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1:12 AM
Q: How to filter all questions?

BlackI try to filter all questions to find out which question has the most votes. At the moment you can only filter for active, hot, week and month. It would be really cool if there would be another button e.g. "alltime" or "all".

2 hours later…
3:05 AM
User Number 10,000! Which DOESN'T mean we have 10,000 users. But we are getting there soon.
The next milestone is at User Number 100,000. :)
Making fake accounts? How are we supposed to increase our user numbers when we're already users?
Promote this site!
@Catija Dude no.
I don't know just wait users WILL come! legit ones.
Q: Santa Claus - How should we respond to those who assume we're doing "Santa Claus" with our kids?

Austin TMy wife and I have small children who are finally old enough to realize that December is a special time of year. For a myriad of reasons my wife and I have decided we won't present "Santa Claus" to our children in the traditional, American sense. We will tell them about the legend, but when it co...

1 hour later…
4:36 AM
Q: My friend doesn't realise he's fallen for a multi-level marketing scheme. How can I help?

PhillA friend of mine (originally my personal trainer, I don't see him any more, but we keep in contact) is caught up in a MLM scheme. This is a well known scheme and there is a lot of info out there about why it is bad, and the vast majority of people who get involved will either make nothing, or los...

5:20 AM
Q: Workplace Favoritism

Meg SteinheilI have a bit of a complicated & delicate work problem — it seems silly but I'm well beyond embarrassment or shame in admitting that I'm desperate for a solution. I work for a tiny boutique consulting firm (small business owned by 2 people). Everyone has a PhD except me, I have a bachelors degree...

Q: How do I tell my parents I don't want to take sides in their disputes?

Natasha F StewartI'm a young adult, and both of my parents come to me when they want to complain about the other. (They are married, but their relationship hasn't been on good terms for a couple of years.) I don't want to take sides or talk badly about either one behind their backs. How can I explain this without...

6:03 AM
Good morning!
@AJ Hello stranger!
6:20 AM
@NogShine Hola
7:11 AM
Q: How to face strangers who look into our phones while we are travelling in a transit?

Nog ShineThis is a problem which I face while I travel in public transportation. I have a habit of checking my messages, call data or Stack Exchange stuff I missed and other social media stuff while I'm travelling in a public transit. When I'm doing that, I notice that one of the passengers who are sitt...

Q: How best to address a former teacher

kanderson8I'm a 22-year-old college student soon to be entering my final semester of my undergraduate degree. For the second time this semester (and for entirely unrelated occasions), I've been contacted by former teachers via e-mail. Both of these teachers are figures from my elementary school, which runs...

7:29 AM
Pfft... the low quality post queue blew up overnight! :P That's good :D
2 days ago, by Tinkeringbell
@NogShine So, any reason you decided to come here? Any good questions you can ask?
@Tinkeringbell I asked one .
@NogShine What where? :P
Found it... don't change your profile pic, it makes you hard to track! :P
I asked a question. Not sure it's a good one.
I have site specific profile pics
@NogShine I think it's a perfect one :)
@Tinkeringbell For the sake of convenience, It is Kenny "Immortal" McCormick on IPS too.
7:41 AM
@NogShine I was looking for a weird orange avatar, the one at your question is purple... I almost didn't find it! :P
(And I was just teasing ;) )
Can someone please review this edit:
Q: How do deal with my manager refusing to hold a conversation with me?

Meg SteinheilI have a bit of a complicated & delicate work problem — it seems silly but I'm well beyond embarrassment or shame in admitting that I'm desperate for a solution. My workplace I work for a tiny boutique consulting firm (small business owned by 2 people). Everyone has a PhD except me, I have a ba...

Just a sec, I'm writing an answer....
7:59 AM
@NogShine Sir, you have an answer :P
Thanks Ma'am I'm reading it. :)
@ExtrovertedMainMan this is a very common problem but I'm not sure if it's actually on topic
I'd love to see an answer to that question, BTW.
@JarkoDubbeldam Looks good, did you cut out any examples, like Catija asked in the comments?
@Mithrandir How can I explain X to my friend seems pretty on-topic to me? What makes you think it's not? (Weird, usually I'm the 'this doesn't belong here' person)
@Mithrandir It is pretty much already handled here:
Q: What warnings would you tell a friend about to enter a multi-level marketing (MLM) business venture?

