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Q: Interacting with over-anxious friend

TransientEntityI have a young friend (25 years old) who keep complaining to me by message regarding each and every little problems he is facing in life, dramatizing those to the extreme. He seems in constant state of very high anxiety. Recurring topics: His inability to find a girlfriend or approaching girls ...

 
5 hours later…
05:22
15 messages moved to Trash
A J
A J
Morning!
Morning :)
05:36
Morning!
A J
A J
It's Teacher's Day here.
JAD
JAD
06:11
ola
06:47
good morning
07:05
Morning
Okay? '^.^
(I'm finally at the office, where I can get some. I'm happy ;) )
Ah, thats the context I would have required I suppose :D Great, go for it :P
Morning :)
@Tinkeringbell Coffee yay :p
07:22
I got a yummy mango Monster Energy drink this morning
because I dont like coffee :o
@undefined ooh, that's odd
You can try some other flavours
softer or more chocolaty,
@undefined I like the can of those, but their taste is way too artificially sweet if you asked me. ^^
08:03
No Monster energy drinks for me, coffee :P
I'm drinking my third coffee of the day :p
08:14
Second now. Just had a very long first coffee break with an (ex) teammate and coworker .
08:26
@ankiiiiiii I dont know, I always feel dizzy and weird after I drink coffee
@dhein thats very true but the Mango one is one which taste much better than many others
I'm eating a cheese pretzel right now :3
08:41
I'm getting kinda hungry now. Lunch is still almost 1,5 hours away.
ohoh maybe you can get a yummy snack?
Snacks are bad :P
And our office has just decided to stop providing free fruit, so I should probably start bringing my own ;)
how mean of them :/
we have snack machine, containing all kinds of chocolate, chips, cake, nuts, sweets and so on :3
Oh well, I can understand. It costs a small fortune ;)
@undefined Yeah, those are the kinds of stuff I want to stay away from during the week ;)
in the company I worked before we even had a hot sausage machine, that was soooo cool
you could choose between different sausages and then the machine heat them up in seconds. You could even get mustard and ketchup
I bought one sausage every day, sometimes even two :3
I'm missing that machine
08:48
That's not going to float at most large companies over here anymore. It seems they all have their own 'fit and healthy' agenda's (something about corporate responsibility too, I guess), so I see them more and more getting rid of snacks/drinks, and promoting healthier food.
The one over here even does surprise meatless Mondays, so it's always a guess whether you can have a normal lunch or a gross one :P
sad things happens
'surprise meatless Mondays' sounds so mean :D
It is... because if it wasn't 'surprise', I could just bring my own sandwich (with meat) for lunch!
yes but if you dont know you cant prepere :/
I mean you could still bring some sandwishes ant just eat them later as like a second lunch :3
aw now I'm craving some yummy sandwiches
08:54
You're sounding like a little Hobbit :P
Two lunches? :P That should help me lose weight XD
Hobbits are cute
And a bit badass ;)
ow no, that would help you much with that. But for me a good yummy lunch is always something nice, I make omnomnom sandwiches :3 and poooff all gone in my little belly
but its long ago since I had a yummy sandwich :/
A J
A J
@Tinkeringbell Why? You ran out of milk at home? :P
@AJ Coffee at home is too much work :P
Especially at 6 am
A J
A J
09:05
@Tinkeringbell Is it? Just boil the milk and add some coffee and sugar and coffee is ready. :P yeah it's a lot of work to clean the utensils after that. ;)
https://interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/22863/12962

top tier answer @avazula :p
@undefined Woah, would love something like that :p
@Tinkeringbell Well that's a bit strange :p but maybe good?
@CaldeiraG Meh. I'm more leaning towards climate change and pollution being a problem for big companies to solve, and not a big supporter of putting that burden on individual people.
Things like meatless monday should be a choice, so that the people who do it can feel good about themselves, instead of being grumpy for lack of tasty lunch options.
@Tinkeringbell well, I fully agree on that
@Tinkeringbell Me too, climate change should be addressed more than ever
I'm a very reasonable person, from time to time ;)
JAD
JAD
@Tinkeringbell hmm, I'd hate that. I'm a sucker for consistency. Always have the same for lunch
09:18
@JAD Same, I prefer that too :)
I can adapt, but it still makes me feel a bit angry at being forced to do so in such a way.
09:46
@CaldeiraG aaw, thanks :) those were tough times though
@avazula Yeah, I imagine it was
09:59
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Q: Can I inspire a friend to use critical thinking?

