@Nzall And because of events like this where state-backed Chinese hackers attempted to hack into Google

It kinda makes me uncomfortable when I read through threads on Kavanaugh and there's some commenter being all "not all frats are bad" and opening with "my fraternity had a good reputation for not having a rape culture".

Makes me think of Chris Tucker's bit on being a good parent.

Which then makes me think of how that same stand-up bit has been misused for racist purposes.

@Yuuki Kavanaugh threads have a way of people showing their casual patriarchy supporter colors

if not straight up misogyny

I mean, it's not really that.

It's this misconception where a questioning of culture is interpreted as an attack on the individual.

And there's also something there where the commenter subconsciously cops to the whole "frats encourage rape culture" thing.

it's straight up a #NotAllMen with some variables swapped out

Institutional discrimination and abuse is a hell of a drug.

So Kavanaugh did an interview, with his wife, with Fox News, which will air tonight? C'moooooooon

@TimStone can't wait for tucker's thoughts on this... "Kavanaugh didn't whip his dick out on me so clearly..."

I uh

🤔

wut

this is a worse shop than the sharks

I mean presumably the people sharing it don't think it's real either, more "symbolic", or something? They have to right?

So with that in mind what does the comment even mean?

@TimStone is he supposed to be rescuing someone or handing the guy a MAGA hat?

i can't even tell if this is a pro trump or anti trump shop

jfc

@GodEmperorDune I think...inexplicably the latter?

And why did they add those extra smiling people to the left?

@GodEmperorDune IT'S BREAKING MY BRAIN

@TimStone LOL THEY LEFT THE AUSTIN MARKING ON THE BOAT

Part of me wants to know who made this to understand if it's intentionally bad or absurd symbolism or what

The other part of me hates everything

@TimStone i agree with this part

@TimStone when poe's law generates memes

Oh my god this is just going to be the worst of weeks

o7 mr president

@TimStone #GrittyWillSaveUs

@GodEmperorDune It's dangerous to be in a hurricane, take this.

@Yuuki #MakeAmericaGrittyAgain

Heh

I am extremely here for hockey fans getting irrationally angry at gritty for existing

I reiterate my earlier position on this matter

@TimStone "Turns out, literally everyone the Republicans have named for every office has sexually abused someone."

@Yuuki i have seen people complaining about this and using it as evidence of "media bias"

I mean, it's a nuclear take but there's a disturbing number of GOP office holders or candidates involved in sexual abuse accusations/scandals/etc.

@Yuuki yes, and any abusers in positions of power need to be removed from those positions, regardless of party

@Yuuki It's almost like a large number of GOP politicians are narcissists who believe they're above the law

one party has a better stance on this than the other, but dems have fucked up on this too

not nearly as badly though

And also that they're better than other people and thus don't have to do silly things like get consent

@SaintWacko or figure, mostly correctly, that enough money and power will make their crimes not a big deal

@GodEmperorDune this is, incidentally, why the "well, hang on, we can't get rid of franken" takes are Fun

@Unionhawk yep, removing franken was necessary and this is why

Can I have a No Dumb Questions with a side of No Offense Meant moment?

(Not really related to the topic at hand, but I wasn't sure whether to ask in Bridge or TIF)

@Yuuki yeah TIF probably better suited for it

assuming political or newsy, anyway

@GodEmperorDune Eh... not really either of those, I'd say, but who knows what counts as political these days.

> Hawley is one of 20 GOP state officials who joined a federal lawsuit earlier this year that could end Obamacare and those protections.

🤔

> Hawley and his top aides have refused to explain any details of his involvement.

I mean, I'm pretty sure his involvement is joining the lawsuit, for starters, so 🤷

Anyway, I'd like to request a large helping of good faith for asking this question if possible.

@TimStone bruh if you did that in high school then you would be confirmed already

Even in that clip he acts smug as hell

Like he keeps talking about his life-long whatever as if that entitles him to anything

What are perceptions on a cis-gendered individual in a relationship with a trans-gendered individual having hang-ups on sex? Is that something the cis-gendered person should've dealt with before entering the relationship?

@Yuuki imo the biggest part of relationships is communication

so start there

going to the partner and saying "fyi i have these hang ups that i'm trying to work through, what do you think, how should we proceed" is generally good

as for when to do it, that probably depends on the relationship specifics and only the people in the relationship can figure that out

and not all relationships have to go to a sexual level

sometimes it's that people like spending time with each other and be more that just friends and have romantic dates without sex playing any part of it

but yeah i'd fall back on "try to communicate as honestly as possible with your partner". if you can't (or don't want to) communicate effectively, your relationship is not going to grow stronger

I suppose I have pre-conceptions that a romantic relationship will eventually broach sex at some point.

