(Mods, not sure that this is the right site for the question, please move it if appropriate)
A friend of mine (let's call her Anne) was recently drawn into attending life-coaching sessions with Next Level Trainings, which is a scam based on the Lifespring model (tl;dr they give you a psychologic...
I think the title sums it up. For those not familiar:
Juneteenth is the oldest nationally celebrated commemoration of the ending of slavery in the United States. From its Galveston, Texas origin in 1865, the observance of June 19th as the African American Emancipation Day has spread across th...
@ExtrovertedMainMan About this one I started recently considering.... Is it actually a bad thing? I mean.... leaving the intends of the coaches to earn money with it aside... I mean even if the attendees are just being manipulated into feeling better and having a totally new life style by that. It doesn't change the fact that the impact is the promised and the attendees get for their money what they were promised. Its just for different reasons than what was praised.
I mean its sad that people have to pay such loads of money to get this from someone (Or is it maybe even part of the psychological effect)? But in the end people get what they were promised, so I am not sure if this would be a "scam" per se.
Looks like a lot of people sleep at this time in their timelines when I am here in a cafe confused between good morning or good noon. It still gives a tint of what to do. I recommend framing it as how to do such that this happens.
@dhein Thats the same discussion as to whether claiming miracle drugs and giving someone sugar pills is unethical. Due to the placebo effect, sometimes it does have the intended effects
See the last line of the suggested post by Em C. It goes how to do such that I don't hurt their feelings. That would be narrowed down a lot already and would not invite arrogant or racist answers. https://interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/11575/23177 is answer I and 72 others find good from the suggested link by Em c. Yours is already out of downvotes and would open as soon as people wake up. @thehole
@dhein Wiki also rarely calls it scam. People were against it and there were some lawsuits.
@Magisch Apple should consider this before selling the stand. <sup>I have not used it or seen any reliable source, just the memes</sup>
@Magisch Yeh, I see what you mean. Still I think its not the very same. As I have 2 friends who also regulary spent quite some money for attending such coachings. And while I don't really like them doing it, I had asked one of them about the details a few months ago. And she explained me the way it is working for her. And they actually get there things tough. Things they can adapt to in their life and that improves their live. It improves it cause they believe in it improving it.
So the thing it has in common with miracle drugs is, both things have a flawed science behind it. But rather than a miracle drug which promises to work cause of the chemical ingredients, here people get promised to be thought things about how to improve their lives. And despite the matter being tought would scientifically not work, but rather the placebo effect making it work, here the people still get thought what they were promised to be thought for their money.
I don't really like it. But after that conversation with the mentioned friend, my view towards this became "If someone is WILLING to spend the money for it, and it infact IS helping that person, why should I want to prevent them from feeling good about it?"
I was replying to thehole if you think what this message is all about. If you mean that "oh hi I am awake.. Whatchu talking about!?" Then as I said a lot of people. What does o/ \o mean?
@Tinkeringbell I think it sortoff is when you read between the lines. What's missing is making it obviously into a frame challenge "You don't. It'll be too assertive if you try which would be interpretted as an attack. What you can/should do instead is subtly avoiding to answer."
@thehole Welcome! I see some of our users gave it a few edits, like they commented, right now it looks okay to me but I do hope this form will work for you too! :)
Or would it be valid if I put my edit in too now, leaving a comment that they can feel free to roll back to any version they find most appropiate in regards of their intend? I don't want to be rude to you ava, but I also feel bad about putting in like 10 minutes of thinking into an edit just to throw it away '^.^
@avazula Well, I am a bit worried, cause my edit changes the frame of the question to another intend I intepreted the originial OP, and since yours made it being fine now, I am a bit hestiate to just edit it into something worse by possibly having missunderstood OP's intend :x
@Imus Perhaps it needs a gentle poking so that people don't need to read between the lines? :P
@ankiiiiiii This one is... awkwardly short. I'm not fond of that one: They say they usually reply anyways (instead of declining), then say a bit about being bolder but don't really include whether or not that both communicates and interest in continued conversation along with not wanting to answer a particular question :/
This Q&A is rapidly turning into some kind of 'come up with the funniest reply' contest :/
@Tinkeringbell I'm thankful, we don't have this problem yet here. I wish it will keep going like that, my apartment tend to be at the same temperature as the outside (very cold in winter, and I'm guessing very hot in summer ><)
@Ælis Well, I still don't like it. But I understand, that the system somewhat enforces this actions to be taken, as otherwise they might later get overseen.
@dhein Yep, especial since this answer isn't that new ^^
@dhein I know @Rainbacon is repulsed by a lot of food texture. I don't really have this problem myself but I know it's a common issue for people on the autism spectrum
That answer looks like it would be equally good if they just removed the "due to being on the autism spectrum".
From what I would guess, it's not that the autism is the direct cause of disliking most foods, it's that the autism prevents them from "learning to eat" some things that someone else would even if both start with the same dislikes.
@Imus True, but for the sake of completness, I can relate why they mentioned it there and also can see why it might not feel complete for them without mentioning it.
@Ælis Never heard of that, and would be interested in some details. As my best friend developed a meat alergic over the past years and the docotors all seem clueless how this can happen, while I have quite some troubles with some foods, too. And just accepted being very picky in regards of food, but would also like to know if it could have some relevance for me, too
@Imus As just said, I have no idea if the reasons for me are the same as the reasons for Rainbacon bringing it in connection with autism. But for me it is the exact other way round. A lot of food I remember when I started disliking, was because I HAD to eat them in specific ways or was forced to finish my plate. So these tastes have a connection for me with bad experiences being made.
