The Awkward Silence

apaul

00:44

The f word there being "forum" in case people missed the joke...

Extroverted Main Man

02:45

0

Q: How to approach Co-Worker who seems to avoid talking to me?

So, I recently started working and so i'm new to the workplace. I came in around the same time as the girl who sits opposite me (she has about 3 months on me). That being said, my first two weeks in, i had lunch (in a group of 4-5 people) and talked with her a few times after work on the way to ...

Extroverted Main Man

03:21

0

Q: Breakup etiquette/ interactions with Ex.

I had a break-up a number of years ago in which I feel that I was treated badly. There are a number of reasons why, but my main gripe is this. It was a serious relationship: it lasted a bit over four years, exclusively for all but a few months, and we had had many discussions of our future togeth...

relationships rejection

IPS Comment Bot

03:50

You hear from her every couple years? I'm baffled. Hard to imagine breaking up with someone, being unable to face them and then going out of my way to make punctuated appearances in that person's life when I couldn't be bothered to have a final rship chat years earlier. I'm unsure if she is a) rude; b) oblivious; or c) Didn't feel as heavily connected to the relationship all along and therefore honestly doesn't think it was a big deal and thinks you shouldn't either. But I just don't understand why she shows up every couple years. I'd permanently end all communication. But that's just me. — Kathy Smith 1 min ago

#10229 Kathy Smith (139 rep) | Q: Breakup etiquette/ interactions with Ex. (score: 0) | posted 33 minutes ago by Geardaddy (1 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["you\\W(really)?(need\\Wto|should)"]

apaul

04:28

@Catija You around?

Catija

No?

Yes.

Damn.

A J

I am around.

apaul

Still wondering if it's ok to take a hatchet to this: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/10219/59

@Catija Like more than half of it could go without being missed... I'll take your silence as permission ;)

Catija

I don't really have time to read that.

apaul

@Catija Eh, you're not missing anything important. The whole personal commentary thing is about to disappear.

See, much more digestible now.

@Catija Although... The author of that one seems to have a habit of writing that way, so you may wanna take a look when you have time to kill.

@AJ I am a round too, I should probably hit the gym more often.

Extroverted Main Man

05:10

-1

Q: Self Confidence and feelings of inadequacy in friendships

How do I feel confident in a friendship when I am afraid the friend likes other friends better than me?

relationships

Extroverted Main Man

07:14

0

Q: Should I change my attitude or way of talking based on the group conversation I have?

Background and Briefs: I have been told multiple times that I don't make good jokes and usually "bore" them with poor comments and also I am the most frequent user of English words in the group which was reduced much as due to opposition of many people and Now , In a recent incident one of my f...

conversations apologies social-media chatting

A J

07:26

Afternoon!

Tinkeringbell

morning

A J

what's up?

Tinkeringbell

Breakfast ;)

And I'm annoyed, the train got delayed because there was someone getting sick on a platform...

A J

Lunch here.

:P

Tinkeringbell

Warm lunch? Or sandwich lunch?

Nice :) What sort of food are you having?

I wish breakfast was warm too... :(

A J

07:29

Just Indian things

Tinkeringbell

Yeah, that'll help broaden my horizon! :P

I'm having a Dutch breakfast :P

Sid

@Tinkeringbell how much delayed?

Tinkeringbell

Enough to just miss the connection and spend 10 minutes on a cold platform... A 7 minute delay ;)

I guess I'm lucky they just implemented 10 minute trains..

Sid

@Tinkeringbell 7 minute? That would mean it was on time for people here

JAD

@Sid but if it makes you miss your connection, it makes it too late

@Tinkeringbell you might want to unpin this: chat.stackexchange.com/transcript/message/42700443#42700443

Tinkeringbell

07:36

@Sid Oh, here they mark every train with more than 5 minutes delay as too late for the statistics...

@JAD Wanted to do that yesterday, but that rocket distracted me :)

Done :)

JAD

@Sid may I ask where you are from?

Tinkeringbell

@Sid but we can only claim for refunds if the delay is over 30 minutes ;)

Sid

@JAD my profile has all the info I can share over here

JAD

@Sid ok

Sid

Why though?

@Tinkeringbell refund for the cost of your ticket?

