The Awkward Silence

Yvette Colomb

01:25

morning

Gypsy Spellweaver

Top of to ya.

10 Replies

It is night for me

Gypsy Spellweaver

I don't monitor it here.

10 Replies

I don't have a choice on the matter.

It makes little difference because I'm just as tired either way

Wow! everyone is awake now

A J

Yes

Morning all

Gypsy Spellweaver

01:31

Define "Awake"

10 Replies

Awake in the sense that you are somewhat capable of intelligently responding to stimuli.

Gypsy Spellweaver

Duh! Did I pass?

10 Replies

I think.

Gypsy Spellweaver

... Therfore, I am.

10 Replies

As long as this isn't a dream, you probably passed

Gypsy Spellweaver

01:34

Can't be a dream. Someone said "morning," which is the end of a dream.

10 Replies

That logic would make sense.

In a dream...

Gypsy Spellweaver

Uhoh

10 Replies

yeah :/

Today I discovered how messed up javascript is.

I was writing some code to create an object, and I didn't realize I hadn't put in the right ammount of parenthesis, but, it didn't give me an error (because its javascript) And it took me fie hours of debugging and almost giving up to rewrite the entire project to get it to work. and then I deleted the extra paren and it worked flawlessly.

A J

@GypsySpellweaver Missing e tells us that you are not awake. :P

10 Replies

Me not noticing it also might signify something as well, lol

A J

01:42

Haha

Gypsy Spellweaver

Zzzzz

10 Replies

01:56

I'm hungry

Nothing is open this late though :/

I'll have to eat cereal

HDE 226868

03:20

@Catija This one.

I deleted the comment because I felt I could be speaking from annoyance, rather than an objective look at the answer. I'm a (somewhat) high-rep user on the site and a potential pro-tem mod somewhere down the line. It reflects poorly if my comments are snarkier than need be.

@Hamlet Just to give you a final update on the volunteer issue: Today was the last day of camp, and once again, he managed to take some cues the second time around after seeing me do things, or after I mentioned something briefly. I'm quite happy and surprised with the results.

I might write up a self answer if I can determine what exactly worked.

Hamlet

@HDE226868 was that because of the advice in my answer?

@HDE226868 yeah, that's one of the two things that make writing answers on this site very difficult.

HDE 226868

@Hamlet Sort of. I think it was indirect inspiration - if you undelete it, I can check for sure.

Hamlet

The other thing is it's really hard to avoid making guesses about the situations in answers, because there's almost always things you don't know about the specific situation.

HDE 226868

Yes. It's also possible that other interactions he had with the camp he worked in the morning influenced things. I've talked to some of the folks who were with him then, and they haven't come up with anything conclusive, but nobody was observing, per se.

Also, I can't really see into his head - which is the only way I could definitively tell what changed.

HNQ #2, by the way.

Gypsy Spellweaver

03:47

@HDE226868 Glad it was a good experience with the volunteer.

Yvette Colomb

we have a new candidate for moderator

1

A: Accepting Nominations — Who should moderate this site?

Notes: I believe I would be a good choice because I've been around the network for a good few years and I think I have a fair and balanced idea of, not only how moderation works, but also how the Stack Exchange model works. I started out on Stack Overflow four and a half years ago, and Sta...

Another good choice. We have a nice line up of candidates. This site is going well me thinks

I'm not sure that we really have a consensus on our scope yet. Thoughts?

Gypsy Spellweaver

@YvetteColomb Scope is a Work In Progress thing.

Yvette Colomb

yes indeed and scope changes over time - look at SO and cogsci is now reevaluating

Gypsy Spellweaver

How about Software Engineering for scope change?

Yvette Colomb

04:03

I'm not active on there - has it changed a lot?

Gypsy Spellweaver

Seriously, I think one issue, of a few, that still needs work is how to accommodate the global scope of the site and the local scope of the Q&A. We could end up with a goggle of locale/culture/sub-culture tags and still "leave someone out"

By rules, with force of law, posts must be in English (of one variant or another), yet the issues faced by users will be anything but comprehensible to the typical Native English Speaker.

Yvette Colomb

I think my brain just bled trying to read that lolol

Zizouz212

Hey folks

@GypsySpellweaver What happened to that?

Gypsy Spellweaver

I didn't live through it, but scuttlebutt is that it started as one thing, got all scrambled up, and took forever to clean up.

