English Language & Usage: Multi-Layered Discourse Room

Jez

22:17

what did you lot think of the Assange speech today?

Cerberus

22:38

Hello.

I'm back.

And it's still freaking hot.

tchrist

22:49

@Cerberus Where in the world are you?

Schiphol has 72, although the 82% humidity must be miserable. Is it raining?

Cerberus

@tchrist Amsterdam.

Remember, the city is much warmer than a random airfield.

tchrist

I’d’ve supposed it’d’ve been somewhat warmer.

Cerberus

And the city centre is warmer again than the neighbourhood slightly outside the centre proper, where I was having a beer an hour ago.

tchrist

You’re hot from drinking then.

Cerberus

Then it is much warmer inside than outside.

tchrist

22:54

I can’t find anything in the area that’s even 80.

Cerberus

No, it's not the drink.

tchrist

Inside doesn’t count.

Cerberus

My thermometre says it is 27 °C inside. But I don't trust it: it is probably warmer.

tchrist

Scroll down to the "Weather Stations" portion.

Cerberus

Yes, that is the weather-station temperature.

tchrist

22:55

So?

Cerberus

But one can feel the bricks and stones radiating heat here.

tchrist

I find 80 to be plenty hot at 82% humidity and dead air. I find 100 to be plenty cool in 2% humidity with a breeze.

Cerberus

At the country house, sitting nearer to the walls was much hotter than sitting a few paces away on the grass.

Indeed: air temperature at some random place several km away says very little about how hot it actually feels, which is what matters.

tchrist

I see no evidence that it was ever within a country mile of body temperature there.

Cerberus

It was 34 °C this afternoon.

tchrist

22:57

I am not saying you are not hot.

Cerberus

Thanks.

I'm not calling you unhot either.

tchrist

As you say.

Cerberus

weatherspark.com/#!dashboard;q=Amsterdam%2C%20Netherlands

tchrist

It is perfectly pleasant here. A lovely 80, which is warmer than anywhere in Amsterdam right now. Our humidity though is < 20%, which makes a great deal of difference.

Cerberus

Quite so.

And being sweaty from the day also makes it feel hotter.

Excusez le mot.

tchrist

22:59

Interesting.

Cerberus

weatherspark.com/#!dashboard;a=Netherlands/Nijverdal

This is where I was earlier today.

It says 33 °C.

tchrist

It seems to say it has been 90 there, but that today is has only ever been 74.

Cerberus

?

tchrist

See, 72 is nothing to get all hot and bothered over.

Cerberus

How come your graph looks different?

tchrist

23:02

I have no idea.

Cerberus

Again, the temperature at some airfield may be 22 °C now, but...

tchrist

That is the link you gave me.

I have touched nothing.

Look at the graph.

It never got above 74.

According to that graph.

Cerberus

Uh.

Green is tomorrow.

Look at the black.

The vertical line is now.

tchrist

Why would it say today then?

Cerberus

Because your time zone is different.

tchrist

23:04

Um, so?

The black says 89.

Cerberus

Yes.

tchrist

That’s warm, sure.

Don’t see how that would change what today is.

Wasn’t today Sunday for you?

Cerberus

Yes.

Well, technically, no.

Informally, yes.

tchrist

Is History the historical plot for this day?

Cerberus

The vertical line is now.

Do you see it?

tchrist

23:06

Yes.

It says it is 75 at 1am.

Cerberus

Yes.

tchrist

You must be suffering from the oppressive humidity.

Cerberus

Oh, I am.

But the sun is what matters.

tchrist

I can’t sleep well when it is like that.

Cerberus

Air temperature matters much less.

We call it the copper brute.

It hates us.

It shines its evil rays upon us.

tchrist

23:08

Still, you never get very hot there.

Cerberus

Taunting us, torturing us.

tchrist

Nor the sun very high.

You are twelve degrees above me.

I don’t know what that is in metric though.

You are at 52, and I am at 40.

So your sun will be lower.

Cerberus

My friend says Mexico City is always much better than here today. He lived there for a year or so.

tchrist

Of course it is.

We had 105 this summer.

We had two weeks over 90, and like five days over 100.

Cerberus

Your cities are probably built to withstand hear. You have air conditioning and such.

tchrist

23:09

I’m afraid your kind of people would die.

Cities?

Cerberus

We should indeed.

Your cities and your other buildings.

tchrist

People have swamp coolers.

I have a ceiling fan going right now.

But the house is open, because it is pleasant.

Cerberus

I have nothing, except this stupid mobile a/c thing that I don't feel is helping much.

tchrist

I cannot tolerate humidity.

Oh, you can’t have swamp coolers, can you?

Cerberus

I wish it were freezing.

I don't know, I have never seen a swamp cooler.

tchrist

23:11

Evaporative cooler

An evaporative cooler (also swamp cooler, desert cooler, and wet air cooler) is a device that cools air through the evaporation of water. Evaporative cooling differs from typical air conditioning systems which use vapor-compression or absorption refrigeration cycles. Evaporative cooling works by employing water's large enthalpy of vaporization. The temperature of dry air can be dropped significantly through the phase transition of liquid water to water vapor (evaporation), which can cool air using much less energy than refrigeration. In extremely dry climates, evaporative cooling of ...

