The Awkward Silence - 2017-10-05

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Extroverted Main Man

12:48 AM

0

Q: Question About Texting Cues - Thumb sign and V Sign

I have always been slow to adapt. I have an inbuilt distrust of anything new... Social media has been around awhile now, but I have only dabbled with it on and off. However, now I have a friend who would like to stay in touch through social media and texting, so I'm learning the things people my ...

friends making-friends texting phone-usage

Extroverted Main Man

1:19 AM

0

Q: I'm very introverted and only have one friend, do I ask too much of him?

I'm a male college student and I've really only got one friend. I never know how to interact with other people. I'm quite good at programming but that's probably the only thing I'm particularly good at. I've met my friend when I moved to a college dorm 6 years ago. We started to get along very w...

friends relationships boundaries introverts anxiety

2 hours later…

2:55 AM

Ha ha ha:

didyouknowfacts.com/gamer-dumps-girlfriend-issues-ultimatum/…

1 hour later…

4:20 AM

> Not accessible in your country.

:/

Gypsy Spellweaver

4:36 AM

@AJ Try this link, m.imgur.com/gallery/AE9mY

Sans commentary but it's still the whole story

4:54 AM

LOL

5:23 AM

LOL

6:05 AM

@Tinkeringbell O/

Good morning @AJ

Morning

Where did you get that screen?

From an old laptop ;)

It's too bright.

Brother and me were trying to make a backlight for drawing from an old lcd screen... It's not coming along nicely ;)

6:08 AM

I see you got all the privileges now. Congrats.

Thank you! That help vampire did something right after all ;)

Now, on to 10k! ;) Goals are always nice ...

Great

How are you doing repwise here?

I am at 3k (rounding off).

So you're almost at your moderator priviliges as well! Nice ;)

6:13 AM

Right now, I am focusing upon 25k goal on M&TV. Though, it's still a long journey.

@Tinkeringbell I have moderator privileges on 2 sites now.

Well, I'll stick with only IPS for now. Takes enough time as it is ;)

Where do you get the time to do that? !

Jarko Dubbeldam

@Tinkeringbell Well, once you have the rep it is hard to lose it. So longevity helps a lot there.

@JarkoDubbeldam Ah, of course.

6:28 AM

@Tinkeringbell I usually check new questions and see if I can provide a good answer. Though, I don't have particular number of answers that I should provide daily. :)

@AJ Oh, I'm on a strict schedule of writing 3 answers a day ;)

just joking. Of course, setting those goals would be wrong on so many levels!

Sounds funny. I should set up such a goal especially for topics I have no clue off. I think that might get funny.... not >.<

Morning By the way. :)

@dhein I'd love to see you do that. Thinking about things isn't bad :)

Which topics don't you have a clue off? Do you mean on this site, or on another se?

Morning :)

@dhein Morning

First I was thinking of this site, yeah. But that would be too easy, as giving a somewhat usefull answer to 3 out of 5.5 questions each day over here wouldn't be too hard. So l think a good challange would be doing it on sites like, Gardening and landscaping, Mi Yodeya (answering questions about Yoda, isn't it?!) And maybe..... Mathoverflow :D

6:40 AM

@Tinkeringbell I once answered 4 questions on M&TV and 3 of them hit HNQ.

and if I'm like realy tryharding I could add russian language to that list '^.^

@AJ That's nice (and not so nice) for your rep.... since it's capped at 200 a day.

@Tinkeringbell Yep, but I didn't expect them to hit HNQ.

@dhein ah, so you're just here to relax ;)

@AJ I never really do when writing an answer...

in The Screening Room, Jun 5 at 6:19, by Ankit Sharma

Looks like AJ is on answer spree

6:42 AM

@Tinkeringbell: HAHAHAHA I know what you are doing and still its almost working '^.^

@AJ Hahaha, I've had days with answer sprees as well :)

but nobody ever notices :(

@dhein Almost? Then I should try harder...

@Tinkeringbell Well, the poster is a mod, so he will most likely notice this.

@AJ Ah that explains :)

For me most of the time my questions get HNQ but I think just once it was answer of me. Well, you did well. The only thing that stops me from doing that, is that I think neither Mi Yodeya platform would welcome my knowledge about Yoda, nor I would get any positive response on my Russian language expertise. And if they then ask me whats wrong with me I had to point in your direction :P

Did anybody watch Mirrors 2?