Zizouz212

@GypsySpellweaver It's a goal of achieving a balance. The issue is that we need to be aware of the implicit factors that can drive things away, and the natural acts that people will do that could do the same. If I were to ask about culture A, but everyone votes up and answer for culture B (that is totally wrong for A), we do the asker a disservice, anyone who finds the question a disservice, we promote misinformation, and when people see that, they won't ask because they can already...

assume the answer (that is wrong)

@GypsySpellweaver I just remembered that it was "call in the mods from other sites" and then silence. No clue what actually happened there in the end

I feel like I'm too overly invested in this site for the wrong reasons...

Gypsy Spellweaver

04:13

Here's a good way too look at a possible philosophy for the site.

> In seeking to be inclusive, we do not wish to open ourselves to the destruction of our group by those on self-serving power trips, or to philosophies and practices contradictory to our principles. In seeking to exclude those whose ways are contradictory to ours, we do not want to deny participation with us to any who are sincerely interested in our knowledge, regardless of race, color, sex, age, national or cultural origins or sexual preference.

Zizouz212

I actually love that wording

You just perfectly described cultural relativism actually.

Gypsy Spellweaver

Slightly modified >_>

Zizouz212

(well, kind of, but whatever)

Gypsy Spellweaver

Anthropology is an interesting discipline, if one can acquire the balance of distance and immersion needed.

Zizouz212

Yaay! I'm kind of studying that!

Well... I'm doing Global Development Policy, but development is so many things :)

Shaadi hai delhi ke ladoo...

Gypsy Spellweaver

04:17

Here's an interesting read. ohio.edu/people/thompsoc/Body.html

Zizouz212

@GypsySpellweaver I'll have a look :)

Gypsy Spellweaver

Enjoy, and report :)

Zizouz212

I might not fully read it right now though. It's 12:20am

Gypsy Spellweaver

It is a bit of a read. Best to do with an engaged mind anyway.

Zizouz212

04:36

sigh I'm tired, but I'm too lazy to go to sleep

Gypsy Spellweaver

yo comprendé

A J

What can be done here to keep this question opened? Any ideas:

3

Q: How should a person be told to apologise when he thinks he isn't wrong?

A few days ago, in a Zoology class, one of my classmates was caught reading the Zoology textbook when the teacher was explaining. Although he wasn't reading anything that he wasn't supposed to, the teacher got mad at him for not paying attention, and asked him to leave the class. He openly declin...

@YvetteColomb It's strange that the vote count for your nomination went up when you withdrew the nomination.

Gypsy Spellweaver

I don't think it needs anything except an explicit statement of locale.

A J

@Catija Believe me, I know. His profile says India and that's a Hindu name. But we can wait for OP to confirm. — A J 13 hours ago

Yvette Colomb

@AJ It's one of two things - either people are happy I've withdrawn, or they don't realise I declined, they just saw the user and voted

Gypsy Spellweaver

04:39

It describes the situation well, and anyone in the same locale would know the rules and could answer it.

A J

@GypsySpellweaver Maybe I can.

Zizouz212

Personally, I think it's a good question

A J

I need to see what can I offer.

@Zizouz212 agreed.

Zizouz212

Out of curiosity, are you from India?

Gypsy Spellweaver

The profile says where he is. Just the question doesn't

A J

04:40

@Zizouz212 yep

Zizouz212

Yaay! I am too :)

Gypsy Spellweaver

Excellent

A J

@Zizouz212 But, you are in Canada, aren't you?

Gypsy Spellweaver

I suspect that the answer, locally correct, is that he's out of luck

Zizouz212

Yep. But originally from India

I wish I spoke the language though... :(

A J

04:42

@GypsySpellweaver yep, it's now late to apologize.

@Zizouz212 You can't?

Gypsy Spellweaver

Young blood with heavy Western exposure via the internet VS. The Old Guard

Zizouz212

I used to be able to speak Kutchi when I was very young (I lived with my grandparents)

But out here, there aren't that many people to speak with so I've completely lost it.

A J

ohh

Zizouz212

Yeah :(

My best friend is from Pakistan and their family (who I am really close with) is trying to each me Urdu though :)

A J

I can't speak Urdu. I know a few words, but I can't really.

Zizouz212

04:44

Super similar to Kutchi, but for some reason, it's super difficult to re-learn

Do you speak any language?

