The DMZ

No worries. It was just one of those conversations that just felt like someone would end up flag-bombing, and then we have a flood of blues and then it goes annoying for a while

I figured knocking it on the head early was easiest

Arperum

@RoryAlsop Or a flood of random 10k+ people all going "stop flagging ye crazies"

Simon

Remember when some dude named SimonEQ or something can in here because of a flag and then wanted me to change my name because he was getting ping'd?

Silly him.

Rоry McCune

@Simon someone with the power should super-ping him for lulz

Simon

Hehehe.

I wonder if I could find him somehow.

Arperum

3:10 PM

Ther's only one other simon who was active in chat the last day, and that was a code review moderator.

Simon

Yeah I can't find him at all.

He had a monkey or something as his gravatar, I believe that he came from The Bridge.

I think I remember seeing him with a new name too.

kalina

#nobodycares

Simon

Yeah, you're not wrong.

kalina

one simon is too many simons

don't induce nightmares by discussing a second

Arperum

@Simon I don't think so, can't remember any simons over there.

Simon

3:13 PM

Imagine two #me!

OH MY GOD

I'M GONNA HAVE A KID AND CREATE A MINI ME

kalina

I can't believe somebody as perverted as you hasn't commented on the conversation from this morning

Simon

wot

kalina

I bet you read it and got to the part where lighty said it wasn't possible for the human body to bend like that and then went all quiet because you agreed with him

Simon

???????

kalina

I know, I'm a mind reader

Arperum

3:14 PM

Seems like I missed nothign I didn't want to miss.

Simon

I didn't agree with Lighty this morning.

kalina

well of course not, it was the afternoon by the time you read it

Simon

wat

kalina

ya

Simon

I DID NOT READ ANYTHING

kalina

3:15 PM

well that's obvious

Simon

I rarely scroll back to catch on discussions.

kalina

why, are our pre-simon discussions not worthy of your attention?

Simon

It depends if someone ping'd me, I might read a bit.

Otherwise, nopeeeee

kalina

that removes all the fun

basically, we concluded that the most productive position in bed is on your back with your legs next to your ears

Arperum

@Simon SO we need to insert random pings to @sim?

kalina

3:17 PM

and lighty said "that's not possible, the human body doesn't bend like that" or something to that effect

and then we all made fun of him for a bit

I guess you had to be there

Simon

@kalina wtf

kalina

what

I know, it's incredible that @AviD ever puts the room into timeout

Simon

That's indeed quite productive when there's a ween involved but that's another story.

kalina

@Simon no that was the exact story

Simon

O

bahahaha

Silly Lighty.

kalina

3:18 PM

"on back, legs next to ears, and somebody who knows what they're doing between"

poor lighty

Simon

Oh please, you barely need to know what you're doing to pull that off.

kalina

@Simon in order for it to be productive it has to be good

speaking of lighty I watched this movie called 40 year old virgin the other day

Simon

LOL

Lighty: "I live for missionary"

Rоry McCune

now now you two, no need to be cruel

kalina

#boring

Rоry McCune

3:20 PM

@kalina with you, more likely #bored

we could play the "lets guess @kalina 's DJ name" game again if you like :)

Simon

DJ SDA

kalina

missionary is a great opportunity to ignore what's going on and play games on your phone

Simon

(Smack dat ass)

kalina

oh no, simon found me out

#theend

time for suicides

#simonsays jump off a bridge and die

Simon

pls

M'vy

3:22 PM

yah whatev. Even if we miraculously happen to be true, we wouldn't be able to be sure and are most likely to discard our solutions anyway.

kalina

well that's assuming you haven't already been correct

M'vy

true

but the point still stands

Rоry McCune

@M'vy well there's only so many female Dance DJs in France...

kalina

I like how you capitalize Dance but not France

Simon

I cannot name a single female French DJ/producer, actually.

Rоry McCune

3:24 PM

@kalina meh, typing is hard

kalina

THERE'S ONLY SO MANY rories IN scotland

Rоry McCune

@kalina unfortunately true the number of rories is finite

kalina

that and you're all just @RoryAlsop from one of his earlier visits

Simon

oi look at meh am a rorey

M'vy

Wot?

