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1:00 AM
@JoeObbish it's fine, i just wanna know what you get for MemoryNode id
 
I will support your PASS application if you get a damn haircut
 
i get 1 (id = 0) on my crappy computers
 
oh, yeah
I was digging around in the XML
four sets of results
10 or 11 each per memory node
 
@sp_BlitzErik Your crappy computers? looks sadly at unopened parcel
 
0 to 3
auto soft-NUMA is off if it matters
 
1:01 AM
@PaulWhite UNOPENED
 
@sp_BlitzErik Will open with wife later after chores
 
@PaulWhite I plan to get one within the month
 
Food shopping day
 
so what does Paul White support look like?
 
@JoeObbish You'll need to cut more than one hair
@JoeObbish The Illuminati
 
1:02 AM
I'm going to go on vacation to NZ
and stand on your lawn
 
entry denied - hair too long - biosecurity hazard
:)
 
the smoker is describing me as a biohazard...
 
@JoeObbish vaper
You are not helping your chances right now
Anyway, why do you want to speak at Summit?
 
make Erik proud
I want him to be in the front row
wiping tears from his eyes
 
Ok fine
 
1:05 AM
oh, did you want a real answer?
I am willing to supply one
 
i'll only be there for the precons again (potentially)
 
REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEe
 
@sp_BlitzErik The rest of the week is largely pointless
Inside the summit anyway
 
@PaulWhite is there any property for sale on your street?
 
@PaulWhite go on
 
1:06 AM
@sp_BlitzErik Actually yes, though only technically on the same street address, it's nowhere near really
@JoeObbish The evenings can be fun depending on who you hang out with and where
 
I had fun last year
 
Yeah but you were a first timer
 
I mean after
not during
 
after what
 
after sessions were over for the day
 
1:08 AM
ah
Summit lacks useful technical content
There are only so many times I want to hear an indexing intro
 
I will be part of changing that
 
it's all about developers
according to pass board meeting minutes
 
@PaulWhite I'll agree with that
if you could have given your talk five years ago
without changes
it shouldn't be allowed
@PaulWhite That's a bit too pessimistic? Depends on who is speaking?
 
@JoeObbish I'm not saying zero useful technical content
The bar is probably lower if you're not travelling very far
 
i can't imagine what the presentation would have to be about for paul to learn something
unless i present about pete shelley songs
 
1:13 AM
@sp_BlitzErik It's true though
 
I bet I could teach Paul stuff
 
I aspire to be as good with the debugger as Paul
 
@sp_BlitzErik I don't necessarily want to learn anything, though that's always nice, I just want the talk to be interesting.
 
the issue is that he could figure it out himself if he cared to know it
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft why do you need the debugger?
 
@JoeObbish It's extremely useful
 
1:14 AM
The best times I have had a conferences were as part of a small group chatting about internals over a beer e.g. with Bob Ward, Paul Randal, Conor C, Itzik B-G
 
even with source code access?
 
interesting
 
Source Code only tells you how things should work but not in what order, where they are coming from, etc., unles all you do all day is look at it
 
Postgres is open source and nearly no one reads it
 
1:15 AM
Like, how many threads can you have doing Blah
 
Also the source code is vast right
and complex
 
you can't always match up 100% of references
 
well that's true across the board
there are good tools for searching it
I'm not one to talk though
 
There are, and I use them
 
I just make developers explain things to me
 
1:16 AM
however, when I look for something like the XE question
 
to save the effort
 
That's straight forward because it's an error on a limit
 
I read the Postgres optimizer planner source in the past couple of days. Laughed.
3
 
however, what wasn't straight forward is that's just one limit
 
@PaulWhite what were your big takeaways?
 
1:17 AM
So you have to look at virtual functions that are overloaded across billions of lines of code
 
@JoeObbish It was written by devs. It's more of a non-optimizing compiler than an optimizer. Very limited.
 
When most of the code is preprocessor directives written in C or converted from inline assembly, it gets rough real quick like
 
#pragma wtf
 
"There be dragons"
 
@PaulWhite just add a CTE
that'll fix your issue
 
1:18 AM
Here's some code I wrote that emulates the style...
 
@JoeObbish Right, and it helped me understand exactly why CTEs are an "optimization" fence in PG. It lacks the framework to do proper reasoning/exploration.
 
