Nice, the software rendered GBA game

On the second day, she sent me a text message while I was at work, saying "Can you bring me a sandwich on your way home?"

She was referring to a pre-packaged sandwich sold at the grocery store that I would go to. That grocery store is, contrary to her assessment, not "on my way", but actually a one hour detour. Half an hour there, half an hour home

@MechMK1 Yeah I'm going to write a question on Retro.SE.

I told her "I am busy with work, plus it's not on my way. If you want a sandwich, either go buy one yourself, or just make one. We have bread, salad, ham, etc. at home"

No response

So, it's 20:00 and after 2 days where you are en route for basically 14 hours daily, you can imagine how fucking tired I was

So now, my wonderful, loving and supporting girlfriend greets me at the door

@forest Would you like to know what she greeted me with?

Or, would you like to guess?

(how do I upload to imgur without using chat?)

@forest IN the question

There is an image button

oh

@forest Just take a wild guess which one it is?

wtf

No, it was actually B. She also cooked for me, and started a bath too. Then she gave me a massage to help ease my tensed up muscles

But seriously, when she said "Where is my sandwich?"...

I think in this moment I understood why some men hit their wives

I never hit her, ever

But in this moment I understood why some men do

I told her that I was going to completely ignore what she just said, and I will take a bath now.

You know what I want out of a relationship?

Just a tiny shred of respect for what I do, really

Something like "I know you had a long day. I'll cook dinner tonight" or such

And you know, actually cooking dinner and not cracking an egg into a pan and then adding every spice and condiment we have in the house

Just hold me sometimes and pat my head and tell me she's happy to be with me

Fucking hell how hard can this be?

I tried some e-dating platform before

I got 2 replies: First was "thanks, but no thanks" and the second was "No thanks, but you can sub to my onlyfans here"

I have lost all faith in me

I lost all faith in relationships

The idea of someone treating me like a normal person seems so foreign

Because nobody ever did

Basically the only time someone ever touched me was to hurt me

I have such deep emotional scars that I have no idea how anyone could even begin to look past them

I'm a fucking wreck

And even if, even if a woman were to look past that, why would she?

Why would anyone actually go for me? I look like a failed abortion attempt. I have the social skills of a moderator from r/incelsRiseUp and that's about it

Look, there's winners in life, and there's losers

And you, J, you're a winner. You have a great job, a girlfriend who loves you, you'll marry her one day and you'll have two beautiful daughters, who will always think fondly of their great father

And I, I have a pillow that I cry into every night while I imagine how wonderful it will be when I'm finally dead

That's up to you

Live your life however you see fit

I want nothing more than a family

And I will never have one

I'm just Darwinism in action

I'm that fucking boxcar with one tiny wheel that landed on its head

I'll just get sorted out next generation

I'm a failure. End of story.

And I feel really sorry for my mother, because she always tried her best to raise me well, and I feel so awful for disappointing her.

It's a possibility

But I will be honest: Believing that it's possible that things will get better just make me feel even worse

Because I get my hopes up, only to have them crushed again

As I said, my social skills are fucking horrible

Good enough to find someone who looked at you and said "This man is the man I love"

So did I

Yeah the shit thing is that even if you meet someone you like, oh great, she lives across the globe

I know

Honestly

I don't think anyone would even care about me that much

I appreciate the sentiment, really

But there is nothing about me that someone else can't offer way better

Sure thing

I've never gone out like that before, but why not?

Anyways, it's getting late

I should go to bed now

Meet up somewhere like DEF CON. :P

Too much social anxiety for that

Also unrelated, but just posted my RC question as MechMK suggested some days ago:

Yeah, let me have a look at that first

It's funny, while I was with my gf, I was a lot more social too

Tom still hates me :D

Because I'm far-right

lol

But the hate isn't mutual

Dude some of your views, at least from the perspective of an American, are not very far right.

I always say things like "I hope you have a wonderful day" and "I hope you have a lot of success in your new job"

@forest To a german, they are

The concept of "Nationalism" itself is a taboo for them

The fun thing is, he accused me of "ruining the DMZ"

Oh I'm sure. But your views don't have enough of a "free market is the solution to everything!" slant that would be needed for an American to consider truly far-right.

Because apparently "It used to be a place of thoughtful discussion"

@MechMK1 Seriously? Well I think those guys might go to some private Slack channel.

@forest Because it's not

Yes :D

Funny thing is, aside from him, nobody ever complained

Is that the The DMZ alternative, or a different one?

Like, if 5 other people had told me I'm a fucking cunt, sure, I would understand him

I vaguely recall something about an alternate DMZ on Slack.

But he is the only one who ever openly had a problem with me

idk

Oh it's probably not the same then.

Well idk the name. I just recall someone talking about it.

Most likely, yeah

But the thing is, that's on him

I've only ever been friendly to him

His response was to dox me :D

Yeah

He posted my full name and my private e-mail address in the DMZ

He probably told himself he's going to "fight against the evil nazis"

He does not seem like a very friendly guy then.

I knew he seemed a little tense on the subject of politics, but damn.

He's never been that friendly to me, but that's okay

You could get him banned for that.