It was freezing yesterday when I was at 14 kilofeet.

Cerberus

Nice.

tchrist

Actually, it wasn’t freezing. Just in the 50s.

Felt freezing.

Cerberus

I want that.

Nao.

And heavy rain, I want that most of all.

tchrist

Why in the name of all that’s holy would you want to be any wetter?

Your clothes would stick to you.

Cerberus

Rain brings relief from the heat.

We do have umbrellae here.

Or is it umbrelle?

tchrist

23:14

We call them raincoats.

Cerberus

I don't own such a contraption.

tchrist

Those effete urban poofter sticks are useless.

Cerberus

They are great!

We use them all the time, when cycling, etc.

tchrist

What about rain that comes from where it is not pointing?

CYCLING?

You are clearly hallucinating.

Cerberus

One disregards such rain, pretends it does not exists.

tchrist

23:15

Have you been drinking tequila?

Cerberus

Pourquoi?

I always cycle with an umbrella if I have one.

tchrist

And how can you hold a poofter strick when the wind is blowing a mile a minute?

Cerberus

And if it is raining.

tchrist

That is insane.

Umbrellas are for little hold ladies, not cyclists.

Just wear rainpants.

Cerberus

If the wind is extreme, which is rare, the umbrella becomes a bit of a problem. One's speed will be greatly diminished.

Rainpants!?

tchrist

23:16

And a rainjacket.

And you become impervious.

Cerberus

Um, how is that in any way, shape, or form fashionable?

tchrist

Fashionawhat?

Cerberus

Besides, I usually get wetter from rainpants than without.

I used to wear rainpants and coat when cycling to school as a child.

tchrist

Maybe you need to wear gators. Are you fording cricks?

Cerberus

It was terrible.

I would be soaking wet with ehm, you know.

tchrist

23:18

What does fashionable have to do with the price of tea in china?

Cerberus

I would rather take the tram than wear ugly clothes.

tchrist

Humid air means your body cannot cool itself.

What, are you going clubbing or something?

Cerberus

And I would much rather use an umbrella, which works fine against medium rain for short rides/walks.

tchrist

We need to get you out on a ranch in Wyoming or Arizona for a few nice summer months.

Cerberus

I would rather visit the bottom of the sea.

Is it possible to shudder from heat?

Or is that from revulsion?

tchrist

23:20

Your body is not working right.

Cerberus

Hmm, what was that? I missed it.

tchrist

Good.

Cerberus

Why?

Was it lewd?

Heh.

I saw that one.

tchrist

They wouldn’t want to mess up their coiffure.

cornbread ninja

Dangit!

I was reading this novel about weather.

Cerberus

23:22

Here, most people wouldn't want to be going to various appointments wearing ugly clothes.

tchrist

It says not to hold up a lightning rod during a storm.

Ugly clothes?

@cornbreadninja Just bizarre.

Cerberus

Like this.

tchrist

Function first.

Cerberus

I think some people I know might wear these. Most wouldn't.

tchrist

You wear what you need to wear.

Or die.

Here, come backpacking with me in the mountains for three days — without raingear.

Cerberus

23:23

Arg! I do hope you're not an architectural functionalist...

tchrist

That will teach you the meaning of hypothermia.

Cerberus

Backpacking?

cornbread ninja

puts baggies over socks

tchrist

I trust you are familiar with the term.

Cerberus

I'm going about my stuff in a city, not backpacking.

Your trust is not misplaced.

tchrist

23:24

I don’t wear rainpants in town, but I might if it were snowing or raining hard.

Cerberus

If I were going on some expedition, I would wear whatever I must.

But I'm not.

tchrist

But it would be folly to go about without a raincoat if a downpour is called for — no matter where you are.

Cerberus

An umbrella is good enough.

90 % of the time.

tchrist

The only people I ever see here with umbrellas is little old ladies. Truly.

I can take pictures if you would like.

Cerberus

Then come to Amsterdam.

tchrist

23:26

The Asian ones use them for sun, too.

Too effete for me.

Cerberus

Or anywhere in Europe, probably.

I have never been to a place where everybody wasn't wearing umbrelle when it was raining.

This is an interesting Atlantic divide.

I didn't know this was a cultural difference to consider.

tchrist

Oh, it sounds very Haute Couture Manhattan.

I’m sure the Very Important City People use them.

But I certainly have never owned one in my entire life.

If it’s going to rain, I bring a raincoat: I am no fool.

Cerberus

Funny.

Everybody uses umbrellas here, all across the continent.

tchrist

Everyone I know owns stuff like this:

altrec.com/columbia/jackets/rain-jackets

Cerberus

By no means limited to cities.

tchrist

23:30

It is how you are supposed to deal with rain.

Cerberus

Oh, dear.

Yes, I have seen many of those.

But they're not very city-like.

tchrist

"City-like"?

Don’t understand. At. All.

