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5:01 PM
Hm, they do seem to name some of our alleys after all.
But you can still drive down them, or they would do no good.
The alley between Spruce and Pearl appears to be named Morrison Alley. I never knew that. It’s for business access, because you cannot drive cars or trucks on Pearl Street.
 
@Cerberus in reality too.
 
@tchrist Streetview?
What would you call this?
This is a borderline alley for us.
 
Summer came fast in Sweden this week, all the snow melted in a couple of days
 
Yeah, that's an alley.
 
That’s a paved alley.
 
5:04 PM
 
Its name is "Storm Alley", but it is just wide enough for cars.
 
@JohanLarsson omg!
 
So, yes, we call that an alley too.
@JohanLarsson Oh noes!
 
We have paved footpaths in some places, but those are not really alleys, are they?
 
You need high walls on both sides.
 
5:05 PM
@WendiKidd @Cerberus Not where I live (75 km away)
 
And it needs to be narrow. Two cars is certainly not narrow enough.
@JohanLarsson Phew!
 
I see lots of trees.
 
Here is an unnamed alley between Maxwell and Mapleton in a residential district to allow people to get to their garages.
 
 
5:07 PM
@tchrist Streetview?
 
@Mitch That definitely counts as an alley!
 
@Cerberus Walls? Huh?
 
No walls, no alley.
 
5:07 PM
Towns don’t have “walls”.
 
@Cerberus wrong. it's a street.
 
@Mitch ......I feel claustrophobic just looking at that picture
 
That’s a urban ugliness.
 
I feel fat looking at that picture.
 
@tchrist I don't know, I would call that an unpaved road? Definitely not an alley to me.
 
5:08 PM
or just in the way of a bicyclist coming the other way. Run! It's @Cerberus!
 
@Mitch Haha yes. Some alleys are officially called streets.
 
Most of the named roads have unnamed alleys between them to allow residents access.
 
And some streets are called 'alley'. But they're obviously wrong.
 
@Mitch lol
 
@Mitch Waaahhh watch out!
 
5:09 PM
Yes, they are sometimes unpaved.
 
@Cerberus does a Jackie Chan maneuver
 
But if you cannot drive down them, they are called paths, often bikepaths or footpaths.
 
I would never call what you showed me an alley, sorry. An alley is an urban thing to me.
Path, yes, definitely.
 
spider walks above crazy three headed bicyclist
 
But alleys are drivable, or useless.
 
5:10 PM
life is painful or boring...like a too thin alley with a bicyclist coming the other way.
 
@Mitch By the way, I want you to know that there are zero doors in that alley I speed through, and I slow down to a crawl by the time I reach the end.
So there is zero chance of my hindering or crashing into anyone.
 
I think it would be more impressive of a challenge if there were doors that opened on to that alley, with the door swinging out
that is 'not-boring' living
 
And do you think I would dare speed through it then?
 
@Cerberus I agree with your definition of alley.
 
Three or so hours until the cavalry arrives.
 
5:11 PM
 
@KitFox Hm?
 
@KitFox no naptime for relief?
 
@KitFox are you surrounded?
 
See the alleys between each pair of numbered streets?
From here.
 
@KitFox Have you bared your Thundercats sword and your Batman logo enough times?
 
5:12 PM
No naptime today. Naptime was yesterday.
 
@tchrist I see unpaved roads or paths...
 
@MattЭллен Yes.
 
@KitFox circle the wagons
 
I am doing a crappy parenting job today.
 
@MattЭллен Yay! And guns, lots of guns!
 
5:14 PM
@KitFox nah, it's just tougher today because you were so good yeaterday
 
@Cerberus That’s what we who live in actual towns call “alleys”.
 
@Cerberus yes! and bows and arrows
 
An alley or alleyway is a narrow lane found in urban areas, often for pedestrians only, which usually runs between or behind buildings. In older cities and towns in Europe, alleys are often what is left of a medieval street network, or a right of way or ancient footpath in an urban setting. In older urban development, alleys were built to allow for deliveries such as coal to the rear of houses. Alleys may be paved, or simply dirt tracks. A blind alley has no outlet at one end and is thus a cul-de-sac. Many modern urban developments do not incorporate alleys, but some may provide a se...
 
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
 
@MattЭллен And...scalping!
 
5:15 PM
He's stuck in Philly.
 
They oversold the flight, and told him too bad, you'll have to figure something else out.
 
that's sucky news
 
Oh no! For how long?
Can he book another ticket?
Or take the train?
Is that too far?
 
He doesn't know yet.
 
5:17 PM
Ugg.
 
It means I'll be lucky if he makes it home tonight, much less in three hours.
 
Aww.
 
shtoopid airlines
 
Could you get a sitter and go visit a friend, or sleep?
 
No on the sitter. I called and left a message at our friends' house.
 
5:21 PM
@Cerberus Towns do not have such things, so that doesn’t matter. We have these foreign things called lawn and trees between our houses, not urban blight. Therefore our alleys are pretty little lanes between houses.
 
Hmm maybe another sitter?
 
There is no other sitter.
 
@tchrist Perhaps it is local idiom, then.
 
