stop the merry-go-round - 2019-06-28 (page 2 of 3)

I am trying to create an example of a query execution plan which shows that if I have the cardinality estimation for some column of a table I can decide which query execution plan has the least cost. So I have these two posts (1 and 2) which I can understand estimated cardinality as the number o...

Joe Obbish

where could we find one of those

Paul White

2:17 PM

But seriously look here's the proposal: with great effort and risk to personal well-being, briefly lift that heavy weight off the ground, then return it to where it was.

What is the point of that.

Joe Obbish

begin the hunt

@PaulWhite you forgot to mention after years of doing said activity you still don't feel good enough

Taryn

@PaulWhite it feels good

yeah. nah.

Endolphins

also: so does heroin

2:18 PM

I think that's what they're called anyway

Taryn

@PaulWhite well, that's not good for you

Paul White

so long and thanks for all the fush

Erik Darling

@PaulWhite with great effort and risk to personal well-being, open windbg and watch a single thread for the next 30 minutes

Paul White

@ErikDarling minimal effort, zero risk, maximum reward. you suck at this

@Taryn sounds like you've been listening to so-called "doctors"

George.Palacios

Even the risk of falling asleep is actually a reward

Paul White

2:20 PM

sleep is the ultimate state of well-being

Erik Darling

@PaulWhite if i were less lazy i'd go find some choice quotes of yours in the heap about debugging

Taryn

@PaulWhite that's great, if sleep comes easy

Paul White

that's what wine is for

I thought this room was for experts

You lot know nothing

@ErikDarling all I can hear now is a sort of high-pitched squeaking

Erik Darling

well i'm terrible at databases so i try to be good at lifting things up so hopefully i'll be useful at some point

Joe Obbish

@PaulWhite I blame lax room owners

George.Palacios

2:23 PM

@ErikDarling Why don't you deadlift the servers

Two birds. One stone.

Paul White

@JoeObbish they let anyone in. even the bouncers do

Erik Darling

@George.Palacios won't let me in the datacenter anymore. too many incidents.

@PaulWhite i have never approved a single entry

Paul White

@ErikDarling I'd like to believe that, but your credibility is at an all time low right now

George.Palacios

@PaulWhite One day I'll be an expert and you'll eat that transcript

Joe Obbish

I think Josh is the last person I approved. Not 100%

Paul White

2:24 PM

George the Guru

Erik Darling

@PaulWhite check the transcript

Joe Obbish

at the time I felt I was taking a BIG risk

George.Palacios

I was more thinking Doctor DBA because my initials are GP

Paul White

@ErikDarling that is the basis for my statement

Erik Darling

@PaulWhite i hope a snake confuses you for an australian

Paul White

2:25 PM

well there's no need for that kind of talk

maybe your endolphins are too high

Max Vernon

@PaulWhite hey! I've done that 27 times. The point is it's fun.

Josh Darnell

@JoeObbish And now?

Paul White

@MaxVernon until the parachute fails to open

there are better ways to have fun

George.Palacios

@PaulWhite It's even funner then. Just for a lot less time

Max Vernon

@PaulWhite that's what backups are for. You do have a backup, right?

Joe Obbish

2:26 PM

@JoshDarnell you've earned your place

Paul White

@MaxVernon you've got my back up, bub

Max Vernon

lol

Joe Obbish

although perfview doesn't work on my home PC right now and I'm waiting for you to fix it

Paul White

@JoshDarnell now he lives in fear of the day you overtake him

Josh Darnell

@JoeObbish \o/

@PaulWhite Ha!

Paul White

2:29 PM

in about 6-8 weeks, if my calculations are correct

Josh Darnell

So Meta.

Is that from your graph.

Paul White

@JoshDarnell I had to compensate for acceleration no longer being a constant

Star Trek 4: The Voyage Home (10/10) Movie CLIP - Not In His Nature (1986) HD

►

1986!

jesus

George.Palacios

That was before I was a thing

Paul White

newness detected

George.Palacios

I'm not like, 12 lol

I'm 12 and a half

Paul White

2:42 PM

Josh must be feeling pretty good about now

George.Palacios

I'm actually 27

28 in a week

Erik Darling

do you even have neck tattoos yet?