Chris W. ReaImagine you had a friend who was about to join a multi-level marketing (MLM) business, despite your advice to the contrary. Another friend or family member had already convinced them the opportunity is a worthwhile business venture, and you couldn't change their mind. Given that, what additional...

@Tinkeringbell A few small examples. I left the big ones in. I mostly focused on structuring so it isn't a wall of text
@JarkoDubbeldam Good :D ... (Revision history won't load here, so I couldn't really check)...
8:09 AM
(psst: essential oils MLM is very popular here, unfortunately)
and here:
Q: Friend was brainwashed by MLM-/ponzi investment scam. What can I do?

H. IddenRecently a friend of mine invited me to hear about “an interesting chance to simply earn money.” Basically we and other invited people drove to a meeting room where a speaker told us about a growing startup where you could invest money in a field where similar investments had an ROI of apparently...

@Tinkeringbell the way it's written is tickling me but I can't look very closely at the moment
The question already has very good answers on another stack. Now that isn't a reason to close it, but it makes it a bit pointless.
@NogShine you might make HNQ today I think ;)
@Mithrandir Hmm... I think I see it... 'how can I help' in the title is sorta different from the body..
@JarkoDubbeldam Well, we could focus a bit on the underlying IPS principles of having such a talk in the best way possible?
> After reading the comments posted in this thread, I do want to amend my statements, because many good points have been raised here. You obviously can't just sit by and do nothing while your friend talks others into taking the same (or worse) risks that he is. That's not morally right by any measure

At the same time however, be VERY careful about how you go about this. Your friend, as you stated, sounds pretty much like he's all in with this scheme, so there's definitely going to be some serious emotional commitment to it on his part as well. Anyone and everything that threatens what he s
Ohwell, I might try and write up something when I get out of a meeting
9:03 AM
Q: Deletion: 'How to explain tactfully that someone has misrepresented you?'

Canada - Area 51 ProposalWhy was https://interpersonal.stackexchange.com/q/4129/2423 deleted? The 2 upvoted answers (that I again was too late to accept) can help others.

9:16 AM
this seems like VLQ to me
A: How to respond to an unfalsifiable accusation?

Stig HemmerDon't feed the trolls. The best response to an unfounded accusation is no response. Ignore them.

@Mithrandir Definitely.
and this seems like NaA
A: How to face strangers who look into our phones while we are travelling in a transit?

fukiburiYou could try one of those privacy protection screens. They reduce the angle from which the display is visible. Someone looking from behind you over your shoulder will still be able to read, but people from the next seat probably not anymore. They were originally made for laptop screens, but the...

@IntrovertedMetaMan. And I think this question is VLQ too... but I can't flag it :P
This page is good to scan every now and then.
@Mithrandir I think I'm going to protect that post...
9:26 AM
@Mithrandir Not sure it is NaA but it is VLQ
The answers here aren't really focused on how: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/q/7773/1599
@NogShine Oh, everything that's not an IPS solution but a lifehack is NAA here ;)
Nice and strict :P
Q: How to notifiy cleaning personal that they've "missed a spot"

infinitezeroI think it's ill-mannered to tell someone that is cleaning for you to do a better job, however, how can I tell them, that they probably missed a spot without offending them? For clarification: I'm a student in university with my own office, so the cleaning personal is not paid by me personally.

@Mithrandir Cool, that's better than seeing every edit/question ;)
9:50 AM
gaaaah why is there a 5-second wait between flagging comments
@Mithrandir Just to annoy you (and me)
just went on a flagging spree on The Workplace ;P
@Tinkeringbell that's probably r/a
@Mithrandir They will be forever in your debt :P
@Mithrandir Yeah on second thought I don't know why I even asked.
9:56 AM
A: How do I respond to someone saying yes to "Would anyone like the last [Item]?"?

