The wat is going in my nose!

OK I guess it's the obnoxious time

dude you're free to disagree

@Adi The hell? How do you fit "wat" into double penetration?

im a manatee i make you work hard

@TildalWave I'd explain why you're wrong if it weren't so obvious

Not trying to be obnoxious at all

@Adi indulge me

how does removing liberties improve quality?

@TildalWave :|

I was writing a message until you typed that

I'm noping out of this

Gonna leave my Ctrl-Z anyway

@TildalWave People who already vote for "

I'm not sure I follow you

I was typing a reply to you

lads pls make love, not warcraft

Up until you totally twisted the shit out of what I said

> how does removing liberties improve quality?

So about those penis jokes

You might as well have said "How does killing kittens create jobs?"

Who would agree on killing kittens?

@Adi Well, I mean, someone's gotta clean it up...

@Adi If it fed the hungry...

did I misinterpret it?

You already painted my argument with totalitarianism even before I made it

Not cool

wot?

@Adi Um, well... you see... in China, beautiful girls were paid a lot of money to crush kittens to death with high heels. They shared the video in QQ groups and sold it, and made a killing. Pun not intended. :|

@TildalWave Of course you did.

@Tildal I'll try again

They also did that to baby bunnies.

Really sick

@MarkBuffalo wtf?

@Adi then why are you beating around the bush instead of explaining it?

is this foreplay?

@MarkBuffalo why beautiful girls ?

Oh my god! Can you chill for a fucking minute while I type?!

@silverpenguin No idea. Apparently this is some sick fetish following thing.

@MarkBuffalo that is nasty on so many levels.

@DavidFreitag Dude, that's going to get modedited so hard

I kinda wana google it but i fear my soul will be crushed and mentally damaged for life

droid-life.com/2016/03/07/…

@TildalWave We already "limit liberties" on SE regarding so many things. Those who have less than 125 RP can't downvote, and those who have less than 200 can't view the review queue, and those who have less than 2000 can't edit without triggering a review. All of that helps in improving the quality. So, now the second point..why it would work in my example.

WEEWOOWEEWOOWEEWOO Nest is on sale ^^

wait what just happened? I had 9 "new replies" (that yellow roundello icon) all of a sudden even tho I cleared those just a minute ago

@silverpenguin Yeah, I refused to even look at the non-explicit image that was provided of their faces

When the girl finally got caught by the police and arrested, she gave a "heartfelt apology" to the media... and said she was sorry, etc. Yeah right. Sick fuck.

@MarkBuffalo i love asian women, seeing beautiful ones crush kittens might ruin it for me

@TildalWave People who star "boobs are cool" and have 25k will keep doing it, but those with less won't (or rather can't). Since there are significantly more people with less than 25k than people with more than 25k, the only logical outcome is that we'll see a decrease in shitty stars.

@silverpenguin just don't. people are fucked up, and you do not need to participate

@Ohnana This

oh and i love kittens

for god sakes' it's a star. there is no cash prize attached.

@Ohnana Well either the feels will kill me, or the curiosity will. Pick your poison.

@silverpenguin My wife is Asian. There are nutjobs in every race. My wife isn't one of those... so don't let one idiot ruin it for the rest of them

@DavidFreitag curiosity killed...?

@Adi dunno man, if you look at what gets pinned, and you need some additional privileges for that, it seems it wouldn't do a thing

@MarkBuffalo lucky SOB

@Ohnana Cash? No. Morale boost? Yes.

plus, what's actually wrong with shitty things being starred?

@TildalWave It's kinda annoying

@silverpenguin Ha?

I find it comforting actually, that there isn't any really serious shit there

Landing an Asian wife is the easiest thing you can do as a Westerner

If his wife is great, then he is indeed a lucky man

But I wouldn't call him lucky because of the race of his wife

@Adi Agreed

@TildalWave Yeah but there's a difference between having nothing but bland serious sec stuff, and having really good crude humor.

@Adi Agreed

@Adi Finding a good Asian wife... now that takes some effort.

You have to wade through the waters of Golddiggery, and Passportchasing

@MarkBuffalo Finding a good wife/husband in general.

@Adi What if you aren't looking for a wife?

@Adi Agreed

@DavidFreitag Still easy

I agree that Markus agrees.

@silverpenguin Nope

That came out wrong.

@Simon Agreed

@DavidFreitag Agreed. Too early

@MarkBuffalo That happens to you too?

@DavidFreitag No, I mean when you... when we... the... never mind.