A J

@Zizouz212 I speak Hindi, which is my mother-tongue, English, and a bit Punjabi and Telugu.

@Zizouz212 Can you speak Gujarati?

Zizouz212

It's similar to Gujarati, but there are many differences

A J

ok

Zizouz212

So when I learned Kutchi, I basically also learned Gujarati. Although my grandparents spoke in like a Gujarati/Kutchi mix :P

But that was when I was super young.

A J

@Zizouz212 It's like my grandparents speaking Hindi/Rajasthani mix.

Zizouz212

04:47

:)

But really, all these languages are connected in some way or another

A J

yep

Gypsy Spellweaver

As an outsider looking in I hope to read a valid answer to that question and gain enlightenment therefrom.

Zizouz212

I'm really happy that I'm in Toronto, because you literally get to see everyone represented here. I feel like if I lived somewhere else, I wouldn't have held to my identity

A J

There is a slight difference in the language of the neighbor state.

@GypsySpellweaver I might post one.

Zizouz212

@AJ Please do - I myself was kind of disappointed with the answers there

Gypsy Spellweaver

04:52

Though, with what little I know, I do find it difficult to imagine that missing the final day of lecture should cause an entire class to fail the final exam.

Zizouz212

Your friend sounds like a reasonable person, even in the face of an authority figure acting completely ridiculously and inappropriately. Good for him for standing up for what is right. — Kik 13 hours ago

Gypsy Spellweaver

@Zizouz212 I was disappointed by people trying to answer the question who should have known that they were actually clueless about the cultural conditions.

Zizouz212

Hehe... Talk about culturally relative

@GypsySpellweaver I'm looking at the profiles of all the answerers - Delaware, Canada... US and Canada basically

And that comment was the perfect example

Post-secondary culture here is very different than elsewhere

Gypsy Spellweaver

BTW, that's another argument I have against local/cultural tags. So few people will look at the tags. They might read the question, however, and that's where critical information should be.

Zizouz212

I have a friend who's doing electrical engineering at uwaterloo, and he was just like "Oh, you can just walk out of a lecture whenever you want. The profs don't care"

And for me (my family, and culture holds education very strong), that was really surprising

Greetings @John :)

Gypsy Spellweaver

04:57

My suspicion is that in that place the prof was correct and that "Jon" was trying to be a "Westerner"

John

@Zizouz212 Hello to you.

Zizouz212

@GypsySpellweaver I'd tend to agree with you.

Gypsy Spellweaver

One thing that's not in the question, and might make a difference is whether or not the prof began the term with some "rules" that included something like "when I'm lecturing, listening is all you should be doing." Of course that would only reinforce the prof's position, and isn't required if the culture expects that anyway.

Zizouz212

Many universities I think have that as a policy

I've actually wanted to do an exchange to an Indian university (or Pakistan/Bangladesh) when I'm older, and do courses/internship/project or something. I remember reading things like that on many websites

If I had the tools, I'm thinking of trying to get some data on how we're dealing with questions actually. I'm debating whether I should propose some "How do I write my question" guide on meta

omg it's 1:05 am

Greetings young @Passerby

Gypsy Spellweaver

I have been in college classes where a similar rule was in effect. I would have been disappointed to see the prof take it to that level, for sure. Yet, by the rules agreed to at the beginning of class, the prof would be "in the right" to require the offending student to leave. And, like as not, security would have removed him.

Passerby

05:06

@Zizouz212 you must be shocked that you don't have to raise your hand to ask for permission to go to the bathroom either. You are an adult and the ridiculous power trips of lower education no longer apply. Why should anyone but you care if you pay attention or show up in class?

As long as you don't disrupt the class, no one should care.

Zizouz212

Are you talking in reference to the question or my surprise?

Passerby

Your suprise.

Gypsy Spellweaver

Again, cultural relativism.

Zizouz212

Oh okay :)

@Passerby One thing that I've found is that many "western" cultures are incredibly individualistic, whereas other societies, especially in developing countries, are very communalistic. There will be a clash there for sure

Passerby

I already pointed out the ridiculous of the teachers reaction in my comment there. But I'm guessing that is a lower education situation instead of a higher learning one.

Zizouz212

05:10

The thing is that disrupting a teacher would be unthinkable. Even if it may only be you who is "distracted", it distracts others - other students, teachers.

