The DMZ

Anonymous

12:00 PM

Why store so much?

Anonymous

I mean, Jesus...

MechMK1

They're sick, basically.

Anonymous

You don't need terabytes of porn, you're never going to watch it all.

MechMK1

At some point, the acquisition of "something new" becomes the only thrill

It's like women buying shoes

Anonymous

Yeah, that's actually a very good point.

MechMK1

12:01 PM

There is no logical reason to buy a pair of high heels that looks exactly like the ones she bought 2 years ago, but she will still defend it, saying that the toes have a slightly different shape and the strap is 0.2mm wider.

It's the same with pedos

But as I said, analysis software gets better and better

Anonymous

@MechMK1 Yeah my girlfriend does that a lot...

Anonymous

(the high heel thing)

MechMK1

:D

Anonymous

not the collecting porn...

MechMK1

Time for you to acquire a high heel fetish

Then you're golden

Anonymous

12:02 PM

I mean she does look good in them...

MechMK1

There's an image hash database by interpol, which stores image hashes

Anonymous

:)

MechMK1

The gentleman's fetish

:D

We all do

I am, proudly so

Anonymous

That is weird.

MechMK1

My ex was disgusted by it

Anonymous

12:03 PM

:D

MechMK1

As soon as I mentioned it to her she freaked out

Anonymous

Really? I am not surprised actually.

Anonymous

My girlfriend likes that I like it so win-win I guess.

MechMK1

I am surprized that in the same conversation, she told me I must be open and honest to her

Anonymous

Hahahahhahahahahahahah

MechMK1

12:04 PM

And that she didn't catch the irony

Anonymous

I wish I could say that I was surprise by that...

MechMK1

Reminds me of a meme :D

Anonymous

But given everything you said before, I am not.

MechMK1

She: "Babe, I'm really upset after tonight. You really have to do better"
He: "Yeah, I agree. But you do too"
She: "If you can't accept me for who I am, then you don't love me for who I am"

Anonymous

Hahahahahahhahahahahahahah.

Anonymous

12:05 PM

Yeah, that is a BAY ZED one for sure.

Anonymous

Absolutely bay zed.

MechMK1

Truly

Well, things could have been worse

Stuff is actually going quite well

Anonymous

I am really lucky because I see my girlfriend sometimes not even 7 times a week (we live in the same house) and she has never once said that to me.

Anonymous

"you have to do better", never.

MechMK1

A girl who's really into cosplaying sends me a lot of "preview" pictures of her cosplay photoshoots

Anonymous

12:07 PM

Hey that's awesome!

MechMK1

Which is fucking awesome

Anonymous

Yes, yes it is.

Anonymous

Glad to hear that!

MechMK1

Yeah, she's very nice too

Anonymous

That's great, I am glad to hear it.

MechMK1

12:08 PM

But she has a boyfriend, so I won't do anything out of line

But still, talking to someone feels nice

Anonymous

I'ma keep it 100 here, as they say.

Anonymous

I don't personally believe there is anything wrong with "cheating" unless you're married.

MechMK1

I think there is

Anonymous

I really, truly believe that. Shitty take, I know.

Anonymous

Yeah, most people think there is.

MechMK1

12:09 PM

I wouldn't want to cheat on my gf, and I wouldn't want my gf to cheat on me

If she did, I'd leave her

"But it was only one time" - One time too often

Anonymous

So, here's the thing. I wouldn't cheat, because I don't want to. I don't like people anyways.

Anonymous

But, the whole idea that you should be bound to someone before marriage, I disagree with it.

Anonymous

I am on the minority of this argument, for sure.

MechMK1

The thing about me cheating on my gf would require two people to be interested in me, so I know for sure that won't happen.

Anonymous

But, my girlfriend feels the same way.

MechMK1

12:10 PM

Well, you have to be able to justify your actions, not me

There are people who are in an open relationship, and if that's fine with them, so be it

Anonymous

She has openly told me, if she wanted to cheat she would. She just wouldn't ever want to. Which is exactly the same way I feel.

MechMK1

I don't want to be in an open relationship. Loyalty is important to me,

djsmiley2kStaysInside

but...

