The Awkward Silence

Catija

00:47

So, this has no location and no close votes. Anyone have any idea why?

10

Q: Why are people unwilling to share information about their salary?

Reading this question i was surprised that it seems to be common sense that people do not want to share this information and might even get upset, if someone asks them how much they earn. Is this related to culture? (I am a young german student/intern, maybe that is related to the fact that I do ...

Gypsy Spellweaver

01:09

:39477126 It _does_ have a location:
    _I am a young german student/intern_

Gypsy Spellweaver

01:30

Any ideas what other tags might be useful for this one? It has no context tags, but it's not limited to a region either.

0

Q: How to deal with people whose English is not good enough to be understandable

So I develop plugins as a hobby for just over two years now (nothing professional). I've posted one plugin online on a forum for everyone to use. Note that this forum has a rule stating you should write in English. While it's not that big of a deal if you don't, it has basically become a standard...

conversations language

Beofett

01:41

@RoryAlsop You're a great mod. Parenting is definitely... contentious. Speaking of which, I still owe you an apology for how I left. Sorry that I had that... meltdown. It wasn't fair of me at all.

Gypsy Spellweaver

02:12

@EnglishStudent I think it's time to clean up our comments on your question. They have served their purpose and now qualify as "noise" to the real issue.

Sad to say, with my limited understanding of the situation, your friend's best choice might be to do nothing. The husband's temperament along with social and religious pressures makes it seem that anything he does could be detrimental to her marriage, social status, and maybe even her safety.

Is this acceptable for here?

-2

A: How can I tell non-parents, "Wait and see until you have kids" without being cliché and obnoxious?

Don't. Don't tell them a thing. Don't inform them, don't educate them, don't enlighten them. I know you (and countless others) will disagree with me, but you, yourself, lack perspective: your generation is one wholly without challenge. You weren't challenged in school to spell words correctly...

@John ^^

English Student

02:36

Your point is well taken, @GypsySpellweaver -- that is exactly my friend's fear and that is exactly what the single, excellent answer by anongoodnurse suggests. I was thinking that somebody would post another valid perspective as an answer. The comments section will be cleared shortly.

Catija

@GypsySpellweaver no. It says where they are from. The question it refers to is in the UK.

Gypsy Spellweaver

@Catija I have concerns about an answer on the site. Posted just above.

Catija

02:50

@GypsySpellweaver I don't have enough concern to delete it without consulting other mods.

Gypsy Spellweaver

@Catija Fair enough. Just seemed to be a bit rough on the OP, assuming that, based on age, the OP was a second class citizen somehow.

Catija

@GypsySpellweaver Strong wording, sure. But deleting it or getting bothered by it sort of proves the point. Sometimes hearing things that make you uncomfortable is good. Lets you really think about whether they are true or not. I know my generation hasn't had to deal with nearly as much crap as people my age 30 or 50 or 70 years ago... the piddly things we fret over are nothing by comparison.

English Student

03:20

Be sure not to delete it, @Catija - for all the reasons you noted here, but also for the eloquence and feeling that distinguish its writing. It is obviously not aimed at OP but at OP's whole generation, and thetefore a sicial statement not a personal attack.

@Catija typo: 'social statement' I mean.

Gypsy Spellweaver

03:51

Is IPS supposed to be a soapbox?

Henry WH Hack v2.1

Soapbox?

Catija

04:18

@GypsySpellweaver I don't follow. That answer actually answers the question and then explains the reasoning. We don't delete content we disagree with.

Extroverted Main Man

05:20

0

Q: When the time to switch a job for a person having one year experience?

hope you all are doing well. I'm sitting in my office and find out about Interpersonal Skills channel. I have question surrounding in my mind. What is the best time to switch job for a person having one year of experience? Mostly people said you need to spend more time in an organization like ab...

friends conventionality answers

Bradley Wilson

06:39

Morning all

Introverted Meta Man.

06:50

0

Q: Wouldn't [Politics] be under [Communication] anyway?

