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12:00 AM
@medica not really
 
I kinda like Posisbly. Sounds vaguely like a Dickens character.
 
And as usual, Socrates posts the questions, talks a lot, leads answers on to what he really meant all along, and in the end gives no definitive answer.
 
@skullpatrol May I ask you some perhaps more pointed questions then?
 
@medica sure
 
(anyone disagreeing with me here can chime in)
 
12:01 AM
@Robusto Random? no. A mistake? maybe. Are you just planning to end things now? Have you given up?
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Not on the site. Not yet.
 
@skullpatrol Would you expect a friend to try to or to humiliate you on purpose?
 
@medica you haven't said anything to disagree with. Waiting...
 
waiting for answers
 
@medica yes, if I deserved it, why not?
 
12:02 AM
Where's the question?
 
ok, that's interesting.
 
@Robusto Grr you evil two-minuter.
 
A question is not something to disagree with.
 
@Mitch Would you expect a friend to try to or to humiliate you on purpose?
 
@Mitch Haha yes! That's his Way. However, in the end, readers will have learned something.
 
12:03 AM
@medica There's nothing to disagree with there.
 
@Cerberus The fault is in your attention span. I got that in well under two minutes.
 
@medica Not normally. But one person's humiliation is not necessarily the same as another's. Like what if you're acting really drunk, out of control. A friend might have to take you down a peg, and you might not like it at the time, but later on be grateful.
 
@medica Yes, in a fit of anger. Of course it is the opposite of friendly behaviour.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 So, great. It's reasonable for a friend to point it out to you when you've been wrong.
 
@Cerberus Argh! No! Just answer that dang question! Friend or foe?
 
12:04 AM
I wonder if there are differences between women and men, as well.
 
@Robusto You know my attention span. You should have taken it into account! Or, better yet, you should have run for moderator, so that you could have corrected my typos always.
 
@medica Probably unnecessary differences.
 
OK, I agree. Now, do you think that a friend should do that publicly or privately (wondering)
 
@medica depends on the circumstances.
 
12:05 AM
@medica I think you are treading on explosive territory here. What are you trying to do?
 
@Cerberus Nobody wants me for a moderator. I'd be lazier than @RegDwigнt (though arguably better looking).
 
@medica OK, in most cases I'd suspect yes, but I suppose there might be circumstances (like Cerb's). Also, the humiliator may not realize it. Still a friend.
 
Say there was a choice.
 
@Robusto Nothing better than a lazy mod who doesn't bother me!
 
@medica ideally, privately. But life is not always ideal.
 
12:06 AM
OK, so friends can make mistakes and still be friends, then?
 
Of course. Up to a point.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 right. Agreed.
 
@medica Of course, depending on the mistake
 
@medica Of course. Forgiveness is a wonderful thing.
 
@Cerberus I know, right? Also, @Medica is this all about someone we all mutually might be acquainted with?
 
12:07 AM
@Undo great! I agree.
Oh, yes, but I think it might be different than you think.
And that's why I don't know... I'm not chat-savvy.
 
@medica OK, and the other shoe about to drop?
Or is it a penny?
 
Can a friend do the same thing over and over again - the same mistake - and still be a friend? How many times?
 
@Mitch or a beat
@medica depends on the mistake.
 
@medica as to definition of a friend? sure why not.
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 or a track.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 let's call the mistake ...repeated unkindnesses.
 
12:09 AM
Good evening.
 
@medica 3 times. It's the rule in comedy and friends.
 
@medica I think you know the answer. What are you trying to do here?
@Mahnax Aloha.
 
@medica wait.. no... 7.
 
@Mitch Things that a person
 
12:10 AM
Simple example: I have some friends who are impossible to get a hold of. They never answer emails, or voicemail, or answer their phones, or read their texts, or reply to snail mail. At some point, the mental toll of maintaining the friendship is too much.
 
decipher chat culture.
 
@medica That's broad
 
@Cerberus nods
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 so, unrequited friendship.
 
makes complicated hand signal
 
12:10 AM
@Cerberus how dare you!
 
@medica Not really unrequited, per se. Just really lazy.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Snail mail, even?
@Mitch I thought you liked it.
 
that's not too hard, because some friendships run their courses, I think.
 
@Cerberus yes. in theory.
 
Haha.
 
12:11 AM
@Cerberus I know, right? Phaedrus is like, "Dude, Eros is the oldest of the gods so he brings it old school, ya feel me?" And my man Soc is like, "Whoa, dude. Step off or I'm gonna hafta school ya. There's like this divine horse and this mortal horse, an' — hey, what you smokin'? Gimme a hit offa that."
 
