The Awkward Silence

12:00 AM

I am fully aware what are the purpose of comments.

user15026

@JA Do you mean a diamond moderator, or a user with a lot of rep and thus moderation type privileges?

But I've been stumbling upon instances where my comments are being erased almost immediately without allowing the user addressed in such comment acknowledge or even read my message.

I understand real moderators have a way to see comment history and you would be able to confirm my claim.

ArtOfCode

@JA so a diamond moderator? Have you got some examples?

J A

yes, 1 sec, please

ArtOfCode

(also, standard disclaimer: Comments on SE in general are ephemeral and get deleted a lot; comments on IPS are moderated even more strictly than that because the site's past has shown that to be necessary)

J A

12:07 AM

I know they are ephemeral, and I don't worry about them being deleted eventually, but I've noticed how they are kept there at least until such comments were acknowledged, if they are causing long-winded discussion they tend to move them to a chat, if they are abusive they simply get erased

Despite my unpopular answer, my comment was not rude or abusive in this instance: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/14474/17519

And it isn't the only one.

ArtOfCode

@JA do you recall what your comment was?

J A

But this instance was the most notorious.

I have it on a clipboard. The question is, can you see the history of comments erased including the times?

If not, we would enter a landscape of guesses and accusations based on credibility, and it would be pointless.

Catija

There's nothing about your comment that seems like it needs to stay.

J A

I don't want my comment to stay, it takes bandwidth

Catija

It's been deleted five times... and you posted it five times. That's... not a good sign.

J A

12:12 AM

I just want to respond to the OP

Not a good sign of what? That's a good question.

Catija

Your comment has nothing to do with your answer or the question.

ArtOfCode

If you're making a suggestion or asking the author to clarify something about their answer, that's fine. If it's neither of those things, then it doesn't belong in a comment.

J A

I can show you plenty of comments all around the SE network where comments are kept for a while in spite of them not being directly related to the question or answer.

Catija

@JA Not a good sign that you're accepting the fact that it's not an appropriate comment.

@ArtOfCode He is the OP of the answer.

> Thank you for the reassurance yep. My answer has almost as many upvotes than downvotes, as most of my answers on this site tend to have because my answers are a tad controversial, that's ok, it only means I'll end up accidentally earning a rare badge, one of these days any of my unpopular answers will get accepted.
I've been analyzing the culture around here and it seems that people tend to prefer advice that will keep everyone on their safe zone, and my methods are different but very effective, at least for me, I provide the same advice I'd appreciate, which usually involves a bit of bra…

ArtOfCode

Oh that comment

J A

12:15 AM

They are kept for a while to keep the conversation going, in the spirit of allowing users to communicate and be nice to eachother.

ArtOfCode

I thought it got reported here 5 times because the bot was buggy

11 mins ago, by ArtOfCode

(also, standard disclaimer: Comments on SE in general are ephemeral and get deleted a lot; comments on IPS are moderated even more strictly than that because the site's past has shown that to be necessary)

Catija

No. It's literally been posted five times.

ArtOfCode

that does indeed happen sometimes elsewhere on the network, but it doesn't here on IPS

Catija

There's no "conversation" on posts.

J A

The author of the question was commenting he liked my answer and I was showing my appreciation for his gesture, that is perfect adequate behavior.

Villatoro

12:17 AM

@gbianchi si... mas que una tabla es como saber si un registro, tiene registros hijos en alguna de todas las tablas con las que tiene relaciones

ArtOfCode

@Villatoro I think you meant to post that in another room :)

J A

It's literally being deleted seconds after being posted.

Obstructing user experience.

ArtOfCode

@JA Thanking someone isn't rude, no, but it's also not necessary; neither your comment nor the comment you're replying to should have been posted at all.

Particularly using a feature that's not intended for it. Particularly on a site where that's strictly enforced.

@JA this is because you keep posting it after moderators keep deleting it. Do you understand why that's not okay?

J A

I understand their privileges are being used in an unbalanced manner.

Obstructing communication with a user

ArtOfCode

Answer the question, please.

J A

12:22 AM

Effectively ruining the experience and ruining the opportunity for the OP to provide insight on how to improve the answer.

I just did

ArtOfCode

Do you understand why repeatedly posting a comment after moderators have deleted it is not okay?

That's a yes or no answer. I'm quite happy to elucidate if you don't, but if you do then it needs to stop.

