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12:04 AM
16 messages moved to Trash
 
12:56 AM
you're really liking that clean-up job :P @EmC
 
@ElizB gotta live up to my title of "glorified janitor" :P
(which is meant as a reference to something in a meta post somewhere, I just can't seem to find it right now..)
plus it makes this room look less overrun by bots :D
 
@EmC Yeah haha
Hope your day was good.
 
@ElizB thanks! I spent most of my work day being frustrated at my computer, but other than that it's been fine :) how about you?
 
I went to my classes, and I think I did better on the stats quiz this time (there's a quiz every thursday) because i met with teacher and studied for a while at home.
Went to counseling which was good, and right at the end when the thought of telling my dad of my decision that if he wants to meet with me, it has to be with me and my counselor, so that he doesn't go off track and go on his own tangent... anxiety came up
 
@EmC Much of my day was being frustrated at C++ and its type system.
One of the reasons I love Python.
 
1:09 AM
so first I went and tried to find a nature preserve... but ended up driving for at least 30 minutes because I made the mistake of being on the wrong side of the river... it was on the other side, so i had to get back on the highway, cross the river, then finally found the hiking trails. it was nice. I watched a blue heron for at least another 20-30 minutes
it attempted to catch a fish, failed, then waited 10-15 minutes, finally got one and gulped it down. gracefully flew away. it taught me a few things
 
@El'endiaStarman oh man, yeah. I write Java for work and today's issue was because I switched to a new project with a new IDE and library and whatnot. I miss how much easier that stuff always is for me in Python :(
@ElizB blue herons are so cool :D
 
the hike wore me out, so i came home, semi-crashed, made a quesadilla, bumped my head hard on the fridge door... ate, and now just drank some tea to quiet down my Peristalsis, and trying to ignore a stress-induced headache. :P I'm thinking about hitting the hay earlier, but i havent talked with hubby all day and he's still in "recovery mode" :P
 
we saw a normal heron when we went hiking a couple weekends ago, it just stood in the lake and watched us for a bit
 
i like how graceful they are.
 
yeah. I think they're very peaceful birds to watch :)
 
1:16 AM
i was on a bridge overlooking a creek within the wetland, and it was standing on a partly submerged log, and the creek was full of duckweed and algae, so it was easy to see where the fish and frogs surfaced, and the heron was watching all the action. there were so many frogs hopping around, i was quiet enough to hear the splashing and I followed the heron's gaze to where the frog was
 
oh, I like frogs though :(
 
@EmC In broad terms, what's your new project?
 
Sorry, it's part of the circle of life... Heron's gotta eat something...
 
@El'endiaStarman hmm, it's kind of hard to explain here, but mostly user interface stuff
 
Well, that certainly fits the "broad terms" criterion.
 
1:22 AM
haha, sorry, I don't want to give too much away! it's for mobile devices, if that helps :P
 
Hehe yeah, of course. User interface related for mobile devices, got it! And since you're using Java, Android?
 
yup!
 
Yeah, you'd probably have said Objective C otherwise. Which is quite a funky language.
Working with that involved a lot of googling.
2
 
I've done Java for years, but not Android, so there's been a bit of a learning curve
the only Apple device I own is an ipod nano from 2007 ;)
 
Yeah, software engineering involves constant learning curves. :P
 
1:24 AM
very true!
 
no apple devices here, except for his work computer
 
And I technically have an iPod somewhere.
 
I think mine might finally need to be retired, sadly, the battery life has taken a turn for the worse in the last few months :(
 
@EmC that's why i think it works so well for him, he's always learning something :)
 
@ElizB yeah, I can relate! it definitely keeps things interesting :)
 
1:28 AM
@EmC I don't know why, but having that constant learning curve is stressful for me.
I get really snappy at him if I don't get something he's trying to patiently explain to me
 
Oh, for sure, there's always a little stress, but that's necessarily part of growing and developing skills.
 
right, but feeling that stress for a longer period of time just... i don't like it as much
or I don't deal with it as well
air conditioner sound (CLANK) Oi.
it apparently makes that sound when it's turning on or off
sometimes
 
at my last job I got stressed out because I wasn't really learning new things, and I felt like I was falling further and further behind my peers :\
 
@EmC yeah, that's frustrating, for sure.
Alright yawns I'm gonna hit the hay. Have a good night :) Nice chatting with you, as always!
 