6:49 AM

@dhein Feel free to do so :) I'll eat them raw for breakfast ;) (No, please don't, I don't want trouble, I'm just getting proud of my account)

@AJ I looked in the mirror this morning, does that count?

No. :P

Mirrors 2 is a 2010 American horror film. It is a sequel to the 2008 film Mirrors. Released by 20th Century Fox in direct-to-video format, the film is written by Matt Venne and is directed by Víctor García. It is available on DVD and Blu-ray Disc. == Plot == Max Matheson (Nick Stahl) is involved in a car accident, that kills his fiancée, Kayla (Jennifer Sipes). Due to the accident, he becomes emotionally disturbed and undergoes psychological treatment with Dr. Beaumont (Ann Mckenzie), making some progress in dealing with the guilt over the accident. To help Max move forward, his father, J...

@Tinkeringbell: I would say depends on what you saw in that mirror. :D I mean "eating them raw for breakfast" might qualify for counting :P

@dhein sssh! that's a secret :)

@AJ: Not sure I just watched the first or the second too. I just remember that most of the movie took place in a big house and something was flying to reach a mirror in the end and.... dunno some years ago.

@AJ Okay, so I've read the article. What's so special about it?

6:54 AM

Did he say its special?:o

Nothing. Just asking.

@AJ Okay. No I haven't seen it. I don't watch a lot of horror movies.

Jarko Dubbeldam

Is anyone here familiar with the command dotnet new?

@dhein No, but he could have had a special reason for mentioning it

@JarkoDubbeldam I now know it exists....

She prefers watching the mirror (sorry '^.^)

Jarko Dubbeldam

6:55 AM

@Tinkeringbell That's probably not good enough :(

@Tinkeringbell: Ah, I see :)

@JarkoDubbeldam Have you tried google? Or are going help vampire here as well ;)

@dhein perfectly fine

Jarko Dubbeldam

I tried google, but I couldn't find what I was looking for

lmgtfy.com/?q=dot+net+new

@JarkoDubbeldam Hmm... ask another SE community?

Jarko Dubbeldam

6:57 AM

yea I know, but since there were a few programmers in here, it was worth a shot

@AJ I watched the first few minutes and it was so scary I stopped. I am a wuss.

Ok, I'll leave you now here, before I will fall completly out of favors :'D So wish you all a good day :)

@Tinkeringbell I was wondering whether if you move the frame in your picture your head will move to the side as well, lol.

@dhein Have a nice day, and see you later! :)

@Jasper We haven't tried yet

Extroverted Main Man

0

Q: "What would you like to eat?" "Anything" How can I stop my friend from replying like that?

In my work, I've made a friend, whom I always go with to lunch. We usually have regular places to eat, with varying frequency. We have at least 6 places to eat, with 2 of them are the most often. Of course, sometimes I got bored of the same place, and I asked him where to eat for lunch. He will ...

friends work-environment eating

Jarko Dubbeldam

7:13 AM

Seems like I found the answer

That was way too hard to google though

The answer is, don't use dotnet new.

cool

Gypsy Spellweaver

@JarkoDubbeldam should you use dotnet old instead?

Jarko Dubbeldam

huehue

sorry, not in the mood

7:38 AM

@JarkoDubbeldam Hmm... hard to google things are never fun. But I'm curious as to what the answer was as well. Maybe you could post it on SE ;)

Then the next person has an easy google search :)

Jarko Dubbeldam

Hmm, I was trying to create a Windows Forms application in .NET/C#

And everything says that in visual studio you have to create a project and select blablabla

But I can't use the full visual studio bc of licensing things, so I want to do it in Visual Studio Code, which doesn't have the option to create projects like that

So I have to use the commandline method using dotnet new.

But Windows forms is not a project option in dotnet new

Solution, just use csc to compile instead of dotnet

Yeah... those are the nice ones, when you are looking to use something in a specific way and nobody tells you you can't

Jarko Dubbeldam

Yeah, but googling this keeps redirecting to Microsoft help pages about the full VS option

I think there may be money involved there..