Tinkeringbell

07:40

@Sid Yes...

If it's between 30 minutes and 1 hour you get 50 percent of the costs, if it's more than an hour you get a 100 percent refund

Which adds up if you're travelling first class :D

And, added benefit: Although the boss pays for the travel subscription, I get to keep the refund money :D

JAD

@Sid I was wondering about the extensiveness of the train network where you were

Sid

Hmm that makes sense. But I am pretty sure train network is extensive here

I think it speaks volumes about how late trains can be if I say that one time I reached the station at 3:55 to catch a train scheduled to reach the station at 3:25 and still had to wait for a good 15 minutes before the train arrived

JAD

To show how busy the dutch rail-network is: spoorkaart.mwnn.nl

Tinkeringbell

07:56

@JAD Nice, I didn't know that existed...

JAD

Love that map

I'm following a delayed intercity from utrecht to maastricht

maybe I shouldn't do this

IPS Comment Bot

Your question is a bit unclear: You need to be part of the chat to get information about school events? The chat also contains personal conversations? People in the chat want to exclude you, claiming your attitude is the problem? What exactly is your question: Do you want to know if you are at fault? Do you want to know how to not seem "boring/annoying"? Do you want to still get Information in a environment where you feel bullied? — TheSexyMenhir 2 mins ago

#10234 TheSexyMenhir (101 rep) | Q: Should I change my attitude or way of talking based on the group conversation I have? (score: 0) | posted 54 minutes ago by The Rare Empathist (54 rep) | edited 33 minutes ago by A J (5142 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["you\\W(really)?(need\\Wto|should)"]

Tinkeringbell

@JAD You're stalking me

9:06 's Hertogenbosch?

JAD

nah, it just arrived in utrecht actually

Tinkeringbell

Oh...

I just had to switch at 's Hertogenbosch from the train to Venlo to the Intercity to Maastricht ;)

JAD

08:07

but I found yours :p

Tinkeringbell

Apparently there's some sort of switch defect

@JAD LOL, I'll make sure to wave! :P

A J

@Tinkeringbell LOL. I just had Chapatis, Potato Mix and Curd.

JAD

Some problems north of Breukelen from the looks of it

lots of cancelled sprinters

according to this you just passed the A65

Tinkeringbell

Yep...

JAD

and vught

Tinkeringbell

08:09

Just noticed that out of the window ;)

We're now at the Vught platform ;)

now just past it

JAD

hmm, then you're a bit delayed

vs what the map shows

xd

Tinkeringbell

hahaha ;)

I'll make sure to file a complaint! :P

JAD

hmm, this uses the arrival and departure info from NS

that's only accurate in minutes

when updated that is

Tinkeringbell

Aha.... yeah, then we're a few seconds behind schedule ;)

Is it okay to tell people on the train they have a body odor??? Or is it better to just tie my shawl in front of my nose?

JAD

I think etiquette in the train is as follows:

Don't talk to people no matter what

especially during rushhour :p

Tinkeringbell

08:12

@JAD Wish everyone knew that!

just yesterday there was an older women that was completely.... 'krankjorum'... started a rant and didn't stop, even though no-one paid attention.

In the end, I ended up twittering NS to send the conductor over

JAD

say hi to the people in Boxtel :p

Tinkeringbell

Hahaha no... People will think I'm weird :P

JAD

Hmm, I always wear headphones, so I usually just ignore people

Tinkeringbell

I have noise cancelling headphones, they didn't block the crazyness

A J

So, are you following each other? ;)

Tinkeringbell

08:14

JAD is stalking me :P

JAD

@AJ well, following me would be easy, since I'm sitting at my desk

Tinkeringbell

He's got a website where he can follow all the trains in the Netherlands ;)

A J

Oooh! Not a good idea @JAD :P

@JAD LOL

JAD

23 mins ago, by JAD

To show how busy the dutch rail-network is: http://spoorkaart.mwnn.nl/

A J

@Tinkeringbell Ohh

Killed the chat. :P

Tinkeringbell

08:17

No you didn't :P

but I was distracted by a news article :)

IPS Comment Bot

As said previously it's quite a broad question, if you can't narrow down what you want, please at least keep in mind that because you're ok with yourself and your sexuality, he may not be, and/or have to deals with some troubles on his side too. Regarding how it seems to mess with your mind (you oversleeping everyday, etc..) you should consider seek professional help to talk about it, and have someone helping you to learn how to deal with this kind of situations. — Alexandre Audin 1 min ago

#10200 Alexandre Audin (191 rep) | Q: He hasn't texted me in 4 days after a date. What should i do? (score: -2) | posted 12 hours ago by Big Don't Know (1 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["you\\W(really)?(need\\Wto|should)"]

Tinkeringbell

Well, I've gotta go :)

Bye!

