The Awkward Silence

dhein

5:21 AM

Morning :)

Ahoj

Hello :)

Afternoon!

6:21 AM

0

Q: How to talk to my landlord about a playmate of his daughter stressing me?

So I am living in a 3 party house, which was a generation house before 1 flat got free like 2 years ago and I moved in half a year ago (Might be relevant). My landlord and his wife life in the flat under me, and his wifes mother under them. He has a daughter I would estimate in the age between 6...

CaldeiraG

6:54 AM

Morning :)

Tinkeringbell

Morning :)

JAD

hai

CaldeiraG

7:11 AM

5

A: Under new processes, Monica's removal should complete the Conduct Review, not request Reinstatement

The reinstatement process is a red herring with regards to Monica's situation. SE did not follow their own removal process (It didn't exist then, granted, but still). This wasn't an emergency removal (nobody has claimed that) from this should follow that if not null and void, her removal mu...

"De novo" - hey, that's my language :p

means "again"

Belle

7:27 AM

Morning

dhein

Hey

Introverted Meta Man

0

Q: Edit of a post according to "gender policy"

This is about the answer I made here. The suggested edit has been approved (see history here) The comment says: Having the assigned gender doesn't add anything and is mildly offensive. Many trans consider themselves to have always been their gender. I made the original comment ("about him") to ...

discussion editing

Ælis

8:04 AM

@Tinkeringbell Do you know if we have a general guideline about when it's best to directly edit and when it's best to leave a comment?

Tinkeringbell

@Ælis "Gut feelings"

I don't think we have a meta post yet, I could try and see if there's something on MSE

Ælis

@Tinkeringbell Yeah, that's what I use too x)

I think, my way of doing it is more:

"if you think the person wouldn't mind, just edit"

"If you think the person would mind, ask first"

"If it rude or abusive, just edit it out as quieckly as possible"

Tinkeringbell

There's also 'Does this really improve the post, does it need this improvement'

JAD

8:20 AM

Tricky part, if I understand things correctly, is that where it was edited because it might be offensive, the edit does harm to the message of the answer

question is where you draw the line and how to decide ambiguities

Tinkeringbell

In this case, that's why 'edit, but then have someone ask/explain more on meta' is about as good as it can get.

This was really ambiguous.

Alex Robinson

I think that question has definitely been improved

avazula

8:38 AM

Psst ... this got closed without comments ... could you guys explain your choice to OP please? That'd be nice :)

Belle

Oh, a person from the shelter came visit our house on the weekend, to see if it was appropriate for the kitty I linked last week. Our house was deemed not good enough :(

avazula

@Belle Really? o_o

Belle

@avazula they said the cat absolutely had to stay inside, because he might die if he gets outside and I like opening the windows to air the room and the cat could get out through the windows

user58

is getting a screen an option?

Belle

@user58 I was planning to, but they said the cat would just destroy the screen if he wants to go out

user58

8:49 AM

would also prevent bugs from getting in

@Belle :/

Belle

@user58 Yeah, we have a bit of a fly problem in this neighbourhood, so a screen has been planned for a little while. My dad (carpenter) promised to help me install it as soon as I got it. I'd just have to go get one. Takes like a day max?

I've only lived here for a few months and it's winter now, so the screen hasn't been that high priority

user58

Depends on how your window's built, I guess. It would take around fifteen seconds for me to swap out my screen on my window, since it's on a track.

Belle

The shelter didn't want to allow me to adopt any of their cats, unless I built a pen in the garden.

user58

(Autocorrect, stop messing up my messages!)

@Belle welp

You can't get an outdoor cat?

Belle

I decided to adopt from a different shelter that doesn't have the "don't let the cats outside because they might die"-rule.

avazula

8:54 AM

@Belle o_o that is messed up

user58

I'm not used to this idea of no cats outside, there are almost more half-feral cats here than people

Probably more of an issue in larger cities, though.

How many people where you live, roughly?

Belle

10k. I live on the edge of town, across the street is nothing but plains.

Alex Robinson

that question on hold is h*cking long...

