The DMZ

A: How can I watch porn, safely, and not get a virus? (and not infect corporate data also)

2:00 AM

-2

pornphase.com has been a trusted source of porn since the late 90's

anyone here to nuke it?

2:19 AM

@ScottPack then why didn't you? :P

also, heya!

I did.

@ScottPack As spam? How come it didn't downvote automagically then? It did when I flagged it, plus I added -1 of my own to it.

Oh whoops, I flagged it for mod attention.

2:39 AM

you're gonna get flogged for it when @AviD wakes up :)

3:16 AM

Oh my

3:39 AM

@Adnan You are starting with the assumption that CISSP has value in the first place. ;)

@ScottPack Because you know @AviD needs new sites to visit?

How kind of you.

4:06 AM

That's how I roll.

Stack Exchange

4:54 AM

Biologically speaking, what we call a 'snake' is actually a human digestive tract which has escaped from its host.

5:47 AM

Oh @LucasKauffman, lunch beer tomorrow or Friday?

@TerryChia friday preferably then

@LucasKauffman Cool.

7:06 AM

@TerryChia I know it's fun and all to say that and we can laugh about certain certs, but you rarely get certs because you want to gain knowledge

CISSP does indeed have a value, not to me, not to us, but to certain employers.

When I'm in dire need for a job, and CISSP will enhance my chances of getting I job in which I'm interested, then it has a value

Shitty certs have value, mainly because a lot of people think they have value.

I think the closest thing I can think about to describe this is that they have a fiat value.

7:22 AM

yes but if you had a choice, would you really choose to work at an employer that selects its employees based on them having a worthless-but-for-fiat cert?

btw they also have value for consultancies, since government (which is a big but crappy market) usually requires the certs, for lack of any capability in judging the actual quality.

@AviD This I think, is the key point.

@TerryChia I think its also the main reason I stopped paying to renew my CISSP. I realized that it was only helping me with clients I didn't want, anyway.

The main problem I have with CISSP in particular is that competent infosec professionals that has been in the industry for a number of years more often than not have enough contacts to bypass the whole HR bureaucracy. It's only useful to those looking for entry level positions and you can't get it at that point because of "lack of experience".

Which leads to the whole thing that @ScottPack mentioned about lying about your years of experience.

it is a relatively new thing, since it is so common they started demanding it as a minimum requirement, and then the more experienced dont bother meeting "minimum requirement", so then it only applies to juniors... who shouldnt have it... but are required to because of clueless HR.

this wasnt the case when I got my CISSP, I was either the tail end of it being respectable, or the beginning of it's fall.

holy crap, me getting a CISSP is probably what caused it to lose any respectability.

@AviD Probably. ;)

7:44 AM

@AviD aaand you're doing it again

@Adnan "it"?

making assumptions about having a choice?

You're applying your "I have 10000 years of experience and tons of high-profile clients" model to us.

Being young, you really don't have a lot of choices

as I always tell my kids - you always have a choice. You might not choose your circumstances or situation, but you can always choose how to respond to the situation you're in.

@Adnan haha, you flatter me.

> "If you choose not to decide - you still have made a choice."

@AviD Oh, I'm free to choose between working for a shitty employer or live off of welfare checks... such freedom!

see?

7:47 AM

Petite assole!

@Adnan hahaha, cursing in french! it's like wiping your arse with silk.

@AviD "French"

well no, there are always opportunities for better employment. worst case there are plenty of companies willing to hire remote workers.

@AviD Maan, for someone your age, you have a very pink image of the word when it comes to this

Or, you're just trying to paint one

@Adnan yes, yes I do. I insist on it.

7:50 AM

Or, for someone my age, I have a pretty dark one

@Adnan that is the primary choice.

everything else flows from that.

Skittles for breakfast

to be fair, when I was younger, I had a much darker view also.

Like a boss

@kalina pink!

7:51 AM

Mouthfuls at a time

2

Just... Om nom nom

Are you giving Adnan grief first thing in the morning?

That's unacceptable

The world is a dark place

He is right to look at it and hate the way it works

Anybody who ever achieved anything got there in no small part from a lucky break

@kalina Correct

@kalina Incorrect and stupid

@kalina even if that luck included the qualities he was born with, the conditiions he was raised in, etc.

@Adnan not incorrect or stupid, unfortunately

@AviD yes

@Adnan correct, because in her world view we are all moist robots who function according to our programming. So if someone chooses to work his ass off, that is because he was lucky to be wired that way. And if someone succeeds in countering his programming, that is just because he was programmed to.

