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13:07
argh..I hate stupid people!
I just heard this one..."There are no stupid questions...
...only stupid people"
I could list all the questions on the front page of ELU as examples of both.
Is it just me or is their example... um... one they shouldn't be using as an example?
Also, "it's".
@KitFox I thought they were designed to do that, or at least it was a desirable outcome ('corrective contact lenses').
Maybe. I don't know.
@RegDwighт oh...you mean they're supposed to be ... similar? to the first one?
I'm trying to figure out what the point of the software is.
To match you with porn stars that look like the women you want to have sex with.
13:12
I mean really?..."Let's make a website that matches your GF to who you want her to be. Dudes will love it!"
So you know what porn to shop.
There's gotta be something more to it than that.
Maybe. I think it would be useful to be able to find porn with people who look like people I want to have sex with.
Like collecting faces for some algorithm that will create fembots in a secret underground lair.
@KitFox It seems so ... blah. "Hey I have a face matching algorithm...hmm...how can I parlay that into 100's of dollars? You know for pizza money." The fart app was a much more lucrative cost-benefit situation.
@Mitch you miss the point. Going by the image above they do not have a face matching algorithm. Only some dice.
13:17
It's just a way to get people to use their escort service. I assume that's what Naughty America is. Or a hook up site
Porn downloading.
@MattЭллен yeah yeah nice try as if you don't know what Naughty America is wink wink nudge nudge.
And perhaps a fleshlight interface.
apparently I don't
13:18
@KitFox not just downloading. For decades physical DVDs of theirs could be obtained in any sex shop in Europe.
What am I saying, sex shop. In any video rental.
sighs
Of all people, @Reg, I thought you knew me better than that.
@KitFox I do. I know that you haven't been to Europe for decades.
@RegDwighт OK....now makes sense.
Except I misspole above as about.
You are very generous.
I like dice. they're good for making decisions
13:20
Diceisions.
There are not enough dice.
just roll a dice to choose the one you want to use
You know, use them once, shame on you. USe them twice shame on me.
@MattЭллен like universal hashing!
just say 'Yes!' !
I know that episode!
roll the bones.
I watched it just yesterday. It was epic.
I take it that's Community?
Yep.
Episode 4 of whatever season.
Chaos Theory.
"Remedial Chaos Theory" is the third (aired as fourth) episode of the third season of the U.S. television series Community. It originally aired on October 13, 2011 on NBC. The episode features a housewarming party for Troy and Abed panning out in seven alternate timelines. Each timeline explored the effect of the absence/presence of a character on other characters in similar situations. The episode was written by Chris McKenna and directed by Jeff Melman. It received highly positive reviews, with many critics lauding its unconventional structure and noting a significant improvement from ...
13:27
imagine if all 4th episodes of all seasons of all tv shows became that episode of Community. So many continuity problems!
Nah, not significantly many more than there are anyway.
In all TV shows, that is.
Holy oh sheep dip.
It calls to you through th ether?
I just printed (how quaint) my sproc script. It's 150-odd pages.
13:31
Oops.
makes for a good back up
Well, I suppose I could bind it.
I just wanted to be able to spread it out and look at it.
I've printed some manuals of roughly that many pages, but it used up most of the ink so that most of the pages were marked but totally unreadable.
I cry for the trees I killed.
Well, I thank you, given how important the paper industry is to my local economy.
So I'm thinking that probably I ought to break up this script into sensible pieces. That's what I've learned already.
Yay me.
13:34
Also, I'd like to point out my humorous edit on a recent Meta question that you may have already seen.
Yeah, encourage is a hilarious word.
sighs y u trollin me bro?
Cuz im frum SO yo.
oic
I can has le English? plz pm teh words
13:36
u halps me whut iz rite?
@Matt
which one
@matt
@MattЭллен
0
Q: Word for user/reader/etc

KianIs there a general word to describe the following words: User/End User Reader Audience Operator If not, someone should definitely make one up