SomeRandomCatI have a very close, very intelligent friend. We like to talk about "brainy" stuff, but in quite different ways. While I like to reflect and take apart knowledge and, generally, approach it critically, he's only interested in learning it and, to be unflattering, show off all the things he has lea...

I agree with Caldeira, your answer is amazing @ava <3
Also, Hi everyone :D
Guess what? My part-time has been accepted and I will only work 27h/week from now on!!! \o/
(ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ*:・゚✧
A J
A J
10:16
@Ælis Conparttimulation
@Ælis \o/ great :D
@AJ I have no idea what this word means, but thanks anyway :D
@CaldeiraG And thanks to you too :D
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Q: Friend is very nit picky about side comments I don't intend to be taken too seriously

user24255I have a friend who seems to hyper analyze everything I say and gets upset with things he thinks I didn't give much thought to. One example is: we were hanging out and talking about card games that involve bluffing, like poker. I said I don't believe in tells that give off when someone is lying...

Any thought on this question? Right now, it's sound opinion-based/too broad, but if you see a good edit to save it, feel free to do so
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@Ælis Con-part-time-ulation. I mixed the word "part time" in congratulations.
10:25
@AJ Oh dear xD I believe my joke detector to be a bit rusty :p
A J
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lol
tomorrow is Friday
I have a five days off coming up.
this sunday is my birthday :)
A J
A J
gonna wish you on that day.
@AJ Nice! Why is that?
Thursday 11AM, 2 questions made :p this last one seems interesting
A J
A J
10:40
@Ælis Well, Saturday and Sunday, and attending a ceremony at in-laws and my birthday.
Oh, then you and undefine are (almost?) born the same day!
A J
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well, a difference of a few days.
11:04
@Ælis YAY!
11:20
nice :3
maybe my parents are going to come and then we do something together
otherwise I'm going alone to a bar and get some expensive drinks :D
My parents will be gone, so my brother and I will probably have a tiny party with some of the alcohol we bought in Germany ;)
@Tinkeringbell: Heya, can I ask you here quickly rather than extending the comments of my meta post?
hehe nice. because its cheaper here? If yes then I guess you're from on of the northern countries?
11:24
@dhein Sure! BTW, Meta has it's own chatroom too: chat.meta.stackexchange.com/rooms/89/tavern-on-the-meta ;) But here is fine.
@undefined Yes, and no :P At least, I wouldn't call The Netherlands northern ;)
ahh okay, I more thought about Denmark and so on
I've heard it's even more expensive in those countries, yeah. But even just for The Netherlands things can be a lot cheaper (think 10 euros a bottle).
I was only a few times in the Netherlands, buying some, ehm, plants
but you have hagelslag and vla :33
@undefined and stroopwafels!
Don't forget the liquorice either ;P
true but as a kid I loved the hagelslag the most
11:34
hagelslag is awesome :)
yaaa very much awesome
which on do you like the most?
I like this black and white curly one the most (those tiny, courly bands) and the colorful fruity soft ones
Mostly the chocolate ones. I'm not very fond of the fruity stuff.
mhm I see :)
passing by: apple.stackexchange.com/questions/368183/… the longest question I have seen so far. And that too so well formatted. No surprise if OP finds the answer themselves.
@ankiiiiiii They are certainly bigger questions around SE; true :)
Maybe a SEDE query can figure that out?
@ankiiiiiii If they found the answer themselves, perhaps comment and encourage them to split the Q up (the solution seems at the bottom?). That way, the Q is easier to read and the answer quicker to see :P
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This answer used to be the highest voted answer of M&TV but not any longer
This is the longest question on Superuser, it got closed and the question is not formatted at all but somehow it got an answer
probably if you copy that query to another site, you can check it out on other sites
A J
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Q: How to restore harmony between my family and my wife or is it necessary?

Ray TsaiBackground I married my wife 2 years ago after we dated for about a year. There has been ongoing conflicts between my wife and my family, which I will elaborate below. My wife is Korean, I am Taiwanese. We both live overseas. My mum lives in Taiwan. During the time of these conflicts below, I ...