@ElizB same to you :) night!
 
 
2 hours later…
3:32 AM
sup dawgs
 
3:45 AM
so quiet in here
 
Hello! (I was reading the older message)
@ElizB Thanks for the answer :)
 
4:03 AM
If you could downvote and flag... interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/18638/21067
 
 
1 hour later…
5:14 AM
0
Q: Coping or Treatment Strategies for Avoidance Behavior?

QuixoticI am wondering how I can help an individual overcome counter-productive avoidance behavior. For example, let's say a woman (let's call her Jane) works in an office where her boss once became physically violent and had a history of screaming at his subordinates. Despite this having been dealt wit...

 
 
1 hour later…
6:19 AM
0
Q: Appropriate of offering shelter without sounding creepy

UmbrellaManYesterday afternoon I (male, late 30) went to the supermarket in my neighborhood to buy something. Since the sky was menacing rain, I took along an umbrella. Lucky me, when I got out from the supermarket it was raining, so I opened the umbrella and headed home. Few meters ahead I saw a woman (l...

 
6:35 AM
0
Q: How can I remain friends with my sponsor child without continually funding them?

CoomieAsking for my wife: My wife has been sponsoring a child in Africa for 15 years. They regularly exchanged letters through the sponsorship program. No direct contact occurred, the letters were being transported and translated by the sponsorship program. The money we sent to the sponsorship progra...

 
6:50 AM
12 messages moved to Trash
Morning
 
Hey there!
 
sleepily waves
 
A J
7:27 AM
@Magisch afternoon!
Lunch time! \o/
 
 
1 hour later…
8:29 AM
0
Q: How do you deal with colleagues, acquaintances asking you for knowledge that you gained with months of effort?

MugenI'm pretty sure that these are things that we all face. Let's say that you spent months researching about something (be it moving from full time job to being a freelancer, creating a website, starting a business etc). There are colleagues who don't speak to you, but want to learn how they can do ...

 
JAD
@ExtrovertedMainMan welcome to stackoverflow, a website where people from all over their world ask for knowledge others gained with months of effort without being interested in the person behind the information.
 
@JAD Just don't tell them you have a website.
Or, if they find out via-via, tell them there's a reason you didn't tell them about that :P
To do snarky Dutch replies...
 
JAD
I'm writing up a frame-challengy answer
 
11 messages moved to Trash
 
Wow... three answers already and I'm still asking questions :P
 
JAD
8:40 AM
@Tinkeringbell woops
 
Y'all are all three saying the same too :P
That's okay though.
 
JAD
hmm, I didn't want to mention it in the answer, but for above reasons, I think the question is slightly hypocritical
 
@JAD Yeah well, if people don't wanna share, they don't wanna share. All we can do is warn them this might be a danger to developing future relations with people, but we can't forbid it ;)
 
0
Q: How to tactfully shut down gossip-talkers?

JCJI have run into a problem at work which I can not figure out the best way to deal with; the coworkers often like to gossip about eachother, and me being new makes me a great person to tell gossip (and most likely gossip about). How can I tactfully tell them that I would prefer not to hear or ta...

 
JAD
hmm, my answer is doing pretty well :D
 
9:57 AM
@JAD It's probably the snark in the first sentence... not sure I really like it. It makes the point, but in a slightly mean way.
 
JAD
Hmm, I'll think of a way to phrase that less on the nose
 
10:13 AM
sup dawgs
 
JAD
10:28 AM
@Tinkeringbell see my edit
 
@JAD I'll take a look.
 
JAD
41
Q: What is the origin of 3 meals a day?