head asploded
Is he looking for "dumb"?
You should post that as an answer.
Fuck. I can't get out of my own way today.
Santorum in the Back of the Pack
13:38
hee hee hee
Happy Dad's Day, @MετάEd. Did you have a pleasant one?
@KitFox Yes thanks. (Oh, I guess I can take off my tie now!)
Did you get a tie?
tie forever! Cool neck, never!
13:39
I'll give you a tie. A Colombian necktie.
is it special?
It's for your neck.
It's also Colombian.
You'll be well ventilated.
That's two specials for the price of none.
@KitFox Socks.
13:41
!!/define "colombian necktie"
I think it's for the price of exsanguination
@KitFox My pocket dictionary just isn't good enough for you.
!!/urban "colombian necktie"
@KitFox mad a multi-functional word: very/a lot/hard/etc. Accentuates any verb.
Riiight.
Thanks, honey.
13:42
that's... different
Feb 14 '12 at 20:24, by RegDwight Ѭſ道
You guys are hilarious or something.
@RegDwighт My money's on the "or something"!
Don't tell the NSA where your money is!
!!/mental ... jinx
@Mitch That didn't make much sense. Use the help command to learn more.
13:43
@RegDwighт They already know!
@RegDwighт Don't need to. They already know.
!!/duh
Jinx
@Robusto exactly my point.
@KitFox precisely my point.
!!/jinx
13:44
Self-jinx.
What the NSA doesn't know is where I buried Jimmy Hoffa's body.
There.
Found it.
That was easy.
The body?
@Robusto They just trolled you to confess.
13:44
@RegDwighт Yeah.
@Robusto what you do not know is that nobody cares about Jimmy Hoffa's body, not even the NSA.
@RegDwighт The tabloids care.
They are not called -oids for no reason.
Just out of curiosity, did you know who Jimmy Hoffa was before googling it?
I still do not know who he is because I haven't googled and am not planning on.
As I said, nobody cares. That includes me.
13:46
Every time you mention the NSA, an angel comes to your house at 3 in the morning, breaks down the door and whisks you away, never to be heard from again.
That's nice. Because I do not want to hear back from angels.
@Mitch how do they hear you after the first time?
@RegDwighт counter example: Altoids. um.. no you're right, nobody cars.
@MattЭллен no need. They removed your ears. Painlessly...they're not monsters you know.
so that's how they get you. listening with your own ears!
@Mitch No, not angel. You mean an early European migrant to Britain.
13:48
@Mitch Well, then there's factoids... oh. Oh. That's awkward.
Ears for fears.
@Robusto pict? celt? pole?
@RegDwighт Everybody wants to rue the word. (Which is my way of saying Merry Christmas: No L.)
2
A ruer word never spoken.
@Robusto saxon? jute? ... (I'm getting closer)
13:49
No no, not an Angle. You're thinking of what stars on the USA flag do
anglo?
@MattЭллен They just...sit there.
@Mitch Did you try Frisian?
Samuel stole the L.
@Mitch dump the jute on the burning ground.
From Ange? Oh NOo!
No, not spangle. You're thinking of that band from the 80s.
13:50
Hey man, what's that you're carrying?
Feels like lead
It weighs a ton, let's see if we can dump it by the side of the hill
Hey wait up, why don't you dump it on the burning ground
Dump it down there
Yeh man, dump the Jute
Hey man dump the Jute on the burning ground
Dump the Jute?
Yeh you know, dump the Jute
Dump the Jute!
@RegDwighт He ain't heavy, he's my brudder.
no no...I get it now, not the Bangles. You're thinking of small shiny jewelry things.
@Mitch Bangles?
no no not baubles. (I would also accept trinkets, but that doesn't share a sound).
@MattЭллен No no, not spangle. You're thinking of a breed of dog.
13:53
@Mitch Oh baubles.
What? No, I mean baubles. Cripes, get it right.
Spaniel is travelling tonight on a plane. I can see the red tail lights heading for Spain.
Oh damn it. I forgot to check the process I changed this weekend.
And now I can't until after work.
No no, not baubles. You're thinking of what Republicans exist inside of.
I want to write this email to my boss
13:54
And, now your disk is full, and all logging is going directly to email to your boss.
And I have no idea if it worked or broke something.
Geraldine ("Bubbles") DeVere is a fictional character in the second and third series of the BBC television sketch show Little Britain and its US spin-off. She is played by Matt Lucas. Characterization Bubbles DeVere is a morbidly obese, bald (though she wears a wig) woman who prefers being naked to wearing anything at all. She occasionally goes shopping in the nude, though she usually wears a small silver dress or a white dressing gown. For over a year, she has been a permanent resident at Hill Grange Health Spa (a reference to the British children's programme Grange Hill). She talks ...
its the end of project and the way it ended that we brought a foreign consultant to review out work
i want to write this or close of 'Beside the technical overview of the consultant involvement as covered by Mr.Ali, I believe meeting him for me is a life changing experience for my professional career. An opportunity that I will cherish for the rest of my life. I now truly believe that including the services of professional consultant was one of the wisest choice made for this project and decision which would greatly benefit the project and NADRA in longer run.'
Just run it again, with all logging on.
I'd post an image but it ain't safe for life.
13:54
It's the end of the project as we know it, and I feel fine.
@Mitch I can't. I can't access their server but from the laptop at home in my dining room.
Web surfing deserves a quiet night.
@KitFox oh..and your dining room is in your home, and your home is in a town which yo are not presently in.
The worst part is, I was reminded because the IT manager just emailed me to ask me how I edit the ETL file.
@Mitch Yes. About 15 miles from my current location.
@KitFox Tell him you use a text editor.
13:56
@KitFox I thoght the whole idea of this computer thing is that you tell it to do something and you can walk away.
I should so totally do that.
Tell him you fork it on GitHub.
@KitFox triangulating
I don't want to tell him at all. He can't write a select statement, he shouldn't be touching my stuff.
13:57
Dude, can you pick me up a coffee from the Strabucks you're coming up on in .... 200 yards?
Plus, apparently he took credit for the query I wrote for him last week.
@Mitch Funny, but I'm in my office, not my car.
My Mac had a kernel panic last night while I was sleeping. Tonight I'll leave some Xanax next to the machine, see if that helps.
hahaha
makes note to visit Rob's Mac tonight
@KitFox That's fine, walking will work. Thanks.
@KitFox tell him you don't apprecieate his advances and that he should behave in a more professional manner
13:58
I don't know what to tell him.
"Fuck off" was the first thing that came to mind.
Followed by "Figure it out."
I've found that that tactic doesn't always work.
They won't bother you anymore, that'l work.
"Fuck off" is so 1990s. Tell him "Ask on SO".
@KitFox Or you could be a little more artful: YOU: "Do you like sex and travel?" YOUR BOSS: "Uh, why sure!" YOU: "Then go FUCK OFF!"
nais
Right. There's that, too.
Traveltravel.stackexchange.com