CaldeiraG

@user58 True, i never saw this idea too, my cats were outside all the time and my last cat lived for almost the same age I am

user58

Oh, 10k. I saw 40k. Whoops. :P

Belle

8:57 AM

@user58 I fatfingered the wrong button xD

user58

Okay, that's only a bit larger than here. I don't see why it'd be a huge problem unless you have a ton of vehicle traffic.

Belle

There's an 80 km/h road in front of our house, but it's elevated and walled off. There's no chance the cats would go on it. The road we live on has hardly any traffic and all the neighbourhood cats know how to use the tunnel to go to the fields.

I've got two cats right now and one goes outside for a few hours a day. He likes to hunt. The other one is blind, so I don't let him outside. But his handicap makes it impossible for him to escape. I'm looking for a friend for the blind one, so I'd prefer a cat that has no interest in going outside or is unable to escape as well.

I'm happy to place a screen in the windows. But surrounding our house, which I rent, with a pen to keep a perfectly healthy cat that wants to go outside inside, is not something I want to do.

dhein

9:56 AM

@user58 What do you consider feral people, tho? :P

AGirlHasNoName

10:50 AM

please-review-this-comment-and-flag-as-your-conscience-tells-you comment

Alex Robinson

why is that a tag...

that is a very valid and thoughtful answer

AGirlHasNoName

@AlexRobinson because otherwise I get accused of vote brigading anything that disagrees with me respectfully

hi @avazula

avazula

@AGirlHasNoName hey there :)

Alex Robinson

thats an oof

JAD

@AlexRobinson it's not a tag, anything can be shown as a tag in chat: [tag:hello-alex]: hello-alex

wrong braces :/

but that doesn't mean it's actually a tag on IPS

Alex Robinson

11:04 AM

ohhh i see

AGirlHasNoName

ohh yeah sorry. I misunderstood the question

status-tag-making-time

ohhh. How do you make the red tags?

JAD

not sure. maybe metatag?

this

nope, grey

mod tag or something I guess, since those red tags are mod-only

[mod-tag:test]

d'oh

Alex Robinson

I can't wait to be a cool kid making these fake tags

JAD

lol

you-can-only-talk-in-tags-and-be-cool

AGirlHasNoName

i-need-to-get-ready-for-work--bye-all

JAD

11:25 AM

cya

Alex Robinson

is-it-really-that-easy-to-do

i-guess-it-really-is

JAD

its-kinda-tedious-with-the-lack-of-interpunction-though

avazula

...

dot-dot-dot

JAD

@avazula la-la-la--cant-hear-you

@avazula thats-better

avazula

haha

CaldeiraG

11:40 AM

tag-madness-i-see

@ankii doggo :D

avazula

My eyes hurt

@CaldeiraG doggoooo! :D

I had missed it, thanks Cal!

dhein

@avazula I didn't VTC it, but job is done x)

avazula

@dhein ooh, thank you then :)

dhein

nothing to thank for.

Btw, do I get the new CoC correct, that I am prohibited to write "them"/"their" now anymore? Like having to say He/She in regards to gender rather than sex? Or is it just when addressing someone and the person I address (in third person...) on this platform informs me about the preferred pronoun to be used I shouldn't use "them"/"their" anymore? Also that confuses me in regards.... Is this only the case for gender != sex?

Or does it overrule the preference of some not wanting to disclose gender of individuals?

JAD

11:56 AM

@dhein nope. CoC says the following: use gender neutral language/they where possible. If someone asks you to use a specific pronoun to refer to them, comply.

(or at least, that's how I understood it)

ankii

@avazula that’s why we starred it! Hi @cal

dhein

@JAD Ahhhh. Ok, that helps. Thanks

avazula

@dhein Protip: Basically, sex is the biological material you were born with. Gender is the societal construction you choose to identify to. Therefore, pronouns refer to gender only. Now, the takeaway is: if you have to talk about someone and don't know their gender, singular they is the best option. Now, if said someone tells you they'd rather have you use other pronouns, then you should use those.

You're not and never will be obliged to disclose your gender in here :) pronouns either, that's really up to you. CoC says, "if you've been told about someone's preferred pronouns you must use it", but otherwise you're fine w/ singular they.

JAD

@avazula at the risk of opening a can of worms, is it right to refer to gender as a choice?