/me shrugs

@MechMK1 yeah this.

Anonymous

I think I said this before but we don't really agree with the whole idea of "relationships" so.

djsmiley2kStaysInside

I mean, if they know you're doing it - it's not cheating

MechMK1

12:11 PM

But hey, cute cosplay pictures

Anonymous

We're not an "open relationship" or any relationship.

MechMK1

Yesterday was "Maid Day" in japan, apparently

djsmiley2kStaysInside

@MechMK1 oh yeah

you look, you don't touch :D

MechMK1

Which, I'll be honest, was the best fucking holiday ever invented

djsmiley2kStaysInside

rofl japan so weird.

MechMK1

12:12 PM

Japan is based, you mean

Anonymous

Japan is very bay zed.

djsmiley2kStaysInside

/me is lost

MechMK1

"no trust me, it's absolutely essential in your role as cashier that you wear a french maid uniform today"

djsmiley2kStaysInside

is this some new term?

MechMK1

"based"?

Anonymous

12:12 PM

@MechMK1 hahahahahahaha

djsmiley2kStaysInside

yeah

MechMK1

Based has been around forever

djsmiley2kStaysInside

as an... adjective?

MechMK1

Even the ancient greeks used it

ἀρετή

Think about based as the opposite of cringe

Anonymous

I think it might be pizza time.

djsmiley2kStaysInside

12:13 PM

hmm, so like 'awesome' ?

:D

MechMK1

It's more complicated

djsmiley2kStaysInside

/me suddenly feels very old

Or is it the fact they don't seem to have limits? :D

Anonymous

knowyourmeme.com/memes/based

MechMK1

It's the fact that every country wishes they could have a maid day, and Japan just has one.

"agreeable" doesn't quite cut it. It's kind of like a "you know when something is based" thing

Anonymous

yeah thats actually not a good explanation

Anonymous

12:15 PM

its more like... i dont know like

Anonymous

reality, like.

Anonymous

down to earth in some sense, idk.

djsmiley2kStaysInside

:D

Anonymous

you just know when something is based.

djsmiley2kStaysInside

Ok, glad we've cleared that up :D

MechMK1

12:16 PM

Oh god, it reminds me of the Astolfo monster can incident :DDDDD

With the US voice actress!!!!! :DDDDDDDDD

djsmiley2kStaysInside

I'm so lost :D

I'm glad normality has been restored.

MechMK1

Wanna hear a funny story?

djsmiley2kStaysInside

Sure.

Anonymous

By the way Mech, obligatory booba incoming for you when seeing cosplay picture.

Anonymous

djsmiley2kStaysInside

12:17 PM

Tho I'm confused to as why my tooth has stopped hurting.

Anonymous

you're welcome.

MechMK1

@Jis12yearsold. The girl I talk to has somewhat flat booba, but it's okay

Anonymous

thats okay

MechMK1

This is Astolfo

What's your first impression of Astolfo?

Anonymous

suspenders make me >.<

djsmiley2kStaysInside

12:19 PM

that sword is too long for her to carry.

Also the handguard is tiny, so she ded.

MechMK1

him

Anonymous

monkaw

MechMK1

Astolfo is a guy :D

djsmiley2kStaysInside

he ded.

Anonymous

MechMK1

12:20 PM

J has the weirdest boner right now

Anonymous

yeah. i like suspenders a lot.

Anonymous

monkas

MechMK1

Don't worry, we all had questionable thoughts with Astolfo before

Anyways

So there's a scene in the story of FGO, where he dresses like this:

Which gave rise to the "schoolgirl astolfo" outfit

djsmiley2kStaysInside

ffs stackexchange plz fix chat scrolling

MechMK1

:DDDDDD

Anonymous

12:22 PM

oh jesus

MechMK1

So there was this guy

A cosplayer, who did an astolfo cosplay

The first few pictures were normal

Anonymous

thats a trap if ive ever seen one

Anonymous

probably shouldnt use the word trap

Anonymous

but who gives a fuck

MechMK1

Then came this tweet

And then he lifted his skirt

And I swear that dong was huge

Anonymous

12:23 PM

you know, last time my girlfriend came in i was able to explain the anime tiddies