Jarko Dubbeldam

mebbe

1 hour later…

8:57 AM

I could use a few down and delete votes here: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/a/5000/1599

And should I leave the "Please explain how to do that and why it works?" comment here :P

@Tinkeringbell Sorry, I can only flag.

You can protect your question if you want.

Good enough :)

Jarko Dubbeldam

Hi there, Stack Exchange generally frowns upon one-line answers. Why do you think this approach might be the best? Why not support your answer with sources or own experiences?

@JarkoDubbeldam Yeah, but... should it get attention or not? :P

Jarko Dubbeldam

no lol

8:59 AM

@AJ I thought it needed three heavily downvoted/deleted answers for that?

as a guideline?

ah well, I've protected. Another member can unprotect if I was wrong

@Tinkeringbell What does get her pumped mean?

Jarko Dubbeldam

coitus

oh

Jarko Dubbeldam

exactly

he doesn't even realise that vampires are immune to that...

9:16 AM

@JarkoDubbeldam I'd like her to explain how I should give her D :P

I'm really tempted to comment that I'm not into strap-ons... :P

Extroverted Main Man

9:34 AM

0

Q: How to deal with a casinò night-out

Me and my friends are planning to go on a casinò night-out. We are generally ok with gambling, we have no pathology and we just have fun when we win and , why not, slightly making fon of us when someone lose. We are Italian , and since casinò, except for the Venice one, are kind of illegal, we ...

friends social-event friend-groups

9:50 AM

@Tinkeringbell You just need to flag it as not an answer. I don't see how it answers the question in any way.

@Jasper Well, this one's rude as well :) So I flagged as rude. But yes, flagging as not an answer is sufficient

Doesn't mean I'm not tempted to write 10 thousand snarky replies

Jarko Dubbeldam

Feeding the troll, as much fun as it can be, is probably not the best use for comments

I gave up. After 3 hours of struggling to get this to work: stackoverflow.com/questions/46582847/…

@JarkoDubbeldam I hope you get a good answer soon!

@JarkoDubbeldam I know, but I'm a sort of Hagrid... trolls make good pets :P

10:20 AM

@Tinkeringbell I've flagged it for rude (or abusive).

Great. It's our 5000th post. Our 5000th post is a suggestion to get someone laid.

2

-7

A: How to redirect a real-life help vampire to an alternate source of food... um... assistance?

Get her pumped, she's clearly wanting the D

Jarko Dubbeldam

woops

I'm sorry! but I'm laughing right now :)

Jarko Dubbeldam

Well, that's a good reason to keep going for the 10k

3 hours later…

Jarko Dubbeldam

1:05 PM

@Tinkeringbell Welp, I figured it out eventually

1:16 PM

@JarkoDubbeldam Time to answer your own question ;)

@SQB EnglishStudent isn't here, but he would make a great addition to chat. I think he could learn some things as well (like not feeding the troll).

Jarko Dubbeldam

@Tinkeringbell writing it up now

@Tinkeringbell How is that ~~answer~~ post still there?

How Bacteria Rule Over Your Body – The Microbiome

Not for germophobes.

Jarko Dubbeldam

the thing is, I am so new to the framework that I don't know whether my "workaround" is actually good

@SQB I think there's too little people with 4k rep and deletion privileges to get it removed very quickly

I'll bet it's gone soon tonight.

@JarkoDubbeldam Just wait for the downvotes to arrive then

@Tinkeringbell But flagging as "Rude or Abusive" should be enough, if enough people do it.

1:23 PM

@SQB I think mod's should pick that up and I haven't seen one of those online yet today

Jarko Dubbeldam

@Tinkeringbell nooo D:

Catyja was online in chat just now

@Tinkeringbell whew stackoverflow.com/questions/46582847/…

@JarkoDubbeldam She was possibly woke up by his son.

Jarko Dubbeldam

Possible, I'm not judging or anything

@JarkoDubbeldam Looks good!

Jarko Dubbeldam

1:42 PM

Mhmm, but the fact that it is a patch which in turn requires additional patching makes me feel uneasy

Extroverted Main Man

2:14 PM

0

Q: How to get over nervousness and prepare for meeting significnt other's parents?