Tinkeringbell

@JAD Eh, not really. More a feeling than a choice, from what I got.

dhein

12:08 PM

@avazula Did I say anything contradicting to that? Then I have probably epxressed myself wrong, as that fully was my point. I only interpreted the CoC diferent from what Jad said, and that confused me, as it would have been kinda missing the point it should have.

@avazula Yeah, exactly that phrase confused me. Cause I read it as "If your best friend told you he wants now to be referred to as she, call them she here" It felt for me like overruling the case in which I'd prefer to not disclose their gender at all ^^ If that makes sense '^.^

Tinkeringbell

@dhein You mean, a best friend in real life, that you're asking a question about?

dhein

yeah

Tinkeringbell

Yeah, that'd be fine then :) If it's not relevant for the question or the answers, you can keep it out :)

Belle

Related to this gender discussion: I'm still trying to figure out mine. I got to "not-a-he". But I don't quite relate to the non-binary either. I don't know :\

CaldeiraG

@avazula You're welcome :p

@ankii Hello there :D

Belle

12:12 PM

Anyone else struggling with it?

Tinkeringbell

I'm me? :P

2

avazula

@JAD from what I've read and from my relatives' experiences, I'd think it depends. I recently read a book called "the tyranny of gender" which vastly explains how gender construction heavily relies on society's stereotypes, thence situations where it may be a choice not to conform to gender (I have some friends who are genderfluid in reaction to that). But you're right, it's best to assume it's not a choice in most cases.

dhein

@Belle exclusion procedure will get to an result in the end, too :P

Belle

@dhein That requires knowing all the options

avazula

@Belle My mom does not relate to either woman or man. She calls it "human".

dhein

12:15 PM

@Belle True, but is there actually even a fixed set? And do you necessarily need a label? Helps to find things to relate to, I know that myself, but in the end... wouldn't just figuring out what you need, work best anyways, rather than finding a label that most describes you?

@Tinkeringbell Hey! Me, too. :D

avazula

@dhein There is. I'll try to find a list in English for you (it's pretty big :) ). And does someone need a label? Depends on people. I had friends lashing out at me for coming out as autistic, saying I didn't need a label. I feel so much better since I do though. I think it's a personal choice and/or need :)

Belle

I've got this need to fit in somewhere. It's something to hold on to. Because at the moment I feel like I'm drifting too much.

avazula

@Belle Something wrong? :/

Belle

@avazula Nothing new. Just my perpetual identify crisis. And a recent loss of a friend.

avazula

I'm sorry :(

Lots of love

Belle

12:20 PM

@avazula <3

avazula

<3

Tinkeringbell

@Belle What are you missing with the 'current' gender?

Belle

@Tinkeringbell I've been bullied by girls for not being girly enough and excluded by boys for being a girl. And then there's my choice of a dominantly male careerpath.

dhein

@avazula Yeah, but my point is, no matter how long that list is, you can still find someone inbetween not fully covered by all the labels, eventually leading to new labels. And the other point I was trying to make was, that it might not work that well out, if you try to find a label to identify with. Rather try to figure what you identify as and the label will come up by itself.

You don't need to tell me about how helpfull it can be finally having such a label, no question, I am the first who would sign that.

Tinkeringbell

@Belle Ahhh. That sounds bad, sorry about that :(... I'd... almost advise to look around a little. Are the 'boys' still excluding you for being a girl (woman) now? Are the 'girls' still finding you not girly enough? Can you... just be you (a not so girlish but still a girl person?)

(Mind you, I have exactly 0 experience with picking a gender or even thinking about it... I'm just spouting things that sound sensible :P)

Alex Robinson

12:26 PM

bit late to the party but i would not describe gender as a choice

Belle

@Tinkeringbell I try to be just me. With my interests and my clothes, but I think I confuse people as much as I confuse myself at times.

Alex Robinson

also, reminder that gender isn't "just" male, female. You might be in between in one way or another

Belle

I think I'm just utterly fed up with all the expectations that come with gender. I just want to be me and be accepted that way.