Longest on IPS
A J
A J
11:53
93
A: Dealing with somebody who's ignoring my very existence

Everly FoxtonI hesitate to suggest shunning her like the other answers suggest. It seems like it might work, but it also seems like it could be traumatic for her. A little about autism I think it's worth knowing a little about how she may see the problem. This is based on my own experience with autism, whic...

Longest answer
Well that is big :P
A J
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83
A: Is Agrabah in India?

Cearon O'FlynnUnlikely If we look at the source material Aladdin is set in China, and implies that Aladdin is Chinese, however, certain aspects of the story contradict this: The ruler is referred to as Sultan, a title rooted in Arabic, instead of Emperor as might be expected in China. The inhabitants are a...

on M&TV
@CaldeiraG It's an awesome answer (that in the end, didn't really worked as the whole friend group kinda fell apart) ;)
@Tinkeringbell Good :p (well that's unfortunate). I didn't read it all but I might do :)
@CaldeiraG the overview I think is that their AppleScript needs some tweaks. But they've included IMAP settings etc too.
@AJ ah well SO has some tutorial level answers too. But this one is great too. Could have used smaller and side-by-side images though
@Tinkeringbell will keep an eye on it :)
@CaldeiraG pasting output must have increased character count, but OP put very less effort to solve it.
@AJ wow! Some people are super helpful at some days.
I was passing by and I dug up some good questions and answers ^^
@AJ this one must have had some copyright issues. not that I wish for it, but just a possibility.
12:13
@Tinkeringbell Ooh, I had stroopwafels for the first time on the plane ride back from my honeymoon. They were delicious
@ankiiiiiii True, that was supposed to be a Excel table like the answer
@Rainbacon Nice! :D
Which plane company offers those? ;)
The OP included a file for his workbook but better not click any links to download, better be safe than sorry
Surprisingly, United Airlines
@ankiiiiiii Well, I don't have a clue about that, never used apple products XD
12:17
Anyone have thoughts on this question? It feels POB, but definitely borderline
well AppleScript is written in English and yes native mail app isn't great to use either.
There is a channel on YT who makes videos of some plane companies and compare every class (first, business, premium economy and economy) experiences
It really depends of the staff on the plane too
@ankiiiiiii That's a different question from the same user though
@ankiiiiiii I see :p
12:42
Eyes needed here (seems off-topic to me)
@Ælis would better fit to academia.stackexchange in my opinion
@undefined It as already been migrated once. I'm not going to suggest a migration unless I'm an 100% sure it would be on-topic there
questions about professors behaiving are common there. But I cant say for sure
It's roughly looking like an etiquette question but it's too localized for me
Looks like a etiquette question to me and to migrate to Academia, we need to make sure it's on-topic here
Because it is about etiquette better stay here, needs some improvements
12:46
@avazula Yeah, if there was more example, it could work. But here, it only has one :/
It came from English.SE so i guess it's normal to be localized because the OP thought about english usage rather than asking a polite way to thank him
I think what it is missing is a more clear goal. Right now it reads as, "my professor said my email was impolite, was it?" which clearly goes against the guidance we have in the help center
I don't know that I want to close it because that would reject the migration, and I think it could have value here (certainly more so than on ELU), but it needs some work
on academia are questions like "Q: “Sorry to bother you” in an email?" and the like. I feel like this question would be more on topic there
@undefined just because a question is on topic on another stack does not mean it should be migrated
because its asking not general but in academic area
I know @Rainbacon I still think it would get better answers there
12:51
A question should only be migrated if it is blatantly off topic on the site where it was asked but is a good fit for somewhere else, or if the OP requests to have it migrated
The question already has a not backup answer (if someone wants to leave a comment), we probably should decide quickly what to do
I wish there was an option to close without rejecting the migration