J A

I understand that it depends

They are not god

There are rules on how to moderate comments, being misused

ArtOfCode

Okay, let's try this: Do you understand that as a user of this site you have to follow its policies and rules?

J A

A loophole taken advantage of to censor me

Catija

@JA Moderators haven't been deleting your comments.

Users have.

J A

12:24 AM

Just like a citizen understands to be expected to follow the law

Catija

That means three people on all five occasions have decided that your comment needed to be deleted.

J A

And still, there are elements abusing their power hiding behind their authority as figures of the law

It's the same thing

Catija

That's literally how the system is designed to work.

There's no "law" here.

J A

I'm a user, and I can't delete comments, don't twist the truth Catija

ArtOfCode

Okay, lemme put this plainly: @JA this is not abuse of power. This is the people who have been appointed to enforce policy doing just that - enforcing policy. Whether you agree with it or not, you need to listen to them.

@JA Three flags on a comment from regular users will delete it.

Catija

12:26 AM

This is a community-moderated network. Your comments were deleted by users who felt that they failed to meet the guidelines of what we require in a comment.

J A

I'm sure if you scan through comment history you'll find more of my comments being flagged by the very same user

And that user might very well be user with mod privileges

Catija

I'm not sure why that matters... again, three users ... not one.

ArtOfCode

@JA Moderators are here to enforce policy. Part of that is deleting comments that don't belong in comments. If you disagree with which comments they've deleted, the correct response is to take it to meta, not to keep doing the thing they're stopping you from doing in some sort of protest. That's just asking for trouble.

J A

A good algorithm could determine if such users are being commanded by the same person even if using different ip addresses

As there is no point to continue with this discussion

ArtOfCode

@JA We have tools to look at that. They're not.

J A

12:29 AM

I'll disengage now

I was not aiming to win

Simply to raise my concern

ArtOfCode

Consider it raised; if you're not satisfied with the response then please take it to meta.

J A

Thank you for your input, Catija and ArtOfCode

Catija

Your concern is noted. Please note that this site has deleted in excess of 16K comments in 10 months... that's our policy. It's on meta.

J A

You can erase all my comments, that's ok, it is non-transcendental after the OP reads

Vogel612

no.

it's non-transcendental if it does not contribute to the post.

it's utterly irrelevant whether the person you intended to read the comment did in fact get it

scohe001

2:45 AM

(long chain of messages incoming, sorry in advance! Also let me know if there is a better medium to express this kind of thing to a specific user in the future (I thought about meta but I really don't think a whole meta post dedicated to one person is a good idea)

@JA I empathize with you, I really do. My first few months on Stack Overflow looked similar to this. I would be upset with every downvote or moderator action, taking everything personally.

I've realized over time that the hardest part of SE is learning to take criticism from random internet strangers (some of whom--at first--feel borderline zealous for what may seem like trivial issues--like the length of time to leave a comment up before deleting).

It's not personal, believe me, it's not. There's no one user looking at your activity and flagging/downvoting everything you do (and if there is, we have tried and true systems in place to catch and revert it).

I find it helpful to remember that underneath all of the little moderation actions and copy paste comments and downvotes and everything else, we're all here because we want to be. No one here is getting paid*. We're all part of this community because we enjoy it and because we want it to be the best it can be.

You clearly care about the site too--I've seen you popping up on posts all over, and I'm happy that you've found how much fun SE can be! But just remember that SE has a very specific style and set of guidlines (which are changing all the time and even from site to site).

My advice for you (what I've learned the hard way) is to accept the criticism for what it is--well-meaning advice from people who also care about the site. If you think you have a better idea for how we could do things or a problem with the way we work, you can take a deeper dive into the community mentality over on meta.

I dearly want you to succeed here after the effort I've seen you putting in, but as on all SE sites, it comes down to what you do when you're given advice. Best of luck JA!

*except Shog9 but he's rarely around [or around, but not visible] so he doesn't count :)

Extroverted Main Man

2:57 AM

0

Q: Is it OK to tell couple who can’t have children that they would have been wonderful parents?

Friends of mine recently wrote me that they would really have liked to have children but unfortunately can’t. I would like to express my sympathy for them. Is it OK to write in my reply to them something like “I’m really sorry. I’m sure you would have been wonderful parents.” or would that just ...

scohe001

Ahhh I mentioned him by name and he appeared! The rumors are true!