IamNotListening How do I respond to someone saying yes to “Would anyone like the last [Insert Item Here]? How about these three options: "Nope, it's all yours." "I'll take it please." "How about we split it?" Three simple but direct answers you could give to that question, depending on your preference...

the first half of the answer is an answer to a different question entirely. i'm not sure if i should edit it out. or what?
@Mithrandir that's not a probably
yeah, I flagged it
its nuked
@Mithrandir the frustration.. gah!
i wish there was a way to mark multiple comments before flagging them.
Okay, I have seriously just run into this 4 times in the past 10 seconds
sorry @Tinkeringbell, but I just flagged this comment...
I love the 'someone special'. That's genius! +1 — Tinkeringbell Nov 2 at 15:04
even if it's got 100+ upvotes, it's still a useless comment
10:24 AM
@Mithrandir Did I do that? :O I must have been drunk
I kept my honour and deleted it myself :)
Missed a flag 😭
@NogShine Huh? Why?
@Tinkeringbell I should have flagged your comment before you deleted.
@NogShine Hahaha :) Oh sorry, next time I'll make sure to ask ;)
Don't take that seriously.
10:27 AM
@NogShine Didn't ;)
Don't take that seriously either ;)
11:11 AM
Q: How to ask colleagues to borrow their scissors without being confrontational

AbbersIn an office of 17 we only have one pair of scissors and when I need to use them I ask the last person I saw with them. However they looked really stunned and shocked like I am accusing them if they do not have it. How do i ask without sounding confrontational?

@Mithrandir I beat you to it, first one is mine ;)
Interesting experiment on the location tags btw... I'm in, let's see where it goes...
Yeah, let's see if anyone else comes on board.
11:50 AM
@Tinkeringbell ?
@JarkoDubbeldam Closing questions because they lack location/cultural info ;)
We talked about that in chat yesterday evening
11:55 AM
@Mithrandir I even think NAA more than VLQ, but I must admit VLQ flags have a 'higher success rate here'
Do they end up in different queues?
Because I ony see LQP queue. Do NAA flags end up there?
@JarkoDubbeldam No in the same queue, but I think you can see which are flagged NAA and VLQ?
They all look the same
Flagged because of length and content
@Tinkeringbell Nope, they appear the same in the queue
@Mithrandir Oh... then we're just having a good day today :P
I really thought sometimes things were dismissed because 'I flagged them wrong' as in I used NAA while it was VLQ
11:58 AM
Sometimes I review things as looks OK, when I'd just downvote them without rightout deleting
Mods see them differently, though, so yes, that could happen.
Hmm, maybe these should go to another room, but I can't set one up at the moment
NAA? interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/7796/1599 isn't on how to respond to a 'yes'... but on how to phrase the question so that it will allow a yes?
@Mithrandir Huh?
rip, it seems my question is stalling at 7k views :/
@JarkoDubbeldam That's actually a pretty solid number :D
It did well, it fought valiantly ;)
12:06 PM
But muh badges
should've made the title more clickbaity
A snorer wants to sleep in my dorm room? Click here to find out what happens next!
@JarkoDubbeldam Hahaha ;) Shog said you're not allowed to! :P
@JarkoDubbeldam Yeah, that's actually annoying, that there's such a leap between the silver and gold one...
I dumped a load of posts in LQP.... you might wanna take a look before it start glowing red again ;)
well, at least I'm inching closer to fanatic
@JarkoDubbeldam How long to go?
I'm at 60
It's red, but I can't review anything
@JarkoDubbeldam Cool :) I got mine at the start of this week :)
@JarkoDubbeldam What, NOOO! You're supposed to be my back-up ;)
12:11 PM
@Tinkeringbell I'll need some rep first :|
Nice, now I'll probably get a bunch of disputed flags...
@Mithrandir Huh? I thought you'd have plenty..
A: How do I respond to someone saying yes to "Would anyone like the last [Item]?"?

