Marked this comment as caught correctly (tp). Currently marked 1tps/0fps. beep boop My human overlords won't let me flag that, so you'll have to do it yourself.
I don't really agree with this approach, as it is still conveying the message that a woman is only worthy of respect if they're personally related to him, it will not fix the problem in the long run. Another important part of it is that he might not even be THAT aware of the experiences of his female relations. I did have a run-in with a colleague (that worked on HR, that's even worse) that was making sexist comments and would be completely immune to this. In the end I just point-blank stated that the comments were really sexist and he should stop. He's from HR, he knows the consequences. — Juliana Karasawa Souza1 min ago
Calling IPS people to the rescue: we have some issues evaluating whether this answer should remain, as it may look quite violent to allies and people concerned to be compared to maintainers of oppressives regimes. Could you tell us what you think about it? interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/22414/…
Eeeeehhhh. @Imus as much as I appreciate this... perhaps it's better to focus that kind of stuff on recent questions, not the ones that are almost a year old, posted by now deleted user accounts :P All those comments to clean up!
No, the discussion with Tink before she asked the question about the aftermath of gossip
A big point in that discussion was that I'm really good at annoying people with my indifference :)
Mostly meant as a joke, and ofcourse it was never my intention to give Tink work as a result of my badge hunt. yet at the same time it's true. I'm good at ignoring things people accuse me of without feeling bad about it
On the plus side: if you ever feel like insulting someone as a way to vent, it's preferable you pick me :) I don't care and those that would care don't have to deal with it ^^,
disclaimer: might not work as you intended if you expect any sort of serious response from me if you do though ...
Just an addition - don't compliment strangers on foundation, concealer, etc, because it's usually used to hide something, or could . Instead, focus on eyeliner, eyeshadow, or lipstick - I (a girl) have complimented a lot of people on those and they all seem genuinely happy. — tryin19 secs ago
@avazula It does include unnecessary details even though question clarifies that there's no such highly valued agenda.
Feel free to delete my comment if you can include the message in yours/other mod's. https://interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/22414/how-to-ask-my-office-to-remove-the-pride-decorations-without-appearing-anti-lgbt#comment89440_22424
<rant> I don't like the LGBTQ question anymore. I understand that in certain places it's a real issue in how LGBTQ or otherwise are treated with a lack of respect. But is that really a reason to go on a witchhunt agains anyone who might give the smallest hint of oposition? When people have to be afraid to even propose to remove decorations several weeks after pride month, aren't we taking things a bit too far in the other direction? </rant>
I don't like the question anymore because I answered it and now I can't be a helicoptermod fixing problems there... LGBTQ questions are always going to get like that, along with anything mentioning veganism or religion :/ People have opinions, you know :P
@Tinkeringbell At least on veganism the consensus is that "yes you're allowed to be vegan, and some accomodation should be made to make you comfortable, but if you start dictating how others should be treating you, you should expect some pushback from the community"
on LGBTQ it's: "yes you're allowed to not be straight, and if anyone dares mention anything that isn't putting you on a pedestal we're going to try to get him fired over it"
I think what went wrong here is that I failed to realize the implications of the language in that post, and was too enthusiastic about answering it... It should've been edited a lot, maybe even closed. But it feels like a conflict of interest to do so now, to moderate the kind of language that answers reacted too, because I have my own answer and 'invalidating' others is never nice, but certainly not if that only makes your own answer look better.
@Tinkeringbell The language of the post is needed to show what exactly is OP's problem, I think
It could very well be possible that OP isn't really pro-LGBTQ but he's also not against it. There shouldn't be anything wrong with such a neutral standpoint in the workplace, so why can't het just ask to get those decorations removed without fearing a huge backlash
And the way it's answered or an answer like mine is treated are exactly validating that fear for backlash which isn't fitting in a workplace. Hence why I don't like the question anymore :)
Anyway, I'm done ranting about it now. Thanks for listening, and I know we wont be able to change anything here anyway ^^,
@Imus Do note that Netherlands/Belgium differ a huge amount with e.g. America. In America, you probably really would have to fear for your life :/ But OP is from the UK, so I think it's more reasonable to assume a Dutch/Belgian POV ;)
@Imus It's an international site, so yeah... this is probably never going to really change, only moderated ;)
It is an approach I regularly use, to jokingly tell people that there's a reason I didn't become a teacher and that their questions are boring me. It works fine. Yet America finds it rude :P
I even had a (now deleted, not suggesting improvement) comment on mine saying that asking about removing stuff was arrogant and snarky...
It's... difficult. And why I always try to mention a cultural background if I feel it might help people interpret my answer as coming from my culture. Not that it helps :P
Same here... though I believe it's not so much the room to build stuff (Plenty of room in Flevoland, I think), but the people to build stuff and the materials to build stuff, and people willing to live somewhere besides the Randstad :)
One of my coworkers has sent a meeting invite to someone from another hospital with topic "Sh*t happens"
auch XD
context: we're playing boardgames during our lunch brake, the one we're playing today is actually called "Sh*t happens". The meeting request was sent to the wrong person with the same name as one of the players ...