Launched Q&A site for road warriors and seasoned travelers.

47
Relationships and Dating

Proposed Q&A site for people seeking answers to questions about dating, long term relationships, love, marriage or other commitments, and everything else typically considered a "relationship".

Currently in commitment.

14:00
"Check Travel.SE for places where you can fuck off to."
"Relationships and Dating. Currently in commitment." You can't make this shit up.
@KitFox Or praise him with clandestine snark: "You know, your brain must be the largest single-celled organism in the world."
@Saladin "As well as the technical overview of the consultant's involvement, as Provided by Mr. Ali, I would like to say that meeting him has improved my career immesurably. I now truly believe that employing a professional consultant was the wisest choice made for this project and that doing so in future projects will benefit NADRA in the long run."
@Robusto he'll probably like it, just like the glue on the wheels on progress.
@RegDwighт "Mental Health Solutions: Currently in Commitment" See, I made that one up.
14:02
@Robusto see, that was different shit.
@RegDwighт Of course.
You didn't make up this shit. You made up that shit.
But it was really great shit, Mrs. Presky.
Gah. And he replied to just me. So should I put everyone back on the email, so they all know that he's asking me this question? I wouldn't, except for his whole "look what I wrote" bullshit last week.
your boss and project lead do need to know about pressures on your workload
14:04
nononono, this is my consulting gig.
He asked me to help him last week, then turned around and told the team that he wrote the thing that I wrote.
So that makes me feel unhappy and unwilling to help him further.
what a bastard
Well if he wrote it, surely he's the one to maintain it now.
Faster and better than training you.
It was a relatively basic query, but it's the principle of the thing.
Same as how I helped him get the job and the very first thing he does is talk about how he's going to eliminate the need for all the consultants.
14:06
well, then you should copy the people paying for you in, so they know what they're paying for
Just go tell him that the NSA knows all about it now.
Hmm. I wouldn't usually charge for an email response...
> I edit the ETL using BIDS (Microsoft's Business Intelligence Design Studio). I have an integration services package for the entire process, which handles the basic file checking and notifications and such, and the ETL is written in Visual Basic and uses a SQL connection to insert the data.
Is that noncommittal enough, do you think?
@KitFox it should be "an SQL"
14:21
faq [about] [help]
hmmm
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Except I say 'sequel.'
@KitFox Wow, a triple oxymoron: Microsoft / Business / Intelligence. And I didn't think it could be done.
@KitFox you should stop doing that.
@Robusto You'd love Integration Services. It really ought to be spelled c-l-u-s-t-e-r...well, you get the idea.
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 No.
ess kew el takes too long to say.
@KitFox okay, compromise. How about we both change how we say it? And everyone else too. We can call it "squeal".
14:23
How about 'skwool'?
Oh, excellent word.
oh... wait. no, squalid should be for when your squeal syntax is valid. it's squalid syntax.
Sweet.
Some days I really really hate SQL.
14:25
Really? I like it OK.
I hate how it tries too hard to be english.
I hate how null != null.
Some days I would like it a whole lot better if I could write queries and do programmatic things with one language.
well... you can
you can write programs in stored procs
which is like a procedural superset of sql
Sucky, clunky things that don't work very well, yes.
or you can embed queries into your code with linq
14:27
I don't like linq.
language integrated queries generate SQL. they work quite well. I don't know if you can do that in Vb.NET
I really don't like linq.
linq is one of the things i'm most envious of, being a java developer.
I really do like linq
Linq sucks balls. Don't tell JSB I said that though.
14:27
but it's not SQL, it's based on something else
but lately i've been working with php and OMFG it's like trying to code while a deranged monkey is hammering nails into your head. Doesn't help that I have contractors hammering nails right above my head, either.
