The Heap™ – Consultancy ©®

Paul White

10:05

0

Q: A way to filter out parseonly statements from extended events?

I'm currently using extended events to capture query statements executed on a production environment. But the actual session is capturing also the activity of 'query parsing' done by operators to evaluate if a query is well written. I would like to have an example of how to filter out SSMS activi...

Question now has an example that illustrates the issue. It has been a journey.

ypercubeᵀᴹ

10:48

@Charlieface I don't follow how your suggestion would work. It just adds a computed column that is a copy of another column. This is confusing to me as well.

   constraint transitive_closure_FK
   foreign key
       (direct_ancestor_id, first_in_chain_id, first_in_chain_ancestor)
   references chained_records
       (id, first_in_chain_id, direct_ancestor_id)

Can you show in the fiddle how we could add a chain of 4 items?: a -> b -> c -> d

Paul White

11:05

Need to add in a computed column of first_in_chain_ancestor GENERATED ALWAYS AS (first_in_chain) and then add that into the unique and foreign keys dbfiddle.uk/yfWGwe3b — Charlieface 7 hours ago

(context)

Erik Darling

13:24

@PaulWhite perhaps only a third question will be required.

Charlieface

@ypercubeᵀᴹ No you're right, while it block cycles it also block four-level hierarchies. Maybe add a level column along with a computed ancestor_level? dbfiddle.uk/i4Jgzyp0

ypercubeᵀᴹ

13:37

@Charlieface yeah, that is what I have done in another similar implementation. Top_ancestor would be level 0 and every child have level+1 of the direct ancestor's level.

Paul White

13:52

hierarchies were a mistake

Paul White

14:04

7

Q: Recent Color Contrast Changes and Accessibility Updates

Last month, we kicked off an initiative around accessibility. We made the announcement on MSO because originally we had intended for the rollouts to only happen on SO and on the Teams product. Once the work on this began, we realized it made sense for some changes to be deployed network-wide. We ...

discussion featured announcements accessibility

Erik Darling

14:41

okay but what those of us who can't read

i need a site with all pictures and no words

Paul White

what colour would you like those pictures to be?

Erik Darling

a nice purple

Paul White

would clash with your fingernails though

Erik Darling

nothing clashes with black

except mismatched blacks

Paul White

SO Inc would never

especially if you're requesting dark mode

Erik Darling

14:53

you know

i really miss being able to paste images into chat

3

Paul White

yeah

Erik Darling

SO should buy jack to fix chat

sorry, "acquire"

Paul White

they'd need another billion at least

with overheads and whatnot

Erik Darling

oh, is he very tall?

Paul White

actually, I think he is

Erik Darling

14:56

he types like a tall man

Paul White

I've always thought so

secure in his altitude

elevated powers of reasoning

Erik Darling

tendons full of wisdom powering thoughts as they course down them from his sky-high brain

i hate when that happens

Paul White

Erik Darling

shouldn't that be "cryptogon"

sheesh

Paul White

could be a synonym

Erik Darling

15:00

eh all my stocks are fucking boat anchors right now

Paul White

I'm not really up on the financials

Erik Darling

can't really talk

Paul White

all my money's in gold

Erik Darling

teeth?

Paul White

specifically, one small ring, but still

Erik Darling

15:02

i thought you had a nice watch

cartier?

Paul White

yes I wonder what that's worth in this age of smart watches

I also don't have a gold ring because apparently allergic

Erik Darling

smart watches are dumb

Paul White

How anyone can be allergic to the most unreactive metal there is idk

Erik Darling

i know lots of people with gold allergies

skin turns green, breakouts that look like heat rashes

Paul White

oh really well I feel better about that then

Erik Darling

15:04

you'll just have to get platinum

Paul White

I tried the whole range

Erik Darling

platinum p

Paul White

rhodium, titanium...I forget the rest

I now have one made of greenstone

Erik Darling

titanium should be pretty easy

Paul White

Apparently not allergic to rocks

Erik Darling

15:05

sterling is also pretty well tolerated

Paul White

I've worn a silver chain around my right wrist for about 25 years

Seems to be the tightness of a ring fit that causes issues

Erik Darling

doesn't breathe as well, yeah

Paul White

anyway, I tried arguing with it, but no joy

so here we are in Acceptance

Erik Darling

one thing some people will do is coat the inside of rings with clear nail polish so the metal doesn't make direct contact

Paul White

yep we tried that!