How's it going shog?

J A

3:41 AM

I don't think anyone should take any of this personal, specially binary interactions like downvotes, life is much larger than a Q&A site.

At the beginning I did find offensive the outspoken prejudice and accusations that spurred from my first question, it was so ridiculous to read someone well established on the site say "I know your kind of" and to notice other user mods joining this person in their attacks, but the individual in question seems to have adjusted their behavior towards me, will he act different with other newcomers? who knows.

It has also been frustrating the few obvious attempts to censor me, most of the time I see comments disappear and I don't second guess any foul play, but the concerned I raised today was, however, legitimate.

Thank you for your welcoming words @scohe001

I do appreciate it.

We should probably have taken this issue to an alternate chat room

Gonna have some dinner now, AFK.

scohe001

3:55 AM

@JA but this is what I'm trying to say--while you may interpret comments to fix your question as "attacks," that user was probably just trying to make sure that we have good questions on the site. And the same goes for "censoring" you. The community here has very strict rules about what's allowed in comments and when they'll get deleted because of how often our comments here have been abused.

No one is trying to hurt you here. While some people may be more focused on the site than on you, we're all trying to help in the ways we think are best! If you show that you can learn from your mistakes and take the advice of those on the site, I've found that users begin to focus on helping you help the site and get you better integrated into the community.

@JA Enjoy your dinner!

J A

4:24 AM

Thank you, it was just a fast bite near by. Am back.

I don't take all comments as attacks. I take attacks as attacks.

That's why I said there were few of them

And specified the type of comment that was in fact an attack, containing a phrase in the lines of "I know your type" and another from a different person that said "You don't even love your girlfriend blablabla"

Regardless of that

Proactively flagging my normal comments to get them erased within seconds, is indeed, bullying and censorship.

Sorry, he actually said something more similar to "I bet you hate her"

I have no problem ignoring those comments when they come from standard anons.

user15026

What are your "normal comments"?

user15026

Also, as people keep explaining, this site in particular has a really strict comment policy for some really good reasons

J A

Comments very similar to any other comment by any other chap

That policy didn't seem to apply to some well established members

Catija

We can only delete comments we see flagged... so if you see stuff that you think doesn't belong, flag it.

user15026

It might be because of their content, I can't say for sure (and no one else can really help you either) if you don't help us

J A

4:32 AM

At least that's what the behavior I observed made evident

user15026

I really don't think anyone here has any sort of vendetta against you

Catija

I mean... we can see them but we're unlikely to delete them because we don't go looking for them.

J A

Saying "vendetta" is a way to extrapolate my observation to make it sound ridiculous

user15026

and it kinda disappoints me that you keep insinuating that the diamond mods who have been selected by SE because they're good people who are trusted to be impartial etc have some sort of....thing ahainst you

user15026

A lot of comments get deleted here, especially if they're "thank you" or other sorts of things because they're not actively clarifiying anything on an answer/question

J A

4:34 AM

Make no mistake, people get grudges and act on them, that's the reason for a bunch of automated moderation tools to exists since the web was invented

I'm not imagining things, I simply raised a concern

user15026

@JA Honestly, I can pretty much guarantee that's not happening here.

user15026

@JA Right, and a number of people are trying to explain to you why that concern isn't really something that needs worrying over, because you are somewhat misinterpreting how things work

J A

And analyzing cases like mine is what helps researches find new patterns to further develop those tools.

user15026

@JA But...there's not really a case here.

J A

That's your opinion

And that's ok

user15026

4:36 AM

Is there some way I can help you understand how comments are generally handled that will help put those fears to rest?

user15026

You know you have the ability to flag any comments here if you think they don't belong, right?

J A

I find it curious that you introduce a concept that has not been touched at all, fear.

Catija

OK, so here's what happened and there's no weirdness involved... there's a filter for flags that catches certain keywords and ends up making it so that only one flag is needed for the comment to be removed... Your comment contained one of those words. But, either way, repeatedly posting the identical comment when it's being flagged and removed is not acceptable behavior. If you have any questions about things, ask on meta.

J A

Thank you for the clarification Catija

user15026

@JA It's 12:38 am, maybe I'm not using all my words correctly. You have a concern/fear/whatever, I'm trying to help you out to understand how this site operates, thats all :)

J A

4:39 AM

It confirms my suspicion about a single rogue user with mod privileges, sort of.