I asked Rory to scrub the DMZ history from that (so even mods can't see)

Maybe he's banned from here lol

And as far as I know, he also has a private convo that he can't just fucking dox me just because he doesn't like me

No, he came here after that too

But damn, talk about a guy overreacting. I'm not sure if he disliked me or not, but he seemed not to like me because I don't hold far-left views (despite being left-wing myself).

I wouldn't want him to get banned

I mean, the DMZ is for him just as much as it is for everyone else

But fuck man, he got his almonds activated pretty hard

@MechMK1 Haven't you been here for like... 10 years though? It's not like you're new and ruining the site.

And that's how things should be

Pffffff

A year or two tops

He's definitey been here longer

huh

I thought you were here for a lot longer.

I've been on SE for a long time, but not the DMZ

And even on SE, 99% of my old posts were just programming questions

Back when I was a teenager learning how to code

> Member for 10 years, 3 months

On SO.

Yeah

Not like I've been active

I'm honestly an oldfag, shit..

That's not how you use that term. Shame on you.

That's probably why the SO I remember and the SO there is today are so different

:^)

:^D

Well people come and go. And supposedly this place used to be way more active before mods almost nuked it due to people being too... free spirited? Or something. It was before my time.

>too free spirited

As in...?

I mean I posted shota hentai the other day

I have no idea. Rory just said something about mods trying to nuke it.

Gotta post more haikus then

Well to be fair you didn't actually post hentai. You referred to it and posted a SFW image.

It was a page from a hentai manga

Not my fault that it didn't contain nudity

I could post a page that contains KISSING

I don't think they have. Rory is still here. I imagine if anyone actually did something really bad, they'd get hit hard. But as it is, it's not like we're doing anything but making references to memes.

Unless they bother checking the delieted posts

Or I say there there is nothing wrong with fascism

That's what got me banned last time :D

My deleted posts at least are nothing more than slightly edgy.

Also you know what's weird?

How Tom once told me that I am "Misusing my freedom of speech"

When I said "There is nothing wrong with fascism"

^ true

@J-- Well I'm a free speech absolutist, so... I imagine he disagrees strongly with that.

No, but it doesn't even make sense on a conceptual level

You cannot possibly "misuse" freedom of speech

Because if I genuinely believe that fascism is a viable ideology, then saying so is "Freedom of speech working as intended"

I think that's likely for other reasons.

Most of the people who don't come around a lot haven't gotten triggered by Mech.

:DDDD

I don't know anyone like that

Must have been gone before I came here

And even then, just man up and tell me to shut the fuck up

People are so fucking quick to report but can't hold a civil discussion

The best cure for bad speech is free speech.

It's so hilarious

People say that I as a Nazi want to control freedom of speech, and I tell them no, I want people to speak freely. And yet they're the ones who want to censor me.

Like, the fucking irony...

Thinking in terms of right and left wing is often dangerous. It's not a 1 dimensional scale.

That is true

Especially since "right" or "left" mean vastly different things in the US than europe

@J-- Oh I constantly edit answers if I can improve them. I just wish I could sage so they don't all get bumped unnecessarily.

I heard it works if you put sage as the editing reason

@MechMK1 Yep. Where I'm from, left wing means anti-gun, censor everything you don't agree with, big government. Right wing means military superiority, obsessive free market, corporations can never be wrong. The concept that we're not a sports team of "us vs them" just does not compute.

@forest I literally disagree with all of these things

I'm very much pro-gun, anti-censorship, small gov't, military to the degree where they can protect the countries own border (military must never operate outside the countries own border), market restrictions and dab on corporations

@J-- Bloody 'ell

@MechMK1 Which makes you a rational person, even if you do hold views I disagree with (I'm very much anti-nationalist, although I can understand their reasoning). I'm left libertarian. I believe in freedom to own firearms. I also believe in social services. I think military should be limited to self-defense, and government regulation should focus on crimes with actual victims, and crimes of corporate corruption. But 'murrican right wingers think left = commie, left wingers think right = nazi.

@forest I completely understand your views and don't see a problem with them

People have no fucking clue who the Nazis were. Let me find that clip

O_o

I think family should be more important than ideology

I think they're not comparable, and you can have both.

If I had a son and he'd have a black girlfriend, I might disapprove, but it's his life, not mine. And if she makes him happy, then I am happy for him.

Family should not interfere with ideology and vise versa.

You told me before

I'm sorry you have to deal with this

I'm not for police brutality

But I am also not for police having to say "Please stop assaulting this woman" and idly standing by

In germany, it took 8 cops to take on one 15-year-old migrant kid

@J-- Absolutely not

In the US it'd also take 8 cops, and they'd all shoot someone.

Sprinkling oil in the fire, I see :D

lol

Sop yeah, anyways, it's really getting late

Time for some existential dread

Have a good night, my friends!

g'night, my genocidal far-right nazi friend :^)

And try not to get banned

Sieg Heil, my friend :D

(disclaimer to anyone reading this: that was a joke. lrn2humor)

Also @J-- best wishes to you and your girlfriend. I wish you both the best!

Serious Cryptography is No Starch Press, right?

They're both pretty basic primitives, but a block cipher is often considered to be a "universal primitive" (at least until recently... nowadays people are moving on to public permutations)