@Yuuki that is the norm but not like a rule

So the idea that someone having hang-ups with having sex with their partner entering into a romantic relationship with said partner is a bit jarring to me.

a lot of these things are like independent sliders on a menu

sex from none to all the time is one of them

romance from none to all the time is another one

aromantic relationships exist, as do asexual relationships, as do aromantic & asexual relationships

as far as resources to read up on such things, i am not aware but searching for "ace" (asexual) and "arom" (aromantic) communities might have something

I think maybe you can also have a subconscious hang-up, where you get into some situation for the first time and abruptly realize that it makes you uncomfortable

yeah, part of me growing as an adult has been hitting those uncomfortable spots and then interrogating why it makes me uncomfortable

(and sometime i don't have an answer for that immediately and i get it weeks later)

@Yuuki it's also possible for 2 cis-gendered individuals to have hang-ups on sex. I think the keyword here is "individuals" and each case should be treated individually

@Yuuki I have never done dating, so for me, it has always been friendship first and then at some point you realize that you are in a romantic relationship. I guess it's different if you enter the relationship with romantic interests from the get-go

@Yuuki recognizing the jarring feeling of the thing itself is also a better (if more difficult) road to go on instead of immediately rejecting it as well

it is a lot more emotional work to figure these things out

@GodEmperorDune That's definitely something I might have to look into. One thing I'm worried about with asking the relevant communities is having people jump down my throat because of some possible pre-conceived notions though.

@Yuuki lurk before leap is a good idea here. taking the time to learn the lingo and reading through FAQs and whatnot can demonstrate that you are trying to do the work

I would bet on things going OK with the asexual and/or aromantic communities if you approach it with a good attitude of trying to understand their feelings and experiences.

It's more of a question for the trans-gender community though.

Well, now that I think about it, I suppose not really.

(also FYI you don't need the dash in transgender)

putting the problematic nature of virginity aside, i don't understand how being a virgin has any bearing on the allegations of what he did. Putting your dick in someone's face against their will doesn't equal intercourse, neither does holding someone down and groping them. Sexual assault is a more expansive term than just penis in orifice.

also purity culture as a whole (and the obvious signalling he is trying to do here) can go in the sea

"it's only rape when penis in vagina" can get into the sea

@Yuuki yes, extremely this too

I get that “oh that’s sexual assault”, but there’s that implication of “well, it was sexual assault but at least it’s not rape” that can get into the sea.

@GodEmperorDune Wait, so his former girlfriend character witnesses will also attest that they never had sex, or?

Seems like a weird ledge to walk out on idk

@TimStone trying to get some support from the evangelicals

But they already bought into the "it was no big deal" excuse so like why are we even doing this?

rubs temples

@TimStone so that tomorrow someone can come forward with "i had sex with kavanaugh when he was in high school and/or college" and do another news cycle

@TimStone should be rubbing your veins instead in preparation

@TimStone I think the point is to have every possible excuse to cover their bases

@murgatroid99 "i was on the moon at the time, with steve"

@murgatroid99 yeah :/

A summary of this case, and this administration in general

It's called "The Narcissists Prayer". I'm not entirely sure what the original source is, possibly this

@GodEmperorDune (it's a late thought but also "Incels 4 Kavanaugh")

@TimStone :/

@Yuuki a bit belated but I can pretty much reiterate what @GodEmperorDune and @Chippies said. Romantic asexual relationships are totally a thing, whether because one or both people aren't interested in sex or because of other reasons (medical issues, not sexually compatible with each other for whatever reason, etc). Sexual hangups are a thing even among The Cishets™. The main fix is lots of

communication and, in my experience, lots of cuddles.

@ToxicFrog can i use "The Cishets™"?

@GodEmperorDune Not exactly a refutation of that type of behaviour!

@GodEmperorDune Feel free.

@TimStone i'd think they'd already be on board because they are pro sexual assault

Right, I meant more that assuming we believe the claim he just says he didn't, not that he didn't want to, and we know what kind of rhetoric is common in those circles now, hard to say things were any more respectful at the time 🤷

@TimStone qwhite interesting

mmm I hope we don't hear about this man again

His direct stare at the camera there is a little off-putting!

> #gritty looks like guy fieri

lololol

@TimStone i told you to prep your veins

Yeah, he was mentioned in the article but him putting his face out there and reiterating it is solid

@TimStone i guess hatch was at the party and saw who did it?

Are you saying a grown man couldn't have been witness to a random teenager par...oh, oh dear this is going off the rails

Ah ha

another hottie avenatti fail

Still seems like he went a few steps too far though

It's also not 100% clear from Avenatti's accusations-as-questions if Kavanaugh is reported to have actively taken part, I think? I'd have to double-check

Yeah, the questions carry a possible implication but it seems to mostly be establishing that he was present and aware of the situation at a place where this happened

avenatti's stuff is usually worded very specifically like if you were trying to imply things to a jury without really lying

just like how a lawyer does it

@GodEmperorDune Yeah, the only thing he suggests Kavanaugh himself actually did to a woman was "sexual conduct" while the woman was intoxicated and/or under the influence of drugs, which is a fairly nondescript act

The rest is about asserting Kavanaugh was present but not necessarily a direct participant in a gang rape

we'll see al capone's vault on wednesday

Also apparently Kavanaugh is refuting that he was frequently drunk?

But like, dude, your yearbook literally makes multiple references to what are clearly binges

why are you keeping your passwords in google docs and/or trello?

laughs in interns

No one told them about password managers and this is where it gets us

yeah this is one thing where my company/team is decent in our internal wiki

everything is "here's the username", go look the password up in system Y with this criteria

@TimStone Ah, okay:

He better be very sure he didn't do it because he's not leaving himself very many fallback defenses!

@TimStone there goes the blackout "defense"

(which, good, get in the sea)

(i.e. it was still your fault for getting blackout drunk)

Oh yeah, it's bullshit but he'd probably find an unhealthy amount of support for the position :|

@GodEmperorDune How the mighty have fallen