@AviD there is no need to put me down just because you disagree with my ideas

additionally, working your ass off never results in a guarantee of success

you'd have to be pretty naive to conclude that working hard is all that is required

8:04 AM

Hmm, secondhand 20" monitor for $50. I wonder if I should pick that up.

@TerryChia Your third one now?

@Adnan Naw, just my second if I buy it. I'm using a single 23" now. :(

@kalina no, I wasnt actually putting you down - this time.

@TerryChia Hmm.. From experience, I can tell you that monitors with different heights are very annoying

@kalina no, not all - working hard together with brains, of course.

8:07 AM

Dragging windows from one another becomes very infuriating

@TerryChia 20" monitor? like a tablet size?

@AviD You have a 20" tablet?

All countries in the world that use the mmddyy date format @amazinmaps http://t.co/3NYS0yciTP

Tweeted by LordManley on April 18, 2014 at 5:17 PM

@TerryChia no, but thats closer to tablet than to a grown-up monitor ;-)

@TerryChia Compared to his.. you know.. everything looks very big

I still think countries that use yyymmdd are the real mvp

8:09 AM

@Adnan hahaha!

Boooya!

@LucasKauffman Yeah, date by order of most useless information

dd.mm.yyyy is the shit!

@LucasKauffman that is insane. Who the hell uses 3 digits for the year???

@AviD 014 ftw!

@TerryChia I think it would 201.

or something based on the writings of Mr. Hubbard.

@AviD Carrying on with the "most useless information first" strategy?

8:11 AM

@Adnan and most important information, never.

@AviD even the most intelligent person in the world could be under appreciated simply by lacking luck. Hard work isn't all there is to it

@Adnan this, and different resolutions

Fuck that, we should all be using seconds from unix epoch.

@kalina Oh man! Different resolutions are the biggest bullshit ever.

especially when the screens physically look the same height

fuck that noise

I'd rather not use the monitor

maybe I'm just spoilt

Take a window of 10cm from one monitor to become 5cm on the other

What the actual duck?!

8:13 AM

space time distortions

different quality of monitors takes it though. Switching your eyes from a beautiful IPS to a crappy TN can send you into a fit.

Jesus, moving the eyes from one to the other is actually physically painful sometimes

@AviD yes

multi monitor setups should ideally be built from identical panels

even then you get variance in panel quality

I have literally spent probably a day during my lifetime in total adjusting brightnesses on screens to make them look the same, only to fail

@LucasKauffman it sorts nice

@kalina Reading text on the left one then looking at something on the right one

8:17 AM

not so much yyymmdd as yyyymmdd tho

MY EYES BURN!

@Adnan easier to compare numbers :p you can just substract

@TildalWave yea that's what I meant

you bunch of ant fuckers

can't imagine it, how'd that look like?

@LucasKauffman aaaand he's drunk

2

@Adnan that's just a saying if one nags about details

8:19 AM

what's the time in Singapore?

@TildalWave maybe he meant AntMan.

we also call them vinegar pissers

4:20 PM

or mosquito sifters

@TildalWave niiice

8:20 AM

@LucasKauffman I like that one

and it really is!

and I'm not drunk -_-

@AviD What? No that's not a bot, I just typed it here to google it LOL

My mouse middle button died, do with this info what you want. Knowing you bunch here, and being the middle button,...

now I have like two dozen mice all fucked up in various ways

is there some way to connect phone to comp and use it as a touchpad?

@TildalWave huh?

I was saying that it was nice you saying that @LucasKauffman was high.

doing the doobie.

smoking some pot.

@AviD high on what?

8:25 AM

doing them drugs.

@AviD in singapore?

seriously, you guys never heard of 4:20?

@AviD I'd like to live for a bit longer, thank you very much :P

@AviD I didn't know which niiice you meant, maybe you thought I typed "what's the time in [x]" and a bot tells you

@TildalWave seriously, google for 4:20.

8:25 AM

@AviD the movie?

420 (cannabis culture)

420, 4:20, or 4/20 (pronounced four-twenty) is a code-term that refers to the consumption of cannabis and by extension, as a way to identify oneself with cannabis subculture or simply cannabis itself. Observances based on the number 420 include smoking cannabis around the time 4:20 p.m. (with some sources also indicating 4:20 a.m.) on any given day, as well as smoking and celebrating cannabis on the date April 20 (4/20 in U.S. form). == Origins == A widely discussed story says that a group of teenagers in San Rafael, California, calling themselves the Waldos, because, "their chosen hang-out spot...

and you said that in response to someone asking if @LucasKauffman is drunk....