George.Palacios

@ErikDarling no but I managed to grow some facial hair

and then chop it off repeatedly

Paul White

discussion point: would jrdba.stackexchange.com be age-based?

Erik Darling

chuck-e-cheese

Paul White

2:46 PM

Indiana Jones And The Last Crusade Don't Call Me Junior Scene 1080p HD

►

2

George.Palacios

@PaulWhite That's fine but then dba.se still gets the 50 year old developer who "sometimes works with databases"

Josh Darnell

@PaulWhite Now I'm older than more people than just Joe!

Erik Darling

@PaulWhite best movie

Paul White

proudly presented in 1080p

@George.Palacios sounds like you're biased against 50 year olds

George.Palacios

Probably. We all have our biases

Paul White

2:48 PM

@JoshDarnell time to cut the cord!

@George.Palacios you just accepted an answer from a 50yo

and he got the best details in that answer from another

Joe Obbish

not being SA is terrible

Paul White

migrates GP

George.Palacios

More a point that age doesn't necessarily mean wisdom

Paul White

@ErikDarling far and away the best

Joe Obbish

I can use a user-defined table type in ad-hoc code, but I can't use it as a TVP

George.Palacios

2:50 PM

although that couldn't possibly apply to anyone here

Max Vernon

@PaulWhite all my best details come from you. I stand on the shoulders of giants, and aren't afraid to admit it.

Joe Obbish

in other words, Max steps on you

Paul White

I ... aren't?

@JoeObbish everyone does. it's a tough life

Joe Obbish

@PaulWhite I for one will put plastic bags over my shoes before stepping on you

Paul White

@MaxVernon You're not actually 50 yet are you?

@JoeObbish I will remember that

Max Vernon

2:53 PM

@PaulWhite 50.515 years old today

Paul White

@MaxVernon Oh I thought you were younger than I am

Josh Darnell

We should require everyone's name and age to be in the room description.

Paul White

Also good to see they've adopted decimal years in Canada

@JoshDarnell We failed to even enforce pictures

Max Vernon

precision is a good thing™

Josh Darnell

Not only will it help us remember who is older than whom, it'll be easier for advertisers to identify us without resorting to full screen ads or whatever.

George.Palacios

2:55 PM

@MaxVernon (5,3)? Let's hope you don't hit 100

overflow error then

Paul White

Do we know how old @Erik is?

Max Vernon

@George.Palacios I must admit I'm hoping for decimal(38), but realize it's most likely not going to happen. I'd settle for decimal(6,3) though.

Paul White

I'm guessing 36

Lamak

@PaulWhite 36?

Paul White

Let's compromise on 36

Joe Obbish

2:58 PM

I'm inserting 31 rows into a temp table. allowing parallel insert adds 2 seconds to the run time

Lamak

sounds good to me

Paul White

I'll be 32 in a couple of weeks ish

Hexadecimal, unfortunately

Joe Obbish

data isn't even 1 MB

Erik Darling

@PaulWhite 38

Paul White

sounds like a problem only people with plastic bags on their shoes would experience

@ErikDarling oh, ta

Joe Obbish

3:00 PM

@PaulWhite 2016 SP1 says otherwise

Paul White

sounds like something only a person with plastic bags on their shoes would say

Erik Darling

3:11 PM

shoeless joe obbish

3

Paul White

jade on the soles of his non-existent shoes

Erik Darling

i recorded a video about OBFUSCATE_FOR_SEQUENTIAL_KEY to get some heat off chat

George.Palacios

@ErikDarling obfuscate? Sounds like an interesting feature

Paul White

thats-the-joke.gif

George.Palacios

@PaulWhite sorry imgur is blocked here I can't see that

Paul White

3:16 PM

@George.Palacios did your network admins fix that then?