Lance PollardWondering if there is an origin of the "3 meals a day" concept. For example, in English we have specific words for them: Breakfast. Lunch. Dinner. But we have a few more for other meals in the day (I can only think of one actually): Brunch. According to this we can add: Elevenses. Tea. ...

Must resist commenting "what about second breakfast?"
 
@JAD Looks loads better, thanks!
@JAD I dunno, maybe they have a funnier comment policy over there ;)
 
JAD
given that the entire thread was just moved to chat, meh, rather not kick any shins (horrible dutchism, I know)
 
@JAD It's a good one ;)
We have a whole book on those somewhere at home, once a funny gift to my youngest brother :P
 
JAD
10:46 AM
well, at least it still kinda makes sense
also, that question hit HNQ. oh boy
 
@JAD Duh, basic HNQ bait, I could've told you it would when it got three answers at the same time ;)
 
JAD
@Tinkeringbell oh yeah. Add to that the first paragraph and I'm very interested where this answer will end up
 
JAD
11:01 AM
@Mithrandir each time I look at your profile picture I still see Aragorn. They look so similar that it really takes a second glance to tell them apart :P
 
O_O
Which profile picture?
 
JAD
Violet
somehow the long black hair looks really similar
 
11:23 AM
Morning. Yawns
 
11:34 AM
20 messages moved to Trash
@ElizB \o
 
JAD
@Mithrandir :P
 
@JAD (psst, I never had Aragorn as a profile pic)
I had Arwen, though, which did look similar to the one I have now.
 
11:56 AM
\o/ hey! Feedback is back! :P
grumps According to my fitbit sleep tracker, I spent 45 minutes restless and awake during the night. No wonder I'm sleepy
 
@ElizB Heh. Thanks for the reminder. I should remember to use my fitbit for stuff other than step counts and time ;)
 
A J
@JAD If it keeps going like this, it might be the highest-voted answer on IPS and you'll loose over thousands rep due to rep cap. :P
 
JAD
@Mithrandir same shit :P
and I must've sworn it was aragorn, but ohwell
@AJ The highest score is still almost 400 points off. Don't get ahead of yourself
 
7
A: The many avatars of SFF.SE

MithrandirThe chronicles of my avatars... The first one worth mentioning was the Hufflepuff crest: The Hufflepuff crest was chosen because, well, I'm a Hufflepuff. And at the beginning of my activity here, I was only active in the harry-potter tag, and so my avatar reflected that. Around Winter Bas...

I'm voting to close this question as off-topic because I don't want to receive any more answers. Rather than answering my question people are answering a much broader question (aka I should share whatever knowledge I have). I would love to discuss and ponder more about that but currently I want to lock this question to prevent flame replies. I request the mods to close/lock this question to prevent more slam-downs. — Mugen 1 min ago
o_O
 
@Tinkeringbell i especially like it for the sleep tracker. I've already given up on steps because my mom and step dad excersise daily and surpass me so I've just ignored it
 
user15026
12:13 PM
@ElizB I just look at my own steps - I have a sitting down job and most of my Fitbit friends have active jobs so I always have less steps :P I like the sleep tracking.
 
@Ash Yeah, that's what I do
 
user15026
(And I am pleasantly surprised, I slept more than I thought considering I had to be at work for 8 am today instead of noon)
 
JAD
@Mithrandir interesting, didn't know you could closevote your own question like that
 
12:29 PM
That question about sharing knowledge is troublesome. I get what he's asking, but coming to stackexchange and saying it's taken him months of effort to build a personal website is not going to endear him to anyone.
 
A J
@JAD You can always do.
 
JAD
@Philbo I think he already has had the wave of HNQ telling him that in the deleted comments
 
@JAD Yeah which is why I didn't want to write anything there (also it wouldn't be a question or improvement). I think there's definitely a good question about "being used for personal skills and knowledge by people who aren't personal to the user" in there but it needs an example that's separate from Workplace/IT.
 
