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00:00 - 17:0017:00 - 00:00

00:00
Erik has been known to be wrong
 
1 hour later…
01:09
@PaulWhite can't be proven
the code in this question to populate tables has crashed SSMS twice now
0
Q: Creating a non-clustered index on clustering key with some columns included

lifeisajourneyI have 3 tables: test_productInfo: contains information about the product test_productCreator: contains all the users in our system test_productOwner: contains information about who is the owner of a product(s). A cross reference table between test_productInfo and test_productCreator. My stored p...

Can anyone else run it?
@PaulWhite lol burn on Erik or burn on me? 😉
 
2 hours later…
03:41
@ErikDarling Runs for me, SSMS (v18.4) hasn't crashed yet. But I'm 10 minutes in, and the first query "CURRENT Query" is still running / hasn't returned any results yet.
 
5 hours later…
08:22
Morning
@ErikDarling At the risk of stating the obvious, turn off execution plans
SET NOCOUNT ON;
SET STATISTICS XML OFF;
That should be in the script really
@bbaird really good.
Morning
transcript ✅
 
2 hours later…
10:06
A chairde - Morning all!
10:22
I created an ArangoDB tag this morning - even though it's of minority interest, I think that it's one that should be there. I know nothing about it and the tag stuff is just blurb from the website. Any takers for improvements?
11:18
There's very little point adding such tags, but not much harm either, so meh.
That indexing question has a depressing table 'design'.
What indexing question?
The one one-boxed just above. The only question visible on this page.
The one Erik was referring to
Anyway, why "little point"? It's a valid database system and the question doesn't appear to be astro-turfing - so, in the spirit of inclusivitiy (which we all embrace, naturally!), I think it's as well to have it! Who knows, we might be overrun by ArangoDB enthusiasts in the near future?
Because no one will use it, and no one can answer such questions anyway.
You always make the same argument, and none of the weird db tags has ever gained traction.
It's a bit cart before the horse for me, but as I said, meh.
It's not like we don't have heaps of useless tags already
And no real way to manage them.
OK - I shall refrain in future from creating tags. It's not a hill that I fancy dying on...
11:25
Up to you.
I just don't see much value in it.
@PaulWhite Could have just used a json to save some trouble. Leave some varchar(100)s for the rest of us.
@Zikato If the world runs out of UUIDs, it'll be partly his fault
Anyway, it's a spreadsheet, not a database
You could say that design is 'Excel-lent'.
( •_•)>⌐■-■
(⌐■_■)
2
I'm putting on the glasses, so you don't punch me.
🙄
11:49
@PaulWhite quite risky there
@ErikDarling I couldn't think what else might cause that issue. It runs pretty quickly for me.
Well, not the first time.
The first time I wrote the SET statements and forgot to execute them.
Perhaps something wonky with 19 preview
I'm running:
v 18.12.1
I had a lot of misgivings about answering that because I felt like OP would tell me their real code was different. No table or local variables etc.
Yes, I had the same reservations
Fully prepared to be OPped
Also, it's a very routine question
11:53
If that happens I hope you drop a global ban
I couldn't be bothered to talk about specific indexes and row goal issues, for example
Cute that DOP 4 is only twice as fast as DOP 1
And they're on 2012, which excludes sensible use of columnstore
@ErikDarling tbf DOP 2 might be as well, I didn't pursue it
They should just buy your training course anyway
Ideal candidate, assuming they have money
Heh yeah, I often think about how many performance issues I spent gobs of time on pre-batch mode that could have been ilwipednup in a few seconds.
I'm sure they'll be obsessed with small spills and logical reads for a while longer
Do you remember their previous question?
11:58
@PaulWhite they apparently don’t have enough money to read 15 years of free blog posts
Good point
@PaulWhite yes about paging methods
The one with the answer that had the same final line you would give
Seems they got a roundabout answer to both
2
A: Pagination solution increases the logical reads but decreases execution time

Vladislav ZalesakRan into a similar problem. A semi-complex application screen with pagination that led to GBs of data being sorted. Selecting and paginating only the PK led to a massive drop in data being sorted, and while it happened (not sure if always) that logical reads were higher, sorting only a few MBs of...