Erik Darling

15:07

did you end up with the polish ring stuck around your finger when you took the ring off?

Paul White

it didn't seem to work v well for whatever reason
I assume it rubbed away p quickly

Erik Darling

usually needs 2-3 coats

coat your coats

Paul White

Seems like a lot of fuss

I'm also not great at routine maintenance

Anyway, up to that point, the only thing I knew I had an issue with was nickel

Made the mistake of wearing nickel earrings a couple of times when I was younger

Did not go well

Erik Darling

you didn't strike me as the pierced ear type

serves you right

Paul White

Yeah well I was goth so

Hmmm I suppose I do have half a share in a gold ring, and a diamond one come to think of it

I wonder if she sees it that way

Erik Darling

15:12

depends on who dies first

Paul White

how very true

sort of a shroedinger's share then

ypercubeᵀᴹ

@PaulWhite no jewellery is made of pure gold. you may be allergic to the other metals.

nickel, etc...

Paul White

@ypercubeᵀᴹ it's a good point. I did try 22ct, but still not pure as you say

anyway neither of us really cares---it's just a thing

great explanation for my small joke tho

Erik Darling

i'm just trying to figure out what kind of jewelry you can wear when i start my rap group

Paul White

the usual loose gold stuff ought to be fine?

ypercubeᵀᴹ

15:17

mithril

Paul White

I might have to wiggle a bit more than most maybe

@ypercubeᵀᴹ great suggestion, I'll look out for it

you'd think it'd be everywhere here

feel stupid for not thinking of it now

ypercubeᵀᴹ

it also gives protection against trolls

Erik Darling

is that how evan was banished to discord

Paul White

fits the facts

who can say what truth is though

Erik Darling

many things to many people

Paul White

15:32

that could be misinformation or disinformation

hard to know

three-valued logic indeed

Erik Darling

it's a dynamic situation

ebbing and flowing

Paul White

seems so from a cursory look

Erik Darling

many angles

Paul White

not so many angels

Erik Darling

the nice thing about truth is everyone has one

sometimes a few

my phone has prompted me to scan my ears for a personalized spatial experience

Paul White

15:42

nothing creepy about that

how are you finding the AlwaysOn screen?

highly available?

Erik Darling

turned it off

using screen shipping

Paul White

FedEx will be relieved

Erik Darling

this seems to be the lifecycle of presenter topics

Paul White

I wonder if Allan Hirt has an iPhone 14

Erik Darling

* beginner @language
* intermediate @language
* advanced @language
* the problem with @language
* we need a new @language
* reconsidering @language

Paul White

15:45

Sounds like Fabiano Amorim's journey with the optimizer

Could be a Universal Truth™

Erik Darling

hah

it's a shame he doesn't write as much anymore, i did enjoy his posts

Paul White

He's too rich and successful to give stuff away for free

Erik Darling

i had no idea

i didn't see a list of his cars in his twitter bio

Paul White

Oh yeah

Doesn't even offer a 75% discount these days

I shouldn't say mean things about him. Super-nice fella. V smart.

He does write for Red Gate from time to time

Not Top 100 though

Erik Darling

the tempdb post is the last one i remember seeing

though i do not recall the details

Paul White

15:52

eager writes and whatnot

tempdb cluttering up your buffer pool
He has a consultant named Manuel Checkpoint standing by to assist

Erik Darling

CHECKPOINT;DBCC DROPCLEANBUFFERS(); DBCC FREEPROCCACHE()

my ocd is enraged

Paul White

@ErikDarling Sue them immediately

Moved my message to where it made more sense

Erik Darling

@PaulWhite is she in the top 100?