JAD
@Philbo SE isn't limited to workplace or IT though. But I get your point
 
A J
@Noon You're around?
 
12:42 PM
@AJ Yes
why?
 
A J
@Noon OK. Can you please reword a sentence in the first paragraph of your answer a little bit?
 
@AJ No problem, what is it?
 
A J
@Noon the second line in the first paragraph. the "busted" part
 
@AJ Done. I take it that it wasn't very polite?
 
[ SmokeDetector | MS ] Manually reported question: Learn How To Draw A Snowman And A Bird With Number 8 by user21890 on interpersonal.SE
 
12:50 PM
0
Q: Learn How To Draw A Snowman And A Bird With Number 8

user21890Learn How to draw a Snowman And A Bird With Number 8. Centered on both the beginners and the kids.If you have any query, or suggestions regarding our episode or the show - please share it with us in the comment section down below!

 
@Philbo I think what may have raised some hackles (including mine tbh) was the irony of a question that was basically "how can I avoid sharing my hard-earned knowledge with people who aren't interested in being my friend" and expecting people whom he has no interest in being friends with to give him their hard earned knowledge in reply
 
A J
@Noon It's up to reader though, but we don't use this language here. :)
 
@AJ Sorry, I will try to be more carefull next time ^^'
 
A J
@Noon nah. It's okay. you weren't rude to anyone. :)
 
@motosubatsu Well... I'd be having a pretty dim view of humanity if people asked me questions (in real life) and sauntered off to never be heard from again. Even if on a site like SE you don't 'make friends', you still get something in return for your answers usually, be that reputation or online people to chat with.
If you don't get any innate satisfaction from teaching, these kinds of people can be really draining.
 
A J
12:58 PM
I used to have the similar attitude, but I found out that it was really fun to share knowledge as it helped me achieve some respect and friends. ;)
 
JAD
@Mugen I have just passed 100k on math.SE, and it's not the points, but the knowledge that I helped someone out that really keeps me going (though the points are a bonus). In my commute I often overhear students discuss their math tests etc, and I fantisize about going up to them and offering my help, because I really want to. But I fear it would come off as strange / creepy, so I don't. I love teaching people the stuff that I know well. You might not be that kind of person, and that's fair, but it might be what people expect from you, simply because they have no reason to believe otherwise. — Arthur 13 mins ago
 
@Tinkeringbell I can totally understand that position - I don't share it because I help (on SE and IRL) for helpings sake
and while I don't think badly of people who don't share my view I do think it's a bit hypocritical of someone to openly state that they are happy to take advantage of "free" advice from others but act like it's the biggest imposition in the world if someone asks them something
 
@motosubatsu For me, the satisfaction only comes when I see people understand and actually use whatever I teach them. It makes me a bit of an impatient teacher, especially in real life. Online, I know there's more than 1 person I'm reaching at a time, so it's a little easier to say 'I'm going to do this for helpings sake' as I know I'm not doing it for one person that might not appreciate and dissmiss it.
@motosubatsu So, it's up to us to point out that there may be positives to answering, or at least answering partially ;) That question got a LOT of 'you're a hypocrite' in a very short time though. I don't think I ever protected a question that quickly.
is a nice and good point actually, that no answer yet seems to fully address.
 
@Tinkeringbell the thing is.. those calling the OP a hypocrite weren't wrong, this comment:
Your comparison is pretty inaccurate IMO. I'm talking about helping out people in real life rather than on stackexchange. Over here you we get the points which feels good. In real life, I get nothing. A guy comes up to me who doesn't speak to me otherwise, asks me for something which I know, and then walks off without any interest in me. And I'm not talking about casual stuff like "where's the bathroom", "How do you operate the printer". I'm talking about knowledge that took me months to figure out. I tried various software, learnt how to customize it - repeat. — Mugen 2 hours ago
was fairly offensive IMO
suggesting that people answering on SE haven't spent "months" figuring stuff out and equating it with things like "where's the bathroom?" is ridiculous
 
@motosubatsu Hmm. I thought that was referring to the questions these real life people asked, not the ones on SE.
But yeah, that is leaving open some stuff for interpretation. That's gone now, right?
 