A J

@Tinkeringbell See ya

Sid

08:47

(Sorry for any delayed replies. In class right now)

@JAD that is cool

Extroverted Main Man

09:00

0

Q: How to let tech support subtly know that I am proficient without showing off?

I manage a couple of small websites for friends and family as their admin, ranging from installing wordpress to full-stack web development. In this position I often have to contact the support of hosting companies or domain providers because some debugging requires information from their side or ...

awkward-situations online-interaction written-interaction

Tinkeringbell

09:18

Anyone here that can safely follow links? This feels spammy : interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/10235/1599

A J

no it is just a pdf

Tinkeringbell

Okay, then it's a bad answer... ;)

A J

exactly

@Tinkeringbell This question came to mind after the discussion with Jaydeep Khare. What did you study to get this programmer job?

Tinkeringbell

@AJ A special program, set up for people with a BA/MA degree but no job. 6 months fulltime school (40 hours a week), then half a year of 1 day school, 4 days work.

It was called 'Make IT Work' ;)

but the only sites I can find are in Dutch

A J

09:33

@Tinkeringbell Oh.

@Tinkeringbell Yeah. Make "Tinkeringbell" Work. :P

It seems like a nice program.

Tinkeringbell

I enjoyed it, it also was sort of a life saver. Without it, I might still be stuck in retail

A J

I have heard about it before I think. I just can't recall.

@Tinkeringbell Ahh.

JAD

Sounds like a traineeship

they're all over the place these days

A J

I could've ended up in digital marketing if I hadn't asked a fellow in neighborhood to give me a developer's tasks.

Tinkeringbell

@JAD Sort-of, but this is a program from the government, a school, and companies together.

A J

09:39

*some

A J

09:50

@Tinkeringbell no problem

Tinkeringbell

@AJ That's a nice switch too :)

Hi @HenryWHHackv2.1.1! How are you?

Henry WH Hack v2.1.1

Down with a stuffy noise.

Nothing major. (I hope.)

Tinkeringbell

@HenryWHHackv2.1.1 I hope it gets better soon :) stuffy noses are horrible..

Yvette Colomb

10:18

you guys want this question?

0

Q: How do I discourage my brother from getting a dog?

My family's border collie passed away a few months ago and my brother (aged 36, lives with his wife and 6 year old son) wants a new dog. There are 2 problems that my mum and I have raised: Nobody in the family has the time to look after a dog. We all work full time. Beforehand my mum would loo...

dogs

JAD

might be on topic, although some clarification would be needed

A J

@YvetteColomb can work and what JAD said.

R/A or simple not an answer?

JAD

my first question is, how is problem 1 relevant if he has his own household? Does the family live really closeby? How does the brother having a dog (emotionally) affect the rest of the family that much?

@AJ technically it's an answer. Downvote as you please though

14 hours ago, by Catija

As shitty as it is, we can not delete content just because we disagree with it.

Tinkeringbell

@JAD I'm going to raise a mod flag... I remember that name and that's not good

JAD

@Tinkeringbell yep

Tinkeringbell

10:29

@YvetteColomb Hmmm... I don't really see a good IPS question in there...

A J

Well if he doesn't cheat then she either wants him to cheat or she wants him to submit to her dominance. If he does cheat, then he is cheating and wants to cheat. Either way, the best solution to all problems is to cheat. Or submit like a bitch and be her slave forever. — safebookverified 41 secs ago

b word!

Yvette Colomb

thanks

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir that would be a nice regex for the comment bot ;) offensive comments ;)

Mithrandir

there is, but it didn't have that word

yesterday, by IPS Comment Bot

Matched regex(es) ["offensive"]

Curious... will this onebox?