Catija

Nope.

J A

Any user?

scohe001

@JA I was one of the users who flagged (one iteration) of the comment that you brought up earlier so I can give you my perspective at least--I flagged it because it didn't add to your answer or the question and so it was in the wrong place on the site. After that, it was probably repeatedly deleted because of your repeated posting, as Catija says.

Catija

At least two users participated in flagging that... and anyone with 15 rep can flag something.

J A

This keyword filter allows any user to erase a comment with a single flag?

Catija

4:40 AM

Yes. But only if one of those keywords is in the comment.

J A

I see, a design flaw.

A very persistent user, I must say. hahaha

user15026

@JA It's intentionally designed that way to minimize unnecessary noise, because comments are meant to clarify questions or answers

Catija

That's an issue to discuss on Meta SE.

user15026

If you're leaving comments that aren't doing that, then you might want to reconsider the sorts of things you're leaving as comments.

J A

Well, I already saw what happens when you try to discuss the sacred site design on meta, no thank you.

But I think no further comment is needed.

user15026

4:42 AM

Here are your options then - Meta, or the Contact link in the site footer if you want someone higher up to take a look into it potentially.

Catija

OK, now that we're all done with this, I'm going to bed.

user15026

Bed sounds lovely. :)

J A

Rest well Catija and thank you for your patience

J A

4:57 AM

Oh and to be clear, I never put diamond moderators under suspicion glass.

Read the whole conversation if you disagree, that would be boring though.

That was an answer to @Ash

-9

Q: Would stretching some privilege milestones reflect closer congruence with the learning curve and would that help moderation work?

This is not a complain about a single editing of a single post. As an example: Isn't the privilege to 'Edit Questions And Answers' with immediate results a little too easy to get at 1,000 rep? I believe it to be on par with the 'Protecting questions' privilege in terms of responsibility and impa...

discussion feature-request

Post linked because relevant. Still not questioning diamond mods.

Also the cause of my discouragement to examine the site's design.

I'm over 1k rep now like I predicted btw, guess I'm now allowed to be evil.

just kidding!

It's time for me to ninja disappear.

I'm glad I approach you all with this, thank you for your support.

nighty nights

Extroverted Main Man

6:20 AM

0

Q: How to politely tell my friend that she needs psychology help?

Me and an old friend had a meeting yesterday (it's been a year since I saw her) and it turns out that when I saw her, I did not recognize her, she was completely changed in appearance, her clothes were old, ugly, and not feminine, her hair was very careless and had a masculine 'Jewish' style (eve...

conversations friends awkward-situations politeness how-to-help

SmokeDetector

6:45 AM

[ SmokeDetector | MS ] Offensive answer detected, potentially bad keyword in answer: How to communicate to a new coworker that I am not comfortable being touched? by Davide on interpersonal.SE (@Tinkeringbell)

IPS Comment Bot

8:36 AM

I couldn't disagree more with this answer if I tried. If someone is immature in this scenario it's the mother. I'd suspect that her intent isn't visiting relatives, but keeping control over daughter and boyfriend. I had a similar first holiday with my now wife, and there's no way in hell her mother would have been on that trip. — gnasher729 27 secs ago

#14672 gnasher729 (2576 rep) | A: How can I deny a request from the mother of my girlfriend to tag along on our road trip? (score: 2) | posted 23 hours ago by Fredgbh (47 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["chatty"]

Extroverted Main Man

9:49 AM

0

Q: How to change a husband?

My husband is absolutely not romantic. And absolutely do not like noisy companies, guests. The journey from adventure turns into a mission that he needs to fulfill. How can he change his attitude towards recreation? Or is it no longer a change?

family

user15026

10:36 AM

@JA awesome :) nicely done.

Tinkeringbell

11:04 AM

@JA Congratudolences! Now you're expected to get stuff right the first time :P If you ever have any questions on how to use your privileges, feel free to drop into here again, this site is a bit different than other SE sites, due to Interpersonal Skills being more subjective. Here's an old, but still very valid, good start: stackoverflow.blog/2010/09/29/good-subjective-bad-subjective

FreezePhoenix

3:28 PM

Hey.

user15026

@Tinkeringbell Congratudolences....I like that, it's a good portmanteau sort of word.

SQB

4:02 PM

@ExtrovertedMainMan that's called divorce.

FreezePhoenix

@Zoe Hey.

