God, I am a little annoyed of RPG.SE right now >.>
I asked a question there 2 days ago Which asked for clear objective advice. But instead it received a lot of answers from new users joining through HNQ and all of them ignored the actual question and stated their opinions on the backgroundstory. So it got closed for being opinion based. I made a meta post, that it actually isn't asking at all for what the posted answers offer. After that I made an edit removing the sections not important for the question, which generated the opinions and it got reopened. 10 hours later, it got closed again by a moderator with the reason "It still generates …
I am tempted to just post the exact same question again without any background info at all, and if people ask for additional info I tell them Go **** your self... >.>
Attention all IPS members, this is a public service announcement: May I ask y'all to be a bit more proactive in downvoting stuff if you vote to delete something that's still at a positive score in the review queue? :) We're getting quite a few autoflags saying the post has delete votes but a positive score, and when I look some have 6 delete votes, 1 downvote and three upvotes or something... If people downvoted a tad more there'd be less work for us mods (and we're naturally lazy so...)
I'm learning about Appium (for automation testing of mobile apps) and the number of things I need to install and learn before being able to actually wrote any code makes me want to scream ><
Plus my manager wants me to do a demonstration of Appium to him next week, but I'm definitively not ready ><'
@avazula Well, hopefully, I will be able to make at least one test before my manager asks me anything. I have at least until Tuesday to find something to say/show
Heya. I am somewhat not comfortable with the edits made to this post. interpersonal.stackexchange.com/q/21209/32 given that my coworkers are around on SE aswell. I am not too sure they might stumble on it, and I had prefered not giving these infos too open. I mean in the end I had no problem with being confronted with it, but I'd prefer not to contribute to that.
So are these info in the end absolute neccesary? If so, leave it as it is now.
I am downloading a lot of stuff for android studio and it's taking soooooooooo long! Plus, I would like to edit the tags of some old questions, but I already made my five edits for today >< I guess I will just edit the tag description instead....
@Rainbacon Not sure the mods will be okay with that :p After all, the problem was that the home page had too many old questions on it. Changing the person doing the edit wouldn't change that fact ^^
@scohe001 Me too lol. It would be nice to stage some answers when the question is a bit more difficult to answer. I think I can live without it though.
Yeah, that's true. You'd have to cross-reference with meta and the main site. Would get pretty difficult to manage
Plus someone could post on meta and then someone who didn't even see the meta post answers with a similar idea... no way of knowing if they're correlated
I'm considering answering this question because it doesn't really address the problems of the OP very well (at least to me). Any thoughts on this? interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/21218/…
It would be nice if we had a bit more workshopping of answers, but the incentives of the SE format make it impractical, I think
There is a noticeable premium in upvotes for being first (or, at least, an early answerer on a question), with answer quality being a related-but-not-decisive attribute.
I feel like there's a problem with Stack Overflow, as the number of people prowling it increases.
Each question's answers are sorted by descending score and then by descending time of posting. This means that if a person sits down and answers a question in a long, thorough way, going through eve...
I agree. I think if we wanted to have good workshopping of answers there would have to be a change in the flow of posting an answer and the way that answers are rewarded
There are also other issues around how much people care about question/answer quality, how open they are to critiques, and how patient they are. It's hard
@scohe001 Also, sometimes, a few people post very similar answers within a few minutes of each other, and you don't know who should delete their answer.
Hey all :) I'd appreciate it if you could check out my answer (the one I wish to have sandboxed lol): interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/21226/23099 I'm a bit hesitant about it since the question I felt was kinda all over the place.
@Upper_Case Well I slightly touched on the topics of reestablishing trust and creating a stronger communication channel. Which is what I really think the OP should do... Idk if I went back and forth between the two (confusing), because that question was mainly focused on talking to her about the men she's talking to.
@Anilla Yeah, I read it as a modest frame challenge. The specific issue the asker describes (the messages to the men) seems pretty clearly to not be the issue. Dealing with the messages directly is fine if that's what the asker wants (that was the aim behind my comment on the question), but it seems unlikely (to me) that that actually is the asker's real concern
@Upper_Case Yeah, that's what I figured too. The other answer also concerned me with how they encourage approaching the GF about each instance she was talking with another guy. I feel that's going to be too accusatory and aggressive and not really help the OP's case.