8

Q: How does Láadan aim to express the views of women more than natural Western languages?

Láadan was created, according to Wikipedia, to try an experiment in seeing if a constructed language designed specifically for women could better express the views of women better than natural Western languages: Láadan is a feminist constructed language created by Suzette Haden Elgin in 1982 ...

laadan

Apparently it does, cool

JAD

@Mithrandir :O! Leak!

Mithrandir

10:45

Conlangs are interesting ;)

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir Maybe, but I don't know any ;)

Mithrandir

I don't actually know any either.

I know enough to ask questions about them though :P

JAD

You don't have to know things about things to ask things about things

Mithrandir

Also I can just browse Wikipedia until I found a question

Tinkeringbell

@JAD Yeah, but then I at least have to know things to ask about :)

@Mithrandir That's a distraction ;)

Mithrandir

10:47

I like browsing Wikipedia.

Tinkeringbell

I have so much I still have to read! Including the SmokeDetector stuff..

There's like a lot of meta.se that I don't know yet either

And I can't help myself, I just keep ordering books

JAD

speaking of MetaSE

if you downvote without having sufficient rep, you get a popup telling you that the vote has been recorded, but not displayed

Tinkeringbell

@JAD True

JAD

What is the effect of recording the invisible downvotes?

Mithrandir

internal data crunching

JAD

10:51

@Mithrandir to what end?

Mithrandir

shrugs They show up in data.SE AFAIK

JAD

curious

Mithrandir

11:03

And no one dared... disturb the sound of silence....

A J

SILENCE!!

:P

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir I'm actually reading stuff!

A J

@Tinkeringbell watcha readin'? ;)

Tinkeringbell

@AJ The news :) and if there's still lunch break time after that, I'll start the smokedetector manual..

And if there's even more time, I'm going to find out how to help that comment bot with it's regex

A J

Oh. The lunch break. Here the time for a tea break.

Tinkeringbell

11:14

@AJ Hahaha :) Enjoy!

Tinkeringbell

11:35

Pfft.. people are going over the top here... translating the word 'cornflakes' even though everyone call em that..

SmokeDetector

[ SmokeDetector | MS ] Potentially bad keyword in body: When is it ok to ask someone not to behave a certain way? by tortillamix on interpersonal.SE (@Tinkeringbell)

Tinkeringbell

@SmokeDetector Edited down repost of the one from yesterday

Extroverted Main Man

1

Q: When is it ok to ask someone not to behave a certain way?

There is someone I know who is really into kink/bdsm/fetish. He is one of the several organizers at social dances I attend. Note, these dances have nothing to do with kink/bdsm/fetish or anything sex related. This person often acts in a way that makes me feel uncomfortable, loudly talking openly ...

sex young-adults

A J

@RoryAlsop How is your flu?

better?

Tinkeringbell

11:51

Has anyone seen @Magish lately? they seem to have disappeared into thin air?

Mithrandir

they do that sometimes

Tinkeringbell

@ExtrovertedMainMan I left two comments there that could use some upvotes, and the question needs to be closed asap

Also, I don't get where the three upvotes come from... :/

IPS Comment Bot

12:17

By giving her a doorstop you are implying that she's incapable of finding a solution herself. I think she's more than annoyed. But I'm sure she understands and she may be willing to coorporate, but perhaps you should say sorry first to clear the tension so you can start over again. — Ruard van Elburg 32 secs ago

#10151 Ruard van Elburg (101 rep) | Q: How to communicate with neighbour with banging door without making her uncomfortable (score: 5) | posted 36 hours ago by simon_smiley (126 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["you\\W(really)?(need\\Wto|should)"]

IPS Comment Bot

12:35

Do you have any relationship with him or is he just an important guy at those dances you barely know and/or talk to personally? I still think the question what other people think/how involved they are plays an important role. I think you should edit your question to include such information so people don't have to read through 300 comments. — Raditz_35 1 min ago

#10248 Raditz_35 (179 rep) | Q: How to ask someone to stop behaving in a certain way in public that makes me uncomfortable (score: 2) | posted 58 minutes ago by tortillamix (19 rep) | edited 25 minutes ago by tortillamix (19 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["you\\W(really)?(need\\Wto|should)"]