@AviD well we all know who's the pothead amongst us now (apart from Kalina)

@LucasKauffman @LucasKauffman?

@LucasKauffman @TildalWave?

Does 4:20 have anything to do with 42, the answer to it all?

8:27 AM

@AviD YOU

@AviD not sure but doesn't that stuff grow naturally in your regions?

@Adnan looking at web pages when both panels don't produce the same colour vibrancy and stuff like gray becomes white when you move a window from one panel to the other

@LucasKauffman not here, no. probably too hot and dry for it.

why is there a conversation about my religion occurring in chat?

Phrases from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy is a comic science fiction series created by Douglas Adams that has become popular among fans of the genre(s) and members of the scientific community. Phrases from it are widely recognised and often used in reference to, but outside the context of, the source material. Many writers on popular science, such as Fred Alan Wolf, Paul Davies and Michio Kaku, have used quotations in their books to illustrate facts about cosmology or philosophy. == Answer to the Ultimate Question of Life, the Universe, and Everything (42) == In the radio series and the first novel...

no.

though Douglas adams may have been high when he wrote the book.

@AviD May have? Have you read them?

8:29 AM

@kalina CIA should use that to extract information

Dont they already use Britney spears?

it's like saying Carlos Castaneda may have been high on occasion

@AviD now that could be a tactic, you could like get all the Marie J you can get your hands on and then build gass bombs from them to bomb gaza, then you'd have like hippie palestinians doing fuck all but talking about how bad Israel is and smoking pot in mini vans

Or that Brazil might have received a goal or two at the last World Cup

don't make out that getting high casts you off as somebody who doesn't take action

it's perfectly possible to make meaningful actions while high

8:32 AM

@LucasKauffman "I love you, maaaan!"

it just takes 37x more effort and energy than usual

"No, I love YOU!"

you're thinking of mdma

@kalina 42x more to be precise

@TildalWave no, I've measured

extensive testing

8:33 AM

@AviD they would share their land with everyone, grow crops and everyone would be one happy family

it's actually 36.5578656199566321

but it rounds up to 37

@kalina so extensive you lost count?

@kalina for SCIENCE!

@TildalWave no I document everything in detail

every 7 seconds

to ensure that no data gets lost

I used to do 10 seconds, but I find after 7 seconds there is a 30% change of distortion in the figures when I transfer them from my brain to paper

rising rapidly at 8 seconds to 70%

also extensively tes... ooh, a squirrel

I was high while driving around last night

@kalina . youtube.com/watch?v=bPN2gOsil_k

8:35 AM

and then I aborted my mission because I met one of my failsafe conditions

@kalina that being high while driving is dangerous?

@AviD Humph. So it's fine when you link to collegehumour? :P

I've told myself that if I ever catch myself clearly not thinking about driving, while driving, that I must immediately stop and wait for 45 minutes before re-evaluating my position

oops that doesnt look too NSFW

@kalina an octogenarian overtook you?

8:36 AM

and while I was driving around, I spotted a squirrel while in the middle of overtaking

so I pulled over

nobody can see a squirrel at 70mph

so therefore I wasn't paying enough attention to the road to continue

@kalina How do you establish that? Does thinking about how you're not thinking about driving while driving not count as thinking about driving while driving?

so I sat in a layby watching firefly

it was a fun use of my time

@TildalWave no that's a subconscious process

or... a background service, for you geekier people

@LucasKauffman you know, not normally

but last night I picked up some new stuff

and it knocked me for six

9:02 AM

just like this chat's activity

9:13 AM

@kalina you are the only chat activity ... mostly

9:41 AM

@Nick That's not really true.

The DMZ would have some activity even without @kalina.

@FEichinger but not nearly as much

@kalina just raises the overall activity of the room.

9:58 AM

fb02itsscan.fh-muenster.de

LOL they REALLY don't wanna read what reason I blocked them with :))

@TildalWave what did you do?! :p

let's just say I rewrote their own text somewhat

@Nick Do? Nothing. It's just another one of those "we're just researching" scanners. I'll also "just research" them, let's see how they like A LOT of research

spinning up AWS ...

@TildalWave oh god

Tsk, tsk, tsk.

Actually, no, it's the FH. Carry on.

Le roi est mort... Vive le roi!

10:08 AM

@FEichinger C'mon that's just a front, it's like Cyveillance or BrandCertified ... and some professor prolly found a way for his pupils to write crawlers for him that he can market

wtf 10 year old girl shooting a Galil with high accuracy

What's wrong with that?