It hurts, but it happens, without ill will.
 
@Cerberus weird hand movement
 
@Robusto That sounds like an excellent translation and summary of the Politeia in modern "rap" language! Or the Phaedrus, obviously. But also the Politeia, cause it's longer.
@Mitch Eww!
So obscene.
 
But for any relationship where one person is damaging to the other person, eventually one should realize the costs of this relationship and weigh them against the benefit. Like maybe two people are really in love, but one is monogamous and the other is not. And the monogamous one doesn't like that.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 yes, I agree. Good, mutual friendships are something that involve at least some effort on both parties (at least I think so).
 
12:12 AM
@Cerberus what? No, there was a gnat on my hand I was shaking off.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 agreed.
 
@Cerberus boogies
 
@medica OK. So...?
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Yes, a great imbalance doesn't work.
 
If the monogamous person feels they get a lot out of the relationship, they may stick with it, despite the drawbacks. If it causes too much pain, then they have to should cut loose.
The same is basically true for any friendship.
 
12:14 AM
@Mitch Suuuure. And the accompanying touching of body parts, that was completely innocuous too?
 
So, my question is, how can someone tell if people in chat are their friends or not? This is the chat culture aspect.
 
@Mahnax Very elegant and modern.
 
You can't.
 
@medica Let me have a go at it: Hey, medica, are we friends? :-)
 
@medica It's hard to be true friends in chat because this is all there is. People can be friendly. But are they really friends?
 
12:14 AM
I would like to think so.
 
People can be.
I have a friend I met in chat when I was 16.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 well, that's important. that's crucial to my question.
 
I admit to referring to some of the regulars here as friends, when I'm discussing things with outsiders. It's simpler than explaining chat.
 
We still meet occasionally.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 I think so. I consider multiple people friends, even though I may never meet them or interact with them much beyond this chat.
 
12:15 AM
OK. So far, really, so good.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Haha OMG same! I feel a bit silly when I do that. Because I don't think they would understand.
 
@Mahnax Yeah, I do too, but I sometimes wonder. How far does it go.
 
@Mahnax Manhax, can or should I consider you a friend?
 
If we all met for drinks somewhere, would we even be able to stand each other.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 I don't think it matters, really. There's obviously established friendships or relationships between many people in here—why worry about semantics? Let's all enjoy the company we share, make the most of things.
 
12:16 AM
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Have you ever done that?
@Mahnax +666
 
31 mins ago, by skullpatrol
13 mins ago, by Robusto
This isn't real life. It's the internet.
 
@medica By all means! It is of course your decision though.
 
@Mahnax I worry that it's too superficial.
 
Jan 30 '13 at 16:21, by Robusto
I just don't want to have "friends" like that. A friend is someone who will help you move. A real friend is someone who will help you move a body. A Facebook friend is someone who will find out where you moved the body and report you.
 
@Mahnax I'd like to consider you a friend.
@Mahnax I notice that you and Tom are friends, for instance.
@Mahnax Am I correct?
 
12:18 AM
@Robusto So what are we? "facebook" friends? Or does helping you close questions count as moving bodies?
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 That's your call, I suppose. I don't personally find my relationships here to be superficial, but that will be different for everyone. I try not to read too much into these things. For me, friendship doesn't need to be well-defined. Maybe it's different for you.
 
@Cerberus And, Cerb, you and Tom are friends, right?
 
Sure.
But you cannot ask such things.
Noöne could possibly say "no".
 
ok... but why can't I ask. Oh, ok.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 Haha +1.
 
12:20 AM
So it would be kind of impolite to ask in front of everybody, is it like that?
 
@medica Yes, we're friends—if you want to consider me one then do so. I already do likewise.
 
Merçi, mon ami.
 
@medica Yes, possibly
 
@medica A little. It seems to me that asking about personal relationships in such an open forum might come off as too probing.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 I thought this was more than Facebook. I just dredged up that reference because it seemed apposite. And because I'm kinda proud of the reference, and a shameless self-promoter, so . . .
 
12:21 AM
I want to ask a simple, but difficult for me to understand, question.
 
@Robusto We know!
 
And it's really important to me.
 
Sure, go for it.
 
Are women included in the chat friend comraderie?
Can women be?
 
What?
 
12:22 AM
@medica Yes
 
I can't even parse your grammar!
 
OK. Good.
 
There are, or have been, several.
 
@medica You know I'm a woman, right?
 