Any chance people with high enough rep could delete the closed question under politics? I don't think it warrants it's own tag, as it'd be under communication anyway?

discussion tags

Rory Alsop

07:04

@Beofett don't worry about that - I took it mostly (hopefully) as frustration rather than a personal dig.

@BradleyWilson morning

Bradley Wilson

@RoryAlsop How are you, today?

Rory Alsop

Enjoying a bright Friday morning. Looking out my office window at the trees. How about you?

Bradley Wilson

Not a bad way to start the morning, just having my usual coffee and toast before I head to work myself

NVZ

Namaste

Bradley Wilson

@NVZ I'm not too sure if he's looking for the perspective of [germany] in the question you've just edited, I think he's trying to work out why it would be a problem the UK as it isn't from where he is from. I think the [united-kingdom] tag would suffice?

NVZ

07:17

I see. Feel free to remove Germany

Bradley Wilson

will do, was just comfirming

confirming*

I'm quite surprised this is still pending... interpersonal.stackexchange.com/review/suggested-edits/1443

NVZ

@BradleyWilson I suppose my edit was not stepping on your toes.

the salary thing.

Bradley Wilson

it certainly wasn't

NVZ

I thought it is not really an update to the post itself, hence removed the "Update" you posted on the top.

It's only additional information, or further reading.

Bradley Wilson

that's true

NVZ

07:25

It doesn't need a question mark.

Why would you need it?

Bradley Wilson

just going from the title, and he's also asking why

NVZ

I have reworded the phrasing. So it's not exactly the title.

A question mark makes no sense there.

:)

Bradley Wilson

my bad

didn't notice the change in wording

NVZ

"One or more of the answers is exemplary and worthy of an additional bounty."

Bradley Wilson

i've rolled it back

NVZ

07:28

May I know which one that is? :)

Bradley Wilson

you'll find out in 6 hours ;)

NVZ

6 days, you mean?

Bradley Wilson

i'll be awarding it in 6 hours, but i'll tell you anyway interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/1838/2167

NVZ

No don't award it in 6 hours.

Bradley Wilson

how come?

NVZ

07:30

You're spending rep anyway.

So let the question stay bountied until bounty expiration nears.

By that time, it will have additional exposure.

Bradley Wilson

reasoning?

NVZ

And more views.

Bradley Wilson

oh, sure

NVZ

And more upvotes and interactions.

Bradley Wilson

makes sense

you've got it all figured out @NVZ

NVZ

07:31

By that time you'll probably earn back your reputation you'll lose by the bounty.

Bradley Wilson

I already have

NVZ

And maybe even more answers.

Bradley Wilson

but i can never say no to more rep

NVZ

@BradleyWilson I'm just good like that. Figuring out things is my job. :)

Rory Alsop

That's always a good call. Keeping bounties on until the end keeps them featured

Especially during the early growth phase, bounties can be a great way to indicate which questions are the ones you think should be good examples for the site as well

Bradley Wilson

07:44

Makes total sense, I was just a bit too eager to reward the answer I really liked without thinking of the other contributions it could make.

Thanks for the heads up, btw @NVZ

Extroverted Main Man

08:02

0

Q: Partner going through phone

My girlfriend and me are 27-28 years of age. Recently I have caught her going through my phone when I am out of the room and read my text messages, mails, facebook..., checking who I was interacting with and so on. I told her I did not appreciate this and would like her to respect my privacy. I c...

boundaries relationships privacy

Bradley Wilson

@ExtrovertedMainMan, Wouldn't that be quite opinion-based?

Rory Alsop

08:18

Lol at responding to Extroverted Main Man

Bradley Wilson

got to involve him somehow, he is extroverted and chatty after all

Rory Alsop

08:34

@BradleyWilson Oh, I like your answer on the phone one. Have an upvote. Yours answers the headline question better than mine - I focused a bit more on the girlfriend's feelings

Bradley Wilson

@RoryAlsop why thankyou, your answer is much wiser than mine (coming from an impulsive 24 year old), but, we're both right in the sense that it's trust that's the issue not the phone

Bradley Wilson

09:41

@NVZ I'm not sure if you did it intentionally or not, but when I share a link with my user number inside it i.e /q/1960/2167 to contribute towards the announcer badge, please don't change the url to yours.