IsselI think adding the part "I'm going to eat it unless..." is a bit...not rude exactly, but not completely honest, I think it's a signal that they want to appear polite, but really say, "don't speak up I want it". I feel like you should ask a genuine question "Did everyone get one? Anyone want the...

this one does have a hint of an answer :/
> In this case, if I hadn't had one yet, or was super hungry cause I missed breakfast, I might ask to split it with them, and add on that you hadn't had one or missed breakfast, those are pretty good reasons most people would understand.
@JarkoDubbeldam I read that as 'another way how to ask'.... as in 'would anyone like to share last item' ?
Not as a reaction when someone already said yes, and then ask 'can we please share'..
@Tinkeringbell I've got 806 rep on Interpersonal.SE.
12:16 PM
@Mithrandir Work on it... :P Gather some gossip and ask a juicy question ;)
Y'all are blowing up my inbox with comments again, but no one is suggesting improvements or asking for clarification. We have chatrooms if you want to be chatty! — Tinkeringbell 11 secs ago
If anyone wants to flag stuff..
Feel free :D
Hmm - is interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/7788/31 actually in an interpersonal solution?
I'm still innerly debating that one ;)
flagged the entire thread
At least, I'm not seeing a skill explained there, no How..
is an answer, no explanation though
IMO, if they add a justification why this would work, it'd pass
12:24 PM
@Tinkeringbell oh, I could ask some juicy questions, but I won't
@Mithrandir Okay, then let me rephrase that: Can you ask a good question?
Is it allowed to involve juices?
...I probably could, but I won't ask a question just to get rep
You would be asking so you'll be better able to help us... That's a good thing :) The question itself would already help, a good question is a good thing to happen to a beta site ;)

But on the other hand you could of course argue you should be seriously looking for an answer...
Hey... Maintenance.
Time to get some work done!
Not honoring the premise of the question, and not offering the 'don't' as part of a valid answer? interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/7797/1599 ... btw, I already mentioned 'don't do privacy sensitive stuff in a public space' as part of my answer, although I advised not to mention the word privacy, not to not do it at all...
12:37 PM
@Mithrandir You want to have that other room for this? I personally think we might keep this up a while, just so people can see...
@Tinkeringbell I guess keeping it here is fine for now
unless people start complaining
@Mithrandir Oh dear... I'm to old for that... Once upon a time I knew what that was supposed to mean and that I'm probably supposed to do something now right?
@Mithrandir My thoughts exactly.
nah, it's just a joke, and a way of saying 'we said this at the same time'
Out of delete votes
I have now managed to flag interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/7795/31 as both VLQ and NaA :D
the VLQ was automatically marked helpful, and no the NaA is pending
12:41 PM
Should we edit https://interpersonal.stackexchange.com/q/7727/1599 a little? Maybe add a 'when I ask' into the question title?

There's a lot of confusion going on there...

The OP describes a situation in which they aren't the asker that prompted them to ask the question.

But then asks how to respond when they *are* the asker...
Personally, I'd prefer if someone else could do that, since I'm already exchanging comments with a user and I'd prefer not to get accused of editing a question to fit my way..
| NLN | [How do I respond to someone saying yes to “Would anyone like the last [Item]?”?](interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/7727/…)
@Mithrandir I have a NAA there still..
Well, there goes our vibe.... first disputed flag on this one: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/7754/1599
@Mithrandir You're starting to look like a human smoke detector
12:52 PM
I like it ;)
it's more modeled after SOCVR
@Mithrandir Not very familiar with that, I only saw the abbreviation a few times