It's a very different point of view from what many of us are used to

A J

@Passerby Yes, the teacher overreacted, but it is the fault of both parties. Since teacher won't apologize here, therefore student needs to make one to make things right.

Zizouz212

Aah lovely.

14 of the top 15 users on the site are either from the US, UK, Canada or Australia

A J

@Zizouz212 and the remaining one?

Zizouz212

Kerala :)

A J

ohh Sagar

Zizouz212

05:18

Yep

Not surprised by that actually, but somewhat interested in what long-term consequences that may have for the site

A J

I'd really love to know the reason where I went wrong in this answer.

Zizouz212

@AJ Not sure

Oh snaps, we've got twenty answers on this question? interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/663/…

A J

yep

effect of HNQ.

There are two questions from IPS in HNQ right now.

Zizouz212

I keep forgetting we're public :P

A J

lol

Zizouz212

05:28

And we're getting tons of answers in the comments. Fun stuff

A J

yep

Gypsy Spellweaver

@AJ First, why do you think you "went wrong" on that answer?

A J

@GypsySpellweaver because of a downvote

Gypsy Spellweaver

Downvotes don't mean anything, really.

Someone just didn't like what you said, or how you said it, or the spelling of your words, or, or, ...

Could it be better? Sure. Could it be worse? Yes.

You could have written a nice long PhD level dissertation on email etiquette and still gotten downvotes.

A J

yeah, there will always be one or more who will hate you

Gypsy Spellweaver

05:36

That's just it. It is not personal. Don't make it personal.

It's not about you, and may not even be about the answer.

Zizouz212

For all you know, it could've been someone with another answer there that down voted

It actually happens all the time

A J

I am not taking it personal. In fact, my posts on Movies and TV SE got at least one downvote while the rest of the community upvoted them. That's why I no longer care about it.

Gypsy Spellweaver

There's only one vote that counts. The OP's

Zizouz212

It's actually really fun watching someones rep go down one point as they down vote your answer :P

Gypsy Spellweaver

If the OP accepts your answer, then you know you have helped someone.

A J

05:40

@GypsySpellweaver agreed

@Zizouz212 lol

@GypsySpellweaver true

Zizouz212

@AJ Happens super often on Stack Overflow actually

A J

@Zizouz212 It doesn't on M&TV anyway.

Zizouz212

I could probably go an entire day writing answers on SO waiting for that to happen :P

@AJ That's good :)

It's 1:45 and I really need sleep. I'll see you in another dimension!

Gypsy Spellweaver

Just to show how fickle votes can be, I've had an answer with negative score accepted by the OP. Next time I go back to the site it's at +5.

A J

@Zizouz212 lol. see ya

Zizouz212

05:44

Farewell! Till we meet again! :P

A J

07:17

0

A: Let's design a community promotion ad!

We can go for something like this. The background includes people communicating directly and online. It has a nice quote. Though, this quote can be changed.

breaking the silence

HDE 226868

11:44

@GypsySpellweaver Yeah, I was happy with how it turned out.

@YvetteColomb That's excellent.

@AJ I don't think it's a bad (of off-topic) question at all. It would be nice if the country tag was added; I'm curious as to how the answers would change. I don't know much about the Indian school system.

A J

12:02

@HDE226868 That's why I provided an answer keeping that in mind.

1

A: How should a person be told to apologise when he thinks he isn't wrong?

Though, there is no explicit mention of where it happened, but based on your profile, I can safely assume where it did. Since I belong to the same country you do, I can offer some advice about it. In our country, teachers particularly take pride in their job and why won't they. Teachers/Gurus ar...

HDE 226868

@AJ I was just reading it.

A J

k

HDE 226868

"Teachers/Gurus are given a higher place than the God in our culture." is interesting, and makes the teacher's position a bit more reasonable.

A J

yep

Your question will be the first one to cross 10K views.

HDE 226868

Probably. I'm not it's an excellent question (certainly not my best). I was surprised at the number of answers (some really similar) for a yes/no question, though.

Quite a lot of comments, though.

A J

12:10

We get them on popular questions.

HDE 226868

Yes. Comment wrangling on Worldbuilding is . . . interesting. I hear things are worse on The Workplace - which seems to be where we're headed.

A J

@HDE226868 I have seen mods on The Workplace moving comments to chat many times.

The comment threads get quite long and mods move them to chat multiple times on a single post.