Tinkeringbell

4:36 PM

@Ash I stole that from someone :P Can't remember who :)

user15026

@Tinkeringbell I like it, I just might steal it myself!

Tinkeringbell

@Ash Feel free to :) Just make sure you credit the original poster (whoever that was :P)

ArtOfCode

pretty sure it was TL

Tinkeringbell

I dunno... Really? Ooops! :)

Extroverted Main Man

0

Q: Having children naturrally or through adoption

I am starting to fear I will never be able to have children on my own. I don't really feel like adopting is for me or my husband. Does this preference to have biological children make us unfit to be parents anyway? Or more generally, bad people? How can we tell people to stop suggesting adopt...

family children

Tinkeringbell

4:44 PM

@ArtOfCode chat.stackexchange.com/transcript/61165?m=44087852#44087852 It wasn't... Pfew!

ArtOfCode

@Tinkeringbell Ah :)

Tinkeringbell

@ExtrovertedMainMan That's a whole lotta details missing :(

J A

5:00 PM

@Tinkeringbell I appreciank you. tehehe, wordsmithing is awesome.

@Ash my pleasure.

IPS Comment Bot

I suspect this answer is being downvoted because it doesn't address the question, rather offers advice for the aforementioned couple. Consider editing. — J A 47 secs ago

#14716 J A (1211 rep) | A: How can I convey my sympathy to friends who have recently told me they can't have children while avoiding hurting them? (score: -3) | posted 7 hours ago by Alba Rissi (1 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["chatty"]

user5389107

Hello

Tinkeringbell

Good evening :)

@JA It sure can be :D

Extroverted Main Man

5:18 PM

0

Q: Telling mother about miscarriage

I am the oldest child in a family of three kids. When I was a young teen, my mother announced her fourth pregnancy and I reacted badly, by crying all evening. I do not remember why this news made me so sad. My mother miscarried a few weeks later and I felt guilty about it but I did not say anyth...

family southern-europe

FreezePhoenix

5:32 PM

Hey people. Long time no see... (Excluding Ash and Zoe)

doppelgreener

7:19 PM

o/

Tinkeringbell

\o

Mithrandir24601

o/

M.A.R. ಠ_ಠ

_o/

@FreezePhoenix the correct term is "folks"

Shog-approved

Tinkeringbell

What's up everyone?

ArtOfCode

the sky

Tinkeringbell

7:25 PM

How's everyone's weekend going?

M.A.R. ಠ_ಠ

It's not weekend here

Iran's weekend is Friday

Tinkeringbell

Okay.. I give up.

M.A.R. ಠ_ಠ

@ArtOfCode I disagree

Tinkeringbell

Talk about whatever y'all wanna talk about...

user15026

@Tinkeringbell In an hour and a half I am on vacation for a week and work has been pretty decently quiet so so far so good :P

M.A.R. ಠ_ಠ

7:28 PM

@Tinkeringbell well, I wanna talk about meta.SE pulp fiction but this chat prefers to be strictly Interpersonal

So I can't be the conversation starter

Tinkeringbell

@Ash Nice! May I be nosy and ask where you're off to?

@M.A.R.ಠ_ಠ Weekend is only 1 day?

user15026

@Tinkeringbell Just sticking around home but my husband is arriving for a week's visit as of tonight so I am excited about that

doppelgreener

@Tinkeringbell Going well! o/ I went out and did some shopping today, grabbed the UK Cards against Humanity as well as a couple of books.

Tinkeringbell

@Ash Yay! Have fun you two!

user15026

I am sure we will

Tinkeringbell

7:32 PM

@doppelgreener ooh! Books :D which ones?

M.A.R. ಠ_ಠ

@Tinkeringbell yep

Tinkeringbell

@M.A.R.ಠ_ಠ :( I find 2 too little already ;)

M.A.R. ಠ_ಠ

languagelog.ldc.upenn.edu/nll/?p=33707

@Tinkeringbell I personally prefer 6

Tinkeringbell

@M.A.R.ಠ_ಠ If only that'd be possible :)

doppelgreener

@Tinkeringbell NK Jemisin's The Fifth Season, and Nnedi Okorafor's Binti

FreezePhoenix

8:02 PM

@M.A.R.ಠ_ಠ Nice to see you too :P

Tinkeringbell

I googled that ;) both sound interesting :)

