The Awkward Silence

@Ash well, our cultures are probably super concervative

@Ash well not so :/ as challenging

Actually something the western system of dating and culture probably is easier with

user15026

Ah, okay, that makes sense, I misunderstood the "fun" part

user15026

Thanks for clarifying :)

@Ash oh, lol

"Oh hey, erm, so we're married and erm... yaaaaa.... "

XD

also its probably too early to worry XD

user15026

It's a good thing to kinda have in the back of your head a bit though :P

5:14 PM

Yeah, my tendency is to worry about little things that shouldnt be worried about... i understand the feeling

user15026

@JourneymanGeek Oh, right, I forgot about that aspect :P

@Ash well in theory you're throwing together a pair of clueless 20-30 year olds.

DOES SEEM TO WORK but...

lol

user15026

@JourneymanGeek but there's a lot of stuff to work out in there!

Yup

and zero guidence

My parents never had "the talk"

Its literally "Ok geek! You have a stable job, lets get you married"

then... IDK lol, I'm doing all the work

and if stuff does go past the "hey! I see you're looking for an alliance for your daughter " stage into psudo long distance dating, I have no idea what to do XD

Actually at this point, I'm 'managing' most of the intial matchmaking process myself - I do need to get my parents to call folks cause protocol, and no one checks their email but...

I still have no idea what I'm looking for XD

5:30 PM

geez. :/

@ElizB sadly I'm going with age filters and "eh, she looks cute"

and hoping I get more backup ;)

as is though, its awkwardly similar to applying for a job

date,page views,visits,new visits
2018-10-15,40497,16328,3491
2018-10-16,29594,12672,3350 HNQ is removed
2018-10-17,13698,5801,2608

FYI

erm..

ow

them's the breaks

Holy moly.

5:36 PM

we already know they will not revert the change though, so

make do?

@Magisch for now I guess :(

user15026

@JourneymanGeek No idea if this helps, but I've been in a long distance relationship/marriage for over 5 years now, so I mean, if it comes to that, and you ever wanna bounce things off of someone, I'm game

I thought claims of losing 75% of traffic were exaggerations, but it looks like the real numbers are surprisingly close at ~65%.

@JAD What's "new visits"?

hmm, it's not so bad compared to a week ago: 2018-10-10,24496,9315,2718

@Ash well, I've been in a few short lived ones - I guess the big pain point is I basically am going to be "Oh Hi Stranger!"

unless I creepy stalk them

5:38 PM

@El'endiaStarman not sure what Google analytics' definition is

probably first time a certain IP visits?

user15026

@JourneymanGeek ah, yeah, that does change the "get to know you" stage rather significantly

@Ash yup

especially in the era of modern social networking XD

when does it get non creepy to look up someone's facebook/twitter/linkedin?

I mean, with one set of parents my mom asked if the girl could cook

with the most recent one she didn't.

XD

all that sorta things

(also, well the fact that future mrs geek is likely to move to singapore from india, which is a pain point)

you could learn to cook

additional good asset to have

I know how to cook XD

Its a vital life skill when you're a observant vegitarian

but that's tact!

"Can you cook" vs "How do you manage living out there in $city?"

A: Revisiting the "Hot Network Questions" feature, what are our shared goals for having it?

Now to see if MSE likes data:

0

To give an idea what the presence/absence of HNQ does to a site, these are the Google analytics data for pageviews for IPS the last week: date page views visits new visits 2018-10-10 24496 9315 2718 2018-10-11 31098 11335 2748 2018-10-12 33044 12596 2781 2018...

3

5:48 PM

And well... in our culture, we're proud of our cooking XD

@Magisch critically though, you're trying to get data to make a decision.

and sometimes things still go horribly wrong

culturally here, you start with being friends, get to know each other, then maybe one thing leads to another

ya

I've shared that terribly designed webpage before XD

@JAD plus-one'd

but that's basically lead generation

the more data, the better- in general.