@HDE226868 That site includes etiquette, communication and many things at and about the workplace, while this one includes etiquette and communication in all conditions, if I am not wrong.

So, possibly we have a bright future ahead. :)

HDE 226868

12:25

@AJ I'm reasonably certain that's not possible. It's a longstanding feature request, but it's never been implemented.

@AJ Yeah, that's something to be hopeful about. :-)

Yvette Colomb

12:38

@HDE226868 I think so too

10 Replies

14:29

now its morning for real this time

HDE 226868

15:50

It's now almost afternoon here.

A J

And it's night here.

Crafter0800

16:40

Evening here

Yvette Colomb

night all :)

Crafter0800

GOodnigh :)

Zizouz212

17:22

Hey!

HDE 226868

17:34

silently waves

Zizouz212

How do you do today?

HDE 226868

I do.

You?

Crafter0800

@HDE226868 congratulations on the first gold badge of the site :D

Zizouz212

@HDE226868 I do too.

HDE 226868

@Crafter0800 Thanks!

HDE 226868

17:55

I was actually out when it hit the HNQ, so I had no idea what had happened when I came back hours later and saw

yesterday, by HDE 226868

Zizouz212

Oh lol

That must've been fun :P

HDE 226868

I figured that either a question had hit the HNQ or a Stack Exchange site was collapsing or something.

Zizouz212

Hey, does this comment make sense? I fear that I'm getting a little bit too emotional over this site:

Well, teachers hold a fairly high position in society. That's partly because society is more communalistic versus individualistic - which is more common in places like the US. Due to social conditions, and just the way society is, education is viewed a lot more like a privilege, as opposed to some sort of right (again more common in the US). So to disrespect a teacher would be to abuse a privilege, and to disrespect someone with authority makes it worse. Many universities have policies that reflect that (e.g. be on time or don't come, minimum attendance). — Zizouz212 4 mins ago

I'd probably go to write an answer, but it would probably just end up reading like a rant -_-

HDE 226868

18:11

I don't think it's overly emotional, and it does make sense. I'm not sure I know enough about the Indian education system to judge the accuracy of some of the statements in the thread.

Zizouz212

I think some of the answers and comments I've seen there are just really throwing me off

I'm probably just over-invested in the site.

HDE 226868

20:10

Hello, new users (Who don't seem to use chat much, admittedly)!

I was wondering if anyone had some feedback for this meta question, now that we've gone public.

You might also want to read (or skim) this discussion.

Passerby

The right moderators. Which voting currently shows that may be a problem.

Avantgarde

This new SE is a really interesting addition

And an aptly named chatroom haha

AJ Henderson

@HDE226868 pretty sure most new users don't know chat exists

Zizouz212

@Avantgarde echoes fill this room

Avantgarde

:D

HDE 226868

20:24

@AJHenderson Yeah. I'm hoping folks from other sites who already know chat might have an easier time finding it, though.

AJ Henderson

@HDE226868 <<<

Mithrandir24601

@HDE226868 the physicist in me wants backed-up references and not just here-say, like what would be in a lot of other related sites :P

AJ Henderson

I've been debating whether I have the time to help with trying to get it off the ground or not... unfortunately I'm currently leaning towards the not side of the balance... been working on filming a streaming TV series that has taken up far too much of my free time

HDE 226868

@Mithrandir24601 Same here.

Zizouz212

2

Q: Why doesn't this site have a back it up rule?

I'm looking at the answers on this site. I've found that very few of them are supported by any sort of evidence. For example, in the question How to discourage missionaries?, the top voted answer doesn't back any of its claims up: Have a no cold caller sign. While yes it might irritate them, ...

discussion

AJ Henderson

20:31

@Mithrandir24601 the difficult part there is that in something like IPS, it's a softer science, so references might not always be completely viable, but at least an explanation of mechanism should be included and backed to some kind of experience. It's even harder on the arts sites where there are no hard and fast referenceable rules

but you can still "back it up" in the sense that you can make supportable claims that build towards it, for arts sites for example, it might include examples of the type of work or talking about specific projects that used an approach and how it worked

Mithrandir24601

@AJHenderson Exactly - that's the 'but...' part :P

AJ Henderson

I suppose you guys probably have an even harder thing to work out than the arts sites in a sense though because some stuff is hard supportable and other stuff isn't, so you are caught more in the middle

where it's perhaps even more grey

HDE 226868

@Mithrandir24601 Check out this and this.