I should've just linked it to begin with
12:01
Next thing you know they’ll be asking why scalar UDFs reduce logical reads but increase CPU
heh
Hm. I have a whole laptop with 2022 and SSMS 19 but can't be bothered resuming it from sleep
Bored itself to sleep anyway
Maybe they have SSMS checking trancount after every statement now
Life really is a journey
Anyway, thanks for your patience and collaboration so far
that's how we roll in the best friends club
RE: the unused tags, i think i like them so i can get an early start on ignoring them
12:19
I like them better than people who mix all the wrong tags on their post, e.g. SQL-Server, MySQL, PostgreSQL, RDS. - yea?
just give them one more tag to squeeze into the stew
re: tags - Why is there a limit of max five?
ducks and runs
I used to ask people why they added irrelevant tags
Most common answer was, "for visibility"
Hurts my brain
Sounds like they deserve irrelevant answers then.
kick ban
12:43
How am I sure if I answer any of their questions they'll accept it: dba.stackexchange.com/users/237735/trustno1
Maybe I'm being cruel and they've been traumatized in the past by trusting one or more people.
They're saying they trust themselves
Trust 'number 1'
😀
But what if they have low self esteem?
Wouldn't be surprised. They've only ever had one upvote (to 'correct' a downvote)
0
Q: P&T: which approach to take with app constantly creating new tables

trustno1A customer is complaining about low performance. No cpu or memory bottlenecks observed on the system. The problem is that their app is constantly creating new tables that are used for a while, then remain unutilized. This causes query plans to be always quite bad. I believe i tried everything: c...