1:11 PM
nope
 
Should be now then, refresh your page :)
 
thanks :)
 
JAD
@motosubatsu depens a bit on which stack you're talking about, but generally yes :P
 
1:23 PM
0
Q: How do I tell my coworker to stop talking about her kid every day?

FanofCometsA coworker in the cubicle next to mine only wants to talk about her daughter when someone comes to her cubicle to engage in small talk. The conversation may start out talking about things like our last company meeting, weather, politics, sports, economics, etc., but the conversation always ends w...

 
i'm already in weekend mode in my head...
 
@JAD yeah it will vary depending on the stack...but the majority of them probably fall into the category I describe, and if you think about it IPS is one where people have essentially been "learning" and "working" on those skills being asked about since the day they were born
 
JAD
@motosubatsu oh yeah definitely.
 
1:38 PM
@ElizB oh hey you! :D
How are you dear? Did you finally manage to have feedback on you work?
 
@avazula Yup, mentor finally caught up last night and sent me feedback. Researching more now on what else to add
I feel bad that she hurt her back and was behind for a little.
 
Hope she's feeling better now?
Were you satisfied with her feedback?
 
@avazula Yeah, she added more resources for me to look at, and more suggestions because I'm slightly unsure what to add for the health literacy part in general. I'm 100% good with the focus area- deaf and hard of hearing people
 
user15026
@ElizB so am I and I work tomorrow XD
 
@Ash Aw sorry. i'm going apple picking in the morning with a deaf and hard of hearing family get together and then helping with a church event for youth in the evening
 
user15026
1:51 PM
@ElizB that sounds fun!
 
@Ash it should be fun, depending on how well i sleep tonight.
 
user15026
Here's hoping you get lots of sleep :)
 
I hope so too. Last night, I woke up with a start because of some bizarre dream
it was 3 am or something
 
@Mithrandir ಠ__ಠ
 
JAD
@EmC damnit you made me look
 
2:05 PM
@JAD hahaha
sneaky way to audit who in the room actually clicks those links :P
 
JAD
or to make sure nobody does :P
 
user15026
The Bridge has taught me always to hover before clicking because of how often we've trolled each other with Rebecca Black's song Friday
 
lol
the rickroll is more of a classic no?
 
user15026
It is, yeah, but for some reason Friday happens a lot more on The Bridge (less than it used to but it is still a thing)
 
JAD
2:42 PM
@Ash my first association for The Bridge is a danish-swedish crime tv series. I think you are not referring to that
 

 The Bridge

General Arqade Chat. We tried to leave once, but the door lock...
 
JAD
ah figures
what is it a reference to?
 
I dunno; I don't hang out there.
 
user15026
@JAD The bridge of a spaceship.
 
user15026
(At least, that's always been my understanding, I joined long after it was named)
 
JAD
2:45 PM
oh right
 
 
3 hours later…
5:51 PM
@ElizB that's nice you got a positive feedback. Ain't easy in research fields IMO
But I'm sure you deserved it :D
 
6:03 PM
@avazula Yeah, i'm happy I got feedback in good time. The presentation is on the 4th of October, so the powerpoint must be done by then... so that's the hurry on feedback :P
 
6:33 PM
0
Q: How to deal with supervisor who hates and discourages

QuotidianMy supervisor always discourages. My reputation in team has been ruined by her. Most of the time she ignores me. Whenever I try to build some confidence. She finds faults in my work. (for ex - She asked some question - I was started to answer. and without letting me complete the first sentence- t...

 
i have a mosquito bite on my elbow that basically got swollen... it makes me wonder if another bug got me that has mosquito bite-like symptoms but longer lasting and worse?
 
Possible
Or you had a spontaneous sensitive reaction
 
yeah, must be. There's one on my ankle, two on my forehead, and a few more somewhere on the back of my shoulders/arms
just the one on my elbow is seriously swollen up and hurting. None of the others hurt like this one... strange.
There might be two on the same spot...
 