4

Alex Robinson

i feel that in a big way and its one of the reasons i'd say i'm probably non binary but i'd still put myself as questioning... its hard to separate gender from gender expectations sometimes

Tinkeringbell

@AlexRobinson Did you see Belle's first message on the topic? :) Perhaps you can help better than me...

Alex Robinson

12:31 PM

yeah i scrolled up a bit when i realised there were a lot of mesages since our-fun-with-tags

avazula

hehe

Alex Robinson

the key thing i'd say is that gender is difficult to figure out, it takes some people years to truly realise their gender. However, gender isn't the be all and end all (leaving transitioning to one side because thats a whole discussion in of itself). Whilst gender does still impact some day to day things, that is slowly changing which is good i think

Tinkeringbell

@Belle Bleh, yeah. But that kinda depends more on the people around you than you, I think...

Alex Robinson

it does to an extent. i'm lucky that my friend groups are very inclusive for non cis-het people which in turn helps me figure out myself lol

Belle

At least I figured out my sexuality :)

CaldeiraG

12:43 PM

Well, I get along better with 'girls' than 'boys' which is somewhat very different from the majority :)

Belle

I've recently found out that there's a label that fits me, which is panromantic. I'm not alone, yay!

Rainbacon

Good morning everyone

dhein

@CaldeiraG Makes me wonder and curious now, which of these attributes start influencing what would be a gender and which not. The more I hear about it the more my impression starts being like, Gender is a spectrum '^.^

AGirlHasNoName

@Belle it took me years to figure out. I can chat with you on discord sometime if you want. I'm on Mobile so I can't send a link at the moment. I will later when I get home.

avazula

@Rainbacon Morning you :)

Rainbacon

12:49 PM

How are you this morning?

CaldeiraG

@dhein Perhaps :)

AGirlHasNoName

@avazula for me it is about knowing who I am. I both love and hate labels. They are great at helping us know what things are. They are also great for mischaracterizing and oversimplifying who we are. Even to ourselves.

Also, if I had a choice, I would choose to be cis.

avazula

1:05 PM

@AGirlHasNoName I'd be glad to chat with you on Discord if you're willing too.

Alex Robinson

@dhein thats because gender is a spectrum. it isn't the binary that some people are told it is

@AGirlHasNoName i strongly agree. labels are useful for finding similar people but i hate getting obsessive with having to be put into a "box" of sorts... i am me and i am unique

AGirlHasNoName

@avazula of course

@AlexRobinson I hate that I even do it to myself

Alex Robinson

yeah... i try to avoid it but sometimes its easier to answer questions with labels

ankii

@avazula does Frisbie also sleep the way Dumbo does? flat legged, it is a bit visible in the photo I posted here

Also, apple.meta.stackexchange.com/questions/3653/… in case you (plural) want to know my latest pet peeve.

Alex Robinson

1:48 PM

i agree with the message, but the question could definitely be clarified

El'endia Starman

Labels are shortcuts.

2

avazula

@ankii Not really. She rather lays on her side, her belly touching as much of the cold floor as she can.

@Rainbacon sorry to answer this late... I'm good :) overwhelmed but good!

What about you?

Rainbacon

@avazula Mostly I'm frustrated. I've been sick for the past day, which is not fun, and I finally got an answer late yesterday of "No" on the job I made it to the final round of interviews for.

CaldeiraG

stackoverflow.blog/2019/10/10/iterating-on-inclusion/…

Portuguese dilemma on gender-neutral pronoums

Alex Robinson

2:04 PM

"Wonder why many of you are taking pronouns so personal." ok buddy calm down

JAD

where does a dilemma end, and being obtuse begin?

Alex Robinson

eugh brb i actually have to do work... not just be paid do sit in an IPS chatroom

avazula

@Rainbacon oh no :( lots of love to you

Rainbacon

Thanks!