 SO Close Vote Reviewers

This room is for support and discussion about reviewing and co...
@Mithrandir I'll be taking a look later ;)
Out of delete votes for today, but this one isn't good either: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/7800/1599
12:56 PM
Strange really, there are very good 'bad' examples already there and still people keep writing them
This one ended up disputed as well: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/7793/1599
This one will probably end up disputed as well, people are voting it as 'looks ok' : interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/7797/1599
An unpopular opinion for sure. "All hail my (not everyone's) privacy!" is the accepted way of thinking I guess. (I've upvoted it to balance it ;) — YSC 10 mins ago
No longer needed
And please downvote the post again because it's not good but can't be deleted this way....
If someone cares to leave a comment, please do, I've written an answer there and don't want trouble
This doesn't answer the question - the OP is looking for an interpersonal solution to the problem, and telling them that 'you shouldn't do that' isn't helpful. Please make sure that all answers here actually answer the specific question that the OP asked. — Arwen Undómiel 6 secs ago
1:07 PM
Yeah, how does that work? How do I write messages like that?
[tag:flag-pls] turns into
@Mithrandir I'd also have added that the OP already said they are turning off their screens...
Like this?
Yay ;)
@Tinkeringbell done
Ugh... I'm getting in a mood from all this flagging and disputed flags and commenting and .... I'll be getting a cup of coffee ;)
:| I haven't really been voting much here.
I've cast 52 upvotes, and 152 downvotes.
i really don't like the smell of coffee :P
1:12 PM
220 up 185 down
expected more down tbh :o
274 up, 253 down
good morning
good afternoon
afternoon @Mithrandir
1:21 PM
@MisterPositive Fresh meat, fresh delete votes... on to the LQP queue you go! :P
Hi :D
@Tinkeringbell :-P
But seriously, please delete stuff, we've been busy today, I'm outta votes..
This site does get a good bit of, shall we say, interesting answers.
I don't think I have Delete powers yet
@MisterPositive Well, do a recommend deletion then please, so my flags don't end up 'disputed' :P
@Tinkeringbell Forgive me, still on cup of coffee number 1. What are you asking of me?
Oh, vote to close that question.
@MisterPositive And 'recommend deletion' for the low quality posts (or can't you see that queue either?)
Done. Up to 3
I just got here.... :-}
LQP is clear...
1:25 PM
@MisterPositive Yeah and there's work to be done, I'm already on a third cup of coffee, I've been flagging, voting and deleting stuff half the day... I'm hyper :P
Weird, I still have 5 flags pending
@Tinkeringbell Not sure I will have your level of commitment here. ;-}
@MisterPositive I'll be cheering you on :P
@Mithrandir done...
why do I feel this pressure all of the sudden....
What pressure?
1:28 PM
to flag, and review, and do, you know work....
Anything else I can do at the moment?
having been here for some time now, it is still not clear what is and is not on topic here.
i am a work in progress in that regards
and how comments are supposed to be used is also unclear
Comments are supposed to be used for suggesting improvements or asking for clarification.
@Mithrandir that is straight forward, can help there.
what is an isn't on topic is still vague to me
Or pointing out problems in a post - if it's done in a polite way - along with a couple other uses.
1:32 PM
Q: What do you do if someone is telling you something you already know about, such as a fact or something that happened?

AlesanaOne thing that has been happening lately is that people will tell me something that I already know. Naturally, I respond saying something like, "oh I heard/read about that". However, I feel like when I say that, I come off a bit snobby or like I am a know-it-all. And I also feel like their body l...

this has 38 votes....but in reality it should be closed?
According to me it should be closed. I'm only one member of the community, though.
But votes are not always indicative of high quality.
@Mithrandir I agree, and cast my vote as well
Often the HNQ will skew things.
Nope, that holds true across the stack.
So this one
Q: How to notifiy cleaning personal that they've "missed a spot"

infinitezeroI think it's ill-mannered to tell someone that is cleaning for you to do a better job, however, how can I tell them, that they probably missed a spot without offending them? For clarification: I'm a student in university with my own office, so the cleaning personal is not paid by me personally.

on or off topic?
1:36 PM
Is this a robot?
I am not, for sure...
You remind me of something.
eye color hazel, my coffee is luke warm
SOCVR, probably
1:38 PM
@Mithrandir How is it unclear or too broad ?
@Tensibai Does not provide culture information.
Okay, they've added a country tag.
How it is related anyway ?
All questions need culture information ;)
@Tensibai Smoking is very much culture related ( location if you will )
I've retracted my close vote, though, because they added the tag.
1:40 PM
I don't feel it is very much culture/location related unless you encompass europe and US in the same "location"
And the question is "How to be supportive despite disappointment" which could well be unrelated to smoking also
@Mithrandir That get's a down vote too
Wow, I'm a grouch:
@Mithrandir I missed the meta post enforcing this rule then
good morning @Catija ;)
1:46 PM
@Tensibai We've been lax about pushing for it since Hamlet left.
I'm kinda morbidly curious what the flag count is at the moment.
My 2cts: that's absolutely silly when the IPS is between 2 person
@Tensibai ?
@Mithrandir one sec.
@MisterPositive Requiring a culture tag when the question is about an inter personal problem between 2 person where the cultural surrounding is irrelevant I find it silly to require it
1:48 PM
@Tensibai really? You don't think that culture is relevant when asking something? How should I apologize for x US vs Japan, for example?
Two people of Indian nationality will naturally approach an interpersonal issue differently than two people of American nationality, or, say, two people in Iran.
Back to the case: "How can I express disappointment while still being supportive of partner quitting smoking?" <- How would culture play something there ?
The smoking culture of their location is very important, I'd say.
I'd say not for this specific one, there's far enough background detailed to not require it
@Mithrandir It is no doubt. How you would compose an answer to that question specifically would be impacted by locale.
1:51 PM
@Mithrandir 25
Q: How should a person be told to apologise when he thinks he isn't wrong?