NVZ

10:12

@BradleyWilson that is not intentional.

Bradley Wilson

No worries, bud. I thought as much.

Extroverted Main Man

11:00

0

Q: An extremely confrontational person knows I blocked them - what should I do when seeing them in public?

Context: I met person X through a mutual friend MF because we all shared an interest. X was newly interested and had a newly reconnected with MF after about 5 years. MF and X are from different a city about 2 hours away from where I live. We went for a meal in a group of 5 and I had approximatel...

friends united-kingdom conflict-aversion difficult-people conflicts

NVZ

@ExtrovertedMainMan that's like a novel.

NVZ

12:34

hello

it's a me

maario

'It’s-a Me, Mario!'

►

Extroverted Main Man

14:38

1

Q: How can I tell people that me and my girlfriend don't want children of our own?

Everytime there's a baby involved in any sort of conversation (new parent, talking about kids, etc.), if I'm involved the question inevitably turns to me and my girlfriend, and when we plan to have children. We're not married yet and have talked with each other, and we don't plan to have children...

united-states children

Introverted Meta Man.

15:27

1

Q: Would it make sense to have gendered tags?

Some questions, especially ones that might end up on the relationships or romance tags, necessarily require different advice for men than for women. Likewise, some questions might be soliciting advice from a female or male perspective in particular. Here are a couple of questions I encountere...

discussion

curiousdannii

15:44

So many not-great answers suggesting making bad jokes to try to diffuse conflicts or avoid awkward questions. At least they're usually not the highest voted answers. I would be happy not to see any more of these answers though.

Bradley Wilson

@curiousdannii I think the community is handling these well, most of what I've seen have been flagged at low quality and/or downvoted. You're going to get people who use humour as a defence mechanism everywhere you go, I feel.

Extroverted Main Man

0

Q: Why are people negative on the internet?

I wish i was the only one to see it like this, so i can give blame to myself for assuming things that aren't there. But it turns out that a lot of people around me share the same conclusion: The internet is very negative in general. At least the people on it. I know that every individual is diff...

difficult-people social-media internet

Bradley Wilson

@ExtrovertedMainMan, isn't that far too broad to be answered both objectively and in answerable size?

NVZ

Too broad indeed.

There is no particular culture/region/anything.

People behave differently based on their background or access to the internet.

But in general, people can be more negative online, because they are able to stay anonymous.

Bradley Wilson

16:02

I can assume that's the answer he wanted, but he needs to clarify that within the question

NVZ

Somebody posted an answer.

Tomas

18:02

Think i corrected it, like you wished?

NVZ

18:43

Hello Catija

Anoplexian

I just had the most awkward answer to one of my questions....

NVZ

I know right!

"God made you this way, bla bla bla"

Anoplexian

Ok so I wasn't the only one who thought they had a computer in the 16th century then?

NVZ

I mean, I respect every religion. I don't respect people who push their beliefs onto others.

Anoplexian

Honestly, I read it and felt like someone was trying to beat me over the head with a bible.

NVZ

18:52

@Anoplexian Do you want to? I'm up for it. :P

HDE 226868

19:51

I just came back after a day away and found myself staring at flags on 30 posts or comments.

Introverted Meta Man.

1

Q: Shorter URL alias, like ips.stackexchange.com

The domain http://interpersonal.stackexchange.com is painfully long to type. Some sites with long names use abbreviations in the URL, like http://dsp.stackexchange.com or http://sqa.stackexchange.com I don't propose changing the main URL, though. Just add http://ips.stackexchange.com as an alia...

feature-request

Bradley Wilson

@HDE226868 Keeping you on your toes ;-)

@HDE226868 by the way, is there a minimum number of nominations for the best answers meta post? or would you just lower the bounties if you don't get many nominations?