Do you have any relationship with him or is he just an important guy at those dances you barely know and/or talk to? I still think the question what other people think/how involved they are plays an important role. It plays an important role anyways, but I know of people attending events without knowing that it was specifically for people with a certain "background" in another liberal city for example. How regular are those "dances"? I think you should edit your question to include such information so people don't have to read through 300 comments — Raditz_35 31 secs ago

#10248 Raditz_35 (179 rep) | Q: How to ask someone to stop behaving in a certain way in public that makes me uncomfortable (score: 2) | posted 1 hours ago by tortillamix (19 rep) | edited 30 minutes ago by tortillamix (19 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["you\\W(really)?(need\\Wto|should)"]

Extroverted Main Man

12:59

0

Q: Macro for replacing cell value if the condition of the other cell fulfill

I am having column A with B in all the cells. in column B I am having different values. In column B value repeats in all cells. When the value changes in column B I need the value of the corresponding first row of the column A should replace as AB Example:- ID State AB CAL B CAL B CAL AB ...

family

Mithrandir

@ExtrovertedMainMan wat

JAD

I don't think the staple answer of "just talk to them" works here

Gorakh Yadav

@aj

A J

13:17

@GorakhYadav Hello!

How are you? Long time no see.

Mithrandir

14:06

...If I've managed to get through an hour and a half of a ten-hour loop of "Where There's a Whip, There's a Way", what does that say about me?

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir That you're probably crazy? :P

Does anyone know a site for 'identify-this-craft-book'?

Mithrandir

What do you mean by craft book?

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir A book on a craft? :P With tutorials and patterns

Mithrandir

Sounds like an amalgamation of Literature and Arts & Crafts :P

Tinkeringbell

I remember loaning that book from someone, but I don't remember what it's called and google isn't being helpful ;)

And since I didn't get it in a library, I can't search a database..

Mithrandir

14:09

...I'm almost tempted to tell you to ask at Literature.SE just to see what would happen.

JAD

@Tinkeringbell ask them?

Tinkeringbell

@JAD I'm no longer in contact with that person ;)

JAD

Are tutorial books considered Literature?

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir Well, that has been playing in my mind as well... :P

But I thought that would be pushing boundaries, and I don't do that

TheTinyMan

@Tinkeringbell You? Never!

Mithrandir

14:10

@JAD According to some probably and according to others probably not.

Tinkeringbell

@TheTinyMan Oh, look who's awake! :P

TheTinyMan

@Tinkeringbell Morning! :-D

Mithrandir

'fternoon

Tinkeringbell

@TheTinyMan I was just about to say I usually get a warning first! :P

TheTinyMan

@Tinkeringbell Nope, today you get teased immediately! :-D

Tinkeringbell

14:13

@Mithrandir Hmmm.. I think I'll look up a related facebook group that allows pattern requests.. :/

Or shake up the Literature.SE meta ;)

Em C

@Tinkeringbell how much info do you have on the book? I don't know if it would be allowed on A&C, resource requests are off topic but identification q's are ok

we even had one question on "what brand of paint is this in my photo" crafts.stackexchange.com/questions/2649/… .. which consensus seems to be would have been ok, if the picture wasn't so bad :P

Tinkeringbell

I know it was a book on tatting, that it's format was something like lessons, going from simple things to more complicated things... that it included patters for things to try, and that the thing I made was a little cute hat. I also remember that that hat was probably in the book as a basket, with the recommendation that you could leave off the handle to make the little hat.

It was mostly black and white, with I believe some color pictures and a pretty old-fashioned font...

I feel like pattern requests are off-topic on A&C though ;) And I'm only looking for the book because I want the pattern?

Em C

ah, yeah I think they are

tatting is neat!

Tinkeringbell

@EmC Surprised you know that :) Not many people know what I'm talking about when I mention it, or think I'm talking about tattoos :P

Do you tat as well? Have you made anything really big?

Em C

@Tinkeringbell I only recently learned about it, haven't tried it :)

Tinkeringbell

14:26

@EmC Do it! It's fun and it makes some really pretty stuff..