And the question is: Which approach do you suggest me to take in this kind of situation? And my answer would be: Find those responsible and blow their heads off!
:-)
Only one answer to their nine questions too. Though they did get commented to death on at least one, so there's that.
12:52
My current number 1 on my "What if ...." list
> The Ukrainian power plant operator Enerhoatom has accused Russia of wanting to use nuclear waste from the Zaporizhia nuclear power plant to detonate a so-called "dirty bomb" itself. The Russian military has been conducting unauthorized work on spent nuclear fuel storage tanks over the past week, Enerhoatom said.
Makes no sense. They wouldn't need ZPP for that.
> British justice secretary Brandon Lewis resigned on Tuesday following the appointment of Rishi Sunak as prime minister.
- Reuters
@PaulWhite agree, but it would mean that Ukranian material was detonated, leaving room for interpretation regarding "Who dunnit?"
I don't know. One can invent all sorts of things. Does nuclear waste from one particular place have a fingerprint?
It's impossible to know anything.
I just hope no one does anything (more) stupid at this point.
2
at least not before halloween
i'm throwing a fancy dress party
Going with the black goat?
Philip or whatever his name was
2 days ago, by Erik Darling
Should I be Tony Soprano Getting The Newspaper or Black Phillip The Goat
13:04
> British justice secretary Brandon Lewis resigned
Excellent news!
Not news for those reading the transcript
@JohnK.N. Hmmm... interesting. AFAIK, waste has a signature - so if a dirty bomb has a ZPP signature, then the invading Russian aggressors could say that it was the Ukrainians who did it?
@PaulWhite no, back to the bathrobe
a true horror story
Transcript? What transcript?
13:11
14 mins ago, by Paul White
> British justice secretary Brandon Lewis resigned on Tuesday following the appointment of Rishi Sunak as prime minister.
7 messages moved to Trash
Yes - what's the point exactly? Lewis couldn't stomach anyone who wasn't to the extreme hard right of the Tories?
Good (riddance)!
No idea, just saw it reported
Seems like the UK government isn't entirely stable anyway
Perhaps he was an outspoken Penny/Boris supporter?
I'd never heard of him before
Weren't all these people in the cabinet just given a job based off of immutable characteristics? If so, wouldn't them leaving be a good thing?
@VĂŠrace exactly my point
Or maybe he heard someone say, "Let's go, Brandon" and took them literally
2
@SeanGallardy Absolutely no clue how it works tbh
13:17
@PaulWhite I remember seeing a headline that she appointed her cabinet specifically so there were no "white men" on purpose.
Oh, I see
I don't know if the people who are resigning are good or not
I don't think that was true, though. Senior Cabinet positions perhaps
I don't know who they are, I just remember seeing the article
I hear there's misinformation to be found on the internet
Fact checkers told me, I think
13:19
This is what it said, which I could totally see as it's happening in the US as well:
> Following a bruising runoff against Rishi Sunak, Truss has prioritized loyalty and ideological alignment above all.
So I'm trying to create dynamic drop-downs in Excel... and it's possible if YOU PIVOT THE DATA HORIZONTALLY which strikes me as bad.
Someone is excelling today
It's all about Excel this morning
Best MS software
No, I'm not doing anything stupid, just creating some documentation for our ETL developers. I'm okay with other people doing ETL work as I find it tedious.
13:20
2 hours ago, by Zikato
You could say that design is 'Excel-lent'.
( •_•)>⌐■-■
(⌐■_■)
@bbaird The only person I can think of who would have a sensible opinion on that is billinkc
He was here yesterday, briefly
I saw. Maybe if we mention chicken he'll show up.
Normally does the trick, yeah
The fried (not friend) chicken from this place is really good goo.gl/maps/sbsaMFpNgT98Has17
13:24
chicken or friend chicken, does the method of cooking matter?
As long as it isn't fiend chicken
Friends don't cook friends
You know an email is going to be full of great factual data points when it starts with misspelling your name.
Good job you can't read
@PaulWhite Tell that to the Dom*** dinner party
I can't write either! we just witnessed this!
13:25
Your I/O has been slow and unreliable since moving to the cloud
Seems to be a common problem
I need to move back on prem, where the NVMe is fast and cheap
preach
Honestly the more I learn about the implementation details of the cloud the more I both don't want to use it and don't like it
2
The thing is, almost all of it is documented, but as we all know, no one really reads the documentation - other than the CIO quarterly magazine
13:29
I think the cloud, at least at this point, is one gigantic anti-pattern.
8
@bbaird I can't hit that star hard enough
Imagine doing the exact opposite of what you tell your own customers to do
gets my vote
"My database is slow"
"Ah, yes well I see you're on a SLO with 0.25 CPU cores...."
1/4 of a hyperthreaded core
imagine
IMAGINE
I installed a Windows Update on that just recently
It completed in the end, btw
🍾🥂🏆
Are these considered duplicates?
https://dba.stackexchange.com/questions/318701/creating-a-variable-procedure-statement
https://dba.stackexchange.com/questions/318413/how-can-i-do-conditional-authorization-on-a-column-basis?noredirect=1#comment621296_318413
13:35
I would.
@SeanGallardy Reminds me of this blog I wrote after multiple people asked questions on the main site here where almost their entire query duration was service tier waits 😁 RESOURCE_GOVERNOR_IDLE in Azure
> For my example query, more than 75% of the query’s runtime is spent being throttled by the service tier. You can tune the other 25% all you want, but eventually you’ll have “tune” the 75% - with your wallet 😜
3
@SeanGallardy Thanks, now my eyes are bleeding from... whatever that is.
@SeanGallardy Don't know. Can't quite work out what's going on there. Have they just asked an improved version of the old question?
I honestly can't tell, which is why I asked :D
I think maybe they are asking something new but... also.. I think they are just rephrasing their original question to take out the word "permissions"
Ok. I need to take care of the washing up, then I'll have a proper look
13:44
@JoshDarnell Boom goes the dynamite.
14:04
is there any way to get SQL Server to run this? I've tried from the DAC, but that doesn't work, and I'm out of ideas. I'd like to see if there are other columns in the resultset aside from those present in the sys.time_zone_info dmv
    SELECT
        tzi.*
    FROM
        OPENROWSET(TABLE TIME_ZONE_INFO, SYSUTCDATETIME()) tzi