@Rainbacon Yeah, it seems this is one point. The other is that without a culture tag, we can't really say if it's polite or not (only from our own cultural background, which may be the wrong one).
Well, unless the OP comes here and creates an account to provide that info, it's going to stay as it is
According to the OP's profile on ELU they are from India, but that doesn't give us any context about the professor
Do users get a notification when their question gets migrated?
13:07
@Rainbacon I don't know.
It seems there is a notification: meta.stackexchange.com/q/29344/369802
So don't hesitate on the closing for too long if you're just waiting for OP to turn up :/
I just cast a close vote
Don't want more low quality answers, although I'm quite certain that the one it already got was a user that followed the question here from ELU
@Rainbacon Yep, probably :)
13:23
Well, next time this coworker tells me "I will be available in 10 minutes", I won't trust them. It's been 40 minutes already ^^
Did you actually remind them already that 10 minutes are up? :)
Yep, 20 minutes ago ><
Ah. That's indeed quite annoying then.
@Ælis My wife and I both felt the same way about the bus this morning
@Rainbacon Ahah x) At least you had each other to keep you company, right?
13:27
Not quite, we take different busses to work
So we were waiting at different bus stops
Arf :/ Too bad for both of you then. I'm happy I don't take the bus anymore. Metro and tram are much more reliable
@Ælis @Rainbacon you voted to close this question but no one posted an explanation comment ... could someone fix it please? interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/22864/…
Make sure you're not unintentionally "kafkatrapping" them, i.e. using their denial as evidence of guilt. en.wiktionary.org/wiki/KafkatrapHugo Zink 1 min ago
#14219 Hugo Zink (101 rep) | Q: How can I effectively tell people that their defensiveness over me bringing up an issue is part of the issue? (score: 30) | posted 484 days ago by apaul (50890 rep) | edited 480 days ago by apaul (50890 rep) | Toxicity 0.34591717 | Comment on inactive post
13:45
@avazula I'll try to write one
@Rainbacon thank you :)
Comment posted, let me know what you think of it
14:05
@Rainbacon it seems good :)
14:36
While going on the internet and for fun typing my online name in google I found this: bn.switch-case.com/50969508 someone basically copied it and translated a lot in bengali, I thought it was best to report it here since the original question was from this place
@Termatinator Translating stuff is okay, actually. Let me look up something for you :)
@Termatinator Since the page contain a link to the original question, I believe it's fine
meta.stackexchange.com/q/200177/369802 < This one. They follow every rule: Link back to the original post, and original author, and have the CC BY SA license in the footer :)
@Termatinator I had this too, it's weird but it's part of how SE works :)
ah ok, guess it's not a big security issue either since I don't see any info that I didn't already put there, thx tho, it weirded me out big time
14:44
@Termatinator Yeah, I can imagine that! Look at it this way: Your post was popular enough to be translated! :D
looking at it a bit more, they did do it to a lot of questions, I have seen the stack exchange symbol somewhere down in the footer at my question, but could it be a proxy? considering the amount? bn.switch-case.com/cat95
anyway, I'm off again, will be back a bit later today tho, just thought I had to mention this here, all have a great day!
@Termatinator Looks like a proxy of SE (different design though) but in bengali
You too! I don't think it's a proxy. From what I can gather from the meta question, proxies try to trick people into thinking they're actually on SO for malicious purposes, and their layout and web address is different enough that I wouldn't worry about that.
they mention the source of it though
they follow the attribution requirements like Tink said so i guess it's not a problem?
Me at money.SE and law.SE:
[Reads question]
...
[Flags as too broad]
...
[Answers a blog post answering every question and side story]
16:02
Augh, you beat me to it by 32 seconds! Have a +1 :) — Onyz 46 secs ago
#22868 Onyz (1147 rep) | A: Friend is very nit picky about side comments I don't intend to be taken too seriously (score: 1) | posted 2 minutes ago by Kate Gregory (33040 rep) | Toxicity 0.18689588 | tps/fps: 0/0
Matched regex(es) ["+1"]
 