Avantgarde

Hope you had a relaxing time at home @Mithrandir24601

Mithrandir24601

@AJHenderson Yeah... This seems to happen quite a bit at Worldbuilding. It's nice there though :)

Passerby

20:36

Well, look at workplace

Mithrandir24601

@Avantgarde Yes, I did, thanks :D

Zizouz212

> Don't be afraid of "enforcement," be afraid of the site becoming low quality. When it comes to practical information, usefulness trumps inclusion in many cases. Think of the situation where you come to the site needing help with a problem. Do you want opinions and theoreticals (which you could get from random friends), or do you want practical advice from people who have actually taken on, and solved the problem in question?

Passerby

No evidence whatsoever

Zizouz212

I actually really like the wording there - could we use it here too?

AJ Henderson

@HDE226868 that first one brings up a great point about the difference between theoreticals and practical experience, though with interpersonal skills, millage can vary so widely between personal experiences too...

Passerby

20:37

And that's working great

HDE 226868

@Zizouz212 We probably could.

AJ Henderson

though it's probably still a very solid starting point

HDE 226868

I wrote up an answer to Hamlet's question and eventually deleted it. It suggested, among other things, the following phrasing:

> The best answers on Interpersonal Skills Stack Exchange aren't just opinions or half-baked thoughts. We want answers that are supported by something solid. References, where possible, are a great start. Personal experience is another fantastic route to use. Above all, though, make sure you explain why your solution works, especially in the situation given. Try to logically justify, as thoroughly as possible, each of your steps, in order to prove your point.

AJ Henderson

might need some room to make jumps from hard experience that is close to theoreticals of how the situation differs

HDE 226868

Terribly written, but that's the sentiment I wanted to get across. It sounds almost the intro to a five paragraph persuasive essay - not what we need.

Zizouz212

20:39

I think though that answers are only one half - we have to make sure that we can close questions that are polls as quickly as possible

AJ Henderson

@Zizouz212 yeah, that's pretty key too. If people see bad questions open, they will post more bad questions and quickly overrun. Early on on a couple of the arts sites I had to not only close, but even delete questions that were badly off topic and overwhelming the front page

(like, 3/4 of the questions on the front page were on hold at one point)

Zizouz212

Ouch

AJ Henderson

luckily that passed and it settled in mostly

still get the occasional question like those ones, but now closing and letting their corpses serve as reminders to others works well

Passerby

@Zizouz212 the word there is anecdotal.

Zizouz212

I haven't really been here since everything started (the private beta started during my exams, then came Canada Day, then religious holidays, and every holiday takes like, two weeks before and after to prepare and all...), so I don't know how things have played out totally.

AJ Henderson

20:42

the other thing that can help early on is deleting answers to overly subjective questions

people like to get rep, if they can get rep from a bad question, they will try

if they succeed at it, they will keep trying

Zizouz212

It's what happened here. A few of us had a discussion about it a while back, and we were kind of disappointed that 1. It wasn't a great question with all the information it needed; and 2. That it attracted the answers it did

AJ Henderson

I kind of wish the reputation system would give a bigger rep penalty for down votes if the score is net negative

Zizouz212

HNQs are kind of concerning, because they almost overwhelm the system

AJ Henderson

since it's kind of frustrating that a rather small portion of users that vote for pure opinion stuff can make it rep positive

Zizouz212

@AJHenderson The other problem, is that everybody wants to give their answer and opinion. I mean, look what happened here: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/663/…

I don't think I've ever seen Community protect a question after 20 answers

AJ Henderson

20:45

@Zizouz212 I've seen it a few times, but it's pretty rare

HDE 226868

@Zizouz212 It was protected before then.

(I believe)

Zizouz212

@HDE226868 I don't know, I just remember finding the question protected and having 20 answers, and in my mind I was like, "how is getting 20 answers even possible??"

AJ Henderson

@Zizouz212 ok, I'm blanking on HNQ

Zizouz212

Hot network Questions?

HDE 226868

@Zizouz212 It could be that there's some deleted stuff I missed.

Zizouz212

20:47

Maybe. I can see almost nothing on the site

Hey @Crafter!

AJ Henderson

@Zizouz212 wow, a lot of answers there don't even answer the question

Zizouz212

And answer it wrongly at best

HDE 226868

@AJHenderson I'm wondering what I should do about that.