It at least sounds plausible that people with autism are over sensitive to certain senses which could explain why certain textures/colors/smells are too intense.
@Magisch And that is exactly the reason for my first guess. Someone with autism is over sensitive about a certain thing so will not like most foods. And unlike someone else, they can't "learn to eat" it
personally, I can learn to control my reaction, e.g suppress a panic attack, work to not show intense discomfort, and learn when migraine is coming so I can go away soon enough, but no amount of exposure will make the effects themselves less detrimental
To add on that: The most horrible taste food has to me, is spinach. If I even have the tiniest taste of it on my mouth I immediately get a throw up reflex I hardly can suppress. And actually my mom didn't like spinach herself so the first time I had to try it was when I was having lunch at a daycare mothers place. It probably wasn't even about the taste, but just the look that made me not "like" the food.
But I got forced to finish my plate and she even force feeded me by fixing my head and pushing the spinach into my mouth.... So I see some connections here. Also adding to that. Food, I d…
@dhein Traumatic experiences like that are not only for autism. My father-in-law also doesn't eat spinach because of how it was served when he was a child. Never got over that
Although it could be that the autism makes the effect even stronger ... we can never tell for sure
My own father once had a bad experience with eating cheese, and since then only likes cheese if it's "processed" into food (like melted over pizza for example). He can't eat "raw" cheese normally XD
@avazula Thats what I mean. It styles itself as an autism advocacy group, but it's a group full of people who aren't autistic who think they need to work to speak for and cure those poor souls. It's dehumanizing and sickening. I don't need someone to tell me what and how I feel and certainly not a group of wackjobs one step above antivaxxers
That's also perfectly fine for us, as long as they take the bite eventually before saying "i don't like this"
It happened more than once that once they took the bite they just finished the entire plate anyway because they like it :p
@Tinkeringbell Side note on that one: Since kids usually complain before tasting just to get attention our aproach there was to have the parent/grandparent "force" them to take the bite while the rest mostly ignores the kid, so we wouldn't "all be watching"
I'm kinda happy with my in-law family in that regard. Their overal aproach and behaviour in such situations has proven to work better than my own family XD
Certain other aspects my own family does better in my own experience. My wife though can't really deal with that alternative way of doing stuf because it's too different from what she's used to.
I have some many things where I now think 'I'd do that differently', and so many where I think 'I'd love doing that too, but society would never accept a kid raised that way anymore'...
one of the reasons I don't want kids is that I'd get headaches from them talking loudly and with a kit you can't really go "yeah well I need a few hours/days off from your talking right now"
@Magisch if it's only 1 kid you can teach it to be mostly quiet. Several kids together on a family day with their nieces/nephews will be loud no matter what you tought them
@Magisch That's why I don't want kids. I would only be able to care for them part-time (like 1/3 of the day). The only way I would have kid is if I know I can say "That's it, I'm too tired now" and I would know that someone else would be there to take care of the kid(s)
@Tinkeringbell That would be difficult. It requires a lot of patience, leading by example and most importantly, buy in from everyone else around the kid to do the same
@Imus I'm seeing a lot of similarities. Trust me its harder to do in a college setting specially if people aren't that LGBT accepting and make fun of doing such things
@Magisch I wouldn't mind coming home where people are talking if I can retreat into my quiet room and not be expected to do anything (and, after one or two hours, I would have regain enough energy to be able to socialize a little)
@ankiiiiiii Mind if I guess you're male? I somehow got the assumtion that this is far more tolerated for 2 girls to do than it is for boys in a college setting ...
@Ælis yeah, a coworker of mine is currently dealing with twins. Not only does he not get time off when coming home (his wife works too), pretty much every waking moment is spent with the kids, and most of the time, the amount of sleep he gets daily is about 4-6 hours right now
I would be ready to committ myself to a mental institution in a week
adults either get more accepting (most usual is "I don't care about you in any way") or more extreme (really homophobic, best to be completely avoided if possible)
@Magisch I did some summer day camp job when I was younger. After a week, I was exhausted and wanted everything to be over. After two weeks, it was even worse. The third week, my body completly shutdown (like I was unable to walk fast without feeling dizzy). By the end of the last month, I was so tired it was like I was on some kind of drugs (the illegal kind) all the time. Then the job was over and I promised myself to never do that again, ever.
Quick note: kids will tease you for anything they can find. Whether it's being gay, having red hair or just having said that one stupid thing 10 years ago, you'll be bullied for it. So try not to let it get to you too much. At least coworkers are kinda forced to act more professional :p
Yes I hope so.. for the note : The thing is I won't be sticking to anyone in the office anyway.. Better be say in front of one's house while dropping etc or car lot but somewhere where sex is not expected or presumed
@ankiiiiiii It's kinda funny that all gay coworkers mention their spouse as "my partner" instead of "my wife/husband". Which once you notice it is really obvious but is subtle enough to get by most people.
Funny how I (unknowingly) responded with "your wife then?" at which point they had to "come out". Luckily to find out that I truly didn't mind and we had a topic to talk about in the hall way on our way to get food. Like "(how) do you tell your coworkers you're gay?"
was on a call.. About coming out: There are 5 boys in my campus out of 6000 that I know are out. 2 girls at max. idk if they even find partners. Going to the gym ..(Tonu if some of you might remember. 😅) Goodbye :) Leaving Aelis and Magisch..
I think the title sums it up. For those not familiar:
Juneteenth is the oldest nationally celebrated commemoration of the ending of slavery in the United States. From its Galveston, Texas origin in 1865, the observance of June 19th as the African American Emancipation Day has spread across th...