I am the kind of person that is a little shy/awkward when first meeting people, but get better over time, the longer I have to warm up to them. The problem is this initial nervousness is quite a bit worse in this case because I will be meeting my significant other's parents for the first time. I ...

conversations awkward-situations relationships socializing

2 hours later…

4:07 PM

Can we talk a look at this question: interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/4992/… - It has no close votes - anyone thought about it at all and whether it's a good fit for this site?

Extroverted Main Man

0

Q: What should I say to someone who spoiled the movie that I intended to watch?

I presume there is not much you can do after somebody spoiled the movie but could we say something that may cause them to think before spoiling. And If you don't think spoiler affects movie watching experience watch this. I'm asking this question in a general sense without citing any specific i...

The title and body don't seem to be asking the same question. The title question is subjective (we're not his friend and can't tell him if he's asking too much of him) and the body question is asking for a diagnosis...

@Catija I missed that question I think. I'm willing to take a long look at it once I'm home. Maybe we should edit the title at least?

@Catija "Is something wrong with me?" seems really broad / asking for psychological help :/

Yeah. I saw it last night and figured it would get handled overnight but I come in this morning and it's not only still there, it has no close votes. I wish I had a way to nudge something into the review queues just to get people to look at it... but I don't. So that means I have to come here or meta and it seems weird to go to meta.

4:16 PM

Well, I've left a close vote as well ... I guess that sometimes happens, that questions slip by unnoticed...

Yeah.. I put a VTC for "too broad" since I don't think there's really a clear goal here. "how can I make more friends" maybe, but even then..

Sure! I can't see them all, either :D That's why I think talking about what people want to do with a post in here is good... if you're not sure (either because there aren't any close votes or because it's new and you're not sure how it fits) post it in here and we can talk about it. I think that's a good thing to do... and if someone disagrees after it's closed, we can take it to meta and point at the discussion here.

Well, I've invited Student93 to chat as well, see if he/she shows up :)

(oops, that isn't possible, low rep)

@Catija? what do you think of my close vote? offtopic, comment listing all the problems?

Is that an okay thing to do?

Or should we just pick one?

4:33 PM

@Tinkeringbell Seems good. I think that it's important to help the OP as much as we can to understand why the question is being closed and how it might be fixed.

Yeah... I mainly wanted to prevent it being opened with only one problem fixed...

I've seen that happening before ...

4:55 PM

can I get a quick straw poll? would "should I tell my SO this mean thing a family member said about him/our relationship" be a bad question?

Are they bendy straws?

Yeah. That would be opinion based in my opinion

haha :)

yeah that's what I was worried about.. I've been waffling on it for a while and just want to put it to rest, lol

I think that it would likely be opinion based but I think that, depending on the level of detail, it might be answerable... can you explain why you think your SO needs this information, for example...

I think you could ask "how do handle a family member saying nasty things about him"

Then we can tell you to tell him, because...

4:57 PM

You could also ask about it in here... nothing is off topic in that sense here.

or don't tell him, take it up with family member, because...

AND IM NEARLY MISSING MY STATION AGAIN!!!

Bye!

oh no! bye :)

hmm so the short version is my sister told me "you could do better".. he's generally aware my family is not supportive, but the new stuff with my sister has really been bugging me :(

I already knew my parents don't like him, but I was really surprised by what she said

:( That's no fun.

Have you generally talked to him about his family not liking him - not necessarily about your sister?

Do they actually say why they don't like him?

yeah, he knows my parents aren't really happy about it

well the main reason my parents gave was that he's divorced, and they didn't like how quickly we got together after our previous relationships

How long have you been together?

5:03 PM

about 2.5 years now

When you say SO, are you married or just living together/dating?

just dating, it's long-distance

...

People are dumb.

we do want to get married and live together, but circumstances

So I'm guessing your family hasn't spent much time around him, then?

5:04 PM

lol

my family relationships are a mess right now

he's visited I think twice

my family doesn't visit me

I live about 7h from parents, and he's a plane flight away from me

... So, what I think I'd recommend is to mention it to him... he needs (I think) to know that he's got an uphill battle with your family. Make sure that he knows that you don't share their concerns but there's a difference between your cousin saying something specific and shitty and your sister or parents generally disliking him or thinking you're better than him. Part of what you might want to do (especially if you are planning to marry) is to find a way to show them that he's a great guy.