IPS Comment Bot

9:03 PM

@AndreaLazzarotto Actually "faithful" doesn't really mean monogamous. merriam-webster.com/dictionary/faithful more that you're trusting and agreeing to an arrangement. The word doesn't have any bearing on what sort of arrangement that is. — apaul 1 min ago

#14545 apaul (34170 rep) | A: How to introduce metamours without causing awkwardness? (score: 47) | posted 3 days ago by William Lio (435 rep) | edited 2 days ago by William Lio (435 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["chatty"]

J A

9:35 PM

@Tinkeringbell Good subjective, bad subjective was a good reading, btw

the blog post you recommended me

Tinkeringbell

@JA Yeah, I like that one :) You made a great edit on that remark about appearance question btw :) Sadly, I'm afraid the asker won't return to add more details :(

Mithrandir24601

@doppelgreener Ooh, the Fifth season's supposed to be good. Never heard of Binti before though... I just got Ann Leckie's Provenance and Ursula K Le Guin's Earthsea yesterday :) Will start one in a few minutes :)

Tinkeringbell

And here I am... Reading boring old Sherlock Holmes ;)

Sid

@Tinkeringbell Did you just say "Boring" Sherlock Holmes???

Mithrandir24601

@Tinkeringbell Finished them not too long ago actually :)

M.A.R. ಠ_ಠ

9:49 PM

@Tinkeringbell just watch the Robert Downey Jr. movies.

He's electrifying

Mithrandir24601

@Sid When you try and read through the complete collection in one go... It's rather long...

Sid

@Mithrandir24601 I'm, yeah. Never tried to do that. I would take my time

Tinkeringbell

10:13 PM

@Sid Yeah... Compared to all the SciFi :P

@M.A.R.ಠ_ಠ I dunno... There's something about that guy that doesn't seem right :P

J A

10:50 PM

@Tinkeringbell Yeah thanks, I think any of us can sometimes need help on how to express what we're trying to ask. Too bad some people do the "hit-and-run" thing on questions. Although the necromancer thing does happen.

I barely started to catch up with the last years of cinema, had been way too busy, in my head at least. There was a book "manuscript" by a friend sitting among my things for 8 years, have so many observations but it's a tad late haha. This week I watched superhero movies from 2012 and 2013 lol. Today I'm reading another book by a different friend and battling my openstack server. Weekend, so far so good, slept a lot, finally.

ArtOfCode

:O there's a new series of Ambulance

I know what I'm spending the next week watching

Tinkeringbell

@ArtOfCode Is it related to ambulances and ER? Or about something entirely different?

ArtOfCode

Right in one

It's just really well put together

J A

Sherlock's movies are cool, Guy Ritchie is always entertaining.

Tinkeringbell

@JA Well, people leave comments and I'm pretty sure they're waiting for replies and good at helping when they get them ;). Fact is, if something is lacking details like this question does, an edit won't do much good. I prefer editing to be on topic before something is on-hold, and then if necessary putting it on-hold for lack of detail ;)

If something is put on hold and edited, it goes to the reopen queue... But only on the first edit after is was put on hold.. so for off-topic questions that also lack some details...

I prefer comments ;)

@ArtOfCode I'll try and see if I can find it ;) I watched a lot of ER and House when I was younger ;)

ArtOfCode

11:04 PM

Ambulance : Series 3 Episode 2 : Contains some upsetting scenes

►

2

J A

I guess that makes sense, editing is more helpful when the person asking is engaged. Otherwise, we're doing almost pointless heavy lifting

Tinkeringbell

@JA Right :) although a (small) edit on a question that's still open can encourage that engagement ;)

Mithrandir24601

@ArtOfCode This looks fascinating

ArtOfCode

(disclaimer: tissues may be required)

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir24601 Yeah, I guess I know what I'm doing tomorrow and the day after :)

@ArtOfCode haha... That upsetting?

ArtOfCode

11:06 PM

but seriously UK paramedics are incredible

@Tinkeringbell depends how cold-hearted you are ;)

Tinkeringbell

@ArtOfCode I think TLC has a series... 24 hours in A and E? I liked that too

@ArtOfCode when it comes to hospital stuff, pretty cold-hearted...