user46208A few days ago, in a Zoology class, one of my classmates was caught reading the Zoology textbook when the teacher was explaining. Although he wasn't reading anything that he wasn't supposed to, the teacher got mad at him for not paying attention and asked him to leave the class. He openly decline...

@Catija heh. 17 of those are mine, I guess :D
And restricting it to US by tag sounds even less profitable to the OP.
@Tensibai I don't think so in this particular case.
Why would the op want answers about India or Germany if they are from the US?
@Catija Why would the op do not want answers from all over the world if they are from the US ?
1:55 PM
Yes, there may be situations where it's not as relevant. But we can't know that without knowing what their culture is.
I get what @Tensibai is saying but in some cases, like smoking or drinking for example, I think locale matters to elicit more useful answers.
I think there's cases where it is indeed mandatory, but there's cases where it is far less relevant
much easier to just require it all the time than figure it when it's relevant and when it's not
@MisterPositive In this case I disagree, the problem is not about smoking at root, it is how to be supportive to someone trying to quit smoking
@Tensibai this isn't a survey class. Having a dozen answers from different cultures doesn't tell the op what's appropriate for them if none of those cultures are their own.
1:56 PM
@Tensibai That is best part of this type of forum. Its okay to disagree. The community as a whole will decide. :-}
@MisterPositive Indeed
...except it's not exactly a forum ;)
@Catija Boom goes the dynamite.
@Mithrandir Semantics sir.
@Mithrandir Then it should be edited within How to Ask
@MisterPositive I love semantics
@Tensibai mods can't edit that page.
1:58 PM
@Tensibai Sure. The op has already stated what they want/how they feel, so what is proscribed by their culture is less important.
@Catija that's the root cause of my disagreement with a unclear/too broad closure for just a missing tag, if the question had not this detailed background I'd agree, but just a tag missing isn't a close worthy reason IMO
@Mithrandir May worth adding a to this meta then
2:17 PM
@Tensibai as far as I'm concerned, it's not about a tag. I don't think it needs to be a tag... we have a very mixed culture around the world. In some case you're Chinese in China but sometimes you're Chinese in the US and knowing both pieces of information is valuable... but that's quite difficult to explain in a tagging scheme.
It gets even muddier when the people in question are from different cultures.
A: Are questions that lack a location tag really too broad?

CatijaThis isn't something we can make a blanket statement about. Questions here tend to be very broad and limiting them by culture may help combat that. Every limiting detail makes a question (potentially) more answerable, in the Stack Exchange format. I'm actually quite happy with the answer I wrote...