@El'endiaStarman bahahaha
 
user15026
6:45 PM
@El'endiaStarman hahahaha this is great
 
JAD
hmm, so that's 1k+ rep lost due to repcap :/
 
@JAD haha it's like counting the minutes left in the workday/class--don't do it, it'll only make you sad!
 
JAD
lol
just cherish the gold badge I guess :P
 
I like to make it a goal to only have answers over a certain upvote count on the first page of my network profile. So a strong answer like that is guaranteed to help for a long while :)
 
7:05 PM
0
Q: Future sister-in-law upsetting family with inattention?

CeefraIn 2 weeks I will have a new sister in law as my brother is getting married. I knew her before they dated and thought that that she talked a lot about herself, but that otherwise was friendly and pleasant. My mum can get exciteable and my brother was worried when the gf came round for her first...

 
JAD
@scohe001 I got a feeling a goal like that is very much at the whim of HNQ though
which means IPS is a good place to start at tbh :P
 
7:26 PM
@scohe001 GOSH DARN IT I KEEP PUTTING MY COMMENTS IN ANSWERS >.< Thanks for calling me on that.
 
7:39 PM
@JAD haha yea IPS has been doing my goals wonders :P
@TheTinyMan no worries! It happens :)
 
 
1 hour later…
8:51 PM
@Tink thanks for making that comment. I was going to bring the thread to your attention the next time I saw another comment on there too. Glad you caught it first!
 
@scohe001 You're welcome! ;)
It was really getting out of hand, Ontamu is getting more crap than they probably deserve for making that remark. I hope this will bring some reason back to that answer ;)
 
Crazy how one sentence can turn the whole answer
I wouldn't be surprised if they'd have had 20-30 more upvotes without it
 
@Tinkeringbell Maybe it's just that I live in Chicago, but typically offering your umbrella is either done to elderly/disabled people, or people that you might consider dating. Offering to share an umbrella outside of those scenarios seems less common. That might be why that aspect was brought up, but I'm not sure why there is such hostility to that aspect of the answer. If the OP isn't interested, he can just ignore that part. The important part is in the first paragraph. — Greg Schmit 17 secs ago
Interesting :)
I'd offer my umbrella to practically everyone, if it was big enough for two people :P
I really do hope the next reaction/comment comes from the OP of that answer though :)
@scohe001 Oh, come on! I just got rid of most of the comment flags :P
90 messages moved to Trash
 
9:20 PM
@Tinkeringbell hmm where I just moved from, people really never talk to strangers unless they need something so I'm on the creepy side of the argument lol
@Tinkeringbell haha gotta get those tp's in!!
Also sorry about the delay. I sent that tp and then my coworker dropped by to pull me away
 
0
Q: Old friend that calls me multiple times a day for years and it needs to end, How can I stop this?

EMSI have this old college "friend" that has been calling me for years almost every day. We live over 1,000 miles apart now and haven't actually seen each other fact to face for over 5 years now. But it finally has gotten to a point where it is actually affecting my daily life. Previously I have bee...

 
9:48 PM
1
Q: Why is this random act of kindness considered flirting?

SteveIn Offering to share my umbrella without sounding creepy op, assumed to be a man, shares an umbrella with a woman because it's raining a lot. For some reason good portion of the response to this question revolves around flirting. Given the situation, I don't understand why this is considered fl...

0
Q: How to interpret someone didn't reply my email

user902383I tried to contact with certain person (from US) and discuss couple matters. I Got email from that person, asking me about my availability for next week. I replied I don't mind as all proposed dates suits me. Now it's almost end of the week, and I didn't got any response. Was My response impolit...

 
@scohe001 heh. My weekend started, no more flag handling tonight : P
 
@Tinkeringbell haha enjoy the break while it lasts!!
 
10:28 PM
@ExtrovertedMainMan Should probably be moved to meta.
 

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