@RyJones Oh wow

People buy houses for that?

@MarkHenderson a house with a basement pre-modified into a torture chamber (literally)? yes, yes they do

his basement is a literal prison, very stoutly built. quite impressive.

@RyJones Right - not the whole house

Who wouldn't want a sex dungeon basement?

I don't know why but I jus timagined cocks on the wall when you walk into the foyer

@freiheit prudes? I don't know

@freiheit Just lock the door so the kids don't get down there

@MarkHenderson throughout the house there are those loops for tying people up mounted really well to the walls and ceilings

@freiheit that's hard work!

plus other modifications

@RyJones So when the pastor comes to visit, does he ask what they're for?

@RyJones They're in denial

Or is he a regular guest?

@MarkHenderson he probably... yes, as you put it

the dining room table is very stoutly built.

So my Dad is a pastor and now I feel unwell

All those evenings when he said he was going to womens fellowship meetings after dinner, he was really being tied up and had hot wax on his balls

@MarkHenderson possibly. He live within an hour or so of Indianapolis?

@RyJones Ahh no

I feel like this week I've gotten to know you all a lot better

@MarkHenderson love you too, man

I should hang out with large hairy men with beards more often. My vagina might disappear

Hey @cole that could be cheaper than surgery!

Oh. My.

@MarkHenderson You should let your beard grow in and find a pocket knife you like, too.

theatlantic.com/technology/archive/2014/02/…

everyday-carry.com

@MarkHenderson PaaS?

Also, it takes a lot to really get me angry. It happened today, and I almost punched a coworker in the face.

@cole Why so angry

@JoelESalas his tertosteroil is getting low

@RyJones Hahahahha

@freiheit I have two vitorinox knives, a big one in the car and a small one on the keyring

Ok so here's the quick summary

shit, I didn't know that was actually about a sex change: theinfosphere.org/Testosteroil

our site out in CO let their SSL certs expire. Security guy bought a wildcard cert - was like "omg wtf how do u?" so I got that straightened away and showed him how. Now, the cert also had to be added to the NetScaler - which, one of the other guys in my group has done...many times, seeing as we've had it for at least 6+ years.

So security guy asks him, he shrugs and says "dunno" - so I'm like fine I'll help. So I'm looking at the NetScaler and said coworker and another coworker are hanging over my shoulder. I finally figure it out from some online documentation - and the second coworker was like "yeah well now you need to document this." I said "It should have been documented in the first place and we wouldn't be in this mess." He's like "well do it"

First of all, I was going to document it. I finally snapped and was like "Look, I've been here a year and this has been here WELL before me. I document everything I do - so lay off." and he still just starts talking over me "well you better document it tomorrow"

This is coming from the guy who doesn't document anything

what did your manager say?

He was gone

that's the first person I'd discuss it with

I'm so pissed right now.

drink a lot of alcohol. Nothing bad comes from too much alcohol

@RyJones already started.

Oh this is high class: komonews.com/news/problemsolvers/…

@RyJones well that's really fucking shitty.

I hate people.

think happy thoughts. put on season 5 of breaking bad

Hello Edmund,
I found your resume online and thought that you might be interested in the new fulltime opening below – please review and let me know your thoughts! Thank you for your time.

Fulltime - DevOps

SKILLS
·         Linux administration (preferably Ubuntu)
Amazon Web Services
Nginx
MongoDB
PostgreSQL
RabbitMQ
Automation (Ansible, Chef, Puppet, or other is a plus)
Basic understanding of LDAP
Knowledge of other programming languages (e.g.,  Java, .NET, Python)
Knowledge of Solaris

RESPONSIBILITIES
Work with development and operations teams and thrive in a DevOps environment
Participate in the design, implementation, and maintenance of the Ruby and Rails applications that make up our products.
Work with the development, QA, and Operations teams to automate manual steps in development and deployment processes
Work with the development, QA, and Operations team to ensure adequate level of health monitoring for all production systems, including hardware, server components and deployed applications

@ewwhite AWS? No thanks

Ubuntu, no thanks.

SOLARIS, no thanks

@ewwhite Might get within 1000 yards of Java, no thanks

this was in reference to the Atlantic link earlier.

I get these emails every day

@ewwhite don't blame you there

@ewwhite I don't get them quite every day, but close to it

Check out this website! thefifty50.com

@ewwhite Is there a website hiding somewhere behind that flash app?