> Msg 102, Level 15, State 36, Line 4
> Incorrect syntax near 'TABLE'.
> (Brandon Lewis) I'd never heard of him before
6-county secretary!
@HannahVernon No, that's internal engine items
right, I figured that would be the answer :-(
14:16
I hate that timezone alias. I'm always expecting my name
What are you trying to get, @HannahVernon
> I'd like to see if there are other columns in the resultset aside from those present in the sys.time_zone_info dmv
Look, we all know I can't read, let alone read the transcript
This room has high expectations of me
@SeanGallardy I'm just trying to figure out a more efficient method of translating datetimeoffset(x) values into other time zones - i.e. instead of AT TIME ZONE 'x'
I was hoping to see the rules, but it's no big deal I have a workaround.
AFAIK SQL reads it from the registry
14:23
Yeah, and doesn't cache anything
yah, that's correct. But the AT TIME ZONE clause is very inefficient
lol
look at the comments in part 1 of that blog post
heh
🤣
14:24
Jonathan does a good job of doing it wrong
> Hannah Vernon says:
July 23, 2021 at 10:31 am
I’ve been seeing this issue in Azure SQL Database on data with hundreds of millions of rows recently however each row could be from a different time zone. Also, what do you do if certain rows are before the switch to daylight savings time, and certain rows are after the switch to DST?
such hard questions
I'll never really understand why SQL Server doesn't cache the information
You could do it quite easily with CLR, but Azure SQL Database doesn't support that
AT TIME ZONE is one of those things that passed all the unit tests
14:26
I'm just going to see if I do a pure T-SQL replacement, (1) how hard it would be, and (2) for fun
@PaulWhite yah because they tested it in dev on 100 rows lol
like every good dev
exactly
@HannahVernon Why not use Joe's code when he open sources it?
@PaulWhite lol perhaps I will. Also though I don't have any actual pressing need for it right now so I'm mostly doing it as an excersize
Oh, the July issue is old news then?
boy did I blow that spelling
@PaulWhite yah that was for my old job
I just noticed the year
14:29
at this job they only use datetime columns
@PaulWhite at our age, years just blow by so I don't blame you
does seem that way
Apparently Rees-Mogg resigned as well
> LONDON, Oct 25 (Reuters) - Britain's business and energy secretary Jacob Rees-Mogg has resigned, Sky News reported on Tuesday, following the appointment of Rishi Sunak as prime minister.
the conservatives are imploding?
that makes me so sad
jeagl -> sarcasm
Don't know if it's significant. Ministers often resign after a change in leadership
14:55
@HannahVernon can you run a powershell from SQL?
[System.TimeZoneInfo]::GetSystemTimeZones()
15:06
@Zikato interesting
I'd need to write a powershell script for it, which isn't out of the realm of possibility, but probably not something I'll get to today
that seems to be in the timezone adjustmentRule class. I'm not pro either
https://learn.microsoft.com/en-us/dotnet/api/system.timezoneinfo.adjustmentrule?view=net-7.0
> Is SQL Server 2014 - 2019 and SSMS using Apache Commons Text?
:62253445 That PowerShell code is calling into the .NET base class library. It's calling the static GetSystemTimeZones() method on the TimeZoneInfo class, which returns a list of TimeZoneInfo objects. To get the transition dates and times, you'd need to call the instance method GetAdjustmentRules on each item in the list.
@JoshDarnell yah was just looking at the MS Learn page for it
if I was going to go to that length, I'd probably just write it in C#
15:16
lol
always relevant
Say PowerShell one more time
PPPPPPPPPowerShell
@Zikato The rest of you are always talking about all this crazy smart database related stuff - I like to try and help out with my main area when it comes up 😅
@HannahVernon Hahaha
@HannahVernon [double]$dare = 1
15:18
@HannahVernon That's the point I was making earlier. It's easy (and cached) in .NET but Azure SQL Database doesn't support SQLCLR.
@PaulWhite yah cloud sucks is what I'm hearing
It's just another hosting service unless you buy into their BS
Perfectly fine to run SQL Server in an Azure VM if you want to
Imagine giving up your vehicle to only use Uber
and then complaining about wait times
BSaaS
2
@PaulWhite yah that's what we're doing at the place I'm at now. Apparently TPTB have decided to use premium disk too, so it should be almost as fast as on-premises
15:21
@HannahVernon at 5x the price!
Not like businesses to waste money
(per year, coupons not stackable, new rates for premium users only, not available in certain regions, other discounts may apply)
yeah they're not looking at it from a cost perspective obviously.
(not available in AK and HI)
If it's cheaper to host on Azure (premium or otherwise) than elsewhere, I see no particular problem with it. My experience hasn't always been that companies spend their money wisely, is all.
I see SO are looking at moving to Mangled Instance. Presumably, that makes cost sense to them. Wouldn't be my first choice, but what do I know.