Em C

3:19 PM

@Belle catching up on transcript- what you describe sounds a lot like how I feel, "not-a-he". as far as anyone IRL needs to know I'm just a regular cis/het "she" but... ehh. thinking of myself a "woman" is kind of .. shudder .. even though "girl" was fine.. /shrug

anyways sorry for reviving this if the room was done with it. I'm on discord too if people were moving there instead :)

avazula

begins to picture a Discord server with all the amazing people from TAS in it

Em C

fair warning, if there's a memes channel I will probably spam it

Alex Robinson

i'm embarrassed that it took me a full minute to realise what you meant by TAS

El'endia Starman

Tool Assisted Speedruns? ;)

Alex Robinson

YES. i speedrun and hotline miami just got a tool literally this day that is gonna make TASing it way way way easier and i'm super excited about it

Em C

3:30 PM

@CaldeiraG this would probably be a good thing to ask if today's updated FAQ doesn't answer it - I recall reading something about how SE doesn't expect the pronoun stuff to be applied exactly the same to languages other than English, but it might be good to get a clear answer on how you're expected to translate English containing those pronouns

Tinkeringbell

Even the old CoC FAQ already mentions non-English languages as 'still being worked on' IIRC.

Alex Robinson

man SE really did not think any of this through... I know its been said before but it still just shocks me from time to time

Tinkeringbell

Meh, or maybe we're all just overthinking this ;) I can confirm it's very easy for me to overthink it...

avazula

@El'endiaStarman Portal 2 TAS speedruns are my favorites

El'endia Starman

\o/ I had no idea there were other speedrun enthusiasts in here!

avazula

3:39 PM

:D

El'endia Starman

Anyone else watch the Youtube channels Summoning Salt and Bismuth?

Tinkeringbell

I watch GDQ, does that count? :P

Em C

@avazula ooh .. somehow it never occurred to me to look up Portal speedruns :o

avazula

My social life temporarily ends during A- and SGDQs

Alex Robinson

@El'endiaStarman don't forget apollo legend

avazula

3:39 PM

@EmC omg those areTHE BEST!

El'endia Starman

@AlexRobinson Hmm, I've not heard of that one.

Tinkeringbell

I feel we might need extra mod power, someone that doesn't watch GDQ... Just to be safe :P

Alex Robinson

apollo is a little controversial because he outs a lot of cheaters in speedrunning, but his video's are largely good

avazula

@Tinkeringbell don't worry, the next one is in January only :p

Tinkeringbell

:D sounds good to me! :D

Alex Robinson

3:42 PM

does anyone here speedrun a game(s) or is it just me?

Tinkeringbell

Not me, sorry :( Just watch them.

Alex Robinson

thats fair!

avazula

I don't, but my spouse speedruns Lara Croft. Don't ask me which one :p

Alex Robinson

tomb raider has some cool stuff in it

El'endia Starman

I don't have the time or patience for speedrunning a game. I love speedrun analysis videos though.

Alex Robinson

3:43 PM

analysis of your own speedrun is half the fun ;)

i have many many spreadsheets comparing different stuff

AGirlHasNoName

3:56 PM

I vote we name the Discord server: The Awkward Server

Ælis

I was like that too. I knew I wasn't a man and I hate the idea that someone could mistake me for one. But I didn't really fell woman either.

At some point, I though "maybe I'm 66% female and 33%?" but that wasn't that either.

Then I realize that gender made utterly no sense to me, that all this gender thing was bullsh*t (to my eye) and that I was most probably agender.

(Sorry, I'm late to the party too. I was asleep most day ^^)

Tinkeringbell

@Ælis Sleep is good for you :)

Rainbacon

@Ælis I wish I was asleep most of the day

Ælis

@Tinkeringbell I think this one is drug induse though (I have a temporary medicine to treat my anxiety. It works very well expect it's probably the think that makes me so sleepy ^^)

@Rainbacon I take it you can't take a medical leave? :/

Tinkeringbell

@Ælis Yeah, well... (unless you're having horrible nightmares) you can't be anxious when you're sleeping? :P

Em C

4:10 PM

I was out sick yesterday but felt better this morning.. but now it's noon and I'm ready for a nap xP

Ælis

@Tinkeringbell It's true that I'm having a very anxious free sleep :p

Rainbacon

@Ælis It's kind of expected at my company that if you are sick you work from home and you only take a day off if you are really sick, like to the point of needing to go to the hospital.