@ewwhite 100% flash site! That's great for accessibilty

the menu is a jpeg-encrusted PDF...

@ewwhite shudder

@freiheit Are you kidding? Supporting Java is amazing

Someone told them to put their menu into PDF and that's what happened

it's horrid

Oh, and don't try to click to go mobile.

@JoelESalas Amazingly painful?

@ewwhite 18% I hate tips

I hate tipping

Just pay your employees a proper rate ffs

@MarkHenderson but: America

@ewwhite Also whats with advertising things without sales tax in the price?

Here you have to advertise everything with tax by default; if it's without tax it needs to be clearly labelled as such

@MarkHenderson America's restaurant employment is broken, it's true. If you visit, please go along with it, and be generous.

Waitresses Stuck at $2.13 Hourly Minimum for 22 Years

@freiheit Of course - when in rome

Do you tip at places like mcdonalds?

Or the drive through?

no

only when served

@MarkHenderson Tipping is required when it's a place where the server comes to your table to take your order and brings the food to you at your table. If I get takeout from a place like that, I'll still tip, but a lot less, because the person helping is basically making nothing if you don't tip and handling a togo order is still work. If you order at a counter, tipping is not really expected.

Good to know

I have a fund for my great american road trip, so I have every intention of coming

But only when the kids are old enough to remember and appreciate it

@MarkHenderson oooh, come visit!

So it'll be about 5 years time at the earliest

no drop-bears here...

We'll just need to decide which Disneyland to go to

California

Ha. Plane tickets to the US from Australia cost more than that waitress's annual salary!

@ewwhite And most of our deadly snakes are noisy, too!

@MichaelHampton Wow... they get paid that little?

@MarkHenderson thus the need for tips.

@MarkHenderson No, plane tickets are insanely expensive to Australia. Unless you buy them at ... booking.com!

@MichaelHampton shit, I was looking for a round trip to Australia to visit me mates and it was hella spendy

@MarkHenderson Wages as low as $2.13 an hour (though in some states/areas it's actual real minimum wage of $8 to $10 an hour), plus maybe 10% of the price of the food they serve to you.

Maybe I'll try Australia and NZ this year

@ewwhite I havent been to NZ but if you're into adventure things it's the place to go apparently

Sky diving, hang gliding, jumping into volcanos, etc

@MarkHenderson I'm into opening beer and watching girls bounce around on the beach

@RyJones Australia

Queensland to be specific

@MarkHenderson yeah, that's where the clan I game with is based

If Las Vegas is your idea of a good time, then Gold Coast. If you're more of a Hamptons person then go to Noosa (sunshine coast)

The whole 40+ degrees thing really burns me up.

@MichaelHampton Thats why you go to the beach

@MarkHenderson Is it cooler at the beach?

@MichaelHampton Yes

Sea breeze

Also, water

@MarkHenderson Makes sense.

Unless it's a westerly in which case you're fucked

It will be hot everywhere

I saw Australia was burning down a bit ago

40 at a beach is fairly unusual, you gotta be about 10k's inland to get those temps

Kangaroos bursting into flames and whatnot

@RyJones Remember your Californian bushfires a few years ago?

We have them basically every year

@MichaelHampton PPRO wants me to enable their Yum repo... on my servers.

@MarkHenderson yeah, I know, the Australians I game with talk about it every year. Bad times.

@ewwhite Oh, nice. They're actually doing something right!

@RyJones The major cities are typically safe enough, but this year they got pretty close

It's the rural areas that suffer the most

@MichaelHampton they're asking me if it'll break the shellinabox solution

@ewwhite ROFL!

I should know yum better... but is there a yum noop or dry-run?

Um, isn't PPRO the one to ask if PPRO's yum repo will break PPRO's shellinabox?

@ewwhite --downloadonly is what I use. Requires the yum-plugin-downloadonly package.

well, yes, there's also yumdownloader

@MichaelHampton c'mon

@MarkHenderson California has bush and forest fires every year, basically. iscaliforniaonfire.com cdfdata.fire.ca.gov/incidents/incidents_current

@ewwhite Just answer "no" when it asks?

I ran the update.... let's see what fucked up

Works! ppro.familytreeproduce.com/webclient

@ewwhite What is the definition of "works"?