Mithrandir24601

@Tinkeringbell I thought I knew what I was supposed to be doing today and will be doing tomorrow... Then everyone was like "no, exams" and nothing's happening. Plan B was/is to read, so... I'll maybe put this on in the 'background' :P

ArtOfCode

@Tinkeringbell Aye, didn't see as much of that

@Tinkeringbell yeah... being a paramedic kinda has me desensitized to stuff, but it's still fascinating seeing it all in action again

Tinkeringbell

@ArtOfCode I dunno, I can stand almost nothing in real life, but on TV it's just TV...

Mithrandir24601

@ArtOfCode Oooh, Surgeons: At the edge of life and death was the best thing I've watched since Planet Earth II

Surgeons: At the Edge of Life : Episode 1 of 3 : The Longest Day

►

ArtOfCode

11:09 PM

might have to be the next bunch I watch...

I'm slowly cycling through all of this Feenix guy's videos

Tinkeringbell

I just started catching up on horror movies on Netflix, but the next suggestions are all in weird languages like Korean or Russian or Spanish

Guess Ambulance is better then ;)

ArtOfCode

Unless you understand Korean or Russian or Spanish to a good enough level... yeah probably :)

Tinkeringbell

I can manage enough Spanish for a game of Monopoly... But it involves a lot of guessing based on my knowledge of French ;)

It's like.. reading being easier than listening

ArtOfCode

Aye

J A

Horror films and I don't make a good cocktail, I tend to laugh on the characters' expense. Asian horror can be extreme though.

ArtOfCode

11:13 PM

I'll watch stuff in French or Spanish if it's got subtitles, but otherwise... eh

Tinkeringbell

@ArtOfCode Oh, it's all got subtitles.. but I prefer to be able to actually listen and understand, and not having to look at the screen constantly.. crochet a little in between.

J A

I've never in my life watched a French horror movie, it'd be interesting to take a dive in their folklore.

ArtOfCode

heh, multitasking

Tinkeringbell

@JA Hmm... I kinda liked the background noise level a horror movie provides :P

@ArtOfCode Exactly. Having to translate just doesn't work ;)

@JA Well, it probably contains a lot of French ;)

Mithrandir24601

@JA Most foreign language stuff I watch is actually Chinese. I've seen a couple of French and Spanish films but not much else

J A

11:18 PM

I like practicing languages with comedy films, and reading subtitles on suspense films is ok by me. Other than that, I prefer to be able to understand what they said, like you.

Mithrandir24601

Pan's Labyrinth/El laberinto del fauno has to be one of the most exquisite thing's I've seen. Can't forget about Studio Ghibli though, which is every bit as good (actually one of the things I was planning to do tomorrow was to go and see My Neighbour Totoror in the cinema :/ )

Tinkeringbell

@JA Ohhh, that reminds me of watching a lot of Asterix And Obelix in French, in preparation for my high school exam :)

J A

Pan's Labyrinth is awesome.

Tinkeringbell

I missed something again. Never heard of that ;)

J A

spaniard fantasy (realismo mágico?) thriller film by mexican director Guillermo del Toro, set around the time of Franco's brutal regime, very much recommended

Mithrandir24601

11:23 PM

@Tinkeringbell Watch it. It's utterly superb. Maybe not quite as good as Spirited Away, but still right up there

Tinkeringbell

I'll get onto it, sometime. I wish my parents had done a better job when it came to diversity regarding books and movies sometimes ;)

Mithrandir24601

@Tinkeringbell Yeah, same - I get most of my suggestions from friends and my PhD supervisor :P

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir24601 Well, mine weren't really bad on the suggestion side, just on the 'that's forbidden' side ;)

I only read Harry Potter when I was 20, 2 years into University and living on myself and suddenly realising I could do that now ;)

Mithrandir24601

And Pan's Labyrinth would definitely be in the top 20 films I've seen so far. I've still got a lot more films to watch yet though :)

Tinkeringbell

I think the best movie I ever saw was a documentary called Emma wil leven. It's about a girl with anorexia that films herself trying to recover. Sadly, she doesn't make it

Mithrandir24601

11:27 PM

@Tinkeringbell Oh dear... My parent's weren't anywhere near that strict. They forbade me from reading 'too much' (i.e. when they were getting annoyed that I was reading at dinner time) but I was allowed to read whatever I wanted :)

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir24601 oh, reading too much was definitely a worry too :P my mom once sent me to go play outside. I snatched a book, climbed a tree and started reading. I was lost for about an hour and a half because I was so engrossed that I didn't hear them calling me