@DavidFreitag Dunno man, I personally wouldn't want "even more censorship"... so what if the star wall looks like ShitSESays? It gives me a fast overview of what was going on here while I was doing other things, so if all I find there is pointless banter, then that saves me the bother of reading the transcript

@MarkBuffalo (◕ᴥ◕)

@TildalWave I dunno I'm not saying there's a problem, but I get what @Adi is saying

I'm saying that even shitty star wall serves its purpose as far as I'm concerned

It used to be that only good quality wholesome penis jokes got starred in here.

why do i sit at work all day in front of my pc to come home and then sit in front of my pc

@silverpenguin Because HYPNOTOAD

@silverpenguin Because you're fully embracing the nurd life.

Did anybody see that flag?

Somebody flagged a message from 4 days ago!

@Adi In here?

@Simon Some other room

@Adi Ok phew.

@Adi The level of butthurt was pretty extreme in that flag

The user's post was entirely reasonable and professionally-handled... and it gets flagged.

@DavidFreitag onion belts!

OH MY GOD! I hate homework!!

@Adi What are you working on?

I've spent the last 2 hours just copying Nessus results into a stupid template

It's a school homework

Like.. line-by-line into some very specific shitty template

@Adi scripting FTW (although not if you only have to do it once)

@Adi ugh

@RоryMcCune I have to do it one more time next month, then no more

So scripting to parse Nessus XML into specific Word format

@Adi well I guess scripting could at least make the process more fun :)

@Adi well RTF ain't too difficult

Word is somewhat trickier

@RоryMcCune Not really, just get VS2015 CE and make an office extension.

bit more leg work than say a ruby script tho

@DavidFreitag yeah that's trickier than just programatically creating RTF with ruby

that said Excel is easy

as there's a nice ruby lib for it

@Adi github.com/raesene/TestingScripts/blob/master/… as an example

You're a nice ruby lib.

@Adi You're parsing the results to put into a document file, then?

@RоryMcCune yeah just make a csv

If you use xls, you can just use \t to separate columns, and \n to separate rows.

@RоryMcCune No no, you see, I get it

@RоryMcCune Wait no no

Did you write that?

@Adi yes

I use it for tests

@MarkBuffalo There's a ready DOCX template that I need to fill

Take from Nessus results, fill the doc

ah, ok. well just rename the .docx file to .zip

and unzip the contents

:|

add the lines you need to add to that

Use that template to find out what you need to change, then re-zip, and rename to docx, if you aren't using a library

I just use libraries for that kind of stuff

@MarkBuffalo have you ever actually tried that Word XML is hideous

excel is ok 'cause the data is easily formatted

@RоryMcCune I have had to on occasion, and yes, it's hideous

but programatically creating word docs is enough to make you go mad!

xls is pretty simple: column1\t column2\t\ncolumn1 results\tcolumn2 results

@RоryMcCune I am indeed a madman. I'll do whatever it takes to get the job done, lol. Sometimes you are limited, and cannot use libraries... so ghetto tricks like this have to be applied

@MarkBuffalo that's fine for the basics but a decent lib can do things like conditional formatting which is handy

agreed, and that's why I suggest a decent library

@RоryMcCune Oh my god! github.com/raesene/TestingScripts/blob/master/icmp_recon.rb

You're the one who wrote that one!

I've used it before

@Adi huh whut, that's just a script I knocked up for ICMP stuff a while back :)

@RоryMcCune I used it in the OSCP lab

Oh my god! It was so helpful!

@Adi ah well glad to see it's useful to people :)

@RоryM As soon as I opened your nmapautoanalyzer.rb I said "Hmm.. I really know this coding style from somewhere"

Then browsed the repo and found that I've used the icmp script a few months ago

@Adi yeah they're all pretty similar at a base (take options, execute some stuff, present results in hopefully useful format)

I found it through a thread on Hack Forums

I've not actually done much with them in a while 'cause I mainly do single web apps these days, but actually doing some externals for the next couple of weeks so might have cause to brush them off again

didn't realize @RоryMcCune was a programmer

I thought he was a point-and-click superstar. This is pretty good stuff

@MarkBuffalo ooh no I'm not a programmer, I just hack together scripts that sometimes do what I want

aka you're a programmer

that's what programmers do

:]

Let's see... proper use of Hash, Array, etc

proper exception handling

Only a programmer would write code like this.

I guess I'm gonna have to go back to using Fiverr again

@MarkBuffalo I read some programming books before I wrote some of those :)

It's fantastic for doing the grunt parts of your homework

@RоryMcCune Your github makes me realize I need to start sharing some of the stuff I worked on

I like it.

@MarkBuffalo yeah I mainly do it so I don't lose things, but also sometimes the scripts are useful to people ,which is no bad thing

Creating scripts to simplify your job is a really good idea

I have like a million gui interfaces for doing that... because I like guis :|

@MarkBuffalo Throw some on GitHub

Let those forks and stars accumulate!

