Wait a minute, it's quite clear at this point to me that in the macroscopic situation, some self energy terms are lost. There may be a way to show that this is negligible for simple substances , perhaps non dielectrics?(clarification needed). (My reasons are simply that textbooks simply spam that formula everywhere) But I read in a paper
arxiv.org/ftp/arxiv/papers/1312/1312.3383.pdf that one of the key macroscopic energy relations is actually postulated?