Em C

I think it was a random youtube recommendation after I watched some videos on spinning

Tinkeringbell

I usually tat little shoes to attach to baby-congratulations cards ;)

Em C

@Tinkeringbell sure :D right after I clear out my ravelry queue haha

Tinkeringbell

@EmC So do you spin? :P

Em C

aww, that sounds very cute

Tinkeringbell

14:27

@EmC what queue are you talking about? :P

I think I'll be focusing on cro-tat (crochet with tatting combined) when I've finished the current WIP :)

Em C

@Tinkeringbell I've tried hand spinning some, I'm not very good but it's fun

Tinkeringbell

@EmC I still need to try that one ;) It would be cool to make my own yarn

Em C

@Tinkeringbell do you know lion brand homespun yarn? I took that apart and used it as roving to practice haha

the tricky part I think is keeping everything consistent so using that helped to focus just on the spinning technique

hmm let me see if I can find the rav link

Tinkeringbell

@EmC I've seen that brand on some international groups before... I know it by name, there's no stores nearby that stock it though ;)

Em C

@Tinkeringbell ah, maybe it's a US thing. I keep getting gifted it but it kind of sucks.. it's basically just roving with a couple strings wrapped around it

Tinkeringbell

14:35

@EmC That sounds like it's not a nice yarn to work with, except if you're making bulky stuff?

We have some cheap brands here too, they're mostly acrylic and itchy, they split easily and are a pain in the ass when you have to undo your stitches :/

I always go for the more expensive cotton... My skin doesn't tolerate wool or acrylic yarn very well anyways..

Em C

hopefully this link works

@Tinkeringbell yeah, exactly

Sid

Someone answer this question, which is definitely not for IPS- "How to be a good liar?"

Em C

I only recently started buying "fancy" yarns but now I am hooked (no pun intended :P)

Tinkeringbell

@EmC Yeah, I have a ravelry account too, so I can see it. I've been told people without one can't ;)

Em C

@Sid be confident. and either have a little bit of truth, or make it super outlandish.. I've heard conflicting advice on that part ;)

Tinkeringbell

14:39

@EmC Hah, once you're used to the nice stuff it's difficult to go back.. ;)

@Sid Practice on your mom. If she buys it, everyone will ;)

Mine can apparently still see it in my eyes when I try to lie

Sid

@Tinkeringbell Hehehe. That would work if I lived with my mom, which I don't

Tinkeringbell

@EmC Mind if I stalk the profile a little? :P

Em C

@Tinkeringbell go ahead ;) feel free to shame me over not starting that second mitt yet haha

Tinkeringbell

@EmC Hahaha ;)

25 queued? You have a problem! :P

Em C

@Tinkeringbell ... well you see, a couple years ago I decided I couldn't buy yarn unless I had a project for it ...

Tinkeringbell

14:43

@EmC Hmmm.... that explains the amount of stash :P

I still need to fill mine out a bit more, I made the account in 2014 or so, but only recently started using it to keep track of my blanket :)

Em C

@Tinkeringbell yeahhh I blame the requirements for free shipping :P

Tinkeringbell

@EmC Hahaha, I think I'll top you once I've uploaded my stash ;)

Em C

last year was "I can't buy yarn until I finish projects... except this one because it's on sale and I totally know what I want to make with it"

@Tinkeringbell admitting you have a problem is the first step :P

Tinkeringbell

@EmC So, go finish that mitt :P you've passed the one year mark on that one!

Em C

@Tinkeringbell I know!! I was finishing up Christmas projects before that but I really have no excuse now

Tinkeringbell

14:45

@EmC Yeah well... I make lot's of amigurumi's, they require all sorts of colors!

Em C

@Tinkeringbell totally valid :)

Tinkeringbell

@EmC I just added you as a friend. Does that mean you'll get a link to my profile too? Or am I just bookmarking random persons so I can stalk the page a lot more later? :P

(I need to go soon, have to catch a bus)

It's cool to see you're bistitchual! :)

Em C

@Tinkeringbell I got a notification :D

Anne Daunted

1

Q: How to ask someone to stop behaving in a certain way in public that makes me uncomfortable

There is someone I know who is really into kink/bdsm/fetish. He is one of the several organizers at social dances I attend. Note, these dances have nothing to do with kink/bdsm/fetish or anything sex related. This person often acts in a way that makes me feel uncomfortable, loudly talking openly ...

boundaries sex

Finally put on hold

I saw it earlier, but didn't know what to do

Em C

@AnneDaunted ah, I saw the preview and was afraid to click on that at work :s

Anne Daunted

14:50

;-)

When I saw it, the OP had already edited the question and so it was more of an IPS question

But it's annoying when questions get closed and, instead of editing them, people just post a new (although updated) one

Tinkeringbell

@AnneDaunted When in doubt, put the concerns into a mod flag... ;)

@AnneDaunted The other one got deleted though before this was re-posted...

