The Awkward Silence

6:47 AM

morning :)

Mithical

\o

Wrong keyboard on my phone. I think that's a first for me.

XD

I didn't see it, so if you hadn't mentioned it...

7:55 AM

Morning!

8:23 AM

Morning people :)

skullpatrol

8:52 AM

Hi

IPS Comment Bot

What were the terms of this "commitment"? If I were to do such a thing, I would plan 1 or 2 evenings a week and define before starting whether "we move forward 4 episodes per session and if anybody misses the train they're responsible for catching up" or "we only move on together, or don't move on at all" — Laurent S. 2 mins ago

#26403 Laurent S. (139 rep) | Q: Is there anything I can do to resolve conflict from a friend group trying to coordinate watching a multi-season show together? (score: 0) | posted 17 days ago by Austin Conlon (259 rep) | edited 31 minutes ago by Ael (16590 rep) | Toxicity 0.1424012

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic"]

skullpatrol

:-)

9:40 AM

@IPSCommentBot tp

@IPSCommentBot not this comment exactly but i'm kinda curious about the question and how it can be solved :)

Today news: a new coworker is joining the team and, from the look of it, it's possible that they will be in charge of doing all the stuff I don't like doing (because they aren't about automating tests) but that my manager still ask me to do (because they still more or less relate to quality). So, yay! :D

@Ael :D

@CaldeiraG I think everyone committing to a defined set of rules beforehand would be a good idea but there is still the issue of people not agreeing with the rules

@Ael This sounds lovely! I want a new coworker like that too :P

9:48 AM

@Tinkeringbell Hehe, that's all the harm I wish upon you :D

Hey, we just got a 'new' guy... though he's supposed to be just replacing one that's leaving, so he probably won't be doing the things I don't like doing :P

Or he will, depending on how you look at it XD

@Tinkeringbell Well, if he happens to like what you dislike and "vice-versa", maybe there is still a chance for you here? You could even trade tasks so that everyone ends up with tasks that they like :D

@Ael He'll be working on a different product, different part of the codebase. It's a part I used to work on and didn't like XD

It's like licorice candy. Some people like them, other don't. So you can trade

@Tinkeringbell Ah yeah. Well, at least they didn't give you back this codebase job you didn't like

But even within the product/part of the codebase I work in now, there's quite a few things I don't like. Mostly small issues that require more time than they should :P

9:54 AM

Hopefully, your team will grow bigger and you will then be able to give the newby the tasks that you dislike ^^

@Ael from the question it seems people are in disagreement

As a matter of fact, that's more or less how I became QA. I was the newby and people gave me test-related tasks and then realize that I actually liked it

10:49 AM

@Ael That's kinda the best way to get to do things :D

12:56 PM

Hey @ArthurHv how are you? You've been quiet...

i'm fine, thank you !

lost the habit of going to chat, busy either working or playing games

Ahh, the game addiction ;) Sounds good though, glad to know you're okay!

What have you been playing?

League of Legends. I kind of feel it's not my age though

too old for this kinda

no one is too old for games :P

I'm of the opinion you're never too old for games, but that it helps if you can find people your age to play with to convince you you're not too old ;)

1:02 PM

^^

it does have a younger playerbase

as most of the games anyway

I don't really know if i'm well, i'm concerned about my game time

i made the count of hours a week spent playing, its daunting

Simple check list: Are there things you should be doing instead?

Not really, maybe small details like help a bit more for cleaning, spend more time cooking maybe

Okay. Well in that case, be weary, perhaps do those little bits of extra help... and then don't feel guilty about the gaming! It's... about all there is to do during a pandemic.

1:04 PM

it's kind of infortunate yea

It's not like reading fantasy novels or watching TV is more productive, unless you watch TV with your partner and they now feel ignored ;)

well my psychiatrist think it could affect my stability

Well the psychiatrist might know you best... Next time you see them, ask for a list of what else they think you should be doing XD

well thats the pain point, he knows that I have very small circle of interest

if not that particular game, then either other games, or work overtime

this have been like this for a decade

still, he think I should find interest centers that don't go in video games

That sounds a bit silly to me. I can teach you to crochet, though? :P

1:08 PM

where he can be right is that I feel a little jaded these days and i'm quite sure it relates to incresed time playing

Hmmm.

I think it's kinda natural that many people get bored around this time, are you getting bored playing the game as well?

Or are playing more because you're bored?

(I play more, but then become bored of playing too...)

im bored by most things that aren't gaming. I kind of feel the world is pointless, relationships are overrated, work is slavery, so I feel like going in my small refuge of illusions playing. Does that make sense ?