@Cerberus It’s used throughout towns all over North America. That is not local.
 
@KitFox You don't trust those sitter agencies?
 
5:22 PM
What sitter agencies?
 
@tchrist Rural America, then.
@KitFox Are you sure there aren't any in your region?
 
@Cerberus No, there are no alleys in rural America.
 
@KitFox I've never understood how that works.
 
@Cerberus You don’t understand the difference between town and country?
 
You call them up, ask whether they have a sitter available. They supposedly screen all their employees. My parents used those agencies from time to time, I think. Of course they have to be reputable.
@tchrist I refer to Wikipedia, and that's the last I will say about this.
 
5:24 PM
@Cerberus No, I'm not sure. I'm too stupid to know.
 
@Cerberus: In the US, city or country, alleys are as @tchrist says. In Europe (UK and translations of continental such throughways), 'alley' is as you say.
 
@Cerberus So you think our towns are farmland and undeveloped open space. Very queer.
 
@KitFox I don't know what I would do. Could be worth a Google.
 
@Cerberus IN the US, the sitter agency is calling the local teenager.
 
Haha.
 
5:25 PM
It's true.
 
We usually had local teenagers.
But sometimes we had agencies.
 
And anyway, there is no other sitter.
 
Which employed local teenagers.
 
I live in the country. There is no agency.
 
My parents live in the country too...
 
5:26 PM
The CIA should be able to provide sitters to Americans at any time of the day or night
 
punches @Cerb in the faces
 
Although perhaps that would count as city for Americans.
@KitFox ! Ouch.
 
yeah, In Europe everything is more compact, compared to the USA
 
@MattЭллен Communist!
 
@MattЭллен Oh, I hadn't thought of that.
 
5:27 PM
@Cerberus Beast of the underworld!
 
@MattЭллен Yeah, and urban regions are also just counted differently, administration-wise.
@MattЭллен Guilty.
 
@Cerberus for you the unpopulated country means not a soul within 10 yards, nay even 20.
 
If you are in the country, you are surrounded by either farmland or undeveloped forest and field.
Towns are different.
 
Towns have roads.
 
5:28 PM
But Asia wins.
 
And towns have public utilities.
 
@Mitch Surely you mean inches?
 
@KitFox I bet their sitter service was axed during the property crisis. You can't rely on spies, eh?
 
@MattЭллен When the CIA sits, i_everyone is well behaved. and you cant see the bruises.
 
@tchrist true, true
 
5:29 PM
If you can turn around while standing, it counts as deserted country.
 
@Mitch because they use waterboarding
 
Deserts are different.
Country is not deserted. It is simply land that has not yet been destroyed by man.
 
@MattЭллен like a cheap hairwashing
 
What would you call this?
 
"Were the kids any trouble? Oh and you washed their hair. Here's a little something extra"
 
5:32 PM
My parents' house is there in the distance.
 
@Cerberus flat. duh. gimme another.
 
@Cerberus Countryside.
Not a town.
 
@Cerberus wait..there are other houses there, right?
that's a 'hamlet'!
 
This is the street. You can see the house on the left in the first picture too.
 
How long does it take you to get to the nearest downtown area?
 
5:35 PM
By car, about 10 minutes? Depends on what you count as downtown?
Shops, supermarkets, cafés.
 
I dunno. Where you buy food.
 
google image search processing...
 
We pluck our food from the trees.
Okay, the nearest supermarket is 5 minutes by car or so.
 
address found...
 
The bigger supermarket is 10 minutes.
@Mitch Haha, good luck with that...
 
5:36 PM
authorities dispatched...
 
@Cerberus If that is in town, it is a street. If it is in the country, it is just a road.
Which is odd. I never thought of that.
 
authorities arrived...
authorities have entered residence...
 
So Orbitz finds me a 26hr one-way flight with two stops for $1500 from Philly to here.
Sounds great.
 
@tchrist Well, I don't know what it is, country or town.
 
authorities exiting...
 
5:38 PM
@Mitch Wow you guys are fast! What are you there for anyway?
@KitFox Waaahhh...
 
"The pie was great, your mom has some really great stories about you. We'll be back next week... she's making tarts!"
 
Is this ^ country or town?
 
I see what you mean.
 
also some very embarrassing baby pictures.
 
Hard to say.
 
5:40 PM
Village? Settlement? Does it have public utilities for water and gas and sewer and such?
 
There are towns nearby, and some industry, and pastures.
 
Maybe we could visit our other friends.
 
You really don’t have buildings that close together in the country proper.
 
"some"? that's a totally developed area, it just happens to have a field in the middle of it.
 
Right.
Countryside is unstained.
 
5:41 PM
@tchrist Even the most far-flung quarters of the realm have gas, water, and usually sewers too.
 
Well, no. Wilderness is. Countryside can have farmland.
 
Even lonely farms.
We have some (carefully curated) wilderness.
 
@Cerberus How could a farm possibly have gas and sewer?
 
You just dig in a pipe?
 
@Cerberus Can’t be wilderness if it’s curated, now can it?
 
5:42 PM
@tchrist It's the best we can do!
 
You are so small, so overpopulated.
It changes perspective.
 
