I've since edited https://interpersonal.stackexchange.com/q/6672/2423 since its closure, in incorporating the suggestions in the comments. Anything else to clarify?
In the body, I explain how each of all the possible answers aren't tactful.
i work in consulting so i'm frequently at a client site all day long. it's embarrassing that my guy friend who is pursuing me sends me the eggplant emoji and my client sees it pop up on my iphone. it's really inappropriate when it's done during work hours but i'm not sure how to tell him to sto...
Every year I make a photo calendar and distribute it to my extended family.
The nuclear family's birthdays have always gone on, as has an ever-increasing number of birthdays in the extended family, which is rapidly becoming more and more multigenerational.
Recently, we had a discussion about wh...
My wife and I have a 2.5 year old. Since she was born, my wife has been on various trips with either friends or her family (who live overseas) with the child, while I stay home at work, or to catch up on the holiday later when I was able. I've never complained or denied that she should go and enj...
If you felt you were being punished by a group of people (a social network) for an unknown offense, how would you solve the conflict? Added complications are: 1) When you confront any of the individuals and ask if you did anything wrong they assure you that you did not. The punishment and rude be...
How to explain tactfully that someone has misrepresented you?
Was closed for over a month, was never improved. It was manually deleted because it has answers, so the automatic clean-up job won't pick this up.
Now, I see it has been undeleted. Why? The question can't be reopened like this.
It...
I've heard the word "queer" being used to describe a subset (I guess) of the gay and lesbian population. When I think of "queer" I think of the stereotypical characteristics of a sissy.
I think the term is being used as an attempt to shock people, but I just think it sounds stupid. Also, I'm n...
How to explain tactfully that someone has misrepresented you?
Was closed for over a month, was never improved. It was manually deleted because it has answers, so the automatic clean-up job won't pick this up.
Now, I see it has been undeleted over a month after being deleted, but without being ...
How do I tell other gay people that they sound stupid calling themselves "queer"?
I think this is another example of the chiming in, that I mentioned here: Could we be a little better about not chiming in?
The question asker seemed to have a legitimate issue with a word being applied to him and...
This specific question is in the curious position of being deleted without being closed. It used to be closed as a dupe, but this was disputed in the comments:
Is this really a duplicate? The question linked is about a private, one-on-one conversation. This one is about groups and I imagine i...
How do I tell other gay people that they sound stupid calling themselves "queer"?
I think this is another example of the chiming in, that I mentioned here: Could we be a little better about not chiming in?
The question asker seemed to have a legitimate issue with a word being applied to him and...
This specific question is in the curious position of being deleted without being closed. It used to be closed as a dupe, but this was disputed in the comments:
Is this really a duplicate? The question linked is about a private, one-on-one conversation. This one is about groups and I imagine i...
@Tinkeringbell I recently direct msgd my pen pal in Instagram something like "oh, you're growing fat", which in my place is like something friends tell each other for no reason and it's always as a joke. Unfortunately it kinda upset my pen pal from Netherlands. Uh. Bad day for NVZ
@Tinkeringbell Here in the US at least, you've gotta be caaaareful when making a joke like that. Between very specific kinds of friends it wouldn't be offensive, but between most people it would.
Oooh, it's a she? :P That's baaaad! :P No, you can make them here too, but it's generally something for family or very good friends... I think it's the fact that you're 'just' a pen-pal..
@Tinkeringbell yeah that's something I should've considered. Pen pals don't always get the visual context like real friends around me do.
@JarkoDubbeldam I think that's possible. She's a football player. And honestly she does look a little fat in recent insta posts. Anyways, I've said sorry.
Because our societies - at least the one I live in - assign an undue degree of import around a woman's appearance, and it places an undue emphasis within that context on weight, and the 'idealized' weight that they're all expected to live up to is an unreasonable one that's not necessarily possible for all people and isn't even healthy for most...and is very difficult to attain for most who can do it.
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Or maybe that's just the US, but I get the impression that it's even worse in many places. ^.^,
This recent question has made me wonder if maybe we should delete a tag if the only question/s it points to have been heavily down voted and/or closed:
How do I tell other gay people that they sound stupid calling themselves "queer"?, resulting in this somewhat lacking page: https://interpersona...
politeness and rudeness seem like the same domain approached from opposite sides. If somebody asks "is doing X considered polite in (context)?" he'll probably tag it "politeness", but if he asks "would it be rude to X in (context)?" he'll probably tag it "rudeness". A future visitor using tags ...
@TheTinyMan true, all that. my pal, though, being a football player; she's not really fat at all. that's the whole joke. it's like telling a long lost friend, "oh, man, you're so big and fat now". but anyways. it's done and done.
I posted an answer to the question
How to convince my parents I’m happy with my social life? and it seems the answer was deleted.
I received an email notifying me that there were comments, but my inbox doesn’t show any. Plus there’s no notification or anything letting me know what happened to m...
As an individual who is not okay with the word 'queer' being used to describe me, what is the most socially acceptable and sensitive way to communicate that to individuals who are?
To rephrase - if I am in a social situation with casual acquaintances or friends who use the word 'queer', how can...
@TheTinyMan In my experience, conversations about weight have almost always been focused around an individuals health and not appearance. Sure, objectification exists in plenty, but I have hardly met anyone that doesn't actively shun the idea
Weight is something my decisions have a control over - my lifestyle affects it. It's not the same case for all, though. So I for one would actually welcome feedback on things I do have a control over, so that I can improve my self.
Lets go to the facts first.
Let's call my close friend Bob, and his ex-girlfriend Jane.
Me and Jane go way before I meet Bob. Actually, she presented me to him.
Since then, we became really close friends, at the point of starting a business together.
I have known Jane since high school, but ...
@TheTinyMan woah, a lot of words out there. I think that makes sense. I'm only sexually attracted to women. But I have man crushes on some men, bromances, etc while there's nothing sexual about it.
@Catija Which, honestly, makes English even weirder...although I think most languages have tiny little things that completely change the meaning of a predicate
From A Moose, Some Silly Putty... And A Desperate Plea For Help, I "collected" some hats made by members of this community, just for the record.
I may not have found all of them, so feel free to add the ones I missed by editing this post...
Catija
Tinkeringbell
HDE 226868
Monica Cellio
AJ
Mysel...
https://interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/1814/381
While I am not exactly proud of this early answer I wrote 4 months ago, OP found it useful and accepted it 2 days ago.
My answer had scored exactly +2 -2 = 0 in 4 months but got heavily downvoted to +5 -12 = -7 today after it was accepted by OP...
@Sid I've definitely known some kids where the much-espoused 'nice' methods that I'd heard was less than effective. Of course...so were the 'mean' ones that the parents were willing to apply.
When somebody asks a question that i do not feel like answering, or is just annoying me with questions, how to i politely decline a question in a friendly manner?
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I was thinking about the phrase 'young padawan,' and it seemed to me to be a permanent part of Star Wars lore. Yet, I definitely remember being into Star Wars well before the prequels, while I just re-watched the original trilogy and don't remember hearing the term padawan anywhere. There are mul...
was there ever a question on here about giving handmade gifts? I could have sworn there was but search isn't turning up anything, so maybe I'm just imagining things :P