Mithrandir24601

@Tinkeringbell That's so sad :(

@Tinkeringbell Haha! Definitely sounds like something I would do :P

J A

@Tinkeringbell That's a cool story. I always wanted a tree house, so I'll build myself one ^.^

Tinkeringbell

What I remember best though, is that when I was around 7, we went on a vacation. I got to bring books from the library, and when I finished them I started on Mom's pretty explicit romance novel. I finished about the pages before mom stormed in and asked me why I was reading that :P

@JA I didn't need a treehouse, this particular tree was very climbable and had this nice three branch fork near it crown, where you could sit between two and lean against the third :)

@Mithrandir24601 It is, but it's so well made! At least it got me to understand anorexia a bit better..

(which was pretty useful in real life later)

Mithrandir24601

@Tinkeringbell My mum may have (presumably unaware) bought me a book with a couple of very explicit scenes in it before I was a teen. That was a bit of an eye opener indeed

Tinkeringbell

11:34 PM

@Mithrandir24601 My mom has a knack for losing kids XD

J A

haha, the time I caught mom with something kinky while looking for something else in the closet I was like "why do you confiscate my playboy magazines then?" and she just said "that's not mine" and I was like "sure..., let's talk about something else"

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir24601 My mom would never do that unawares ;)

@JA Ah eewl!

FreezePhoenix

Trees. Sadness. Life. Explicitness. Freinds. Loss. Love. => Life.

Tinkeringbell

@FreezePhoenix very inspiring :) is that from a book?

@JA I once encountered my mom and dad in the middle of the night both on their way to the bathroom. That's still more info than I can handle :P

J A

well she's only human

FreezePhoenix

11:36 PM

No. It seems like it should though...

Tinkeringbell

@JA Oh sure, but I like to see only the superhuman side of my parents XD

Mithrandir24601

@Tinkeringbell Most of the time, when reading any sort of romance (etc.) in any book, I just go "oh not again, can't the author just skip this?" unless it's written really well (which is... rare). This particular scene was... So far out there that it was completely unexpected in a "what did I just read?" sense that still sticks with me many years later

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir24601 :P

J A

hahahaha, that's a cool way to put it

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir24601 That's probably why I'm reading Sherlock Holmes right now :P

Mithrandir24601

11:40 PM

@Tinkeringbell That's one thing Sherlock is very good for :)

Tinkeringbell

I've got monuments men lined up for when I'm done with Sherlock Holmes

And after that it's probably time to reread Lovecraft :)

J A

all my male siblings and I have seen dad naked coming out from the shower like it's nothing, I don't think anyone felt too awkward, just different culture I guess

Mithrandir24601

@Tinkeringbell is sick

Tinkeringbell

@JA very different... My dad asks me to close my bedroom door if he goes to have a shower and it's open... I was raised pretty strictly Christian

@Mithrandir24601 Yeah, that was my reaction too... I mean, I know how I came to be on this Earth but that was strange and awkward

J A

we're a weird mix of catholic and stone masons, with jewish influence too

Mithrandir24601

11:43 PM

@JA That's one thing and seems reasonably fine... But, well...

Tinkeringbell

Let's just go back to discussing books and movies :P

J A

for sure

Mithrandir24601

@Tinkeringbell I still haven't got round to starting Provenance yet

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir24601 What's that about?

J A

oh, some of my close relatives turned Christian too

it's potpourri over here

I recently realized some of the books I bought and are waiting for me since years ago are editions considered, like, low quality

Mithrandir24601

11:47 PM

@Tinkeringbell Umm... Don't know yet :P It's by the same author (and set in the same Universe) as the Imperial Radch trilogy, which was a space opera from the point of view of an AI, with a wonderful way of looking at gender

J A

I'll probably read them any way, and then I'll set them free on public spaces

Many of my friends are of the opinion that Penguin is one of the best editorials around, I bought a couple of those, but I'll have to read a different edition to compare or understand why they are better, I guess?

Tinkeringbell

@Mithrandir24601 Hmm... Sounds a little too spacey for me

@JA I have some Penguin books. I like them :)

J A

@Mithrandir24601 would you mind providing a link on the book you're talking about?

Mithrandir24601

@JA This one? - on Amazon

J A

sweet, seems popular, murder and angry aliens, oh, so much to read, I wonder if anyone has bought a film producing license

it was nice talking with you guys

Mithrandir24601

11:58 PM