Unfortunately haha

@ErikDarling link

processing

you need faster hardware

Erik Darling

youtube processing

blame google

it will be here eventually

OPTIMIZE FOR SEQUENTIAL KEY

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2

George.Palacios

3:21 PM

What is this, a video for ants?

Erik Darling

quality will improve over time

they all look like shit when you first upload them

Paul White

NADAULTRA

360p right now

Google needs better hardware

Erik Darling

maybe you can send them your old laptop

Paul White

no I don't like to help others

2

George.Palacios

I was reading about AWS minimum compute node size the other day. It's a shipping container

Smallest unit they deal in now

Erik Darling

3:28 PM

is it a g-unit?

Josh Darnell

1

Q: Counters to distinguish Insert Hotspot / Page Split by seeing PAGELATCH_EX

Insert hotspot and excessive page splits are common reasons for PAGELATCH_EX. What are the other counters that can be used to confirm whether the wait is from insert hotspot or page split? Note: I am using SQL Server 2012. REFERENCES sys.dm_os_wait_stats

sql-server performance performance-tuning waits

tumbleweed rolls by

Hotspots are obviously a common and critically important problem.

Paul White

Great video, Erik

Josh Darnell

@ErikDarling Upvoted.

Paul White

1080p available now

Josh Darnell

Wow all the extra p really makes a difference.

Erik Darling

3:32 PM

oi thanks oi

@JoshDarnell yeah you can really feel all the extra pness

2

envy

brb dying

resurrection josh

Ha he said resurr.

Mar 18 '18 at 16:12, by Paul White

The Cult - Resurrection Joe

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...

SQLBunny

1 1

naw

Erik Darling

3:46 PM

cute bunny though

Paul White

very

Josh Darnell

Is it a mischievous bunny?

Erik Darling

aren't they all?

Paul White

not so far

Yes! You translated it correctly! Pretty much says 'Thanks for always being with us", not exactly 'beside' but more like supporting~ — SQLBunny 6 hours ago

seems topical

Josh Darnell

Comment answer!

And you said not so far.

Paul White

3:50 PM

Not on our site so

Anyway the point was the k-pop reference

Joe Obbish

@PaulWhite it does, doesn't it?

Paul White

@JoeObbish yes

Joe Obbish

@PaulWhite what k-pop reference?

Josh Darnell

@PaulWhite I got that =)

Erik Darling

@JoeObbish try reading the transcript

Josh Darnell

3:53 PM

Good golly it's like 10 lines up.

Joe Obbish

I don't see it

Erik Darling

12 now

Paul White

@JoshDarnell Plastic bag must have slipped up

Joe Obbish

I have to go to main to read something? that's not reading the transcript

Paul White

Oxygen deprivation

Joe Obbish

3:54 PM

that's like saying Paul's bio is part of the transcript

Paul White

@JoeObbish it's on korean.stackexchange.com

can you imagine working with Joe

or driving his bus

Joe Obbish

@PaulWhite L_____ N_______________ does, as you know

Paul White

does he have a plastic bag on his hat

Joe Obbish

negative

Paul White

I wouldn't say that, jaded perhaps

Joe Obbish

3:58 PM

@PaulWhite the real treat is being in meetings with me

Paul White

never gonna happen

"good golly" is a terrific phrase

I might adopt that

Joe Obbish

good thing I'm not an MVP then

maybe Paul is putting his thumb on the scale

Paul White

@JoeObbish why?

Joe Obbish

what if there was a product feedback Teams meeting?

Paul White

I don't use Teams

Joe Obbish

4:01 PM

not very community-minded

-5 MVP points

Paul White

I'm a thought leader not a follower

Lamak

"thought leader"...nice

Paul White

well until 1 July anyway

Forrest

@ErikDarling not finding your stream :(

Erik Darling

it's up!

with audio!

Paul White

4:04 PM

44 mins ago, by Erik Darling

OPTIMIZE FOR SEQUENTIAL KEY

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Lamak

@PaulWhite then you are gonna become an "actions leader"?

