knees and rocks back and forth like she wants to crawl, but instead just gets incredibly made that she keeps flopping on her face?

StrixVaria

Or many, many tiny failed cities.

Frank

@StrixVaria Five weeks? Yikes.

StrixVaria

@Sterno She has smashed her face into the ground and started crying, but she only did that once.

Sterno

I didn't even have 5 weeks off of work after I saved the world from terrorists.

Matt Giltaji

@StrixVaria what job gives you 5 consecutive weeks off?

StrixVaria

6:42 PM

She gets on her hands and knees when you're trying to hold her while sitting on the couch, but not while she's on the floor.

Chippies

@MattGiltaji No job

StrixVaria

@MattGiltaji This is the second "half" of my paternity leave. My company allows you to not take it all at once, so long as it's all taken in the first year.

Sterno

@StrixVaria Learning to crawl is only fun if there's a 1 to 2 foot drop involved.

Matt Giltaji

@StrixVaria ah

StrixVaria

The first "half" was 7 weeks immediately after birth.

Wipqozn

6:42 PM

Picture of a buddies place from when he went to shovel out his car today.

Sterno

If that's 12 weeks paid time off, I need to go work for Google

@Wipqozn Move to the US #lifehack

MBraedley

@Wipqozn ... and he was never seen again

StrixVaria

@Sterno More if you're female.

Sterno

@StrixVaria so sexist

Matt Giltaji

@Sterno i think we all want to work for google

StrixVaria

6:44 PM

She should be crawling soon, though.

Her new favorite toy is a solo cup.

Sterno

You should give her the mouse and let her design your city's roads for you

Yuuki

@MattGiltaji I'd totally rather work for EA/Ubisoft.

user15026

Newegg chat support is awesome.

StrixVaria

@Sterno She likes to reach over and press the spacebar while I'm watching videos to pause them.

Sterno

@StrixVaria At about a year old, that was my daughter's favorite toy too, after seeing the Cups video on youtube

StrixVaria

6:45 PM

I don't blame her though; it is a mechanical keyboard.

user15026

We are trying to determine if I actually ordered a thing (because I screwed up the credit card verification crap but got a order notification) and he is being SO NICE

user15026

@StrixVaria My friend's almost one year old loves anything with buttons

Wipqozn

@Sterno The one with 2 girls?

2

user15026

Gave him my broken 3DS to play with and I have never seen a kid so delighted

Sterno

@Wipqozn No. No. No.

No

Matt Giltaji

6:46 PM

my favorite toy as a small child was measuring cups

Sterno

Anna Kendrick - Cups (Pitch Perfect's "When I'm Gone")

►

@Wipqozn No

Matt Giltaji

that and car keys

Wipqozn

I honestly don't even remember what happened in that video, but I know I don't want to.

user15026

@Wipqozn I do, and don't look it up

Unionhawk

No

Nonono

Matt Giltaji

6:46 PM

@Wipqozn you should only look it up if you are at a lemon party

Unionhawk

NO

Wipqozn

@MattGiltaji I'll keep that in mind

Sounds like @Unionhawk is a huge fan

Yuuki

@Sterno This is the prequel, right? One girl, one cup?

Unionhawk

...

Wipqozn

One @Unionhawk, two cups

Sterno

6:47 PM

I'm sending Chris Hansen to visit you all.

Yuuki

@Sterno My friend really liked that band.

StrixVaria

@Sterno Anyway, now that allusions to horribly nsfw internet memes are over, has your son begun with the crawling thing yet?

Matt Giltaji

@Yuuki dammit i was going to make that reference

Sterno

@StrixVaria Almost. He doesn't crawl yet but he scoots from the sitting position

StrixVaria

We have all hardwood floors, so I think her ability to move herself is going to be delayed from that.

Sterno

6:50 PM

It didn't seem to hinder my daughter much as long as you don't make her wear socks all the time

StrixVaria

We have an area rug but it's still not terribly soft.

Sterno

It's awesome watching them scoot backwards and in circles when they're trying to go forward

StrixVaria

She tries to scoot along the rug but usually ends up going the wrong way.

I almost expect her to learn that the best way to move (for now) is by rolling in the direction she wants to go.

user15026

This is proof that Target has NO IDEA what fat girls want to wear.

user15026

Those clothes are TERRIBLE

Rapitor

6:56 PM

at least they are doing plus size line?

MBraedley

@AshleyNunn What, you don't want to look like the one on the left?

Matt Giltaji

@AshleyNunn yeah, those stripes look terrible

and i can't even tell if it is white and gold or blue and black

Sterno

But they all look so happy!

user15026

@MattGiltaji Keep clicking, it gets worse

Sterno

Solution: Don't shop at Target

user15026

6:58 PM

@Rapitor As a plus size lady, if this is the shit they want me to wear....let's just say I am not sad they're not going to be in my country much longer

Sterno

user15026

@MBraedley The slideshow is just HORRIFYING

Matt Giltaji

@AshleyNunn gallery is not working for me

user15026

@MattGiltaji Oh god be glad, because it is SCARY

Matt Giltaji

shitty work internet strikes again

Transcript for