@medica Of course!
 
12:23 AM
yes, Kit. But I was hoping you weren't here.
 
This friend I told you about, whom I met on the Internet when I was 16, was and is a woman.
 
Now I'm really embarassed.
 
We first chatted for many months.
 
@medica raises eyebrow
 
She and her twin sister came to my 18th birthday, even.
 
12:23 AM
because my question is about you, kind of...
 
So, yes, you can make female friends online!
 
@medica nobody wants a friend named skull hence the name skullpatrol
 
My question is this, and it's rude, presumptuous, and out of line, but I hope you will forgive me for it.
 
But everybody wants a pal named skull!!
 
@skullpatrol I heard crossbones has a thing for you.
 
12:24 AM
@medica Why not ask in private, then?
 
@Cerberus pall? Or pal?
 
Ugh!
Pal!
 
Why did no one stick up for Kit when Robusto said he was "unfriending" her?
 
@Cerberus See? Before the 2-minute warning. But pall was funny in its own right.
 
12:25 AM
I mean, maybe it's because she's a woman?
 
@medica So this was what it was about all along? Shame on you.
 
facepalm
 
Maybe because she's not really a friend?
I'm really curious.
 
I thought we had just left this explosive topic, and now you are adding fuel to the fire.
 
@medica she's a big girl
 
12:26 AM
OK. That's enough. Game over.
 
Maybe I missed something.
 
Perhaps you and I can get into a fight over this, so people can forget the other fight!
 
Are things settled then?
 
Let's discuss whether balrogs have wings. I think there's still mileage on that topic.
 
@Robusto Heh it was! And thanks.
 
12:27 AM
@KitFox You shall not pass!
 
My left toe is hurting.
hits right big toe with hammer
Now I don't feel my left big toe any more!
 
@Cerberus get your left head to lick it.
 
Well, I'm trying to understand chat culture, because I'm new here, and I don't understand everything I see.
 
@Robusto No, no, must fight pain with more pain!
 
@medica watch and learn
 
12:28 AM
@medica Well, for one, I wasn't here when it happened.
 
That's exactly what I'm trying to do, and I don't understand it all, so I asked a question about chat friendships.
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 but some people were.
 
do more watching
 
@medica Well, for two, Kit is capable of taking care of herself.
For three, some people may have felt divided loyalties.
 
will I become enlightened about chat friendship etiquette?
 
@Cerberus There's a bug on your hand you slap it however you can to kill it. Also, sorry for hitting you.
 
12:30 AM
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 You must understand. I'm a doctor.
As such, I have dedicated my life to caring for people.
As imperfectly as I may do it.
 
@medica This isn't necessarily chat etiquette, it's basically the same real life.
Sometimes people speak up, sometimes they don't.
 
@Mitch It's OK. It was an assassin bug.
 
Let me tell you a terrible story about myself.
 
let me grab a cup of tea first.
 
When my oldest was about 4, we went to a community playground.
There were about 10 local kids *(I didn't know any of them) playing in the only sandbox.
My son really wanted to play in the sandbox.
 
12:33 AM
 
But he didn't know how to approach the group, many of whom were older than him.
So he did something childish and possibly unwise.
 
@Cerberus Damn you to hell for saying that.
 
He started singind a really funny song, thinking that his song would make the kids laugh and accept him.
 
we have a "sand box"
 
But it backfired.
Instead, one kid, about 11 years old, said:
 
12:35 AM
@medica Ya know, just because fb uses the word 'friend' doesn't make it like the real world.
 
(Directly to my 4 year old son) (in front of me):
 
@Mitch good point
 
Look at that. Shit that sings.
 
@Mitch What?? How dare you use the name of the Nether Lands in vain!!
 
Does that sound like a painful event to you all?
 
12:37 AM
no
 
@Robusto Aww don't.
@medica Extremely.
 
@medica kids are cruel.
people too.
 
@medica I figure this kid must have heard his father say that about a singer on TV.
 
@Cerberus You don't care for a piece of Cake?
 
Kids sometimes repeat things they think are funny for no reason.
 
12:38 AM
My son, my love, was being referred to, in frontt of all the other kids, as shit that sings
OK, this is the terrible part.
 
@Cerberus I do so, and your family too. to the nether 'lands'.
 
Can you imagine that there's something worse?
 
@Robusto I only knew the kind that clogs your arteries, but this one's good too.
 
I lost control of myself.
It was my first born.
 
@Mitch !!! And now you mock our efforts against the sea! You you...you live in the New Lands! There!
 