Perhaps lonely farms don't have sewers.
But they will always have water, electricity, and gas.
And telephony.
 
Well, I guess I can count the hours until bedtime then.
 
true, my folks used to lived a few miles out of town and they had a septic tank. so their mess was collected.
 
> A wilderness, in contrast with those areas where man and his own works dominate the landscape, is hereby recognized as an area where the earth and community of life are untrammelled by man, where man himself is a visitor who does not remain.
 
5:43 PM
Five more hours.
 
but, yeah. mains water, electricity and phone
 
@KitFox you need an outing.
 
I don't know where to though.
 
It sounds like you have nothing left untrammelled by man.
 
pond. ducks. swingset. or impromptu playdate
 
5:44 PM
I'm exhausted. Very little sleep last night.
I'm trying on the playdate, but no one home right now.
 
@Mitch pnd?
 
@KitFox hugs
can ducks take care of children?
 
Adding to my frustration is that I haven't heard back from the doctor yet either.
 
@tchrist yeah 'pnd'
 
They are occupying themselves with a laundry basket right now.
And a jump rope.
So I might could put my head down for a little bit.
 
5:45 PM
@MattЭллен yes. from experience. ponds however are not good care takers.
 
good, good
 
@Mitch pained, pand, paned, pawned, penaeid, pend, piend, pind, pined, poind, pond, pound.
 
@KitFox too young for go carts? rollerskating? potato cannons?
how about candy land?
 
Candy land, yes. The others are too much effort.
 
@tchrist ever read Ella Minnow Pea?
 
5:47 PM
@Mitch Nay.
 
Chutes and Ladders?
They all end up in tears though.
 
I wish our friends were home, or that my girlfriend weren't having her stupid family birthday party today.
@Mitch Eh, they do alright.
But they are playing fine at the moment.
The sun is even poking its head out finally.
 
@KitFox I was speaking for myself.
 
Hahaha.
 
I know! Monopoly is the worst.
 
5:49 PM
I could brave taking them out to dinner by myself tonight.
 
@MattЭллен My parents used to have a tank too!
 
We have septic.
And will when we move too.
Well water.
Propane in a pig.
 
@tchrist Anyway, i's an epistolary novel and Oulipo novel where they work together, the scifi conceit is that the government ruled that some letters of the alphabet couldn't be used.
 
Cool.
We have a well at the country house.
 
and the plot hinged on somehow little y littel more letters were removed.
 
5:50 PM
I think in the village we'll have public water.
 
Which is really unreachable by public transport, so that should count as country.
 
until all that was left was l,m,n,o,p (get it?)
@Cerberus That's not a well, it's a cistern.
ha ha, I'm trolling you.
 
@Cerberus One of our buses in Boulder goes up to the ski area in the mountains.
 
that's not a cistern. it's a brothern
 
No, a transtern.
 
5:51 PM
or maybe a transtern?
jinx
 
Slow jinx.
 
@Mitch !
 
@MattЭллен Cisterns are like lesbian brothels.
 
I am slow
 
@tchrist A bus on a mountain? Nice.
 
5:52 PM
I need some company.
You guys just aren't cutting it for me.
 
Aww.
We understand.
 
@MattЭллен I would laugh except I don't get it.
 
transatalantic corporeality is hard
 
5:53 PM
I know.
 
@Mitch cis- trans-
 
@MattЭллен I appreciate the effort.
 
@MattЭллен and takes hours.
 
@tchrist A bus from Nederland to Boulder? I'll hop on!
 
And vice versa.
 
5:54 PM
Decant your brandy!
 
@MattЭллен ha ha. like Gaul!
or Jordan!
 
I never knew we lived along the same bus line.
 
or fats!
 
yes
I'm not sure about Jordan or Gaul
 
Actually, there is a village America here, no joke.
 
5:55 PM
what is it like? Do they have a McDo?
 
And a village Nederland too. And a village called Amsterdam.
 
@Cerberus Actually, the Hop goes elsewhither.
 
Oh! My husband may have gotten a ticket to a different airport.
holds breath
 
@Mitch Who knows! It's tiny.
@KitFox Yay!!
 
crosses fingers
 
5:56 PM
Our bus routes are named things like HOP, SKIP, JUMP, BOUND, DASH, and BOLT. Somebody thought they were cute.
Mine is the Skip line.
 
America () is a town in the Dutch province of Limburg, originated in the late 19th century. It is a part of the municipality of Horst aan de Maas, and lies about 16 km northwest of Venlo. It shares the name with the American continent. In 2001, the town of America had 991 inhabitants. The built-up area of the town was 0.21 km², and contained 397 residences. Including the surrounding countryside, America had 2190 inhabitants as of 2006. Gallery File:Rowwen_Hèze_fans_in_America,_Limburg,_Nederland.jpg|Rowwen Hèze fans in front of the town sign of America, Limburg File:Grubbenv...
 
It connects to the strip club.
Sounds smelly.
 
> Not to be confused with Amerika ( [in the province of] Drenthe).
 
How confusing.
We also have a bus service called the Stampede.
Well, it’s more fun than numbers, I guess.
 
Hi @KitFox
 

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