Anne Daunted

@Tinkeringbell They deleted it themself

Modflag is a good idea

Tinkeringbell

@AnneDaunted Ahhh... then we have a case for that thing discussed recently on meta!

Mod flag with a link to that :)

Anne Daunted

-4

Q: Is it ok to delete a question, revise it, and then repost?

What happens if I edit a question so that more than half its content is gone, then decide to delete the original question and post the new, shorter question? Is that bad to do? Why? For reference, here's a question I asked and the revised version of the question, which was deleted (both are cu...

discussion deleted-questions

Tinkeringbell

Especially if it's self-deletion (I didn't have a link to the previous one, and since I started casting delete vote (sorry bout that), I assumed 2 others had chimed in)

@AnneDaunted Yep, that one!

Anne Daunted

14:56

Catija linked to the deleted one in a comment on the new question

Tinkeringbell

@AnneDaunted Just noticed that. No need to flag that then ;) She's already on it :)

Anne Daunted

I still wonder if I should've cast the last necessary close vote

Tinkeringbell

@AnneDaunted Meh...

Anne Daunted

ok

Tinkeringbell

Actually, I was ashamed I didn't keep track and hadn't removed my close-vote when it was edited to no longer be a should I

On the other hand, after that it was still too broad, no info on how the other dancers reacted/are bothered and also I don't think the example matches 'talking kink'.

but @TheTinyMan seems to be the resident expert on that :P

Anne Daunted

14:59

indeed :-)

TheTinyMan

@Tinkeringbell Heh, I don't think that I'm the only one here. That...is likely to be a snippet from a conversation about kink but might not be.

apaul

It seems my hatchet job wasn't appreciated.

TheTinyMan

@apaul They find the pieces of the body?

IPS Comment Bot

@JMac I don't want her to be talking about my love life, if she doesn't want me to talk about it in return. That's the premise of my question. As it stands, I've been letting her make small comments without knowing how to respond, as I didn't want to start fights or ignore her request to "not know", but I'm tired of that double standard. — Jess K. 1 min ago

#10182 Jess K. (7862 rep) | Q: Responding to my mom's remarks about my love life when she refuses to accept/acknowledge it (score: 30) | posted 22 hours ago by Jess K. (7862 rep) | edited 22 hours ago by Jess K. (7862 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic"]

apaul

5

A: Responding to my mom's remarks about my love life when she refuses to accept/acknowledge it

The Answer It's actually fairly simple - that is, not complicated; it might not be easy to bring yourself to hold up to it though. You just keep pointing out that you are not allowed to talk about that. Mom: You should... (or "Why don't you..." or "You need..." or whatever) You: I do...

Em C

15:07

@IPSCommentBot heh, perhaps this should be upgraded to not trigger for OP's comment on their own question

Anne Daunted

I do agree with your edit, @apaul

@EmC I'm not referring to this case, but I've seen enough cases where OP's wrote delete-worthy comments

Just flagged a bunch today already

apaul

@AnneDaunted I thought it was a major improvement, but it's still a weak answer.

Anne Daunted

With the question being popular enough, everything gets upvotes

apaul

@AnneDaunted True.

JAD

answers are for answers, not your own personal soapbox

Anne Daunted

15:14

It's not like there was a shortage of sites on the Internet where everyone can post their personal opinion on everything they want

0

Q: How do I recognize false praises?

Background: I am part of a club in my university which deals primarily in public speaking, debating, etc. It's been close to 6 months since I joined and to be fair, I haven't done quite well in debating tournaments. Since, it is Asian Parliamentary Debate, much of the results depend on your teamm...

conversations

is this answerable?

apaul

I hope he posts a meta question if/when he decides to roll back the edit. Seems like a case that could be used for reference later on.