15:35
They are in for a T-R-E-A-T
Good thing it's almost Halloween
@PaulWhite Be careful about implying that the SO devs don't know something about databases, Paul.
I would never
Only the ex-devs 😀
not the SRE's?
I don't really know what an SRE is tbh
Site Reliability Engineer
15:41
Yeah, like I know what the acronym expands to
I was wondering if you knew the acronym but not what they do
do they know what they do?
Exactly so
Job titles have always been a bit silly
Modern times are on an exponential curve
I'm currently a Staff Site Salad Enthusiast
for example, what's a consultant actually do
invoice
Triple S E lol
15:44
Speaking for this consultant only, I write the occasional terrible query for Erik, then wait for alcohol to arrive in the mail
5
Like anything else, depends on the org
@PaulWhite sounds like a pretty sweet job
@HannahVernon It's not a job if you do what you love
Aaron wrote about those titles recently: Comparing DBA, DBRE, and SRE Roles
I switched to SRE and I do all kinds of things, but the SRE counterparts in Ireland don't do what I do. Same title.
15:45
@PaulWhite isn't that the truth
OMG people stop with the serious answers
Does this face look like I really want to know 😐
The time in Aukland, NZ, is 4:46 AM on Wednesday
God bless you all
@HannahVernon Correct, and it's the same here too
hence the request to not be serious, I am thinking
But Auckland is normally spelt with a 'c'
15:47
shit
I won't tell you what that stands for
@JoshDarnell thanks
@PaulWhite Yes, yes it does.
How about this one 🤡
No, that looks like the US Federal Government
I find it impossible to believe clowns could get elected
Certainly would never happen here
15:51
sarcasm_detected.gif
None of your elected moderators is a clown, that's for sure
I always struggle with the singular/plural there
@JoshDarnell Are you the "Josh" quoted at the end of Aaron's piece?
@HannahVernon mostly not.
@PaulWhite True, more of a weekend at Bernie's situation
@PaulWhite No. I did talk to him about the article at some point, but I didn't have much to contribute because I'm not in any of those roles.
Hard to believe there are other Joshes out there
Felt sure it was you
But no mention of a property portfolio so yeah
15:59
> The Post previously reported that a Russian insider confronted Putin personally to spotlight mismanagement of the war effort but did not name him.
^^^ because they didn't want to be dead presumably
All wars are mismanaged. They're allowed to start, for one thing
@PaulWhite The preferred term is "empire."
The Darnelli Empire - sounds like a Tyler Perry show
Check out the big empire on Josh
I suppose it's just rumour they're going to rename NC North Darneli
Maybe just start with a Josh County or sthg
He gets a royalty everytime someone says, "just joshing you"
16:06
He even has fans that name their entire account after his initials
Big star
@PaulWhite appeasement rarely works 🫠
oh lawd
are there any emoji supported by Windows
I even upgraded to 22H2 yesterday
Big wow that was
I should have spent the time watching some SQL Server for Beginners videos
2
heh heh heh
16:24
To my Tea people, what is your favorite brand? Go.
Tell me this room doesn't like tea, without telling me you don't like tea.
16:41
i like lapsang souchong, and russian caravan
but those are types more than brands
i used to buy from t2 but i think they're closed down. their site is always out of stuff.
No hot drinks for me.
NZ breakfast on the odd day I fancy tea, but only first thing in the morning. Otherwise, and even more rarely, regular black tea. We buy maybe one small packet a year.
yeah, i almost never drink it
espresso or bust
Wife has some sort of fancy earl grey in the mornings
We drink so much espresso
Having a home machine and locally roasted beans was the game-changer there
yeah, same
my new espresso machine is great. it's all push button, and almost no maintenance or mess.
16:47
brand?
my espresso machine is refusing to grind beans now, which sucks. But it is on warranty still so there is that I guess.
ours is entirely manual and needs servicing once a year but that's it
we do try to look after it
I've had it for a year so it probably needs a new grinding burr or something
undoubtedly De Longhi will let me know
we have a separate little grinder machine
just a simple dial to select the fineness
I have a separate grinder too, which I'm using right now, but it's just so much messier
16:49
mess is part of the fun
yes
can't beat the smell of freshly ground coffee
that's the one I have
looks not messy
I love having steamed milk with my coffee
it's actually pretty slick even though it's classed as a manual espresso machine
@PaulWhite life wouldn't be worth living without the smell of freshly ground coffee in the morning
obviously that's a first world problem though
16:57
@HannahVernon I prefer "Starts with RE"
A certain REEEEE sent out an email to several hundred MS contacts yesterday using the CC field instead of the BCC field
@ErikDarling nice!
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