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1:04 PM
@Matt I'm on the edge of my seat. Now you really must finish.
Also, and I say this with a smile, you are one sick fuck.
 
:D yeah. I had to have a shower myself after that bit.
@KitFox Thanks! I'm going to try 4K words a day over the weekend. hopefully that'll put me back on track.
 
I did a kill scene last night. My husband interrupted me right at the end.
He walked in the bedroom and looked at me and said "Uh, are you OK?"
 
It's kinda disturbing, thinking those things.
 
It's more disturbing that it's arousing.
 
1:13 PM
But hey, that's human nature.
 
It's what we're trying to explore!
I put the thought that my mother will read this to the back of my mind...
 
Right. Mine won't, so I'm safe there.
And I'm sure my mother-in-law would respect my boundaries if I asked her not to read it.
 
My mum's been urging me to write a book for ages. I'm not sure she had this in mind.
 
I'm not sure what to do next in my story.
 
Kill some more.
 
1:16 PM
I'm not quite halfway through, but I kind of just did a big climax.
Well, the big kill is coming up, and this was supposed to set the stage for it.
Except I killed the guy who was going to do it.
 
Then you're doing it wrong.
 
don't the stories always do that? You've got this plan and BAM the characters all do something do scupper it
 
That only happens when you write in American English. Which is considered the lowest form of English anyway.
 
Bake, motherfucker, bake.
That still makes me chuckle.
Almost daily.
 
1:19 PM
We need a new pun. Same pun and no other pun makes pun a dull pun.
 
And I'm wasting my writing time in chat instead of writing this crap novel.
 
I did that yesterday
 
I caught up an entire day yesterday.
The most I've written to date.
 
I will give you over several dollars if you title your novel thus. Crap Novel.
 
1:20 PM
2500-odd words.
 
Expect to be sued by Tarantino, though.
 
I'm 2300 behind
 
I'm still a day behind, but now I'm all giddy at the thought that I might catch up.
The real problem is that the holidays are coming up.
So there is no way I can stay on pace unless I spend my vacation days writing.
And that means not mudding and taping.
 
in between childcare?
oh
 
And not earning extra monies from consulting.
And not making apple pie. Or pumpkin.
 
1:22 PM
teach your children to consult?
 
The horror.
@MattЭллен I wish. I keep thinking that maybe my oldest can learn to write some code...
 
no apple pie thanksgiving is a sin. it's been proven by science
 
But of course he can't even write yet.
 
Hello. Something is preferred over something else? OALD has no entry as to what preposition one must use there.
 
@Gigili Yes.
Hi!
 
1:23 PM
Thank you.
 
short but sweet
 
Are you talking about me?
 
yes! and Gigili's visit
 
Because I'm rather medium-sized and savory, actually.
 
oh, well, I can't be right all the time :Þ
 
1:25 PM
So are you Alex?
In your story, I mean.
 
me, no I think I'm Mr. Tibbles.
 
That suits you.
 
Jez
Mr. Flibble
 
@KitFox :D Who are you in yours? Any of them?
 
Did I ever tell you about the stupidest letter to Dan Savage that I ever read?
 
1:26 PM
no
 
Savages can't read anyway.
Don or Dan, doesn't matter.
 
@RegDwighт Since when has Windows solved anything?
 
@RegDwighт Was Fred Savage just repeating what he heard, in the Wonder Years?
 
This college girl wrote in to ask Dan if she should stay with her boyfriend who had raped her twice.
 
Well at least she didn't just go ahead and do it
 
1:28 PM
@MattЭллен I used Fred Savage in a radio spot once. True story.
 
@Robusto How did you use him?
 
As voice talent.
 
See, the first time, they went to a party together and got drunk and had sex, so that meant he raped her, and he agreed he wouldn't do it again.
 
@Robusto nice! What was he voicing?
 
What, he would only rape her sober?
 
1:29 PM
But then, like six months later, they were at a party and she got drunk and had sex with him again, so she thought he should go to counseling because he's a fucking rapist.
 
@MattЭллен Commercial for an airline. He was a kid, so he was the kid who was afraid he would not be able to go to Florida this winter.
 
@KitFox I see...
Did counselling help?
 