12:39 AM
I had had no similar experience with this kind of behavior.
 
@medica Not remembering these are complete strangers
 
Right. This is what I did.
 
I would have corrected the evil kid.
 
@Cerberus mouth agape
 
Me, an adult, a doctor, ...
 
12:40 AM
@Cerberus also some apoplexy, whatever that is
 
@Mitch Your lands? They are not old. They are...BRAND FUCKING NEW!!!
 
@Cerberus awaits flagstorm
 
@Mitch Not good, methinks.
@Mahnax Oops I did it again...
 
@medica holy crap... you did something.
 
I grabbed the 11 year old kid by his shirt collar, lifting him up directly to my face and I said to this 11 year old bully
 
12:41 AM
you should have grabbed your kid and left
 
I said: "You little fuck. I'm going to rip your throat out if you say one more word.""
 
Understandable. But unwise.
 
@Mitch agape means something different to a Greek scholar.
 
ASSAULT!!!
 
12:42 AM
This kid 3 inches from my face.
 
@Robusto glad I didn't use erato or however you conjugate that.
 
> . esp. love of God for man and of man for God
 
I was willing to fucking rip his larynx out from the front of his neck.
 
@medica what was his response?
 
@Mitch I don't think erato is a verb.
 
12:43 AM
His was more measured, doubtless.
 
It was one of the most shameful things I ever did, and (stupid me) I'm crying as I type it, at the memory of what I did.
 
Heh.
 
I'm so ashamed.
 
don't cry
 
His answer, or his larynx?
 
12:44 AM
trying not to but can't help it.
 
@medica It is understandable behaviour. Not good, but not so extremely unthinkable either.
 
@medica take a break please
 
I scared that kid shitless because he insulted my son.
 
@Mahnax I've seen flagstorms off the shoulder of Orion, flamewars gleaming through Tannhaueser gate
 
Anyway, not one of my prouder moments.
 
12:45 AM
@medica please?
 
I realized what I had done was horriffic, and my son and I left to play elsewhere in the park, alone.
 
@medica You are hereby absolved. It happens.
 
@Cerberus help me out here with my clever repartee.
 
@Mitch Heh, well, it was nice.
 
Well, it turns out that I reacted that way because I had been abused as a kid.
 
12:46 AM
@medica Understandable response but you're lucky the other mom wasn't there or police.
 
!!nuke
 
@Mitch Oh, the police? Come on.
 
Not something everybody needs to know, but my father (I know, right?) was an alcoholic who gave us the strap every week of my young life.
 
@medica the thought of someone "I'm crying as I type it, at the memory of what I did." is not what we want here, really. Take a break
 
12:48 AM
Whenever he was angry about anything, he gave us the strap.
I'm not crying anymore.
 
user61230
This chatroom is branching into a topic which is sensitive for many people, and isn't exactly on-topic. I'd advise carrying the topic back to something more relevant to the topic of the site, or casual discussion.
 
This is a more direct way of saying chill.
 
I'm explaining why I came here and asked these ridiculous-sounding questions
Not trying to trigger anything
 
user61230
I understand, but nevertheless, this is a trigger topic.
 
12:49 AM
@medica Yes, but this is causing problems for a lot of people. It's not exactly appropriate conversation.
 
@Cerberus Back to insulting the Orange. I bet you can't even grow Oranges there. Basically you live in a swamp.
 
trying to explain why I had this reaction
 
user61230
Once again, I understand, but this is not the place or time for such a discussion.
 
(there were fewer people when I started and I'm sorry.
 
@medica I think we have enough context to understand where you're coming from.
I think these mods are coming here to diffuse the situation.
 
12:50 AM
@medica why do you think strangers care?
 
@Mitch Did you mean defuse?
 
OK, may I just add one last thing, not about abuse
 
@Robusto Sure, that too. Is that an eggcorn?
 
@medica I think you should leave this line of conversation alone.
 
12:51 AM
I don't do well with bullies.
 
ok, enough said
 
@Mitch Okay, now I am curious, what is an eggcorn?
 
Not when they are 11, or when they are 81.
 
user116848
Hi guys :)
 
@Mitch Eggcream?
 
12:51 AM
Hello @Arrowfar.
 
@medica please?
 
@AshleyNunn Nice! I can explain!
 
user61230
@medica I am going to strongly advise you step away from the computer for an hour, just to calm down. Come back with a clean slate, and a fresh topic.
 
@Mitch We have more greenhouses than any other country in the world. I think. Or something. So we can grow anything we like!!
 