Simon

3:28 PM

wot lad u got a problem u wanka

kalina

am yo oroight cockas

Rоry McCune

@Simon wrong country

@kalina I'm guessing that "Juicy M" is not your DJ name

Simon

OH PLEASE

JUICY M IS A TALENTLESS DONUT

kalina

@RоryMcCune you are certainly 100% correct in that

Simon

I've censored myself.

kalina

3:29 PM

currently unsure if Simon is sticking up for me or not

I think his massively negative reaction to said individual is hilarious either way

Simon

"oi am a superstar dj but i aint producin' yo"

kalina

easy to rise to the top with frequent fellatio

Simon

Indeed.

kalina

sadly if I were willing to suck more dick I'd be much further along than I am currently

Simon

Me too.

kalina

3:33 PM

then again you only need to google for "armin van buuren ghost writer" and you realize that's basically what everybody else does

not that I'm publicly dissing an artist far further up the ladder than I

"I've never used a ghost producer, I can firmly say that" he says

AviD

Sing Talk (Tik Tok Parody)

►

kalina

and then you get a list of artists who have written tracks for him, had their name removed from the credits and replaced with his

Simon

He's been around for quite a while, I wouldn't expect him to have a ghost producer though.

AviD

yes, I am here once in a while.

kalina

@Simon most of the top 25 at least do

Simon

3:35 PM

Of course, music industry is not about art anymore, it's all about the monies.

da monies da fame da bitches

kalina

pls the only bitch I need in my life is myself

Simon

o

Nate Kerkhofs

Delicate topic: genders in an email. I received a mail from someone whose gender is unclear and I'm not sure whether to guess one, use both forms or just say "Hello"

Simon

@NateKerkhofs Are you supposed to know the gender, though?

If you're not supposed to know, I'd use both which would encourage the person to precise their gender in the following email.

AviD

@NateKerkhofs English is easy, there is barely any genderisms in first or 2nd person.

Nate Kerkhofs

3:41 PM

@Simon It's a job interview invite, from someone named "Raya"

Simon

@NateKerkhofs Eeeeehhhhh.

AviD

@NateKerkhofs use gender neutral 100% of the time.

Nate Kerkhofs

I want to reply that I'm available. So just Hello?

AviD

in that situation, you should do that even if you do know the gender.

@NateKerkhofs where is the gender coming in to play?

I mean, what are you possibly saying in that context that gender would be relevant?

Rоry McCune

@AviD well unless you're going formal in british english, in which case "hello" in a job thing might be a bit overly familiar :op

Nate Kerkhofs

3:43 PM

@AviD in the opener for the mail, like the first line. I don't want to step on any toes. Also, it's not English, it's Dutch

Simon

Yeah I agree that "hello" is too familiar.

AviD

@RоryMcCune I meant, "do that" == "use gender neutral 100% of the time"

@NateKerkhofs what first line would have the gender??

"Hello Darling,"

Rоry McCune

@AviD well in old-school british english something "Dear Sir" would've been appropriate

Nate Kerkhofs

@AviD "Dear Sir/Madam"

Simon

@AviD "Ms. Raya,"

AviD

3:44 PM

ahhhh

Simon

(Or actually their last name)

AviD

@Simon yes this would be better

or, "Raya, "

Nate Kerkhofs

or translated: "Dag mevrouw (lastname)", but I don't want to accidentally call a man a woman or vice versa

AviD

ahhh okay gotcha.

Simon

I'd be really tempted to reply with their last name, which seems to be more polite to me but yeah the gender question screws it up.

AviD

3:45 PM

is there a genderless form of Mr. in Dutch?

Nate Kerkhofs

I mean, she addressed me in the contact mail as "Dag Nate," (Hello Nate)

but I'm not sure whether going that familiar from the start is a good idea

Simon

You're meant to be the most polite one though, I believe.

AviD

@Simon this is for a job interview. Last names create too much distance.

Too formal.

Rоry McCune

@AviD depends on the company

AviD

@NateKerkhofs absolutely. Its a job interview.

Simon

3:46 PM

wat

AviD

@Simon polite, yes. Being overly formal and creating distance can be impolite.

Nate Kerkhofs

@AviD There isn't really a genderless form in Dutch

Simon

@AviD WAT

HOW DOES THAT WORK?

AviD

then again, this is of course culture-specific.

Nate Kerkhofs

I really don't think going "Dag Raya" in my second message to the company (first was the application) is a good idea

Simon

3:48 PM

Why not "Mr. or Ms. LastName"?

Rоry McCune

@AviD and being overly familiar with someone you don't know can also be impolite, as you say culture-specific

Simon

Or Ms. or Mr. if you're old fashion.

Rоry McCune

@Simon the key is that @NateKerkhofs doesn't know the gender of the person in question

AviD

@Simon "Good morning, Ms.Donut. I would like to take this opportunity to discuss with you the large quantity of food containers, in our mutual kitchen-style area. "

Simon

@RоryMcCune Yes so literally go with "Ms. or Mr. LastName".

Rоry McCune

3:49 PM

@Simon ooh no that would be bad

to me

AviD

@Simon omg that is so awful.