Paul White

ha!

There must be a lawyer named Sue Immediately somewhere in the world

Probably goes by Susan

Erik Darling

i think there's a good chance of there being a Sue Them

Paul White

15:57

Partner in Sue, Grabbit & Runne

Erik Darling

lest we think i'm mocking pronouns

Paul White

Would never occur

I hope Sue Them marries Mr Blind and they decide to double-barrel

Erik Darling

hah

Paul White

Sue Settle would also amuse me

Lawyers, what a crazy bunch

Erik Darling

sort of regret not naming one of my daughters sue

Paul White

16:04

Is it too late

Erik Darling

for many things

for many, many things

Paul White

well that's chirpy

for someone with a personalized aural experience

Erik Darling

what do you expect from someone with black nail polish

Paul White

truth bombs falling like rain today

I might take to calling everyone Sue for a while

See how it goes

Might also start adding unnecessary accents to vowels

Erik Darling

i'm going to start pronouncing all ethnic surnames with the appropriate inflection

Paul White

16:15

Well that's just basic good manners

Bound to be appreciated

Easy win

Erik Darling

yeah but hardly happens

Paul White

Must be annoying when people pronounce your surname anglicised

ypercubeᵀᴹ

@PaulWhite I am more annoyed with the first name

Paul White

I understand Dárlîng can be difficult for foreigners

@ypercubeᵀᴹ Hello Suepercube

ypercubeᵀᴹ

ah. no idea actually how that would be pronounced

Paul White

16:19

ethnically

Zikato

Sue-cue-ell

Superman's daughter

Paul White

Ah Suez has arrived

👋

I see you brought your own accents

Zikato

Also, my daughter was allergic to gold or silver earrings, so we went with surgical steel. No complaints there

Paul White

@ypercubeᵀᴹ PäntèlÌs?

ypercubeᵀᴹ

the stress is on I, yes

Paul White

16:29

I always have to go to githûb to check

Zikato

Příliš žluťoučký kůň úpěl ďábelské ódy

Paul White

Quite right too

Zikato

That's a sentence containing every accented character in the Czech language.

Paul White

Translates for me as "Too yellow horse groaned diabolical odes"

Which is a handy phrase

Zikato

that's correct

Paul White

16:34

You czeched?

Zikato

totally

Erik Darling

That’s an interesting way to ask where the bathroom is

Paul White

I hear the Czech visit to Taiwan caused a bit of a tremor in the region

I'm all out of Czech news now

Zikato

you're more up to date than me

Hannah Vernon

Someone posted a comment on my Facebook post; "Soul to Trump is a flat fish." and I have no clue what that might mean.

Thought i'd ask the genius crowd

Paul White

16:44

It means you should moderate comments before publication

Also, you should not use Facebook

Hannah Vernon

Truth

Paul White

But: a sole is a fish, flat in appearance

"Soul is a fish to Trump" => he has no soul

It's very clever really

They're probably v pleased with it

Hannah Vernon

That's what I though too.

Paul White

Sole (fish)

Sole is a fish belonging to several families. Generally speaking, they are members of the family Soleidae, but, outside Europe, the name sole is also applied to various other similar flatfish, especially other members of the sole suborder Soleoidei as well as members of the flounder family. In European cookery, there are several species which may be considered true soles, but the common or Dover sole Solea solea, often simply called the sole, is the most esteemed and most widely available. == Etymology of the word == The word sole in English, French, and Italian comes from its resemblance to a...

See how flåt it is

Hannah Vernon

Vëry

Paul White

16:47

Practically two-dimensional

Hannah Vernon

That's the OP

Paul White

Comment to ask what people should do with their soles

And, what does it mean to "love American"?