@Anilla I agree, it reads as a bit passive-aggressive to me and assumes that the girlfriend values and interprets the messages in the exact same way as the OP, which seems unsupported
@Upper_Case Hehe, that worries me too lol. Maybe they were just excited to receive feedback. Or, they were just desperate to find a solution. Thinking about things like this really makes me realize the power we have when answering these questions. It's scary and amazing at the same time.
@Anilla Yeah, I think that one of the most common things askers are looking for on IPS is validation that their perceptions are correct and that their goals are awesome. In this case it really seems (again, to me) that the OP wants to confront the girlfriend about the messages, specifically, regardless of anything else
It doesn't seem productive to me, but it's the OP's game
@Upper_Case True, I have noticed that quite a bit actually. Some OP's are really receptive to frame challenges though, which is great since often times it can improve their overall situation.
@Anilla I think you answer is pretty good. One suggestion to make it better would be to move "Start establishing trust, openness, and a good communication channel." to a spot earlier in the post. Right now your answer reads as "Take x, y, z actions. If you do then you will accomplish these goals." I think the answer my read a little more clearly if you start with "You need to achieve these goals, and here are steps that will do those things"
@Rainbacon Thanks for the feedback! :D My goal there was more of a recap / conclusion type of deal. Maybe that takes away from the Q/A format we have though. I'll see if I can adjust it a lil better
Delete your LinkedIn, put your phone number in a do-not-call-me registry and enjoy the silence. And IF they call you, you can threaten legal complaints! :P
I applied for a job last week and had a phone interview set up only to find out that a recruitment agency posted the job and my phone interview was just so that they could pitch me other jobs. I talked for 30 minutes with the recruiter and he sent me 3 jobs and asked if I'd be interested, I didn't look much at the requirements since I figured they wouldn't send me them if I didn't meet them. Responded that they seemed interesting and to go ahead and proceed with my application.
Got a message this morning that I don't meet the requirements for any of those jobs, but to please look at this other job that I don't meet the requirements for
You don't want them to keep wasting your time, so standing up for yourself in this case was all you could do. And letting them know your frustration this way is a good warning too ;)
I just found an old deleted answer that is a pretty good answer to the question it's on. The poster deleted the answer because it was edited to remove a small paragraph that was merely a meta-commentary on the topic of the question. I feel as if the post itself shouldn't be removed from the site, but the OP wasn't comfortable answering the question without the commentary. Should I flag for undeletion?
Sure, but I'd have to ask other mods how to handle it ;) I'm guessing the answer will be that we don't undelete answers that OPs delete, unless it's done in attempt at vandalism (which usually raises an automatic flag for us anyways)
But for the future: the question involved the possibility of a physical relationship. The answer had some information related to the question, and then at the bottom a small paragraph about how non-marital sex = bad. That part got removed, and the op immediately deleted the answer.
@Rainbacon I haven't seen the answer, but I would guess it might be more along the lines of the poster believes that non-marital sex is wrong, and does not want to be associated with it. I don't think someone should be made to associate with something they are against.
In any case (though this wouldn't work as well on Interpersonal Skills as it would on some other sites), if there is a deleted answer that contains valuable content you can always turn that content into your own answer and mention that you got it from a deleted answer.
If you really want to you could post an additional answer. Or let someone else turn it into an answer. Or let the answer languish in deleted oblivion forever.
Ironic, as I'm in the middle of writing an answer to a question that I've already posted an answer to.
I think we should lean towards respecting the posters' wishes. I find it a bit odd to delete in a case like this, but it's not very cool to take content someone else doesn't want up here and then unilaterally make sure that it's present
@Rainbacon I adjusted the wording slightly to try and make my answer flow better. Though, I'm not sure about the transition between my comments of the situation and the actual resolution to what the OP is asking for.
Title: Why do we avoid excuses or explanations when providing an apology?
Tags: apologies, conflict-aversion
Motivation: I'd like this question to help others understand the interpersonal reasoning behind a good apology and why it's performed the way we recommend.
As I've answered several q...
Title: Why do we avoid excuses or explanations when providing an apology?
Tags: apologies, conflict-aversion
Motivation: I'd like this question to help others understand the interpersonal reasoning behind a good apology and why it's performed the way we recommend.
As I've answered several q...