Simon

wat

You guys suck IRL and especially in-game.

AviD

if I got that, I would blacklist the company

@Simon lol

Simon

IF YOUR NAME IS FYAD78FTSDYF87DSTF8SD7FTSDAF7 YOU SHOULDN'T EXPECT THE WORLD TO KNOW YOUR GENDER

Rоry McCune

@Simon pls somon how many recruitment campaigns have you run...

AviD

3:49 PM

@NateKerkhofs ah, you're applying to them. So go nameless...

Simon

Roro, you know what the answer is.

It's forty-two.

AviD

something like "Thank you, I appreciate you getting back to me."

or "Raya, blablabal".

@Simon YOUR GENDER SHOULDNT MATTER REGARDLESS OF WHAT YOUR NAME IS

@Simon what are you, the TSA?

Simon

IT SOUNDS MUCH BETTER WHEN YOU CAN REPLY MR OR MS LAST NAME TO ME

AviD

thats cuz you suck.

Simon

Fine, I got it, start with: "pls,".

AviD

3:52 PM

ahem, "pls donut,"

kalina

@NateKerkhofs so just go with Good <Time of day> <firstname>,

4

AviD

@kalina yes, seomthing like that. Leave the gender-specificity out of it.

Simon

That works too but I don't like using the first name

And using the last name without the gender doesn't work.

kalina

if the email is addressed you to exclusively, first name is entirely appropriate if it appears in their email signature

M'vy

have you tried google + company name ?

TildalWave

3:54 PM

what's wrong with "to whom it may concern..."?

AviD

Or, go with something creative: "BARNEY STINSON F*KIN AWESOME, I look forward to meeting you."

kalina

@TildalWave inappropriate for an email addressed to you?

Simon

@TildalWave Now that'd be way too formal, considering he has the person's name.

AviD

@Simon that's rude.

TildalWave

@kalina but you're likely addressing a position in some company more than some individual employed in it

kalina

3:55 PM

@TildalWave not if an individual has emailed you

AviD

@TildalWave he is replying to an email sent to him.

Simon

How the fuck did we manage to create such a mess with this?

kalina

because you're all idiots

Simon

pls donut,

kalinuh pls stop.

pls,

kalina

bunch of intelligent people arguing over how to start an email

TildalWave

3:55 PM

Sure, from what address? I mean, if the email address is personalized then yes, go with the name. If it isn't, go with general position.

Simon

simon

Rоry McCune

@Simon yep that's you

kalina

did you just call me your donut?

how does your donut feel about this?

Rоry McCune

@kalina he did, I noticed that

AviD

yeah, its overly complicated.

Simon

3:56 PM

I DID NOT SAY "MY DONUT"

kalina

does she know you're a two donut kind of guy?

Simon

NO I'M NOT

AviD

remember, you might be working with these people, it damn well better be comfortable.

TildalWave

@AviD "dear sir and/or madam" :))

Rоry McCune

@Simon "pls donut, kalinuh"

if you take out the newline that's what you said

Nate Kerkhofs

3:56 PM

The company website doesn't give any help

kalina

that's like he's asking me to please be his donut

Simon

SHE'S A DONUT BUT SHE'S NOT MY DONUT

AviD

@TildalWave I refer you to the "you suck" messages we wrote to @Simon when he suggested that.

kalina

@NateKerkhofs "Good <time of day> <name>,"

6

Rоry McCune

@Simon oh man you're in trouble next time @kalina is playing that club in quebec she's played before

AviD

3:57 PM

@kalina this, now everybody shut up about it.

Simon

@RоryMcCune She hasn't played in a damn club here.

Nate Kerkhofs

I googled the name, and I got even more confused due to an obituary where they are in a relationship with what appears to be a woman, which means they're more likely to be a man these days

kalina

screw it, respond with "hoi lieverd, " and finish the email with "xoxox"

TildalWave

@AviD I don't think you got my meaning :P

Simon

@NateKerkhofs looool

Rоry McCune

3:58 PM

@Simon pls she knew the capacity without looking it up, you only know that if you've been there or played there

AviD

@TildalWave I think I did

Simon

@RоryMcCune She said she did look it up.

Rоry McCune

@Simon post hoc rationalisation

Simon

You're a ration.

TildalWave

@AviD "it's too complicated" ... "yes, not only don't you know the person's gender, you can't even be sure that person has one, or one single one for the matter"

thus "and/or" duh!

AviD

3:59 PM

@TildalWave well they might be a hive mind.

kalina

@Simon one ration of rory

Nate Kerkhofs

I think I might just go for "Beste". It's somewhat old fashioned, but it's gender neutral

kalina

well what was the point in asking us then

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