Ælis

@Rainbacon :/ I'm glad I live in France. I do feel guilty about taking sick leave, though (when I shouldn't because I really need them)

Rainbacon

My understanding is that a lot of companies here don't mind people taking sick days, though the trend is moving towards remote work instead of taking the day off

Tinkeringbell

@Rainbacon That's... so weird! I got sent home once because I was on a pretty heavy period, and it was making me feel bad (cramps, and a bit of nausea). I was told to take off as long as I needed. So that wasn't even really sick, just feeling unwell... If I'm having a pretty heavy cold, I might work from home just to not make others ill. But if I have trouble concentrating... they rather I take the day off than do half-assed work!

Rainbacon

4:15 PM

@Tinkeringbell Are you paid a salary or hourly?

Tinkeringbell

salary

Rainbacon

ah interesting

I would understand preferring whole-assed work if they pay by the hour

Ælis

@Tinkeringbell That. If you can't concentrate on your work, what the point of paying? Better to let you go home and rest

El'endia Starman

My company is, thankfully, considerate of its employees. Practically no one cares why you take a day off and if you're sick, the default assumption is that you'll take a day off. We're also all salaried, effectively.

Rainbacon

It's entirely possible that it's not so much a company thing as it is my coworkers just prefer to not take sick days, but either way, I rarely ever see my coworkers take a sick day

Ælis

4:18 PM

@Rainbacon Yeah, when the people around you don't take sick days, you are less likely to do that yourself (because of social pressure)

Rainbacon

Yep

Tinkeringbell

@Ælis Except that even if I'm sick for a whole week, my salary at the end of the month is still the same.

CaldeiraG

@EmC +1 :D

Tinkeringbell

I think employers are some sort of insured, but I can't find sources for that memory.

CaldeiraG

@EmC i didn't even know a new FAQ was releasing today, i heard it was on the works based on the community one

But nice :D

Ælis

4:20 PM

@Tinkeringbell Lucky you. My first two (or three) days of salary won't be paid to me, and then it's the social security system that kicks in and pay you

Em C

@CaldeiraG yep, I made sure to check it was public info ;) meta.stackexchange.com/a/335868/401104

@Ælis ha.. my company is doing open enrollment to select your benefits right now, so I just realized I pay for my own long-term-disability insurance. yay 'murica

CaldeiraG

@EmC I read that but I probably missed the date :D it's not like i'm keeping track on Meta

Ælis

@EmC But, that's a good thing, right?

Em C

@Ælis well, I guess it's good there's an option for it

ankii

4:47 PM

@AlexRobinson oh was that for me? I missed it. Actually I left after some minutes.

I wanted it to be opinion based, rant inviting question actually.

and since our meta isn't tremendously participated, it shouldn't be a problem

Ælis

5:14 PM

I guess I won't have an answer to my question :'(

-2

Q: Directly editing or leaving a comment instead?

I tried to find a faq post about that, but couldn't find one. When should one directly edit a post and when should one just suggest improvement in comments instead? So far, I have been using my "gut feelings" but, for people on the autism spectrum (like me), clearly stated rules are much less s...

discussion comments edits etiquette

Or maybe that's something we should decide on IPS instead

Em C

5:32 PM

@Ælis hmm. I guess the "What is the etiquette" post implies that if your edit does not fall into the stated categories, you should be commenting instead

or, if you're not 100% sure that your edit keeps the same meaning

Ælis

@EmC Hum, I guess I will keep using my "guts feelings" then (since they seem to follow the "etiquette modifying post" things) ^^

ankii

I'd like to answer that question, at least some examples of when. after it reopens

if it doesn't i'll suggest an edit to your answer ;p

Ælis

@ankii If you know some javascript, you might be able to do so (for the next 4 hours). Just saying :p

I'm pretty sure that won't be reopened

AGirlHasNoName

which post did you try to edit?

ankii

There is only a client side check, not a server side. If you know how to enable the post answer button you can post up to 4 hours or so after a question got closed. — rene yesterday

Ælis

5:43 PM

@AGirlHasNoName None. The "edit incident" wasn't about me ^^

AGirlHasNoName

ohh

ankii

@EmC would like to edit the comment to half?