#define LockType(x) x##_Lock

#define Lock \
	LockType(Shared),\
	LockType(Exclusive),\
	LockType(Update)

enum Locks {Lock};
 
sometimes there's a fine line between a bug and a feature
 
That's a PITA to search, no matter what the tool
 
Or who the tool
 
1:20 AM
hehehe
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft you should put it in a sql server database
and use full text indexing
 
that's actually one of our tools
So... joke's on you
 
> mfw no face
 
I also write stuff to see if my laptop would support newer functionality a while ago, so SQL server does stuff like this too:
 
I think I got no chance of being accepted at summit
 
1:22 AM
	__cpuid(iCPUInfo, 1);
	std::cout << "Your process supports cmpxchg16b: " << ((iCPUInfo[2] & 4096)>>12) << std::endl;
 
well, I already knew that
but the whole "What are the submitter's previous speaking experiences?" thing... not good...
 
@JoeObbish I think you have a chance
 
it's not a good resume
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft The SIMD implementation is "fun" to walk through too
@JoeObbish I think you have every chance tbh
 
Didn't you just do.... like 5 events?
 
1:23 AM
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft I'll have at least five by the time summit arrives
can't list future events though
 
@PaulWhite Yeah, and each processor has different returns depending on family and whatnot... ef my life
@JoeObbish So that's a morality issue
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft It made me feel a bit sorry for my processor
 
If you were CHOSEN to speak at those events, you've already been chosen, however the act of speaking has not yet occured
 
Like it was missing out on the cool kids' games
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft yeah but they want to know how many people attended
 
1:24 AM
@PaulWhite LOL someone wasn't able to use all the Columnstore goodness then
 
I could put 0, which would be true
but again, doesn't make for a very impressive resume
 
Personally, I'd make up a number
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft Most of it, I think, but honestly it gets hard to be sure.
 
I know that's one of the ways Columnstore gets its speed boost
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft Yeah an estimate is OK
 
1:25 AM
ventorized SIMD
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft Your typing LOL
 
I EFFING HATE THIS EFFING KEYBOARD
 
heh heh heh
 
I don't have this many mistypes on my mechanical
but this Lenovo keyboard isn't worth its weight in dirt
 
@PaulWhite was this to me?
 
1:26 AM
is about to move to Lenovo
@JoeObbish Indirectly
 
What'd you have before? Chicklet keyboards are the bane of my typing existence.
 
Dull (Dell)
 
hmm
I always wondered what happened to computers sent to be recycled
I see they go to NZ
 
@JoeObbish I always wondered what happened to missing words in chat
 
I am under the weather
 
1:27 AM
hehe I wondered if you were going to say something
 
@JoeObbish Reduce, reuse, recycle
 
all I got from chicago was two mugs and an illness
who the hell needs two mugs?
the speaker room had t-shirts
 
@JoeObbish Well you have to have sex to get an STD so... we know it wasn't that
 
I thought, great
women's small only
 
We're all under the weather, unless in an airplane I suppose
 
1:28 AM
huge stack of them
 
It'd fit that 170 pound frame of yours well then
 
I WONDER WHY THERE WAS A HUGE STACK OF THEM
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft I deserved that
 
Lack of diversity
 
except I'm tall
 
@PaulWhite But.. but.. women in technology...
 
1:28 AM
but good effort
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft Right.
 
I don't see a women driving taxi cabs lobby
or women in hard manual labor construction lobby
 
I don't see any women in this chat room
 
Because you didn't look in the mirror
 
I'm all for freedom and equality of opportunity.
 
1:29 AM
Ditto
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft have you seen my beard?
 
@JoeObbish Said the "woman" in chicago
 
But if it turns out females in general prefer not to get into tech, I'm fine with that
So long as it represents a free choice
 
@PaulWhite I don't care who or what you are - that's personal and this is professional. If you're amazing, I want you on my team. If you're shit, I don't want you on my team unless you're willing to learn and we both have the time to get you up to speed.
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft A+
What a depressing room. Beige.
 
1:31 AM
@PaulWhite how so?
 
Seems gloomy.
 
@JoeObbish Who is the leader of the sunday advocates cult speaking in the front?
 
ha!!!
 
There is a freaking cross above your head
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft I didn't pick the venue!
 
1:32 AM
@PaulWhite what happened recently that has your hackles up about the pc stuff?
 