Yep!

nonetheless things aren't perfect there and you can spend a whole hour playing and be frustrated because of some loss or whatever.

people also flame each other in this game, for silly reasons.

I mean, it does sound a bit dangerous, if those feelings are making it so you only want to game. Though it could also just be the whole thing with a pandemic going on, still having to work, but there not being anything but work and time at home anymore...

I can see it happening here a bit too... to me the world always was pointless btw, but I have friends I can go out with, have a drink or go to a movie, or who would just come by for tea and a chat... that's gone now. Work feels more like I'm selling myself for money that I don't really need, especially when both the company and the client are trying to get more time out of me for purposeless meetings (so far I've been able to decline almost all of them)...

I guess I still want to work though, as I spent my vacation being even more bored XD

M.A.R.

1:23 PM

@Mithical noob keyboard mistaker

aroged.com/2020/11/…

@Tinkeringbell Can't say it's not dangerous. I'm preoccupied. Note that even before I game things were going sour. I went on a trip of 7 days in Corsica only to wish being home like at least half the days.

I don't enjoy time with friends or family really much either. We just sit there stuck in our jobs watching ourselves age. Even the people that claim doing tremendous experience traveling, I don't envy.

@ArthurHv Again... that sounds quite normal to me XD. Though my family just sucks, so that's why I don't enjoy time with them... Never liked travel, here...

@ArthurHv It sounds to me like you might be having depression. Did your therapist talked to you about drugs for that?

@Ael I am under drugs for bipolarity treatment. It's supposed to stabilize depression. If it fails there is nothing that works. Classical antidepressant can cause us severe after effects (usually accelerated cycles of mania)

My therapist knows all the details.

@Tinkeringbell It's just tough for me to fall back on something...

1:40 PM

@ArthurHv Yeah, sounds rough :(

We're here?

:D

;)

@ArthurHv Ah, I see

I don't know, I could list a whole list of hobbies that also don't require seeing other people :P

They... don't give the world a point and they don't improve the meaning of relationships, but at least it's something else to do besides gaming, which might help with the boredom ;)

In any case, with winter coming (and lockdown not helping) just make sure to have enough vitamin D. Apparently, half of France don't have enough of it during winter ^^

I think i'll start with reading. But I don't really know what to read. I don't relate to many people taste.

1:43 PM

@ArthurHv I'm currently reading a lot of comics on webtoon. I enjoy a lot of them and, even if I don't, it's free so I'm not wasting any money

@ArthurHv Hmm, I've found some chatrooms quite adept at finding related/similar books... do you have one that's something you'd like, so you want to read similar stuff?

As for other people taste, maybe you should join a facebook reading group or something similar. This way you can tell people "I liked this, what else might I like?"

(or, are you more like me and all over the place? XD)

Also, if you liked a book, you can looked it up on "Goodread" and the site will suggest other similar books

I liked for ex. Asimov Foundation cycle (I know it's SF but its not the fantasy part that interested me), American Psycho, or Dorian's grey portrait, also a polar by Truman Capote. Idk I've read many classics because they are cheap in price but they usually have something quite interesting.

I also tried to read thrillers in English (because thats what my bookshop had) but I'm not sure how to get them except ordering.

1:52 PM

@ArthurHv Here is the Goodread list for similar book to Foundation 1: goodreads.com/book/similar/1783981-foundation

If you are into classic, I personally suggest: "Fahrenheit 451" or "Dune". You could also try "Dragon of Pern"

M.A.R.

2:13 PM

Read Brave New World. It was pretty awesome.

I think you might like H.P. Lovecraft too.

M.A.R.

Huxley and Bradbury foretold roughly the same dystopia.

2:36 PM

@Tinkeringbell Apparently Lovecraft books are full of racism though

Ehhh... I think Twitter made that one bigger than it is. The books talk about horrors from outer space and people breeding/mixing with that, and use that to create a scary/tense atmosphere, so yeah there'll be dislike for that. Also: some of the stories are set within a timeframe/period where that was the way people looked at the world.
It would be superweird to have someone travel by carriage or steam train through what's supposed to be much like the 'real world' otherwise, yet this person holds all the believes and prejudices of a present day liberal/left-leaning political person!

Sure, if you can't read them without knowing this is not how the world is supposed to work and posting the stories on a QAnon Facebook site as the absolute truth, you're better off with other books. But that goes for so many books...

I'd put the Bible on the same list then.

There was a question on SO whether its possible to make fantasy without racist tropes by the way, it was kind of interesting read

SO?

;)

I would recommend 'Utopia' by Thomas Moore, I think, for 'fantasy without racist tropes' :P

Q: What do I do when nobody answers my e-mails anymore, and nobody answers my questions online?