Em C

@ankii sorry, not sure what you mean?

ankii

it was impulsive, nothing in policy I think. nvm

Em C

oh I thought you were replying to my last message and was confused

ankii

5:46 PM

We've been there before.. using names highlighted last message

Em C

mods very very rarely edit comments

ankii

coz it has no records?

Em C

yeah, all users can see is the little edit icon, no history

Extroverted Main Man

0

Q: Possible Girlfriend in the ICU

Long story ahead, you've been warned. Could really use sound advice here. Some background first, I'm terrible at reading social cues, to the point when I was younger medicos told my parents I might be borderline Aspergers. I met a woman four weeks ago at a First Friday event. We got to talking ...

relationships awkward-situations boundaries romance physical-health

Em C

I think I've done it once ever? for something that was a decent comment but accidentally used an offensive word, IIRC

ankii

5:49 PM

in Ask Different Chat, Jul 12 at 6:50, by nohillside

@ankiiiiiii the only edit on that comment was done by you :-)

such a dodge :p

So how are you doing in those super awesome yellow leaves laden parks ?

Em C

well, I am back home now :'(

Ælis

@EmC Ah, I was wondering why you were so active (please, don't hit me) :p

ankii

aww, but hope you'll post some photos

Em C

but it was a nice long weekend! very nice weather to hike around on Saturday, even though it was muddy

ankii

can we have the side wall filled with images' stars? Litter box has it

user58

5:52 PM

you could, but people'd need to post more images

Em C

5

ankii

I could individually do that, but it would count as misuse if no-one else did

Em C

that one gives you an idea of how muddy it got :P

Ælis

ankii

@EmC that you walked on planks?

Em C

5:55 PM

@ankii yup!

Ælis

@user58 Or some RO could pin a lot of cute/nice pictures :p

Em C

and in spots the planks themselves were underwater.. or sank into the mud when you stepped on them, which was kind of worse

ankii

Okay that's one star from me! in the memory of a muddily pleasant hike

Em C

:D

scohe001

6:19 PM

6

It's getting colder over here, so we got the little punk a sweater. But he keeps slipping his front legs out! :(

user58

BAD WILBUR

scohe001

It's because he doesn't have a Charlotte to tell him what to do :(

Clearly we need a pet tarantula

user15026

@scohe001 awww that's adorable but also buddy keep your sweater on so you don't get the shivers!

AGirlHasNoName

Okay I made a Discord server

discord.gg/EJUpjg

Pigs are explicitly welcome there

scohe001

Awwww yissss :D

Just a bummer that discord doesn't allow file sizes big enough to send good pig videos :(

user58

6:28 PM

seems slightly... superfluous, to be honest, unless I missed something. Why the Discord?

Em C

@scohe001 awwwww this is so cute

AGirlHasNoName

(cats, forests, and parrots too)

@user58 I was making myself available for private discussions for two different people. The topic of making a server was probably done in jest but I went through with it anyway.

user58

I see

AGirlHasNoName

@AGirlHasNoName CC @Belle @avazula

ankii

How did you reply to yourself!!

AGirlHasNoName

6:35 PM

super secret ninja skills

user58

@user58 It's easier when you've got a script to add a button...

AGirlHasNoName

I don't have a script

user58

no, but i do

ankii

I'll quote the permalink :p

AGirlHasNoName

Every comment has a permalink, the reply is done by :numberAssignedToMessage

You can pull the message number from the permalink

ankii

6:37 PM

which can also be seen by hovering over the triangle

btw I just came to curse the dvoters on Catija's post. ... And I'm done doing so.

AGirlHasNoName

ohh nice tip. That will save me time in the future

ankii

@Upper_Case whenever you're around, about your comment :)

how can I see history of my custom close vote reasons?

Em C

@ankii comment history?

ankii

even though it is in comments, but they often get deleted, and here I edited the comment afterwards

ah beat me to it

Em C

;)

I guess you could search in The Closet for deleted / edited comments, but it might not have them all (and of course only works for IPS)

the only other way I know of is the "10k tools" where you can look at all custom close reasons (but it doesn't tell you which question it was on, or who wrote it)

ankii

6:48 PM

oh maybe the feature is of little importance.. I used it on AD to put 5 duplicate targets in a custom off-topic reason.