5:52 PM

yeah, i'm doing to install R to do some digging

Assuming someone gets back to us with a positive response, well... ya, you basically get to know each other (long distance) try to decide if you're a good fit...

going*

but first dinner

and its fundamentally different from how the last generation did it

@JAD Fuel for brainpower is good.

burrito's :D

5:53 PM

(so the calculations I made with the last girl we emailed? She's fairly cute. she shares a hometown with my mom. She's moved a lot. She's in an industry that's growing in singapore)

we're waiting to see if that finally results in a "Hi, lets talk"

hopefully things work out

I'm still trying to work out the process XD

but ya hopefully XD

I'm tired of sending emails to /dev/null XD

the process of emailing and such?

ya

phone calls generally work better

but I can't do it cause protocol

@JourneymanGeek May I ask what you send in your first message? I know that, depending of what you are saying your chance of success of having a response aren't the same

6:05 PM

@Noon my dad has a standard template meant for old people

but typically when we call folks, they haven't read the emails

Well then, I guess that trying to change the email won't change much :/

No

The IPS here is dealing with my parents and getting them engaged in the process XD

and finding someone who feels moving won't be a terrible idea

@JourneymanGeek Well then, maybe you can ask "How do I get my parent to be more engage in my dating process" :P

But yeah, I can see that people might not be very excited at the idea of moving :/

i thought there was a question you or someone else asked about it, was it removed?

6:27 PM

Ahh, okay

A: Revisiting the "Hot Network Questions" feature, what are our shared goals for having it?

6:54 PM

I added some more stuff

8

To give an idea what the presence/absence of HNQ does to a site, these are the Google analytics data for pageviews for IPS the last week: date page views visits new visits 2018-10-10 24496 9315 2718 2018-10-11 31098 11335 2748 2018-10-12 33044 12596 2781 2018...

@Noon (it was thrown here since it was a comment on an inactive post)

I guess I could generalize "huh?" just tell you why it was reported...

Well, this way I wouldn't look like a fool when using "huh?" on an inactive post report :P

gparyani

7:11 PM

@JourneymanGeek Why would you have to move to India?

7:32 PM

I know it's getting closer to the weekend but it's already feeling quieter. :/

@Noon :(

@JAD It was indeed for you but I had planned to write a message before you see it

@Noon just put in the pull request. For now you'll have to live with looking silly when you "huh?" inactive posts :p

I actually don't believe in what is written but I found it funny :p

7:35 PM

well, they in themselves don't say much, but if they are sufficiently small and high respectively, conclusions can't be drawn

@ElizB unsurprising, we lost 60%+ of traffic

this is the new normal

@JAD if you are talking about google analytics data from the reputation locked tools, I think it's not protected specifically

> Since this is a restricted privilege, we'd prefer you not share the raw data. However, we do hope you will share your analysis of the data with other users on meta. For instance, mature Stack Exchange sites tend to get the majority of their traffic from search engines (and particularly Google). Sharing the current percentage of traffic from search might shed some light on your site's particular strengths or weaknesses.

hmm

7:57 PM

Yeah, it really made me think- I commented this, it pretty much sums up my thoughts:
The only thought I have about this is that while it's good to step back and re-consider all of the elements involved in discussion about the HNQ, (while the first step was not done in the best way, I definitely agree) I feel like waiting for data to accumulate is putting Interpersonal Skills site in a "guinea pig" position, where we just wait and observe and hopefully it won't fade... I believe that's pretty harsh, and I want to see the site succeed but in a way that reflects all the other sites' methods (c…

@ElizB that's nice and all, but it seems a bit of a risky game to play just for a test

i'm reading the discussions and suggestions about the HNQ from 2015, 2016, 2017... trying to stay informed and gather my thoughts before speaking, so I don't make assumptions

normally, the effect of these kinds of features would be measured with an AB test or something like that. Show HNQ for some people, while hiding it for others, keeping track on how it affects their behaviour

an AB test?

Alpha/Beta, I think?

8:00 PM

nah

A/B testing

In web analytics, A/B testing (bucket tests or split-run testing) is a randomized experiment with two variants, A and B. It includes application of statistical hypothesis testing or "two-sample hypothesis testing" as used in the field of statistics. A/B testing is a way to compare two versions of a single variable, typically by testing a subject's response to variant A against variant B, and determining which of the two variants is more effective.As the name implies, two versions (A and B) are compared, which are identical except for one variation that might affect a user's behavior. Version...