Is that a sexual position of some kind?

Hannah Vernon

Lol

I replied "very drōle"

Paul White

Super

Zikato

@PaulWhite Yes, you lie on your back and screw grammar.

Paul White

16:50

heh heh heh

ypercubeᵀᴹ

@PaulWhite did you mean Sueper?

Paul White

I did, thank yoʊ

Erik Darling

I’m going to see Bullet Train

Taking bets on when Brad Pitt’s 70 year old abs make an appearance

Paul White

I thought they were on strìke

Zikato

You made me czech. He's 58

Paul White

16:59

Didn't your parents have a say?

Dear God when did everyone get so old

M*A*S*H turned 50 today as well

Hannah Vernon

Waits paitently for the sweet embrace of death

Paul White

Zikato

I would never guess that's a B.J. Hunnicutt.

Paul White

yep

my wife guessed it was the second colonel

Zikato

Growing up watching M*A*S*H we have a good dubbing here. Once I switched it to the original to learn English and was surprised that it had a laugh track. Made it near unwatchable

Paul White

17:06

Sherman T. Potter

chat markdown is a bugger isn't it. Escape with backslash

good job

Zikato

Potter was good, but I prefered Blake

Paul White

probably yeah, tough call though

oh apparently Henry Blake was only a Lt. Colonel

Also, Trapper John McIntyre and B. J. Hunnicutt were different people

Not sure I ever noticed. Or I forgot.

M*A*S*H was AlwaysOn and I'm not sure they always played in order

Zikato

I found it funny that the actor who played Trapper didn't even sign a contract, so he could leave immediately.

https://outsider.com/entertainment/mash-star-wayne-rogers-revealed-beef-studio-forced-departure/

Paul White

wow

Erik Darling

17:27

I can’t believe anyone I know watched that show

Did you also watch Hogan’s Heroes

Paul White

Yep

Erik Darling

Fogeys

Paul White

Also yēp

Zikato

Red Dwarf and 'Allo 'Allo?

Paul White

Much later but yes

Lassie, Black Beauty, Skippy the bush Kangaroo

Zikato

17:43

Are some of those made up?

Paul White

Flipper, 10000 leagues under the sea, Thunderbirds

Zikato

Black Adder. I thought they named one of the characters after Erik.

Paul White

@Zikato sadly no

Bewitched

Zikato

hmm, Alan Yu has left Microsoft

Paul White

17:59

His Experience came to an end

Paul White

18:13

0

A: SQL Server generating sporadic Memory Dumps

OPENQUERY & OPENROWSET functions are used quite frequently, using the latest ACE & ODBC drivers. Sorry. That's not supported, and now you know why. The Office System Drivers are only supported under certain scenarios, including: Desktop applications which read from and write to various files...

Surprising answer

@ErikDarling You were right about this! I completely mis-remembered.

Zikato

19:54

@PaulWhite Thank you. I've attempted to answer it.

Erik Darling

20:22

@PaulWhite twice in a day. Might be time to retire.

Bullet Train was quite a good movie.

If you have the chance to see it, you won’t be disappointed.

Assuming you have access to the same quantity of wine that I did.

It also helps if you smell good but I can’t help any of you sweats with that

Paul White

@Zikato I think you mean track causality on not off. Also, SSMS sends parse only in separate batches so the guid won't match.

@ErikDarling were there any 70-yo abs?

Erik Darling

20:40

@PaulWhite only mine

Assuming I have abs by 70

Might be a stretch

Zikato

You'll have abs, I'm sure of it

whether they'll be visible is uncertain

@PaulWhite True, thank you.

Paul White

21:29

He's right you know

Erik Darling

What

Zikato

sue for yourself

Erik Darling

22:23

Czech yourself before you sue yourself

Paul White

22:40

Sue's the moment

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The Heap™ – Consultancy ©®