Em C

that's a lot of duplicates :o

ankii

So it would require a mod to change the final close reason

But it got 2 more support votes so far

Em C

why not just pick one duplicate target ?

ankii

that's an amalgamation.. I'd say

question goes like this. title: Is it safe? body: How can I do it ? I want to do it to reach another goal. It would ease one more thing for me.

apple.stackexchange.com/q/373276/313842 there

I was interested in whether the voters are able to see edited comment as custom vote reason, or it stays the same ?

Em C

hmm.. seems like either it should be a duplicate of one thing (and maybe some of the 5 should be duplicate-closed somehow also?), or answerable because you need to put together two parts..

@ankii I don't have an account there so I can't tell :P

ankii

6:54 PM

ik mods might keep it open, but at least it brings their attention

Upper_Case

@ankii I just saw your ping, and have popped in

ankii

I wanted to let you know that you can ask me some questions about interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/23211 in case you need them to formulate an answer. However, I might bias you to my perspective.

Upper_Case

@ankii Thank you for the offer, but I'm not sure it'll suit what I was looking for with that comment. It's not that I can't imagine plausible, even likely, details from the OP which would fit but rather that I would like more information from the OP so that I can understand their specific situation better

ankii

Oh sure! no worries :)

might I correct you about pronouns ? :p

Upper_Case

Please do, I'm sure I have room for improvement

ankii

7:01 PM

understand their (his ? ) specific situation better

just teasing..

nothing serious

Upper_Case

lol, thanks for stating it, I think I'm worse than most for getting tone from chats

ankii

haha now you'd be ping-able for another 7 days

drops out temporarily

Upper_Case

I just forgot that the OP listed his gender in the post. It's going to take some time for me to get used to double-checking the posts that way

But it will probably be worth the effort

avazula

Oh dear, @Ælis I bought some vegan steaks and omg they look and taste like beef! Not sure its gonna be your thing as I'm not sure you're one of the vegan people who still love the taste, but I do!

Ælis

@avazula I'm pretty sure I wouldn't like it, but good for you! I do still love cheese though

avazula

7:11 PM

This steaks look real

@Ælis I do too! But I had find some nice cheese alternatives already :) this is new and nice!

Ælis

@avazula I saw the picture and thought "this looks disgusting" and then I realize it was because it looks wayyyy too much real. But I guess I could get us to it again if I tried (which I won't because I don't cook :p )

@avazula I must say, I haven't really found a cheese that satisfies me so far. I'm sad that none of them taste like "emmental" or "kiri"

avazula

@Ælis I know, when I first saw it I thought some clown switched vegan steaks and animal based ones again :p

AGirlHasNoName

@avazula Was someone really doing that?

avazula

@Ælis erh, those are hard to find. I bake my own kiri, and I found quite a nice alternative to emmenthal

@AGirlHasNoName oh yeah, I find one of those at least every week ^^

AGirlHasNoName

ohh that's horrifying

avazula

7:16 PM

Vegan trend hasn't really come to our country yet :p

Ælis

@avazula Oh, I had no idea that one could bake their own kiri! But I shouldn't be surprised. Vegan people to tend to back a lot of (diverse and weird) things :p

AGirlHasNoName

MSE is about to explode. I'm out of votes and flags so I'm gonna stay away.

Ælis

@avazula Is the recipy easy to follow? I might ask one of my family member to cook some for me :p

user21820

@Belle Everyone is different. There will always be those who are not so interested in what others of the same biological gender are interested in. I think that you made the right decision in just being you, and I think it is not useful to even search for a label or category to classify yourself. There are some of us who will always simply accept you for being yourself.

avazula

@Ælis yeah, I'm amazed by vegan cooking.

@Ælis well I do mine without a recipe, with cashews, but ill sure try to look for one for you :)

@AGirlHasNoName :(

AGirlHasNoName

7:24 PM

@avazula did you join the Discord server?

avazula

7:34 PM

@AGirlHasNoName I just came home and cooked dinner so, haven't had the chance yet. Did you share the link? Its the first time ill be using discord

Oh right I just found it. Ill join but I won't be able to discuss tonight. Next time :)

AGirlHasNoName