But in order to explain why you even need to do this, you will have to tell him what she said.

:( you're probably right but... ugh

I've never known my parents to change their mind on someone their kid was dating

Unless you don't care about what they think... then just ignore them... but they're being dicks.

my sister was engaged previously after dating a guy for 4? years and they STILL made comments behind her back

now she's engaged to my ex, they're super fine with that :D :D :D

after only eight months too. like I said... a mess

@EmC o_O

5:13 PM

@Mithrandir lol thank you. they couldn't fathom why this would bother me and I felt crazy for a while

That is... wow. Just wow. Do they have no sense of awkwardness??

@EmC ewwww

apparently it didn't occur to my (conservative, religious) parents that it may not have been a perfectly chaste relationship, which "changed everything" according to my mother. when I told my sister she just said "yeah I figured, doesn't bother me"!

Oh, right, you asked that question about not wanting to forgive your sister. I'm pretty sure your life is the plot of a rom-com.

yeah... and that's why talking to either "family or ex-lover" would have worked :P

5:19 PM

Sounds like they like your ex more than they like you.... not to be flippant... just... wow.

yeah idk. the wedding is in april and my sister basically said "I expect you to be there smiling in pictures"

which of course makes me want to do the exact opposite, lol

Go on vacation instead.

I like that plan :)

Sounds horrible. You should be exempt from attending and I'm pretty sure all of your friends will understand, even if your family can't.

You should meet your SO and get married the same weekend.

oh yeah, every friend I've told about it immediately says "wtf"

hahah

I keep telling him I just want to elope..

5:24 PM

Do it!

:D

I know people who are married and still doing the long distance thing.

that is hardcore

No rules that you have to cohabitate once you're married. :) though, I'm a big proponent of living together before marriage.

@Catija (do you mean Ash/WE or some people IRL?)

5:26 PM

my manager at work is like that, her husband is stationed halfway across the world. I don't know how she does it!

... you don't really know someone until you live with them.

@Mithrandir both. Military families do it all the time.

I don't know how I feel about living together.. part probably just the conservative upbringing, part I feel like that's the exciting part about getting married? just for me personally, though :)

I have friends who got married and then one of them decided to get an advanced degree somewhere else.

plus I don't exactly have to decide just yet, lol

Hello.

5:29 PM

hi!

\©

What have I done? I'm totally lost. So many topics discussed over here. Haha

You should start reading Dan Savage's column, Savage Love. Required reading for people who want to know how to be a good partner.

Savage Love. ;)

Whatever that means. :)

Or how to have a kinky sex life...

5:31 PM

Ah, so that is what I thought it is.

He's a sex/kink positive advice columnist. Gay guy. Married to a one night stand. Has an adopted kid.

It's not all about kinky stuff. A lot of it is just general advice..

cool, I will have to check it out :)

He has a podcast, too. thestranger.com/savage-love/2017/09/27/25434253/savage-love

Extroverted Main Man

6:24 PM

0

Q: Sick grandparent(s) moved in and are now citing anger and sterss

We're a family of 3, my mom, my dad and I. My dad's father has recently been diagnosed with stage 4 cancer and based on what we know so far there's no chance for a recovery, and not much life is left in him. Both my grandma and grandpa are over 70 years of age. They moved in with us about 3 weeks...

family rudeness conflicts illness grandparents

Henry WH Hack v2.1

Children these days are getting more and more stressful!

6:46 PM

@HenryWHHackv2.1 Yeah. But it's also their parents fault. I can remember my parents not discussing anything in front of me, if I had no need to know.

Our neighboring children know all the gossip about an episode we had with another pair of neighbours (they were 4 and 6 at the time). I only know some basic facts since well, there sometimes were cops visiting our house, and I was 18!

Henry WH Hack v2.1

One example: My cousin 4 years old cry just for someone to come take his tea bottle and put it in the refrigerator. A task that he can do himself in only 30 seconds less.
Also if something falls on the floor he wants someone to take it up for him every when he is very close to the object.
Signs of laziness!