(Because she couldn't consent to sex because she was drunk, despite the fact that they had sex regularly otherwise.)
Dan told her to stop being a nutcase. And he advised the boyfriend to run far, far away if he was reading the column.
 
@Robusto exactly. QED.
 
1:35 PM
I'm off. Later.
 
Really, people still hack at speech recognition? I don't get it. It cannot be done. Now go waste your money on world peace or prolonging erections.
 
@KitFox CU
@KitFox thanks for the encouragement
 
@RegDwighт How about money spent on world erections?
 
That's a huge bingo. Is that how you say it? No matter, it's a huge bingo!
 
1:42 PM
@RegDwighт It is gigantic. And hard. And throbbing. By every measure, that's a bingo.
 
> If you’re so meteorologically challenged that, upon hearing the unmistakable crack of a storm while staring out a rain-soaked window, you still need to coquettishly inquire, “Is that rain?” then Siri is totally for you.
Hahaha.
What a dumb commercial.
 
I know, that is priceless.
 
Not to mention the Crystal Pepsi one.
 
People are starting to bitch about missing tag wikis. But do they edit them? No.
 
Actually I edit a lot and do not bitch. About wikis, that is.
 
1:44 PM
More name-dropping: I used Caleb Deschanel for a TV campaign for beer, and he brought his daughter to the location we were using. Her name? Zooey.
 
I had to work on that, what's it's called, Cartologist badge or something.
 
I wasn’t talking about you. I was talking about people. You, sir, are clearly a mole.
 
At least I am not Sarah Jessica Parker's face mole.
 
But just think of the places you’d go and the people you’d see!
 
Jul 6 at 14:52, by Robusto
We are not neighbors. You are in my back yard.
 
1:46 PM
@Robusto I watched Almost Famous the other week and almost didn't recognize her until she put on tons of makeup.
 
That would be a mole.
 
@Robusto And they say bunny and foxy can’t be friends.
 
But Frog and Toad can be, and are.
 
Frog and Toad are kissing cousins.
 
so are Toad, Badger, Ratty and Mole
 
1:48 PM
QED
 
> Siri Thinks Hurricane Sandy Is in First Place in the NHL's Southeast Division
LOLWUT
Go Sandy, go!
 
@MattЭллен Ah, yes ... The Wimps in the Pillows.
 
I know I had it read to me a million times. I'm not sure i've read it myself.
 
@MattЭллен You should get Siri to read it to you. Hilarity would no doubt ensue.
 
1:50 PM
OK. The Horny Back Toad is friends with Elton John. By Adolf Nobel.
 
Horny toads ain’t kissing cousins with frogs so much as they are with geckos.
 
Ah, but you're forgetting the back part.
 
I thought it imprudent to mention his orientation.
And you will note who was just called a gecko.
 
I only know Jacko.
And Jackie O.
 
1:54 PM
Mushroom! Mushroom!
 
Goal! It's a goal!
 
No, stool. It’s a toadstool. Or a cucking-stool.
 
@tchrist But a normal RA gets paid in more than badges. Not a lot more, but more.
 
I was an RA as an undergrad. I had to pay for the privilege. Badges are a step up for me
Although I probably learned a lot more than I would from editing tag wikis
 
@MattЭллен No bennies at all? That sucks.
 
2:08 PM
@Robusto aye. it was a voluntary position, and I had to pay tuition fees for the year (despite it being a year in industry, and I wasn't being tutored)
 
> Siri is a “curated” experience—it draws its answers from specific sources that Apple has signed deals with. For instance, if you ask Siri about Barack Obama’s age, she’ll give you an answer from Wolfram Alpha.
 
RAs are usually grad students, or sometimes postdocs. Depends.
 
Who didn't see that coming?
 
RAs are paid next to nothing. Even postdocs, kids with newly minted PhDs, are barely remunerated. I heard like $40k. Hope they aren’t married with kids yet.
 
@tchrist That's the whole deal for grad school, at least in the sciences. You become an RA, get free tuition and a small stipend, while you work on your doctorate (or post-doc, as you say).
 