@kalina do you know how heavy a galil is?

3.75kg

Or

oh weight it's only 4 kg o.O

10:15 AM

8.27lb

I guess the real question is... Do YOU know how heavy a galil is?

10:27 AM

or if he knows what gun that 10 y/o is shooting

Or that she's 10

or that it's a she

Or that it's human

@TildalWave Pedobear approves of that statement. ;)

@TerryChia dude that's mean, plain mean

10:45 AM

@kalina 4.2 KG

without the magazine

That's not what Google says

@kalina hmm. Wikipedia says 4.35. I was off by a bit.

Are you suggesting that Google is wrong

> SAR 5.56mm: 3.75 kg (8.27 lb)
AR 5.56mm: 3.95 kg (8.7 lb)
ARM 5.56mm: 4.35 kg (9.6 lb)
SAR 7.62mm: 3.85 kg (8.5 lb)
AR 7.62mm: 3.95 kg (8.7 lb)
ARM 7.62mm: 4.45 kg (9.8 lb)
Sniper: 6.4 kg (14 lb)

there, settled

@TildalWave or maybe I had the AR, and it was WITH the magazine.

that makes more sense.

10:50 AM

That is my go-to answer to that.

@AviD don't worry, I don't know what we're talking about anyway

11:05 AM

I could kill for a massage right now. I drank too much coffee in the past few days and now my kidney area hurts like hell. Any suggestions what I could do on my own that doesn't involve heavy medication? I kinda need to be on my feet ...

@TildalWave Build a time machine and stop yourself from drinking that much coffee.

Did you notice how I sound really smart, like I just went back in time with more experience and stopped myself from posting random nonsense in DMZ? No? Then you can see where my problem is.

@TildalWave drink way too much clean water. it will wash out your kidneys.

I am not kidding.

Make sure you add dish soap.

God I hope not, I still need them LOL

that, I AM kidding about

@TildalWave no, I mean it will wash the coffee out of your kidneys.

11:15 AM

yeah I'm trying to drink something that's also diuretic but no caffeine

also maybe give yourself a day or two caffeine free.

elderflower syrup to be precise, not too bad of a taste either

seriously, wash it out with H2O.

heh, I really need to get out more.

I just hi-5'd myself.

it's mostly H2O but also a pretty strong natural diuretic, it's kinda similar to beer in that regard

@LucasKauffman @AviD can grow bushes in his regions? It does grow wild everywhere in southern Spain, which is weird when taking the kids for walks along the river...

11:19 AM

@RoryAlsop I know you tried, you gave it your best effort, but it really didnt work.

you ruined it by mentioning "kids" in the same sentence. Highly inappropriate.

@kalina sure you can. And then you should assess it as not a risk (or possibly is a risk, if it is aiming for you) and deal with it accordingly. If you get a chance to take the Police Roadcraft or the IAM Advanced Driver training, you'll be surprised at what you can focus on while driving at 70 or even 120mph or more

@AviD excellent. I was going to separate into two sentences, but figured someone would star it

shame on you.

Starprude.

@AviD I'm not exactly sure that's shameful.

is anybody else getting gmail down?

@AviD Didn't Asimov or Heinlein write a book with that title?

11:24 AM

@AviD Working for me.

@AviD works here

hahaha, that would be awesome.

@AviD works here

hmm. So I guess it IS my DNS settings.

@AviD ahh the famous self-five

11:25 AM

yeah, big dog felt as ashamed.

@RоryMcCune I think Barney also had one.

@AviD quite probably, but I don't watch HIMYM as much as scrubs :)

@AviD More than one in fact.

@TerryChia no, he usually refused it, as it doesnt count.

@RоryMcCune My middle daughter watches HIMYM - she suggests I should. I have only seen one episode (one where the main guy proposed to Willow - well that's how I remember her) and while it was vaguely amusing I went off to do some work instead...

@RoryAlsop That would be the pilot.

11:28 AM

@RoryAlsop middle daughter?!? I only recall you having two of those...

@RоryMcCune "middle child who is a daughter"

when you have a lot of them you must speak in shorthand

@AviD Hmm, let's see how many I can find then. I remember there being more than one.

@RoryAlsop but yes alyson hannigan will always be Willow as far as I'm concerned

heh, okay you're right - but keep going!

11:30 AM

This one (sorta) counts.

@AviD probably, but surely more amusing to read it to suggest that @RoryAlsop has secret additional children :op

That's it on youtube. But we can always enjoy the compilation of high fives.

@RoryAlsop Also, you should totally go watch HIMYM.

@TerryChia seconded