DO IT YOURSELF!

nah, that's stressful :P

Henry WH Hack v2.1

Which?

doing things yourself

Henry WH Hack v2.1

Oh

Do it yourself (DIY) is the method of building, modifying, or repairing things without the direct aid of experts or professionals. Academic research describes DIY as behaviors where "individuals engage raw and semi-raw materials and component parts to produce, transform, or reconstruct material possessions, including those drawn from the natural environment (e.g. landscaping)". DIY behavior can be triggered by various motivations previously categorized as marketplace motivations (economic benefits, lack of product availability, lack of product quality, need for customization), and identity ...

6:57 PM

my little brother would be like that too and it drove me up the wall! fortunately kids usually grow out of it :)

Henry WH Hack v2.1

OK

I'd say I was probably like that too, but apparently my catchphrase as a toddler was "do it MY self!" :P

@EmC Yes! 'Zelluf doen!' in Dutch ;)

My motto (still :P )

nice :D

7:23 PM

> It is a valid answer, although not as useful. Just put a weight on answer like this, and let it sink. No need to delete.

Somebody commented this on an answer that I voted to delete.

-3

A: How do I announce my presence to someone who is not aware of it without frightening them?

In short just try using Verbal Communication. Simply talk with her in a gentle voice which should help you. Usually we overthink in such situations and avoid using simple ways of communication. So just try talking to her directly.

What are the rules for delete voting then?

Is this really "a valid answer"?

commenter is not here, otherwise I would have asked..

hmm. "very low quality" is a delete option, right? and things like one-liners are subject to deletion too

Yeah... so I thought this was low quality, and voted to delete... I guess I shouldn't worry too much then :)

plus, "say something" has already been suggested

We've had discussions about what makes an answer that's good enough. One of those things is explaining why the answer is a good solution and supporting the answer with personal experience... if it's just a one-line answer with no support, it's probably not worth keeping. Feel free to comment to get them to improve it but you can also flag it.

@Catija Well, that's probably where the confusion arises. It's not exactly a one-liner, but it's indeed a.) Something already suggested and b.) very short.

7:38 PM

Yeah, duplicate answers should definitely be removed unless they're posted at the same time (or within a very short window) or explain themselves in vastly different ways. An answer that duplicates another answer and doesn't explain why in a new and interesting way isn't worth holding onto.

@Catija I've left a little comment :)

As far as I can see, there are 2 very similar answers, posted within an hour of each other, and 1 that's different but posted a day earlier, that all mention talking

This one was posted 11 hours after that, so clearly duplicate for me

2 hours later…

Extroverted Main Man

9:21 PM

-1

Q: I want to marry this girl and provide for her but she lives in another country

I have been talking to this girl on the internet for about 9 months, and I really like her. But, we live on opposite sides of the world (well, it feels like it...). We are at the point in our relationship where we are sharing rather intimate pictures smirk and I really want to meet her! Here's th...

relationships online-relationships

@ExtrovertedMainMan no no no no

@ExtrovertedMainMan ...yikes

ugh ugh ugh ugh ugh

mashes VTC button

> how do I make her depend on me

Ewww.

Henry WH Hack v2.1

Some questions here are about people meeting girls.

!!/reboot (stolen smokey command)

I meet a girl today! :D

How can I talk to her?

9:36 PM

You say Hello. I'm Henry. and treat her like a person

@HenryWHHackv2.1 usually your voice works pretty well! :P

@EmC I think my keyboard works better ;P

Henry WH Hack v2.1

I will go like: Hi I'm Henry do you have an Stack Exchange account?
response: What's Stack Exchange
me: Go away!

Oh no

@Mithrandir I will do that.^

(that's impossible to read on mobile, I should file a bug report)

@Mithrandir haha, a very good alternative :)

9:39 PM

The monospace doesn't go onto the next line, it runs off the end of the screen and I can't read it :/

interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/help/badges/55/fanatic

^ The life of a mod on IPS.

lol. congrats!

Henry WH Hack v2.1

I could of gotten it but:

I never get those badges because I forget to go on SE on the weekends..

Henry WH Hack v2.1

I missed some days on the meta.

9:41 PM

@EmC The mobile app helps with that...

@Catija but it doesn't have reviews and stuff like that

@Mithrandir No. But it lets me keep up with questions/comments.

It has no mod tools implementation, either.

@Catija fanatic badge, here I come..

I know *rolls eyes*

Henry WH Hack v2.1

10:07 PM

Eye rolling is rude.

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