@Tinkeringbell I'm not following you ^^' Anyway, my source wasn't Twitter and I just wanted to say "be careful with that" because some of his book are blatantly racist (and some are more "subtle" in that way) and you might not to want to read something that is so infused in racism because it might be depressing to you

Extroverted Main Man

0

I have sent many e-mails to companies and asked numerous questions on here, which just go unanswered. No reply whatsoever. They are not rude, unreasonable, or in any way mal-intentioned. I've noticed this in recent years, that even websites that "welcome feedback" and seem to encourage you to con...

2:48 PM

@Ael Oh, I've read most of the stories multiple times already, don't worry.

So if Arthur wants my opinion on it: They're good stories if you don't overanalyze them for signs of racism like some people do ;) But maybe knowing some people have seen it may have already ruined the stories for him.

@Ael Do you know 'Uncle Tom's Cabin'?

@Tinkeringbell No, why?

@Ael Thought I might use it as an example to explain that message you couldn't follow a bit better, but that's not going to work then XD

@Tinkeringbell Sorry ^^

I'm not really into "old" book

No worries! I read it in basic school, so I thought maybe you might know it too :P

> In addition to these notorious cartoons, many Warner Bros. cartoons contain fleeting or sometimes extended gags that make reference to racial or ethnic stereotypes.

>

The release of the Looney Tunes Golden Collection: Volume 3 includes a disclaimer at the beginning of each DVD in the volume given by Whoopi Goldberg which explains that the cartoons are products of their time and contain racial and ethnic stereotypes that "were wrong then and they are wrong today", but the cartoons are presented on the DVD uncut and uncensored because "editing them would be the same as denying that the stereotypes existed."

Ever heard about that, then?

I'm not surprised but I don't think I read anything about it before

In any case, old stuff are indeed full of racism and other "-ism" but some are full of it more than others

3:03 PM

well, look at the Lovecraft books the same way. They're good stories, and they would make no sense when censoring or rewriting them.

I think part of reading historical stuff is indeed knowing you'll have to deal with whatever behavior was okay at the time.

It's... not really useful to put everything against current day norms and values. In fact, that's one of the first behaviors they beat out of an archaeologist in university XD

I am not suggesting we should rewrite them. And I am not talking about censoring either. I just believe that people should know that their is racism in a book before reading it. It's basically a "content warning"

Q: How can I ask my almost roommate to leave?

Every book has a content warning already... it's called the summary on the back of the book ;)

I don't think these need a content warning any more than any other book would need one.

Extroverted Main Man

0

I live in a house/apartment I own for the past three years. The house is a two bedroom apartment and for the last 1.5 I have a roomate which is also one of my best friends. Since March we decided to host another friend of ours for a couple of months so she can take part in some exams for a master...

friends roommates

@ExtrovertedMainMan ^What should I do...

@Tinkeringbell Well, I don't agree

Also, there are things a summary doesn't tell you

3:16 PM

@Ael Yeah, I noticed that... Too bad. You might've ruined a good story for someone this way.

@Tinkeringbell I don't see how I did that, but ok...

@Ael By prejudicing them against the writer of those stories, and lumping all the stories under one label.

3:44 PM

@ExtrovertedMainMan start by making good questions ;)

This conversation about racism remind me of a thought i was toying with

I feel like we are in a historical time where people have the most space to express themselves and they are increasingly worried about not hurting each other with words

@ArthurHv That's one part. Are you interested in reading sociology?

sure

Example of that is Github renaming master repo to main :/

what i was toying with is

3:50 PM

and now Chrome too

what if the more we are cautious, the least is needed to hurt people

I can highly recommend "The Rise of Victimhood Culture" by Bradley Keith Campbell . It talks about exactly your last point ;)

How the 'big' problems are all solved, and how people now make smaller problems into 'big' ones so they still have 'big' problems to solve :) And how that creates a society where 'victims' are valued because they can still be 'solved'.

Read it like you would any other sociology book though! It's a framework to put some of the things that are happening in, but it's not a solution to anything :(

sociology is always so pessimistic :D

Q: POHow To Deal With A Brother Who Takes Every Argument As A Sign I Don't Want Him Living? LONG

Not always. The good thing I learned from sociology is that norms/values/societies change constantly, and as such it's no big deal to not care :P Because whatever the future brings, you would've done it wrong anyways.

Extroverted Main Man

0

Trigger warning: suicide, I guess. Note: I came to my parents with these issues a few months ago. They got onto him once, he did better for a week, and then he went back to old habits. I am 14 and I have 3 younger brothers. I have a solid relationship with 2 of my 3 brothers. However, with the ot...

siblings suicide

4:24 PM

@ExtrovertedMainMan eyes-needed

I already flagged as a should-i question