@Adi NDA's out the ass on almost all of them

:'-(

Then do that for the stuff you can post

> almost all of them

WILL DO

Problem = Solved

@MarkBuffalo I like GUI's for tasks I don't do often, command-line scripts for stuff I use more often

@RоryMcCune Command line is easier for sure. I just like visually-nice things so that people who come after me can use the products I've created without needing documentation, etc

a lot of stuff is like "point and click on this button without reading any documentation, and you're on your way to victory."

only a fool of a sysadmin would blindly click on a button without documentation detailing what it does

well, the learning curve is greatly reduced by clicking on a button

isn't that very thing the exact thing that people who use computers should do less of?

Oh, look. My most favourite person in the DMZ is here!

oh the sarcasm is wounding

@kalina well, I don't create malicious things at work

@MarkBuffalo That's what people who create malicious things at work say

Lol

ok, well I do.... because I have to. but everything... this is futile. I will lose this argument

you lost this argument the moment I joined in

#winningattheinternet

true

#sigh

#kalinabestawesomegirlever!

Can hashtags have exclamation marks?

#adimasteredsarcasm

@Adi ...

no of course not

do you even social media

@Adi why are you being so nice to @kalina ?

is it 'cause you figure marrying someone from the UK would be a good way to get citizenship?

@RоryMcCune Because she's such a fantastic person whom I like a lot?

@RоryMcCune Is it?

If it is, I have much better options than Kalina

@Adi I'll help you get citizenship. wink

I started learning Dutch today. God bless Duolingo

@Adi well I'm probably no expert but I thought that was the case

I hate it when support people treat you like you're a complete idiot

@Adi hallo, ik ben mark.

Dutch is a really nice language

@DavidFreitag Because 99% of the people who call them are complete idiots who 95% of time say they're not complete idiots.

@MarkBuffalo Your face is a really nic- wait a minute.

@DavidFreitag I know, but they have to follow the script to deal with people who are complete idiots :(

@Adi This is a zendesk for a private company for customers buying high-end calibration equipment

If they don't follow the script, they literally get fired

No matter how stupid the script

I doubt they get many issues a week even

Hell the entire company only has like 20 people

And their useless piece of shit software that was written in like 1932

why are you using them then?

Fluke are pretty much the only people who make this equipment. It's a pretty niche field.

@DavidFreitag @RoryAlsop can tell you all about that year if it can help you.

I could write our own software but due to budgetary and time constraints I can't

@DavidFreitag calibration of what?

@TildalWave Precise flow calibration

and there's one company that does it? :O

1cc/m up to 100l/m

@TildalWave The old faithful used to be Sierra Calibration Systems, but they went out of business forever ago

They use glass cylinders of a fixed size with pistons that get sealed with mercury. As the piston rises due to the flow rate a sonar head at the top can very accurately measure the position of the piston and subsequently the change in volume and the flow rate through a bunch of maths

who does NIST use?

@TildalWave Something similar to the above. The issue is that our flow range is much larger than the NIST flow range.

> The three PVTt standards cover flow ranges of (1) 1 L/min to 100 L/min, (2) 10 L/min to 2000 L/min, and (3) 900 L/min to 78 000 L/min respectively.

We need to be able to calibrate systems on a massive range from down to 0.1cc/m to 100l/m

you're limited to US based providers only?

No

At this point it doesn't really matter, we've spent something like six figures on the new calibration lab and we're not getting new hardware just because Fluke's software is shit

I think there's some company here close by doing exactly that, I'll check

I mean don't waste any time on my behalf, it's not really going to change anything.

bah, my bro would know their name, and he's unreachable for the mo ... all I can do is google

At any rate, the flow hardware is really nice.

It's funny how in Russian army training footage they train against "US Army"

So fucking silly

@DavidFreitag is that flow rate control, or metrology only?

@TildalWave It's for calibrating our instruments.

yeah I guess it's supposed to be both for calibration anyway

that is the worst photosho i have ever seen

oops, wrong window

@silverpenguin Photoshop?

Many of our instruments use Mass Flow Controllers, but they aren't very absolutely accurate. So we trim them in software using interpolation values collected during calibration.

@Adi that star and us army text ....please dont tell me thats not photoshop

@silverpenguin It's not

Low absolute accuracy and quite good repeatability.

@Adi i mean you might as well. us army is pretty globally involved

@Adi Gotta have an enemy. For us it's "terrerists"

terriers?

@Ohnana But, come on.. imagine if NATO used trucks marked as "Russian Army" as targets for training

That's like North Korea-grade shit

@Adi russia would cry 5ever

however, nato and the US give zero fucks

@Ohnana It reminds me of the picture with the browsers, and IE is eating paste in the corner

Reminds of my time in the army. They used "targets" with Israeli flag

So fucking silly

Used to make me laugh so much, but I was good at hiding it

@TildalWave Actually, no sorry. NIST uses a collection tank and measures flow rates using accurate pressure transducers.