Joe Obbish

Lamak asking the hard hitting questions

Paul White

@Lamak seems unlikely

Josh Darnell

Does Microsoft hiring everyone mean my MVP chances go up by attrition?

Paul White

Yeah there's quite a few slots opened up this year

Joe Obbish

4:07 PM

@JoshDarnell you need to be nominated

Josh Darnell

@JoeObbish So I've heard!

Paul White

I nominate Josh

for new MVP

Joe Obbish

like Paul would willingly do paperwork

Lamak

@PaulWhite isn't the nomination things closed for now?...

Paul White

@Lamak I wouldn't know

@JoeObbish we have the internet now

Lamak

4:08 PM

@PaulWhite ah...I mean, you would...but you don't

Joe Obbish

right, makes it take longer

once a piece of paper is printed even developers can't mess that up

Paul White

@Lamak right

Josh Darnell

@PaulWhite newness increases 😅

I assume Paul typing that into chat counts as an official nomination.

Like Michael Scott declaring bankruptcy.

Lamak

@PaulWhite yeah, heard that there will be quite some MVPs that won't get renewals

Paul White

@Lamak See you on Reconnect 😀

Josh Darnell

4:11 PM

Good golly 1 July sounds stressful.

Lamak

yeah, sad thing to do on tuesday

Paul White

@JoshDarnell Known as F5 day

Lamak

didn't know as that...but I like it

Josh Darnell

@PaulWhite Heh, wow.

Like waiting on a package from Amazon.

Well here anyway.

Paul White

I don't find it stressful at all, but I can quite see why people would.

If anyone took any notice of me, no one that wanted the award would get it.

Lamak

4:15 PM

yeah, no need to stress about it...

Paul White

it's a bonus

actually I wouldn't mind getting the 10-year disk, but hey

Lamak

@PaulWhite I don't get what this means...english is getting harder

Josh Darnell

@PaulWhite Hm, that makes a lot of sense.

Lamak

@PaulWhite I have quite some years ahead of me for that

Paul White

@Lamak I think it's essentially the same as the 5-year one

Lamak

4:18 PM

I see...still some years ahead of that one

Paul White

@Lamak well the award is about how much you give, not what you get

@Lamak It's the same as the others but solid blue and says "5 years" on it

Lamak

@PaulWhite yes, I agree...I just don't understand your sentence :/

Paul White

@Lamak I mean that if you want the award, you probably don't understand properly what it's about

and also that I have zero influence

Lamak

@PaulWhite aaaah...ok, I get it...and it's true

Josh Darnell

😬

Paul White

4:22 PM

@Lamak have you been to MVP summit?

Lamak

@PaulWhite yup, first time this year

Paul White

yes I went once too, just for the experience

and to buy a Microsoft shirt from the company store

Lamak

lol. I liked it, though...even more so because my company paid for the trip

Paul White

well that no doubt helps a lot lol

and yeah it is a good time

aside from the rain

Lamak

didn't rain this year

Paul White

4:28 PM

oh they moved it from Seattle? 🤣

Paul White

4:47 PM

@Servy A few hundred people on meta don't get to set all the rules for tens of thousands of people who don't want to participate here, mainly because of how abrasive this place can be. You're arguing a consensus that exists plainly in your perception, and I can see why you'd defend that, but you're in an echo chamber that's much smaller than you might realize. — Tim Post ♦ 38 mins ago

Tim's doing a great job there

/s

Josh Darnell

I don't envy Tim at all.

Joe Obbish

applying that line of reasoning to moderator elections sure is an interesting exercise

Erik Darling

when your first line of defense is telling someone they're in an echo chamber...

"this entire community is an abrasive echo chamber" is code for "i'm not capable of self-reflection"

Joe Obbish

I'm sure that people don't participate on meta simply because they want to focus on answering questions appreciate being lumped into the "silent majority" which apparently prevents progress from being made

Transcript for

♦ stop the merry-go-round