1 hour later…
17:08
@IPSCommentBot tp
17:35
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Q: How should we respond to questions when someone involved, but not OP, needs professional help?

Lux ClaridgeThere's a similar question here on meta that asks how to respond to questions where OP needs professional help. Then someone wrote an answer to a question on the main site stating that the one of the parties involved, not the OP but their neighbor, may be mentally ill. The answer was initially p...

 
2 hours later…
19:20
@Termatinator good luck to them copying the longer questions, @CaldeiraG pointed out
19:31
@Terminator @CaldeiraG @AbrahamLincoln meta.stackexchange.com/questions/200177/…
I have six chatrooms open and all of them are boring.
Y U MAEK ME READ THIGNS q_q
I can be non-boring, I hope?
But you have fun stuff to do IRL already
I was half-expecting Ankit to show up in The Screening Room and make another rant about Disney
19:34
I have this quirk of wanting to be correct in an argument online
You're right!
@M.A.R. fun scohe fact: I read/say "IRL" and "URL" as "Earl," which leads to my friends teasing me that earl.com is an Earl URL, IRL
Also... meta.stackexchange.com/questions/333089/… is a really nice way of putting what I was thinking when reading that post.
Well I call here Eeps, so we're kinda even in a non-competing sorta way
@Tinkeringbell That is way cuter than the show(s)
Certified
Yeah, you're making us sound like creeps ;)
@M.A.R. which show(s)?
I don't remember making a show character :P
19:36
I dunno. My little horse.
Calling a pony "little" is probably redundant.
Oh, no... not at all, mine is way prettier indeed! :P
@M.A.R. XD You're making me miss Derpy...
So it probably should have been "My . . . horse. Just, y'know, horse"
But it's a unicorn!
Much rarer than horses, or even purple colored little horses!
@Tinkeringbell They still frequent this chat in some corner of the world I forgot
It's Sugarcube Corner in SciFiFa's chat
@M.A.R. Yeah, and they dropped a few lines in the Tavers a few weeks back... perhaps they'll return someday :)
19:38
@M.A.R. noob
I'm so good at calling things. Checks "discover your talent of the day"
@Mithrandir Hey, I'm not Agent Smith, OK
Imagining @Mith as Hugo Weaving with cargo pants
Oh hehe I need a Photoshop favor ASAP
*has no idea who Hugo Weaving is*
@Mithrandir How do you not know Elrond?
How can you claim to be an LOTR fan. Air conditioning on you.
@Rainbacon I've never watched the movies.
19:40
@M.A.R. Where'd you get that idea from? O.o
@Rainbacon Jinx
@Mithrandir24601 The fact that you probably have a dozen ultra wide screens monitoring everything ever said on the internet for glitches in the matrix.
Nah, they're quantum screens.
Only that makes having 6 silent chatrooms open a noob move.
@Mithrandir You should, if for no other reason than the fact that the LOTR movies have an absolutely amazing score (as a whole they are easily my favorite movie score ever)
I mean... what screens?
19:41
Heh, Hugo Weaving is an actor where I haven't made the connection between name and face. But mention Elrond or Mr. Smith (the Matrix) and I know who you're talking about.
@Rainbacon Oh, I know the soundtrack. That I know well :P
@Mithrandir Sssshhh! They're not supposed to know the secret! :P
@Mithrandir It's even better when you are watching what it soundtracks :)
. . . This is so bloody confusing, Mith Smiths.
Oh now I know why I like teasing you. You're really called Mith Smiths in real-life.
It's like something on a Starbucks menu.
@Rainbacon Maybe. I haven't had much time for movies lately, though.
19:42
Never been to Starbucks. Do they have menus?
...I've barely had time for SE. In fact, I should be sleeping, but I'm here instead.
Also, I'm gonna petition to have "menu"'s plural to be menuae.
No sleeping in this chhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
@Mithrandir As my old roommate always says, "you can sleep when you're dead"
19:45
The Bureau of Menuae
Starring Matt Daemon
@Rainbacon I was supposed to have a competition tomorrow, so.... yeah. Fell through, though, or I wouldn't be here. You kinda need to sleep before competing...
And Emily Bleaunt.
French for a blunt Emily
@Mithrandir Aww
@Mithrandir I'm assuming a bike competition?
19:47
@M.A.R. I prefer my Emily's to be sharp
I prefer them to be Dutch
I'm not blunt.
@Mithrandir You should turn off your blue light filter, and I'd post some models for brightly colored jeans. That would make you feel heavy
Am sleepy though. Night!
Goedenacht
Aw yiss, I got it right
19:49
@Tinkeringbell I beg to differ.
;)
no u is what he's saying.
It seemed to be hard to put into words.
@M.A.R. Well done. Jij ook welterusten!
@Mithrandir Okay, just a little then. But that's exactly what's needed sometimes!
When everyone is sharp it's like a china in a bull shop
@M.A.R. that explains its appearance on home page. @Rainbacon's edit
@Tinkeringbell that explains this..
yesterday, by Tinkeringbell
@ankiiiiiii For that question above? You can check someone's last seen on their profile page I believe? But there's not a way to see if they have seen stuff like those blue checkmarks on whatsapp.
How's that blunt?
19:59
because it's kinda weird to listen someone telling me to check the last seen on the profile
I do it all the time
user15026
Right, but not everyone might know you can do that
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