It's fucked up sql syntax and really slow.
@KitFox Well, if you had balls you'd understand why JSB is so partial to Linq.
I suppose that's true.
just strap on a pair
14:28
@KitFox yeah, once you realise it's not SQL syntax it's a lot easier.
I'm sure you have some lying around.
My sprocs are faster and easier to manage than linq anything.
oh, I hate sprocs so much.
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 I'm not so sure.
@KitFox borrow your husband's.
14:29
They are rather generous.
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 How do you cache your queries without sprocs?
@Robusto In a hash map
essentially
Our application framework does the transaction management and caching automatically in a Command class. Just subclass the command whenever you need to go to the db, and specify a Cache object to store the data in, and whatever the command returns is put in the cache automatically. You can also override cache-key creation or whatever else you want to if you need finer-grained control.
The big advantage is that then all the SQL is accessible in Java. we can easily run multiple versions of the app at the same time, even if they need different sql for the same tables.
Deployment is much easier to manage: the entire codebase is in one file (an .ear file).
Cool.
(we do have some sprocs, but we try to avoid them unless performance demands it, which is rare)
It's a custom framework, so we don't have all the cool things that some other J2EE frameworks have, but it works really well for our use-case. And the automatic caching is extremely useful.
When there was all this big hoopla about memcached on the web a few years back, and how using it would revolutionize your app development and performance, I was like "wha? srsly? people aren't doing this already?"
But I guess in the PHP world caching is much harder, because the php app is essentially stateless.
I will admit that in some cases, where the DB is not meant to be accessible to the outside world, except through a well-defined API, using sprocs to form that API might make sense. However that severely limits developer agility.
but decreases DB admin agitation
14:46
@MattЭллен yeah but DB admins need to keep sight of the goal. The goal is not "happy DB admins".
Deutsche Bahn AG (DB AG, DBAG or DB) is the German railway company, a private joint-stock company (AG) with the federal government being its majority shareholder with its headquarters in Berlin. It came into existence in 1994 as the successor to the former state railways of Germany, the Deutsche Bundesbahn of West Germany and the Deutsche Reichsbahn of East Germany. It also gained ownership of former railway assets in West Berlin held by the Verwaltung des ehemaligen Reichsbahnvermögens. Its name means "German Railway" in German. Deutsche Bahn describes itself as the second-largest tra...
@RegDwighт Hahahaha, DBAG .
That makes all of these bankers into bagmen, no?
No. DouchBAGs.
15:03
@Robusto Deutschebags
Deutsche Bank AG (literally "German Bank"; ) is a German global banking and financial services company with its headquarters in the Deutsche Bank Twin Towers in Frankfurt, Germany. It employs more than 100,000 people in over 70 countries, and has a large presence in Europe, the Americas, Asia-Pacific and the emerging markets. In 2009, Deutsche Bank was the largest foreign exchange dealer in the world with a market share of 21 percent. Deutsche Bank has offices in major financial centres including London, New York City, Singapore, Hong Kong, Tokyo, Paris, Moscow, Sydney, Toronto, Istanb...
There's a steady supply of those.
Here, a dbag with class.
at least 641 classes? and they call the UK a classist society
Well, you are a classist society of snobs, not dbags.
Some people even have "douchebag" written right over their face.
15:11
lol
1
Q: If a lunchbox contains an apple, then the apple is contained in a lunchbox. Can the phrase, 'is contained in' by substituted by a single word?

user18921If a lunchbox contains an apple, then the apple is contained in a lunchbox. Is it possible to replace the phrase 'is contained in' with a single word? I can't think of one, and the thesaurus hasn't been very helpful, either.