Cerberus

I mean, I don't think many people who live in the city wear such raincoats.

tchrist

Then they are stoopeed.

Next you'll tell me they don’t wear shorts or sandals, either.

No wonder you are too hot.

Cerberus

Many people do where shorts.

Sandals, perhaps very fashionable ones—but they are a bit of a problem.

Flip-flops, rather.

tchrist

23:32

It is a natural reaction to the perception of heat.

Cerberus

I don't wear either.

tchrist

Flip-flops are for fops.

They are useless.

Cerberus

Some people wear the abominable Birkenstocks.

tchrist

I don’t care for Birkenstocks myself.

Wouldn’t own them.

Cerberus

Like these.

tchrist

23:34

I only wear Tevas and the like.

Cerberus

Blerg.

tchrist

How embarrassing!

Those are hideous!

Cerberus

@tchrist Then at last we have found something to agree on!

tchrist

And nonfunctional.

You cannot run in them.

You cannot hike uphill in them.

Cerberus

These are the only Birkenstocks most people would consider.

If any.

tchrist

23:35

They have no soles.

Cerberus

Of course not.

tchrist

I want to lose my supper.

Useless crap.

Cerberus

I think most people would wear more sporty clothes and shoes if they went hiking uphill or playing tennis or whatever.

tchrist

But how will you know whether you are going to need not to fall over?

Cerberus

Ask any random woman.

tchrist

23:38

Almost everyone wears either this style or this one.

I don’t talk to random women.

Cerberus

Oh, God.

tchrist

But if I did, what would they know about it?

I talk to specific women.

Cerberus

I'm afraid I would not wear such shoes.

tchrist

Random seems too perilous.

Well, that’s what everyone wears for sandals.

Cerberus

@tchrist Any specific woman will have been a random woman first.

tchrist

23:39

Your mother?

Cerberus

I would never wear sandals anyway.

My mother as well.

tchrist

Was she ever a random woman to you?

Cerberus

My mother would normally wear something like penny loafers or something.

To me, no; to the universe, yes.

tchrist

Merrells are very popular here.

Cerberus

What I meant was that most women seem to care little about comfort.

tchrist

23:41

@Cerberus My perception is the other way around.

Cerberus

I remember carrying a friend home when her feet were bleeding in her pumps worse than normal.

@tchrist ...

tchrist

PUMPS? WTbloodyF?

I know no one, male or female, who is that stupid.

That, or something rather like it, is what are on my feet right now.

Cerberus

Most women wear medium to high heels here most days.

tchrist

You are on drugs.

Cerberus

On social occasions at least.

tchrist

23:43

You are still on drugs.

It is extremely rare.

Cerberus

Perhaps from the marijuana smoke from the street.

tchrist

Does marijuana cause hallucination?

Cerberus

If you go to any terrace or bar here where there aren't many tourists, you will see tons of high heels.

tchrist

Never.

That’s . . . icky.

Cerberus

Oh, come on, I'll buy you a beer.

It'll be fun.

tchrist

23:44

Only Britain or Belgium, perhaps.

Cerberus

What do you have against high heels?

tchrist

The rest of Europe makes flaccid placid beers of no character.

Cerberus

You have no idea. We have so many beers.

tchrist

High heels are super super stupid.

You ruin your feet, your back.

Do you wear them?????

Cerberus

A good beer bar café will have hundreds of beers, from white to dark to anything.

@tchrist I am a man, not a girl.

tchrist

23:46

I rest my case.

Cerberus

But many of my friends often do.

tchrist

High heels would be as out of place here as in a cowboy Western.

A woman who wears high heels probably paints herself, too.

It is a very unpleasant image.

Cerberus

Almost every single woman here use some kind of war paint, yes.

Most likely mascara.

tchrist

Fakery.

Not my kind of girl.

Those ones that paint themselves are available by the hour.

Not a real person, though.

Cerberus

You sound like an Ayatollah!

tchrist

23:50

No, just a regular guy.

Cerberus

Serious question: can you actually tell whether a girl uses mascara?

I don't think I could.

tchrist

If I can, I wouldn’t like it.

Why should she wear that crud if you don’t?

I don’t understand.

Cerberus

Makes her eyes look bigger.

@tchrist The idea is that you can't.

tchrist

I’m sure it would make your eyes look bigger too.

Cerberus

I don't need that.

tchrist

23:52

In case you haven’t figured it out yet, I despise urbane city-dwelling lifestyles.

Cerberus

Gosh.

I had no dea.

So what do you think of this girl?

Ugly make-up?

tchrist

She has a black eye, the poor thing.

2

Cerberus

Hahaha.

Two black eyes, then.

tchrist

Yes.

Cerberus

But +1 for you.

tchrist

23:53

Looks like a stage queen.

Cerberus

This is about the average amount of mascara girls wear here, I think. Perhaps a tiny bit more than that. But I sort of agree that less is better on most girls.

This mascara is about average.

The lipstick is normal, though a significant number will wear none at all. Not so with the lipstick.

You consider them all call girls?

Does your mother use no make-up at all?

tchrist

That’s a random street shot during summer.

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