Anonymous

i cant explain this

Anonymous

lmfao

MechMK1

Like seriously, a MASSIVE schlong

Anyways, this basically broke Twitter

Anonymous

Hahahahahah

Anonymous

lmfao

MechMK1

12:24 PM

And everyone talked about Astolfo

When one of Astolfo's voice actresses saw Astolfo was trending, and said she's very happy that her character is so beloved

Then she saw. You know she saw, because her next tweet was just "oh my god"

Anonymous

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA

MechMK1

Ever since, Astolfo is sometimes portrayed with a can of Monster

Anonymous

thats hilarious

MechMK1

It really is

Also, obligatory question, but would you?

Because I fucking would

Anonymous

no lul

Anonymous

12:26 PM

ill just buy the outfit for my girlfriend instead

Anonymous

not change sexuality

MechMK1

[image of shadow the hedgehog holding a gun, saying "Looks feminine enough for me"]

Anonymous

thats a bit drastic...

Anonymous

lul

Anonymous

@MechMK1 HAHAHAHHA

MechMK1

12:27 PM

:D

I don't have time to find the meme

I have like 50k memes on my phone

Anonymous

:D

MechMK1

Anonymous

lol

MechMK1

12:28 PM

My standards for a girl:
- Is alive
- Is a girl (optional)

Anonymous

Hahahahaha

Anonymous

i mean hey, modern science does wonders...

MechMK1

You know what's really funny?

In every official work, Astolfo is shown with the male master, and the male master is always fondling Astolfo

In every single work

Even in the Bond 3 dialogue, Astolfo complains that you can't keep your hands off him

Anonymous

okay. im out of pepe's

Anonymous

12:30 PM

used them all

Anonymous

except monkas but i used monkaw instead

MechMK1

Astolfo chan Kawaii Eng Subtitles.

►

Basically FGO

Also, Learning with Manga predicted 5 star saber astolfo!

Anonymous

HakByte: How to find anything on the internet with Google Dorks

►

Anonymous

hak5 has descended

Anonymous

into pure trash

Anonymous

12:36 PM

do people still watch this garbage content

MechMK1

>posting on-topic in the DMZ

Anonymous

they've made this video 6 times.

Anonymous

jesus fucking christ

Anonymous

its embarrassing.

Anonymous

How To Catch a Catfish w/ Retia

►

Anonymous

12:37 PM

LOOK AT THIS TRASH

MechMK1

"Sec.SE has a chat? I'm sure all the cool hackers talk about 0-days there"
"So yeah, i totally would fuck Astolfo"

Anonymous

THIS IS THE MOST DEGENERATE CONTENT IVE EVER SEEN ON A "HACKING" CHANNEL

Anonymous

hak5 has clearly gone mainstream. they seem to only post topics which an idiot is interested in these days, -1

Anonymous

its fuinny because its not even working for them, averaging 20k views with 693k subs, gg

MechMK1

Are they explaining google image search now?

Also that's a bit of a schizo take to be honest

You meet someone online and immediately scour the web for every bit of content they have ever posted

"By the way, did I ever tell you that funny thing that happened to me in high school once?" - "No, but I read it on your facebook account already"

Fucking what is wrong with people

Anonymous

12:41 PM

Yeah....

Anonymous

Its really strange.

Anonymous

this channel has descended into pure trash lmfao

MechMK1

"You can match up the area code to where they say they are"

You can't keep your phone number in the US when you move?

"By the way, I know I couldn't tell you before when we were talking on the phone, because I was a bit too nervous, but I...I really like you. Every day I'm looking forward to when we can talk together."
"Yeah about that. I just did some OSINT research and saw your phone number has a wisconsin area code, but you said you lived in florida. Explain yourself!!!"

Anonymous

Man pizza is good.

Anonymous

@MechMK1 HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

MechMK1

12:56 PM

@Jis12yearsold. Like...what the fuck?

Anonymous

@MechMK1 Yeah, I mean, people really do get like that though.

Anonymous

It's worrying.

Anonymous

I mean, there's paranoia and then there's... That.

Anonymous

They need legitimate help. Not a relationship.

MechMK1

Jesus fuck

Transcript for