In linguistics, an eggcorn is an idiosyncratic substitution of a word or phrase for a word or words that sound similar or identical in the speaker's dialect (sometimes called oronyms). The new phrase introduces a meaning that is different from the original, but plausible in the same context, such as "old-timers' disease" for "Alzheimer's disease". This is as opposed to a malapropism, where the substitution creates a nonsensical phrase. Classical malapropisms generally derive their comic effect from the fault of the user, while eggcorns are errors that exhibit creativity or logic. Eggcorns ...
 
12:52 AM
I am finished.
 
An eggcorn is basically a malapropism but of almost identical phonology.
 
user116848
So you guys believe in satanic songs? Like this one of bruno mars "Locked out of Heaven"
 
'eggcorn' is an eggcorn of 'acorn'
 
So . . . an eggcream.
 
@medica thank you for sharing
:-)
 
12:53 AM
@Mitch Oh, I get it now! That's neat. :)
 
So, that pinned star about the sensitive topic can only serve to draw attention to this very conversation
 
'Hone in one' is a mistake for 'home in on' but is so close people hardly notice.
 
That's my "new learned thing for the day".
 
user116848
@Mahnax Hey :-)
 
12:53 AM
@Arrowfar I believe that Satanic songs exist, certainly!
Does Orpheus' song count?
 
@Arrowfar I believe that people talk about them.
Does that count?
 
user116848
@Cerberus Yeah :) They do I know
 
user116848
It does count. No?
 
@AshleyNunn Could you also delete my "Heh"? I was actually replying to Robusto then, but it looked like something else.
 
In linguistics, an eggcorn is an idiosyncratic substitution of a word or phrase for a word or words that sound similar or identical in the speaker's dialect (sometimes called oronyms). The new phrase introduces a meaning that is different from the original, but plausible in the same context, such as "old-timers' disease" for "Alzheimer's disease". This is as opposed to a malapropism, where the substitution creates a nonsensical phrase. Classical malapropisms generally derive their comic effect from the fault of the user, while eggcorns are errors that exhibit creativity or logic. Eggcorns ...
 
12:54 AM
@AshleyNunn Thank you!
 
@Cerberus Do you want it deleted, or just the star removed?
 
Thanks, everyone.
 
2 mins ago, by Robusto
In linguistics, an eggcorn is an idiosyncratic substitution of a word or phrase for a word or words that sound similar or identical in the speaker's dialect (sometimes called oronyms). The new phrase introduces a meaning that is different from the original, but plausible in the same context, such as "old-timers' disease" for "Alzheimer's disease". This is as opposed to a malapropism, where the substitution creates a nonsensical phrase. Classical malapropisms generally derive their comic effect from the fault of the user, while eggcorns are errors that exhibit creativity or logic. Eggcorns ...
 
Sorry for discomfort.
 
!!jinx
 
12:55 AM
@Mitch I didn't understand that. Use the !!/help command to learn more.
 
@AshleyNunn I mainly wanted the star gone, thanks! The transcript matters little, although, I guess, if you still have the tab open...
 
user116848
!!satanic songs
 
@Arrowfar I didn't understand that. Use the !!/help command to learn more.
 
@Mitch Except you owe me a coke.
 
@medica no problemo pal :-)
 
12:56 AM
@medica kinda serious. this is probably not the best forum for you. it is somewhat public. people here (to varying degrees) may be sympathetic, but also .... others. and also it's public.
@Robusto ha ha. I'm barely paying attention.. I didn't even see you post the link already.
 
@Mitch I don't understand why everyone's a shrinking violet all of a sudden. This chat room has had way more controversial topics.
 
English Language & Usage

The room description now changes daily. Subscribe to updates by sending money. Tögrögs accepted.
 
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 really? but that.. personal... and heart wrenching?
 
user116848
@Mr.ShinyandNew安宇 I watched a lego cartoon today :)
 
@Mitch we've had personal and heart-wrenching before too. People have come in here amid major personal tragedies and leaned on chat regulars' shoulders.
 
12:58 AM
@Arrowfar you know there's a whole lego movie that just came out.
 
@Mitch I still need to see that.
 
It's totally awesome.
 
@Mitch I got that for Father's day. Just waiting for the weekend to watch it.
 
Has every 8-year old in the world ben making that same joke?
 
user116848
@Mitch Yeah I watched that too :)
 
12:59 AM
@AshleyNunn It's really really good.
 
user116848
@Mitch But I tend to go for good tv serials
 

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