Ah yeah, that makes more sense... >_>

Ahhh, gotcha

SE did A/B testing for the site layout redesign.

Mmmm. good to know.

9:02 PM

Seems like a good time for an actual mutiny, what do you all think?

Y'arrrr!

i would join if my sinus pressure would let up

Not that kind. The real sort.

We'll start our own SE-like site with HNQ and, um, hookers?

@El'endiaStarman Sure.

9:05 PM

(HNQ wouldn't even be useful without a network. :( )

@El'endiaStarman (could just query for SE network hot questions and add your own into the list)

But the whole point of HNQ is to show stuff to other sites, not just our own.

hehe, a bit like r/all

sounds good

Just venting a bit. Seems like every time a CM touches this stack they break things and aggravate folks. HNQ caused a lot of problems for us. I'm not sad that it's gone. Just wish the decision was made for better reasons.

Yeah, agreed. I'm relatively new here but i've read up on the discussions going on and i haven't even scratched the surface here... there's so much going on

9:10 PM

@apaul it's like IPS is a giant game of Jenga and the CM's have really bad hand tremors

jenga meets hot potato

Isn't that just an egg toss?^

@scohe001 speaking of which, at the students game club I attended in Uni, we had a game called electro jenga

where you pretty much attach electrodes to your hand, and each round increase the voltage :P

What the heck O_O Did it hurt?

it wasn't meant to

the electrodes were from a sex toy lol

but it makes your hand really twitchy

9:13 PM

giggles i'm not sure what to think of about that.... :P

it wasn't played much

was mostly a novelty thing

@JAD I don't think you're helping your case with making this any less weird lol

Sounds like something fun to try after a couple drinks

@scohe001 LOL

@scohe001 and to mess with freshmen

@scohe001 agreed.... :P

:(

9:22 PM

Lol messing with freshman is definitely the best

I have two perspectives on that.... the freshman's perspective, and the older students perspective...

That's what makes it the best!

tbh, for the rest, the club was very mild. not much drinking and such

It's a year of pain for three years of fun :p

no bullying freshmen

9:23 PM

that's good. :)

like... the majority didn't drink at all (no alcohol at least)

huh, that's cool. I was mostly buried in my books when all the partying going on because I went into a difficult science major

@SmokeDetector I'm guessing it triggered on protein

is there a lot of protein based spam on SE?

@spiralsucculent yeah, the fitness protein powder stuff

@SmokeDetector why

Q: How to overcome shyness at the gym and build my confidence?

9:31 PM

huh, TIL

Extroverted Main Man

0

I'v been on a diet for around 3 months now (since July) and I joined a gym around the same time. Since then, I've been having a lot of salads and in-taking more protein. I'm starting to see progress in my biceps and triceps but that's basically it. One of the biggest reasons is that everyone in ...

oh, it doesn't do that here apparently

@spiralsucculent oh, actually, it was 'weight loss' that triggered smokey

mmm, I guess "magic weight loss" is up there with "magic boners" in terms of spam topics

yep

@gparyani I think featured goes away automatically after a little more than a month

gparyani

9:36 PM

I know, but why re-feature it again?

I'd guess because the Sandbox has been useful and there's nothing else ever featured on our meta so it's not taking up the spot of something important on the featured list? Just my thoughts though

^

you want it to be visible and easily accessible

Q: How do I respond to a person that says they are everyone's scapegoat?

10:01 PM

posted a question related to the counseling meeting I had with my dad. My dad seems to be the source of my frustration.... oi.

Extroverted Main Man

0

TL;DR: My dad is an un-diagnosed very likely covert narcissist (not diagnosing him) and at the last counseling meeting, he declared that he felt that everyone made him the instant scapegoat. (which isnt't true, because from my perspective, it's self-inflicted). How do I respond to that statement...

conversations parents divorce narcissists

Q: Someone is mad at me for something I didn't consider rude when text messaging

There ya go, thanks Main Man!

Extroverted Main Man

11:21 PM

-1

There's a girl I kind of like and I sent her a text message saying I'm in her area and wondering if she's home. She said she's dealing with something and I replied 'k'. This seemed to upset her a lot and she sent me a bunch of messages saying how she's doing something important and I'm not the ce...

canada texting