NVZ

@HDE226868 Why is that? Were all 3 of you away at the same time?

HDE 226868

@BradleyWilson I'm not sure. I figured answers would get more upvotes.

@BradleyWilson Haha. :-)

@NVZ We're all busy at the moment, for various reasons. I've been wrapping up my summer job this week, for instance.

Bradley Wilson

@HDE226868 I would have thought, too. Especially with it being featured and the traffic that is being driven to this site recently.

HDE 226868

19:59

We're getting through the flags all right, just in bigger batches - not quickly.

NVZ

@HDE226868 How many is too many?

What's an expected figure for flags on a beta site?

Extroverted Main Man

20:17

0

Q: How can I talk to a friend about their seemingly judgmental comments or pushy (to me) behavior when I talk to them about family problems?

Background I have a couple of friends/co-workers that I really respect and like to spend time with or talk to. We have good conversations and similar interests. However, I feel like if I ever talk to them about family issues I'm having, they jump to conclusions or are overly judgmental about ho...

friends united-states communication

SQB

20:30

@Anoplexian linky?

HDE 226868

20:57

@NVZ Certainly less than 5/day. Most days on HSM and Mythology, I see 1 or less.

Bradley Wilson

I know I certainly do more than 5 a day haha

in regards to flagging

Anoplexian

@SQB

NVZ

@HDE226868 Brace yourself. I'm a ninja flagger.

3,681 helpful flags on ELU

Nobody has more than that.

on ELU

Catija

21:13

I'm on vacation. Be nice to HDE while I'm out.

NVZ

So, like, all 3 of you on vacay?

Flags will be zombieing around while you're gone.

HDE 226868

@NVZ Nah, I'm still around.

Just getting ready to leave for college.

Catija

Heck, I deleted a bunch of comments yesterday and answered a meta question.

NVZ

Although, I'm seeing only one user with more helpful flags than me. But i'm not really sure if that's a human user. Looks to me like an automated script flags stuff for them.

english.stackexchange.com/users/94657/michelle?tab=badges

Zero people reached. Zero posts posted. Nothing done except earn all sorts of badges and helpful flags.

HDE 226868

I have 410 helpful flags on Stack Overflow and no posts. Maybe they just like it.

NVZ

21:20

@HDE226868 Sure. I have flags marked helpful on a lot of sites.

But this user page is the strangest I have ever seen.

HDE 226868

Oh, that user.

Yeah, that's a script.

NVZ

@HDE226868 How do you figure that out?

SQB

@Anoplexian ... speechless

Bradley Wilson

@Anoplexian It's shame it's past the cutoff, I would have totally nominated it

HDE 226868

@NVZ I know that from the past.

NVZ

21:51

Seems like conflicting results to me. You say script, another on ELU chat says not.

Henry WH Hack v2.1

22:08

@GypsySpellweaverMeet me on the other side.

Paranormal!

I didn't meant to post that now.

Ok when you have time meet me on the other side.

Anoplexian

22:22

@SQB Right? I didn't think that sort of fanaticism was something that SE still had, being a pretty non-religious place for information (aside from the dedicated portions of course).

I especially didn't expect to see it on ISP in such a....spectacular.....fashion.

Extroverted Main Man

22:36

0

Q: How to respond when told to "check your privilege"

This is a timely question for 2017. Notably today in an answer to one of my questions on this board (which was downvoted and deleted) a responded stated that I was from a privileged background. The specific privilege was for age with stereotypical millennial "never struggled". In the real w...

conversations conflicts

Introverted Meta Man.

23:46

0

Q: At what point will the length of a Q/A be too long to be usable?

I am asking this because while we understand that even a single issue can be complicated with many points of view, at some point the length will get in the way. For example, How can I tell people that my girlfriend and I don't want children of our own? At the moment, there are 12 answers (rough...

discussion

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