2:12 PM
We had TAs, RAs, and PAs if you were in grad school, where it was indeed tuition and bus-money. Postdoc RAs get a teensy bit more. The predocs are superlow.
But if you could swing a halftime appointment, you got benefits.
I’m not sure if that’s an appropriate sense of halftime.
Sounds like recess appointments.
But if you were booked for the full year instead of for two semesters, even at half-time you got benefits.
Fix by nuculation:
-1
Q: divide this passage into paragraphs

Hannah Harvey - Ewusithe childhood years are supposed to be the best times of one's life, playing and having fun. yet there are many children who are deprived of this childhood. they are tortured and physically and verbally abused. there is no reason or excuse for child abuse. abusers claim they do it because of stre...

What a FW!
 
@tchrist I'm tempted to comment, "Who was your copy-edit monkey last year?"
 
Needs a smack down.
And his Shift key is broken.
I regret that it takes so long to delete.
But I’m doing my best. :)
Only problem is that a too-quick deletion might fail to get the message across to him.
 
Exactly.
 
Maybe we could go for the down-vote record on this one?
 
Jez
i really hate it when you get a social situation sprung on you and you're not prepared
 
2:24 PM
At −5 it's off the radar.
So it's unlikely to get to −15.
 
Jez
some nice girl says "hi" and you're taken by surprise so you just say "hi" back and nothing else, sounds like you dont wanna talk to them or something. argh.
i need a more.... engaging "shoot-from-the-hip" response to people
 
0
Q: Better word for choices/options

user30944I provide some services on my website, and users can opt for one or more services, as per their wish. I am looking for a term that describes the selection of choice(s)'user made. Are there some alternatives to words like choices, options Choices, Options, Alternatives, Blend, Package, Option, ...

 
@Jez so... not screaming and running away?
then I can't help you
 
I see no relevance between my question and the duplicate you mentioned @Robusto.
 
Jez
if you said "hi" to me politely, though, and i just quickly said "hi" back and nothing else, you'd read that as "piss off, with all due respect", wouldnt you?
 
2:30 PM
@Gigili Nap is an noun in one sentence and a verb in the other. Architect is a verb in one sentence and a noun in the other.
@Jez depends on the tone of voice. maybe.
 
That was a triple ping!
@MattЭллен Right, and?
 
Sorry!
 
Jez
@MattЭллен i guess i should be glad i got past just grunting
although barely
 
@Jez heh, that would have been off putting.
 
Sack. Nap sack. Knapsack. Snapsack. It’s napsacked.
 
2:33 PM
@MattЭллен Not a problem.
So there is no rule whether to use the noun or the verb?
 
other than the normal grammatical rules? I don't think so. I haven't voted either way on your question.
 
OK, I deleted my question since I got the correct answer. Thank you for your help @Matt.
 
No need to delete, @Gigili - there might be a better answer. You're welcome, of course :)
 
2:48 PM
@Gigili Link question? Oh, the nap question. I thought you were asking about verbing nouns (napping) vs. using the noun form (take a nap).
 
is that the larval stage of a narwhal?
 
Manatees (family Trichechidae, genus Trichechus) are large, fully aquatic, mostly herbivorous marine mammals sometimes known as sea cows. There are three accepted living species of Trichechidae, representing three of the four living species in the order Sirenia: the Amazonian manatee (Trichechus inunguis), the West Indian manatee (Trichechus manatus), and the West African manatee (Trichechus senegalensis). They measure up to long, weigh as much as , and have paddle-like flippers. The name manatí comes from the Taíno, a pre-Columbian people of the Caribbean, meaning "breast". Taxonomy M...
 
> They measure up to long, weigh as much as
lol
 
yeah the inlining feature could stand to be a better wikipedia parser
 
the wiki import script is chortlesome
 
3:13 PM
Obligatory:
 
Awwwww!
 
This animal is on my list for MOCs.
 
TLA check, bitte.
 
Tour de las Américas?
Or the Truppenluftabwehr?
 
Manatee Of Chats?
 
3:16 PM
Ministry of Cuteness.
 
Master Of Ceremonies?
 
Nov 7 at 14:13, by Mr. Shiny and New 安宇
@KitFox MOC = "my own creation". LDD is a lego cad tool
 
I've been making animals all week.
Two weeks, actually.
But it's only for three days that I've been up to full speed, with an animal a day.
 
3:19 PM
Ever since you mentioned putting all your lego on two billys, I've had a bee in my bonnet to do the same.
 