AJ Henderson

granted, I'd somewhat argue the question itself isn't really great too since it is a bit convoluted between legality, safety and politeness

@HDE226868 personally, I'd nuke anything not directly approaching the question in context of the site

HDE 226868

@AJHenderson That'd be ideal if we had mods.

AJ Henderson

20:57

answering a question about if it is rude with a dissertation on the law isn't an answer. "It isn't rude to follow the law" would be the entire extent of the answer in that case and should probably be supported as to why (because I'm pretty sure I can think of situations where you could follow the law and be rude)

maybe not in this particular case, but either way

both how to safely drive and how to legally drive have absolutely nothing to do with IPS

so all the answers dwelling on that are just flat out NAA

or at best need to be edited to drastically reduce them

at which point there are many duplicate answers

well crap, and I forgot that you can't answer a protected question without actually having upvotes on that site... (the 100 rep from other sites doesn't help you)

I have an answer that shows how it should be answered that I didn't see in any of the higher voted answers

but I can't answer it :(

none of the questions start by first answering the real question. What does it mean to be rude in a driving situation

the rest of how you handle the situation flows out of your personal feelings of safety and legality based on what is and isn't rude in a driving context

ie, you aren't being rude if you are doing your best not to impede others

that's the key

HDE 226868

@AJHenderson Right, all of the answers so far assume that being rude = doing something that inconveniences others, regardless of intent.

AJ Henderson

@HDE226868 and or not being rude simply because something is safe or legal

both completely fail to understand the question in an interpersonal skills context

unfortunately I don't have the time to find something else to answer to get the rep needed to post though :/

HDE 226868

Ask a question?

AJ Henderson

interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/735/… this one is a bit forced and I'm not sure I like it, but maybe

Catija

@AJHenderson That question seems like a humblebrag.

AJ Henderson

21:13

@Catija possibly, it's unclear which way they are worried about though

which I noticed the existing answers didn't really hit on. There are two different ways that someone thinking you are flirting when you aren't can be bad

with very different responses

Catija

@AJHenderson I didn't realize you were into making video content. :D Also, I've been really thinking about taking a "pants on head" photo of Ben because of yours.

Passerby

@AJHenderson isn't not hurting someone the most important interpersonal skill? And laws that were made to prevent people from getting hurt part of that?

AJ Henderson

21:33

@Catija yeah, I'm the director of photography for season two of amazon.com/Episode-3/dp/B01N2O2UUV/…

we're shooting this summer and fall

so I'm spending about 8-10 hours every other week on that

Catija

@AJHenderson Oh! Sweet! That's exciting.

AJ Henderson

@Passerby theoretically, but laws aren't just about not hurting people. Either way details of the law is not really addressing the "what is or isn't rude"

Passerby

No, but they do inform it. Manners follow law on many things, and they often dictate it through the law making process.

It's not the end all, but referencing it doesn't hurt.

Zizouz212

@Passerby I mean, if anything, laws are derived from morality. Traffic laws are based on safety, which themselves are based on empirical evidence. So if anything, social thought would be derived from the safety argument, and not so much the legal argument the way I see it

Passerby

I have a hard time following what you just said

Zizouz212

21:48

Laws don't dictate manners - they are more a reflection of manners and social thought of society

AJ Henderson

@Zizouz212 yeah, we have an interesting twist on that with modern times. It's more of a feedback loop

in the US atleast, a lot of morality and ethics tends to follow what the supreme court decides on things

and can shift pretty crazy fast too

there's something of a feedback loop between them

Zizouz212

Yep. I'm just thinking of things in Canada too - holidays changing, things like assisted dying becoming legalized after being rejected by the courts...

AJ Henderson

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A: Is it rude to drive at the speed limit on dangerous roads when another driver wants to go faster?

To answer this, you have to start with understanding what is and isn't rude behavior in general, then understand how it relates to driving. Certainly, intentionally and unnecessarily impeding others is rude. It's also arguably rude for you to not do your best to avoid impeding others when you c...

there's my take on an answer for that question

Gypsy Spellweaver

22:05

@AJHenderson Now, That's the answer I've been waiting for! Hurrah!

HDE 226868

@AJHenderson Very nice.

Yvette Colomb

22:27

wow this room has been busy since going public - it's good to see

John

23:45

@YvetteColomb ... But the "old timers" are still here too, Yeah!

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