It's super accurate, but not really feasible for our setup.

@Adi brainwashing? what brainwashing? now let's all watch this delightful film!

Gotta sneeze

Wont come out

That feel when you solve a critical business problem with 25 lines of code

That feel when that sneeze finally comes out

That feel when that po.... never mind

@MarkBuffalo That feel when you sneeze while that's happening

Like a shotgun blast

I wonder how it would feel looking at these messages after a few years

I'll take a look at my messages here from the first days

@Adi I do that every now and then

OH MY GOD!

WHY DID I DO THAT?!!!

@Adi Your brain: "You gotta."

I cringed at a rate of 10Ghz!

A 10 giga cringe? wauw

Oh my god. I can't stop

I need to stop

stahp

Why was I such a shithead merely 3 years ago

I'm not saying I'm not a shithead anymore, but my god was I shittier!

@Adi Let's ask Svetlana, perhaps she knows?

@DavidFreitag :|

@Adi yeah that'll happen, but hey rejoice in the fact that you're less shitty than you were :)

time to signout with shame

improvement is key

I'm weary of mods showing up to hammer me in the face for being naughty.

@RоryMcCune Indeed

@DavidFreitag when did that happen?

@RоryMcCune Check the star wall?

@DavidFreitag there's some things there... did the mods hammer you for them?

@RоryMcCune not yet, that's what I mean

@Adi I still have some chat logs, I believe, from around 18-19 years ago on IRC

Mostly I'm hoping for a tasteful modedit by @RoryAlsop

The level of cringing is just... well, actually, I deleted them for that reason.

@DavidFreitag and that I won't pin them to the starwall for all eternity?

I have some IRC logs from the first day I got internet

@RоryMcCune No that I don't mind, in fact it's definitely encouraged :]

@MarkBuffalo Was this a sample?

@Adi Nope, this is relatively tame... and awesome.

Okay. It's a sample :p

@MarkBuffalo ...right...

Quit pizza-hatin'

Ooh.. I now remembered!!

In a couple of months I'll have my next promotion

You know what that means?

FREE PACKAGE FROM FINLAND TIME!!

@Adi Drinks on you?

I had decided to send to two people this year

Probably to one of the Rorys (for both) and someone else

@David I already know that I shouldn't send to you

@Adi Just email me if you're planning to, my address changed a few times since last time.

imgur.com/gallery/iFRlx

Oh my goodness.

@DavidFreitag Nope

I don't want the U.S. customs to destroy it again

@MarkBuffalo my usenet history seems to go back to abou 1996 which sounds about right

@Adi :[

@MarkBuffalo it's from the SNL skit

@RоryMcCune Cringe-worthy?

@RоryMcCune I know, but that's just... well, wow. lol

@MarkBuffalo yeah some of them, some of it was just oold, I used to hang out on novell.community.chat back in the day

@Adi I think just follow this list and you'll be fine. about.usps.com/publications/pub141/…

@DavidFreitag the star wall made me sound like a evil abductor

I'll have to think of something to send you. I still owe you from the last one.

@Ohnana Herm?

> Human corpses, human organs or body parts, human and animal embryos, or cremated or disinterred human remains.

Now where's the fun in that?!

@Adi In many countries, customs usually demand that you declare every single item in the package, and sign it

If you failed to declare 1 item, it could be seen as smuggling

@Adi Well that explains why you never got that bag of penises I sent you

@MarkBuffalo He sent me a few food items including alcohol and an Ensiferum thingy

@DavidFreitag You're both probably on the list because of that

@MarkBuffalo Declared everything

Apparently, they don't like alcohol anyway

declared or not

@MarkBuffalo IIRC it was a small bottle, everything was small enough to fit in like a 6"x4" padded envelope

@Adi Did you send it from Finland?

@MarkBuffalo Yep

Fucking 35ml bottles

Well @Adi if you do decide to send something to me, let me know. I'd be happy to pitch in for shipping to use a small cardboard box instead of a padded envelope this time.

Yeah, your name and last name are of jewish origin, so that shouldn't trigger anything weird

:< I don't think you can mail liquids though

at least not as a non-business

@MarkBuffalo I didn't even include my name

@Adi So who is the sender?

@MarkBuffalo I don't include sender info in anything I send

Not even a return address...?

Newp

@Adi Wait you mean I held on to that padded envelope all this time for nothing?

Yeah, well.. if you don't have a return address, I think it will be seen as suspicious and likely discarded.

@DavidFreitag When you move to some decent country. Probably after president Trump takes office

In school, as kids, we were taught that no return address usually means it'll get thrown away by the postal service

@Adi Mail it to @Simon and I'll drive up and grab it

@MarkBuffalo Nääh. Modern mass scanners detect liquids automatically very easily

I'll also get the package

It got flagged for that