Given that we have antilocaprine critters and ovibovine critters, why aren’t the manatoids called maribovines or aquabovines or haliabovines?
 
Waiting for good weather to make photos. It's so dark and gloomy, and the electric lights are too yellowish, and flash is awful.
 
I am considering fast-tracking some renovation plans for the house in order to more quickly accomplish that goal
 
A noble pursuit if there has ever been one.
 
Use bounce flash, and if you use incandescent lighting normally, you need to use a #85B color filter on the flash to remap the daylight-balanced color temperature of the flash to match the lower color temperature of your incandescents. Then you use an explicit color temperature of incandescent, or ~2800–3200K. Otherwise you need auto white balance, but the flash will have to completely overcome the neighboring incandescents, and you may never get it right.
 
3:24 PM
0
A: Plural Possessive of a Singular Noun

Amelia KiperHow in the freaking world is this stuff supposed to help some one, this crap isn't answers!

 
keel eet
@RegDwighт inverts you
 
No, you're an invert.
 
Or untenses, since "... if ever there was one" is more common.
@RegDwighт recluse ≠ invert
 
A noble pursuit, if been one there ever has
 
I'm not taking advice on simple past vs. present perfect from an American.
 
3:26 PM
lol
 
Who are considered the lowest speakers of English anyway
 
How do you feel about Hamas?
 
it's a statement of fact, that that's the opinion of someone
 
@tchrist On Tuesdays? Or in general?
I take the silence as a both.
Hamas are enthusiastic acronyms. That's all I know.
 
> Yo contradigo como jamás se ha contradicho, y, sin embargo, soy lo contrario de un espíritu que dice no. .. Sin embargo, jamás ha habido condena en costas y no se ha procedido a la oportuna liquidación y exacción pese a que, después de la última reforma citada, .. Jamás ha habido un niño tan adorable que su mamá no quisiera verlo dormido ... Y sin embargo, jamás ha habido un momento en el que la concentración de poder ..se haya aceptado con menos preguntas ...
It is not just English wherein ever/never likes to go first.
"If ever there was" is better than "if there ever has been", which doesn’t ring quite right to me. @MattЭллен?
 
3:31 PM
Yeah spear me the gawry deetiles. I've read hundreds of John Lawler's answers on the subject. I've read them all.
Man up and move on.
 
@tchrist I agree that was is more common than has been in that idiom.
 
So how is that going to change if you're doing nothing?
Go use your simple past. Go vote Obama. Be like that.
 
remaining the same was what we were all about.
don't remind me about voting
 
Everybody untense. back rubs
 
there's a vote for the new police commissioner today
what a waste of time.
 
3:34 PM
 
what good will a police commissioner be?
same as it ever was
 
@tchrist again, you're wasting your time. I'm running the exact same searches in COCA and BNC right now.
 
BNC

if there has ever been one 0
if there ever has been one 0
if there ever was one 5

COCA

if there has ever been one 0
if there ever has been one 0
if there ever was one 83
 
No, the idiom is "if ever there", not "if there ever". It means something different, kinda.
Ever wants to go first.
 
3:37 PM
I only just started. Will you let me.
 
Proceed.
 
There are like over 9000 combinations or something.
Like 5!^6*7
My math is shaky, but that sounds about wright.
 
macbook# echo if ever there has been | permute | wc -l
     120
 
See, I told you.
6!
 
I love it when you talk sixy.
 
3:38 PM
I don't need a macbook echo. I can echo myself.
 
That doesn't factorial into the conversation at all.
 
And who the factorial are you?
 
awaits the echo
 
Oct 17 at 21:12, by MετάEd
Echo?
 
People in the workers' paradise should know all about factorials.
Or perhaps I should say "workers' parodies"?
 
3:39 PM
Work-ass parodies.
 
Workers care more about matters sartorial than they do matters factorial.
 
You've a certain sartorial eloquence
And a style that's almost of your own
You've got the knack of being so laid-back
It's like talking to the great Unknown
 
I should have run for police commissioner. I can write better than all these hacks.
 
But can you also commission better?
 
probably
it can't be hard if they're letting politicians do it
> Former Chairman of Eton Wick Hellenic League Football Club.
> Member of Rotary for 22 years serving the local community.
really? That's important how?
 