You're lucky he was facing the camera, side-on he is invisible
 
you guys suck
 
It's all love
 
at least I speak!
 
@sp_BlitzErik Nothing specific, just an accumulation
 
1:32 AM
@JoeObbish you got me there, I always get shot down
 
@JoeObbish Get back to me when your accumulated speaking hours beat mine
 
hoooooooooooooooooo
 
@PaulWhite I'm not old, don't hold it against me
 
@JoeObbish You just have an offset, don't let it go to your head
 
it's all lost to history unless you keep going...
 
1:34 AM
@sp_BlitzErik He loves it really
 
"Paul White WAS an amazing speaker, but I never had the privilege of seeing him speak"
isn't that sad?
 
@JoeObbish Can I watch one of your recordings?
 
do you want your fans to feel that way?
@PaulWhite you got like two
add up the hours on those
 
About four?
You?
 
I'll top that in no time
 
1:35 AM
We'll talk then
 
I got over four planned this year already
 
@JoeObbish Recorded?
 
don't be obtuse
if I want to watch someone speak
I can either see them live or watch a recording
the point is there's no opportunity
that's why it's so sad
 
The point is you don't get to tell me what to do. Or rather, I get to ignore your opinion on the matter.
 
don't be sour
 
1:37 AM
I just want to actually meet Paul, I like meeting the people in the community no matter how regal or not
 
huh, well that was unexpected
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft yeah this
 
how many have you guys met?
 
decent amount
 
Less than Erik but most likely more than you
 
1:38 AM
pretty unhelpful answers...
 
i got to hug fabiano amorim at bits. he looked terrified.
 
Unless you take away all the MS people
 
I'm at... 3?
depends on how you count it I guess
as in, seeking out someone?
 
Yeah we'd need standards
Like if you don't count MS people, and don't limit it to speakers
I've met hundreds
 
did you know them beforehand?
 
1:39 AM
A few
 
that's my rule
 
the only reason I met Erik was because of this site
 
me too!
 
I got on to help the community and he's all "You going to be there?"
 
"I'll be there! (TM)"
 
1:40 AM
I will not, I can't be chosen as a speaker
 
stop moping around
you want us to start a gofundme?
 
I don't mope, I get even
@JoeObbish Yes please, I need a server
 
getting even would be quitting your job and speaking there
 
Yeah, I've thought about it TBQFH
Also because I want to move to Ireland
 
well that'll make it tough to meet people
 
1:42 AM
... all the open positions require you to already be a citizen
 
what community events do you do?
 
I've spoken at a few SQL Saturdays in California
 
but you live in florida
and you hate california
 
I used to live in California
among about 6 other states
I move every year or two
 
you should speak in Wausau
 
1:43 AM
2018 is a move year
 
I'll be there
they'll probably be desperate for speakers
 
I doubt they will pay for flight + hotels
I'm not Paul White popular
 
Mr Rock Star wants the VIP treatment
 
or Erik popular
Well I'm not paying 1200 myself to go speak
that's a new server
 
I'll chip in
what kind of a dinky server is that?
 
1:44 AM
You don't even have money for food?!
 
what? yes I do
 
Then why are you so skinny?
I swear if I can count your ribs...
 
You mean why am I a healthy, strong American?
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft you don't wanna be me popular --basically the bass player
 
@sp_BlitzErik you're in the band though, even bass players get groupies
@JoeObbish I think we wear the same shirt size
 
1:46 AM
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft not the good ones -_-
 
I wear M or L
 
anyway, wife looks annoyed, time to get outta here
 
I'm a solid schmedium but generally wear M
@sp_BlitzErik She's pregnant and a women, she's always annoyed
 
that hardly means anything
 
plus, you're her husband so...
 
1:46 AM
there are like four shirt sizes
@sp_BlitzErik good luck
 
Buena suerte mi amigo
We might also have the same waist size
 
doubt it
 
or 33. don't remember
 
1:49 AM
if we have the same waist size how can you criticize me?
 
WE WEAR THE SAME CLOTHES AND YOU CALL ME TINY
because you have like half a foot on me
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft exactly, that makes you tiny
 
at least you can be comfortable flying
 
I wish I was better at art, I'd totally photoshop the crap out of this picture
@JoeObbish No one is comfortable flying
night night
 
1:59 AM
good night
 
 
17 hours later…
6:35 PM
This room is just a barrel of fun today.
 