"hate" : that apple hates the lunch box
lots of words will fit in there, in fact. I think hate is the most apropriate
He is mimicking Yoichi.
Comma after three words.
15:29
Comma after three, words. FTFY.
Two words:
15:45
Ok guys, time for a homophoney check! For who else besides me are these homophone pairs: call Mitch / calm itch; call meeting / calm eating; call men / calm en; call master / calm aster; call maker / calm acher; call mice / calm ice; call mode / calm ode; call murk / calm irk; call moos / calm ooze.
calls @Mitch
So you pronounce the L in "calm"? It's mostly silent for me.
"call Mitch / calm itch" I get that all the time.
not the calling part.
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Yes, I pronounce the L in calm.
Southern Californians notably do not.
the a in call is different to the a in calm for me
For me it is identical.
15:50
hmm... I don't really pronounce the 'l' but those are all pretty indistinguishable pairs to me.
Interesting.
For me the only difference is that calm has an M on the end.
but it is not as invisible as the 'l' in 'talk', that is definitely 'tawk'.
So you say call and add an M.
I'd more likely confuse "call Mitch" and "cull Mitch"
@Mitch Agreed.
15:51
@MattЭллен I'd prefer the first.
For me calm is like car ending with M, no L (and perhaps a slightly longer A)
Yeah but your accent is an Ingy one. :)
But it is not the same A as in the crow's caw! caw!
@Hugo Karma collision.
nope, and yes, calm is like karma without the last a: karm
Arrhoticities.
15:53
@tchrist indʒi: or iŋii: ?
Ing + Ee.
Like finger.
@tchrist I pronounce the 'r' a lot there.
@Mitch Exactly.
Oh, that's iŋgi:
Right.
There is a lot of variation on the roundedness of English vowels.
15:55
@tchrist Did I misunderstand your comment on the answer to the delve/span answer?
I do the same thing with wolf, golf, gulf, elf, bulk.
@MετάEd I don't know.
woof != wolf
But for a lot of people, it is.
@MετάEd The actual quote, which can be found in the OED citation for spin (verb.) is “When Adam dalve, and Eve span, Who was than a gentle-man?” from 1560 in Pilkinton’s Exposition upon Aggeus. There can be no question whatsoever that this is the past tense of spin. — tchrist yesterday
I think all these people who think span is from span not from spin are completely bonkers.
This leg-spreading thing grosses me out.
@tchrist I saw your comments, yes. The answer at issue though is suggesting that it's a pun. Puns of course are notorious for ignoring all the rules of the language.
The other answers are flawed along the lines of your comments, but not this one.
16:04
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Really? I don't think it limits my agility at all. But I guess that's because it's all me.
I am sooo hungry.
bbl
@KitFox yes. Because you are the gatekeeper of the DB's API and also its only consumer, so you can do whatever makes you happy in both roles. But when they are separate, the DBAs protect their kingdom as if the developers were invading hordes. Makes it harder to, eg, add a column to a table and query on it, or something.
16:23
I see. I guess I understand that.
It's hard for me to think of those as separate roles.
It's also hard to type with a burrito in my mouth.
try typing with the keyboard in your mouth.
That didn't work either. I guess my tongue isn't as flexible as it used to be.
Suck it.
Pardon?
If it doesn't work.
> PS I chose to answer the OP, regardless of the other answers, which were too long.
16:39
What's that about?
Part of an answer.
14
Q: 'The X-ing of Y' vs just 'X-ing Y' : why are both 'the' and 'of' necessary together?

Matt ЭлленTake the example of There is very little that a conforming POSIX.1 application can do by catching, ignoring or masking SIGSYS (From the SIGSYS article) This can be rewritten as There is very little that a conforming POSIX.1 application can do by the catching, ignoring or masking of SI...

Yes, I think I should delete that, since it doesn't answer the question.
debates
No!
It adds something. And it's funny.
Improvised gas masks.
@Cerberus looks comfy
A few of those (with plastic wrap) look downright fatal.
16:46
Nice, huh?
Now Erdogan threatens to call in the army, which is obviously foolish.
> Unfortunately, the mainstream media now seems far more interested in what I said when I was 17 or what my girlfriend looks like rather than, say, the largest program of suspicionless surveillance in human history.
ohmygod, people care more about gossip than their privacy! I have made a huge mistake.
You'd think with all those FB posts at his disposal, he could have figured this out sooner.
@JohanLarsson Right, I was just going there. Too bad it's a jungle. Where are his answers?
@JohanLarsson It's the stupidity of celebrity culture.
@Cerberus I scrolled down a bit on the link
@Cerberus like liking kings and queens :D'
16:59
@JohanLarsson Like being interested in their private lives.

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