3:41 PM
@MattЭллен What, so you could be Batman's stooge?
 
goddamn idiots
 
@MattЭллен organize a write-in campaign
 
@Robusto why should Robin and Albert have all the fun?
 
Well, 22 is more than 7, say. I would say that's a fact not to be entirely overlooked.
 
@MattЭллен Because they get to go into the Bat Cave. The commish doesn't. QED.
 
3:43 PM
@Robusto damnit! then I'll run for Batman's Butler.
@RegDwighт it's not over 9000.
 
A much better job. We could do a Masterpiece series: Batman Abbey!
 
macbook# perl -le 'print 120 ** 6*7' | commify_numbers
20,901,888,000,000
 
@MattЭллен I'll run away from him. He was scary in Cider House rulez.
 
@RegDwighт Ether he was or he wasn't.
 
Not an unnice litotes.
 
3:45 PM
Eunice Litotes. Man, what mammaries.
 
You've got a self-sufficient swept-back hairdo
Pretty certain that you've got it made
Oh your life-style shows in the clothes you chose
Sitting pretty in the masquerade
 
"Chrism" is one of my favorite words.
 
What is the grammar of "Sitting pretty in the masquerade"?
should it not be "A pretty seat of the masquerade"?
 
COCA

if there has ever been one 0
if there ever has been one 0
if there ever was one 83
if ever there was one 104
if ever there has been one 0
beer 19929

BNC

if there has ever been one 0
if there ever has been one 0
if there ever was one 5
if ever there was one 44
if ever there has been one 0
porridge 276
See, @tchrist, in the US it's actually pretty much a tie.
 
3:49 PM
At @MετάEd's famous baptism
They offered a new kind of chrism
They all went to work
Like a circular jerk
And baptized the lad with their jizm!
@MετάEd Just for you ^
 
@Robusto That, uh, wasn't really necessary to post here.
 
I thought you liked chrism. My bad.
 
@Robusto His garments were parted, and lots cast upon his inward coat..but they pierced his side with a spear, looking upon him him whom they had pierced; according to the prophecies of him, which were so clear and descended to minutes and circumstances of his passion, that there was nothing left by which they could doubt whether this were he or no who was to come into the world.
 
think of the children!
 
No.
 
3:50 PM
Here's your jizm. I mean jizz. I mean jinx. I mean coke. I mean Fanta.
3
 
@MattЭллен If he's writing poems like that I hope he's not thinking of children.
 
@Robusto I love it.
 
Don't ever say I never gave ya nothin'.
 
@RegDwighт You outing me as an English mole just outs yourself as a Canadian one.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 And Kit think I'm the sick one! ;)
 
3:52 PM
@tchrist I thought that was clear the moment I mentioned ELM.
 
@Robusto At least that one gets the act right, which the ELU question about it does not.
 
@RegDwighт Why does he have tits?
 
Which, obviously, was to distract from the fact that I use MAPLE.
@tchrist oh yeah like you're telling me you wouldn't have tits if you could.
 
@MετάEd What more would you have of me than that?
 
3:54 PM
@tchrist Non sequitur?
 
@RegDwighт Any man can have tits, provided he can pay for them.
@MετάEd Thomas sum.
 
@tchrist so you answered your own question.
QED or whatevah.
 
@RegDwighт Normally they are simply rented for the eve.
 
@tchrist You can't have read that already.
 
QEDOW could almost be a batman sound effect
 
3:56 PM
@MετάEd Huh? Surely you jest! I don’t need to move my lips, you know.
 
Why is it that every time I want to type an apostrophe I end up hitting Enter and posting my line instead?
 
Jewish fanfic. There is nothing new under the sun.
 
@RegDwighт your wrist spiders are turning against you
 
In case you didn't notice, the "oh yeah like you're telling me" line got cut off at "oh yeah like you" at first. For a second I wanted to leave it like that.
 
@RegDwighт Must be nice. Mine»re all turned into chevra.
 
3:58 PM
Un oiseau, un enfant, une chèvre.
 
@RegDwighт No Like buttons in this chat.
 
@tchrist OMG you're right! Well in that light I see I should get started on Jesus/Judas.
Not that it hasn't already been done.
 
Capering antilocaprids.
 

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