Latest addition to our software was integrating new speechrecognition software. On the one hand really cool, on the other a real pain to get working correctly cause our workflow is slightly different from what the company that wrote that software is used to
Those stupid Dutch with their different workflows :p
That's probably also as much details as I'm allowed to say to random strangers on the interwebs XD
Anyone in the loop can probably already tell exactly where I work, and if they work here as well, can also tell exactly who I am now ... woops :p
@Imus XD. We're having someone over to put new tiles in our hallway/toilet. I promised my mom I'd make sure he'd get some coffee and a cookie at 10-ish... but it's kinda really awkward to make someone coffee, and have a cup of tea, and then sit at the same table and trying to talk about stuff :P
@Tinkeringbell step 1: Taste the coffee. Step 2: be like 'ugh, I hate coffee'. Step 3: Make some tea or hot chocolate. Step 4: You're now both drinking either tea or hot chocolate, so conversation is unable to be awkward
Suutei tsai (Mongolian: сүүтэй цай, ᠰᠦᠨ ᠲᠡᠢ ᠴᠠᠢ, Turkish: sütlü çay) (literally "tea with milk") is a traditional Mongolian beverage. The name suutei tsai in Mongolian means milk tea.
The drink is also known as süütei tsai, tsutai tsai, or Mongolian salty tea.
== Preparation ==
The ingredients to suutei tsai are typically water, milk, tea leaves and salt. A simple recipe might call for one quart of water, one quart of milk, a tablespoon of green tea, and one teaspoon of salt. But the ingredients often vary. Some recipes use green tea while others use black tea. Some recipes even include butter...
You'll be hard pressed to find someone on SE who's more obsessed about tea than I am... I tend to get obsessed about stuff
@ankiiiiiii I know they do this in e.g. China, although I didn't know that's the reason. It does make for a more enjoyable pouring experience though :)
A moderator could perhaps edit the OP's question and add his comment somewhere, which would make it more accessible than here: "I really like this answer because it mirrors what I actually did. Sitting here at this moment, I just conversed with my fiancee and revealed everything. She was thankful not to be left in the dark. However, there is a key element of timing with that: I only shared this information with my fiancee AFTER the bachelorette party. If I had shared this information before that party, it would have been "let out of the bag." Cheers, and thanks for the advice! – typewriter" — Tim39 secs ago
@Mithrandir24601 I have a psychological aversion to sugar sweetened beverages. I like all my drinks to be calorie free because I've found it's way too easy to overeat when you drink things with calories in them
@IPSCommentBot @Tim Ehh, that's not really what we want: Questions should be as self-sustaining as possible. If OP really did this and it worked, leaving a comment like they did is okay enough (it would be best if they accepted the answer, but we can't force that)...
@Magisch I too have an aversion for sweetened beverages but not for the same reasons ;) I hate the taste. There's a sour taste lasting after you drank the stuff, I can't stand it.
@JourneymanGeek I'm trying to watch my caffein intake. Started yesterday, trying to restrain to 4 coffees a day. Honestly, it's hard, and realizing it's hard scares me a bit :p I drink way too much (unsweetened) coffee.
@Magisch I don't think I'm addicted, since I have no issues not drinking coffee in certain circumstances, e.g. on weekends. It's just the work situation: I drink too much coffee, and drink too much in general (I'm at like 3+ liters of water a day...). Drinking is a stress reaction for me
a lot of people like the energy caffeine consumption gives them, and some have a psychological addiction, but even people who consume too much usually do so out of habit not a real dependance
unless you're chaining like a gram and a half of caffeine shots or tablets each day in which case you may get heart problems sooner rather then later
@Imus Neutral isn't really neutral anymore at any point these days
Just today I saw someone I follow on twitter say essentially that if you're neutral/not political on any issue, you're essentially endorsing the status quo on it
@Tinkeringbell And parrots. Especially green ones :p
Background
I've been seeing my partner for a few years now. We are both young adults, have busy but stable jobs, and have our own living spaces. We have a very loving and supportive relationship. My only problem is my partner's place is usually very messy, and they have very poor cleaning and or...
@avazula yes, we're talking about drinking calories with the help of shakes made of cold milk because it is not good for tea according to master-tea-chef @Mithrandir24601
How come I dint get any chat notifications when I was on Apple.se? Do I need to log specifically into chat.SE?
I'm a member of a band, band "A", which has played together for over a year. For the past year, band "A" has been basically the only musical project for all of the members. We just started renting a house and living together primarily so that we can practice together more often and take the band ...
I'm married with two grown sons, 30 and 32 years old. The eldest, Seth, lives nearby, so we see each other 2 to 4 times a month and on the one hand, we are very friendly with each other, but on the other hand, Seth is able to criticize or ridicule me for just about everything that I say or do. It...