Anne Daunted

@apaul If he does roll back the edit, but doesn't post a meta question, you could post one yourself

sphennings

@AnneDaunted Ish. The answer is you can't/it's entirely situational.

apaul

@AnneDaunted Probably will, but I don't have the best track record on this site's meta.

@AnneDaunted Looks fairly opinion based, at least the first question.

Anne Daunted

@sphennings Maybe the OP is hoping for subtle cues (e. g. body language) to tell truth from lie

Paul Ekman

Paul Ekman (born February 15, 1934) is an American psychologist and professor emeritus at the University of California, San Francisco who is a pioneer in the study of emotions and their relation to facial expressions. He has created an "atlas of emotions" with more than ten thousand facial expressions, and has gained a reputation as "the best human lie detector in the world". He was ranked 59th out of the 100 most cited psychologists of the twentieth century. Ekman conducted seminal research on the specific biological correlations of specific emotions, demonstrating the universality and discreteness...

Tinkeringbell

15:22

@AnneDaunted that would be an interesting research question @Sid

Extroverted Main Man

1

Q: How do I recognize false praises?

Background: I am part of a club in my university which deals primarily in public speaking, debating, etc. It's been close to 6 months since I joined and to be fair, I haven't done quite well in debating tournaments. Since, it is Asian Parliamentary Debate, much of the results depend on your teamm...

conversations

2

Q: How do I express affection and appreciation for a dear friend with low self esteem?

A very dear friend of mine has low self esteem, particularly relating to social desirability and men, and becomes very sad when I've expressed my deep appreciation for her. Compliments just make her feel that it couldn't possibly be true and she's even cried when I've told her that I love her and...

united-states friends self-esteem

Tinkeringbell

The question will need some buzzwords like non verbal communication then ;)

A J

@Tinkeringbell which one?

IPS Comment Bot

Does she respond that way to praise from everyone, or is it just you? — apaul 55 secs ago

#10264 apaul (27267 rep) | Q: How do I express affection and appreciation for a dear friend with low self esteem? (score: 2) | posted 13 minutes ago by William Grobman (111 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic"]

apaul

@IPSCommentBot The hell? How does that match aic?

Anne Daunted

15:34

11

Q: Why do men rise when a woman leaves the room?

I once read that in Canada, it is considered polite for men to rise when a woman leaves a room and men normally offer their hands to women. My question is, what is the origin of this tradition?

etiquette canada

Mithrandir

...I should probably kill that one

Anne Daunted

does the edit invalidate Kate's answer?

Tinkeringbell

@AnneDaunted Maybe, but we do allow the editing of 'bad' questions to get them reopened I think?

I think this needs a 'the question has been updated, please review your answer'?

Anne Daunted

@Tinkeringbell But the question is pretty old. i wonder if it's not better to start all over again

Tinkeringbell

@AJ the false praises one... main man with his interruptions!

Anne Daunted

15:46

@Tinkeringbell And what would the update look like - deleted by owner?

Tinkeringbell

@AnneDaunted Feel free to leave a comment ;)

@AnneDaunted Are we talking about the same question? the man rising ?

Anne Daunted

@Tinkeringbell Yes

"My question is, what is the origin of this tradition?"

formerly "My question is, why is this tradition considered to be polite and what is its origin?"

Tinkeringbell

@AnneDaunted I'd leave a comment saying 'heads up, the question has been edited and part of the original question was removed (why it was considered polite. You might want to review your answer to see if it still stands, to avoid receiving downvotes'

Anne Daunted

Then again, it hasn't been reopened yet

and it won't get my vote

Tinkeringbell

@AnneDaunted then you could comment why :)

that way, people can take it into consideration when seeing it in the queue

Em C

15:55

@ExtrovertedMainMan too many questions in one post? I want to answer, but..

Tinkeringbell

@EmC yeah

and im going to make a meta on disclaimers...

Em C

@Tinkeringbell sigh, hits VTC :P

Tinkeringbell

@EmC It could use a comment pointing that out too... I'm on itr

Em C

@Tinkeringbell working on it ;)

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