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft I've been defeated by the scheduler
it behaves whenever I observe it
and doesn't behave when I don't observe it
 
So, this....
In quantum mechanics, Heisenberg's uncertainty principle (Heisenberg's indeterminacy principle or simply the uncertainty principle) is any of a variety of mathematical inequalities asserting a fundamental limit to the precision with which certain pairs of physical properties of a particle, known as complementary variables, such as position x and momentum p, can be known. Introduced first in 1927, by the German physicist Werner Heisenberg, it states that the more precisely the position of some particle is determined, the less precisely its momentum can be known, and vice versa. The formal inequality...
Now known as, The Obbish observation challenge
 
it's hard to come up with testable theories
maybe there's something about memory which is important?
 
we see really screwed up looking memory distribution on numa nodes during runs
 
6:41 PM
Do you get debug output that says, "make the bad man stop!"?
 
I've tried a lot of different things with simple test queries, but it always does pretty well
 
7:03 PM
Honestly I'd love to look into it from the code side but I can't commit that kind of time right now for community work
 
7:17 PM
> mfw when you're just another community member to sean
no it's fine, I'm not expecting anything like that
 
You know I like to help
Plus, I'd learn something new
If I was better at debugging I could just hook up and run something
then inspect the code path
 
I wish there was more documented about it
there's a blog post from ten years ago that mentions that it can happen in some rare scenarios
but no details
I have no idea if this is by design or if there's some kind of race condition
let's say I configure the VM to be a 1 x 64
I know that it's terrible from a performance point of view
but if I still see the scheduling issues then that tells me something, right?
 
7:37 PM
> configure the vm
> vm
goddammit
i had a client this morning, and i've been slowly blogging about stuff in cu5
 
hey
you get me 64 cores in one processor group
on bare metal
the power of VMs is to make it easy to configure the system in bizarre ways
 
what's the significance of 64?
 
you can't have more than 64 in a processor group
don't ask me why
 
Because that's the current limit on a K-Group in Windows
I wrote that 2 years ago
I don't think people really care (or need to in most cases) about internals
 
8:01 PM
@SeanGallardy-Microsoft internals of what?
 
Windows, SQL, etc.
 
it would be great if I didn't have to care
get to work ;)
 
LMFAO
well played, well played
 
8:38 PM
what are you buttheads doing
 
who me?
or MSFT buttheads only?
 
all buttheads
 
9:01 PM
i wonder where paul has been
too absorbed with his new laptop probably
parsing deadlock xml is frustrating
@JoeObbish do you have a CS deadlock demo i can use to get this stuff? support.microsoft.com/en-us/help/4089473/…
 
10:00 PM
> The WaitType and synchronizingAt attribute values are internal. But they can be used to help Microsoft Support troubleshoot an issue.
Waiting for Erik or Joe to say something snickedy
 
10:13 PM
i'll give you something to troubleshoot internally, handsome
 
> mfw Erik calls me handsome
 
That's professional level drinking right there
@sp_BlitzErik My TravelSox came today
Trying them now...
 
damn that was fast
 
prime shipping
Thanks to an ex-gf who keeps me on the account as part of the household
 
10:20 PM
lol
i have prime, but i ordered mine from woot
 
That's right, I was that amazing
The woot was over :( still wasn't bad at $9.50 for the socks
 
they're kind of a hassle to get on, but whatever
 
> kind of
understatement
but I'll take that over a blood clot
 
live and learn~
writing documentation stinks
 
Why do you think we don't do it anymore
 
10:25 PM
i figured you ran out of interns
 
Nah, that pool of fresh millennial blood doesn't run out
 
so what you're saying is
you keep getting older
but they stay the same age
 
/touches nose
All I'm saying is the people that I know which only eat meat are the skinniest people I know
Although, to be fair... one of those people is a 38 year old Japanese female that also drinks her body weight in alcohol per day
I don't think she weighs more than 80 pounds
 
does she spend a lot of time throwing up?
 
10:33 PM
that's something else
did i mention writing documentation sucks?
 
No, please tell me about it
I need a better chair, this one is causing me all kinds of back issues I believe... taking suggestions
 
i have a steelcase gesture
 
10:55 PM
conversation killer apparently
 

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