"Consider stopping X" is a perfectly fine answer to "When I do X, Y happens, how do I stop Y". Especially when Y is a normal result of X. If you cannot expect Y to stop happening as a result of X, I feel that that constitutes an answer to the question. If someone asks how to stop people staring when they shout in public, the only reasonable answer is also "stop shouting". I agree the answer may not be what one wants to hear, but an uncomfortable truth is a truth nonetheless. — oerkelens 57 mins ago
I've an answer there, so I'd rather not get involved...
But can someone please point out that we have meta's discussing these things, and that they are going against everything we are trying to build here?
Like this one: interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/a/2151/1599 and this one: interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/a/2162/1599 and maybe also the one about respecting a premise?
@Tinkeringbell done
@Tensibai Thanks :) .... That question is attracting a lot of 'wrong' answers today... :/
Who would be upvoting this? interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/7801/1599 ... Ugh.
2:32 PM
Well I nearly never answer on IPS as I'm usually too slow and another one has already stated the same approach as mine
@Tensibai Yeah, that does happen to me too. I've had to discard an answer a few times as well, because I'm usually pretty verbose and often people that can write more concise beat me to it
@Catija it may be worth while to protect that one a little early.
@Tinkeringbell while at it: downvote and comment on this answer also ?
It does explain the lurker is not specially at fault, but doesn't address the IPS issue neither
@Tensibai Go ahead :) ... It was a comment underneath my answer first, so I've refrained from reacting to it ;)
It looks like we have to modes of operation here: Flags, deleting, commenting the entire day, or doing almost nothing at all :O
@TheTinyMan Have you already flagged your comments today? :P
@Tinkeringbell rubs eyes Nope, not yet. Morning, by the way! xD
2:44 PM
@TheTinyMan Good morning... ;)
Well, start with the most active question. A good way to get flags is to flag stuff :P
For example, the last 2 in this thread can go: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/7661/…
I think that I've only once actually flagged a comment
Especially for personal questions like this, it is better to use a pseudonym and a picture which is not instantly recognisable. Or do you want your parents to read this? — RedSonja 8 hours ago
GoGoGo then: comments underneath this answer aren't suggesting improvements/asking clarification either: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/7680/1599
@apaul That's 'suggesting an improvement'? ;) That's why I left it. It's actually suggesting something useful
@Tinkeringbell Suggesting that people need anonymous sock puppet accounts to post questions here is kinda messed up.
So I haven't sat down to read over the appropriate metas and faqs and stuff. I'm bad at responsibility. xD What makes an inappropriate comment? Like, some of these comments are clarifying or expanding on the answer, adding to its validity, raising questions, or suggesting tweaks to make it more effective.
2:48 PM
@apaul That's another way to look at it... I read it as gentle suggestion, not forcing her into anything, just making her think about it... but then again, that's me, and I can definitely see your interpretation now
I mean, clearly, "rude or abusive" speaks for itself and I'm always happy to help weed out comments like that
@TheTinyMan Generally speaking it's better to write a competing answer than to try to get people to change theirs.
Anything that's only commenting on part of the answer isn't good here. It will lead to threads discussing the answer, which we don't want...

A comment asking for further clarification or suggesting an improvement would look something like this: https://interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/a/2147/1599
And then we just decided in meta that feedback from the OP themselves (I tried this, did work/didn't work) is valuable, so we leave that.
Rest can go :)
Yeah, and make sure to explain what parts of an existing answer you disagree with, and why/how things will go wrong...

Don't go... that answer is wrong. Do this instead.
Okay. "Comments should ask for clarification" is a phrase I see here. Is that what defines a good comment? Well, that, and explaining how a question or answer doesn't fit guidelines.
As opposed to some of these, "this answer is good, and here's a way to implement it" or "this answer is good, here's my personal experience to add to the answer's?" Which is what I read in the two that you suggest that I flag.
(in the last one you linked to, @Tinkeringbell )
Those two examples are borderline. adding information that can be added to the answer to make it more clear is good
just adding 'yeah I did this, it's good' is pointless
2:54 PM
Okay. Thanks for the clarification, @JarkoDubbeldam :-)
And the advice, @Tinkeringbell
The comment should contain information that can be used to improve the post above it
This is interesting:
@PieterB So anything most people do in the privacy of their own home, their own bedroom or their own bathroom, you would without hesitation perform in public (and if so, would you expect others to ignore it?) Of course you can do private things in public - but by what right would you demand people to respect your privacy if you choose to do such things in public? — oerkelens 8 mins ago
Either through providing additional information, or by asking the author for clarification
^I always thought the question was about 'asking' people to respect your privacy, not 'demanding' and 'enforcing' ?
@JarkoDubbeldam I think I got it, so comments aren't really expected to add value in and of themselves.
@JarkoDubbeldam But should be used to inform edits to the question or answer
2:56 PM
@TheTinyMan take a look at this:
It will do no more than start a discussion about whether it is dogmatic or not
Or not, it just got deleted :)
@Tinkeringbell Some of your links, including that one, aren't bringing me to a comment
@Tinkeringbell ahhh okay :-p
@TheTinyMan Basically. Comments can't be voted on in a sensible way, so any useful information in them should be put in the related post instead
@JarkoDubbeldam Got it, thank you :-)

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