English Language & Usage: Multi-Layered Discourse Room

Alraxite

1:00 PM

Also, is being at the same level as Ukraine and Indonesia good or bad?

@Cerberus Well, what's the scale? Is 'moderate proficiency' the second best or the third?

Cerberus

@Alraxite Bad, I imagine.

@Alraxite In the middle.

terdon

Hey! Your map ate Greece!

Mitch

om nom nom nom

Cerberus

I'm sorry, it was hungry.

I imagine Greece would be bright red.

Mitch

@Cerberus That just seems weird. given the colonial influence of English on large parts of africa...like say South Africa.

Robusto

1:05 PM

@AndrewLeach Horrible on Android tablets as well.

Cerberus

@Mitch Um I'm not sure what you mean. Grey = no data.

Alraxite

Even then, I don't think I'd be able to judge where India lies. There are a large number of people who don't even get to go to schools where English is taught. Assuming we're only talking about the ones who do get to, then, well, there's a large variation in the quality of education at various schools...

Cerberus

@Robusto Hmm it's actually not bad on my Android phone, for a web page.

Mitch

@Cerberus Oh. Nevermind.

Cerberus

@Alraxite Right, your circles are probably not representative of the country.

But honestly, I'm not sure I entirely trust that map.

In my experience, people in France speak better English than in Spain.

Alraxite

1:07 PM

@Cerberus Well, if it is bad, then it definitely should be at a higher level.

Mitch

but still.

Cerberus

Yeah.

But I have never been to Ukraine or Indonesia...

Robusto

@Cerberus Well, but you can't reply to messages, etc. And the starboard overlaps the messages, which sucks ass.

Matt Эллен

"Countries Cerberus has spoken English in"

Mitch

@Cerberus bettern Russia or China

Cerberus

1:09 PM

@Robusto The no-reply thing is indeed annoying.

@MattЭллен I could make such a map!

terdon

@Cerberus Probably not actually. It has a relatively decent level of English. Not as good as you northrern types but better by far than any of the southern countries.

Matt Эллен

@Cerberus and colour code it by your level of proficiency :D

(ignoring typos)

Cerberus

Oh, and Turkey is indeed worse than you might expect. It is a very modern country, and Istanbul is very cosmopolitan; and yet this opera singer I met there didn't speak a word of English.

terdon

@Cerberus ummm... In mine they each speak it as bad as each other.

Cerberus

@Mitch Yes, much better. Especially than in China!

Mitch

1:11 PM

@MattЭллен How can Scotland be magenta? At best red like France.

terdon

@Cerberus And there he goes again, extrapolating from 1 to infinity.

Robusto

@Cerberus Fortunately there are few noteworthy operas in English.

Cerberus

@terdon Hmm are you sure? In my experience, it was more like Spain. And I went to Chersonissos and Athens, so...

Mitch

@Cerberus There are few works in English, and those there are are of Englsh 'quality' (like their cuisine).

Matt Эллен

@Mitch aye jimmy, it'll be down tae all the sassenachs coming back

terdon

1:12 PM

@Cerberus Of course I'm sure :) I've lived in both countries for years after all!

Mitch

@MattЭллен What?

Cerberus

@terdon How odd! It is true that I only went to Granada and Paris on my own; in rural France, I always was with my parents, who speak French with the locals.

Robusto

@MattЭллен Aye, but yer lad Andy just got flushed oot o' Wimbledon.

terdon

All Greeks (and certainly the younger generations) speak English. Since movies/TV are not dubbed, there is a constant contact with the language. Unlike Spain.Italy and France.

Mitch

@Cerberus French are reluctant to speak English.

terdon

1:13 PM

^^

Cerberus

@terdon That was just the most egregious example: I would have expected an opera singer to be the most proficient kind of person. There were many, many other young people who also didn't speak a word of English.

terdon

Especially in Paris.

Cerberus

@Robusto Hmm Purcell...

Andrew Leach

@Robusto He's not our lad any more. He's Scottish now.

Matt Эллен

@Robusto didnae even make it tae the world cup

Cerberus

1:13 PM

@terdon Right, that does help.

terdon

Can't speak for Turkey but you'd have to really search to find a Greek under 40 or 50 who was unable to communicate in English.

Robusto

@terdon See my and @Cerb's personal anecdotes contradicting this.

Cerberus

@Mitch Not in my limited experience, actually. I begin in French and they switch to English.

Mitch

In Paris they resist out of annoyance and pride. In the rest of the country it is humility

Cerberus

@terdon In Paris.

terdon

1:14 PM

Oh? You have a statistical sample of 1.00? That changes everything.

Mitch

In the US out of ignorance!

Cerberus

@terdon We found several, and in touristy areas...

Robusto

@AndrewLeach Well, but isn't every Brit named Andrew a Scot?

Mitch

@terdon because it is plural

Cerberus

Of course it's just anecdotal.

I'm just noting how curious it is that my impressions do not always match the map.

Alraxite

1:15 PM

Almost every friend of mine from an online gaming community speaks Google Translatian English.

Cerberus

Haha.

Mitch

@Alraxite I am polyglot fluent in google translate.

Cerberus

It is true, however, that the Dutch speak good English. Or at least a lot of it!

terdon

@Cerberus That is surprising. Also, I assume that was not in a city, things are different in the country.

Andrew Leach

@Robusto Ha! No.

Mitch

1:16 PM

@Cerberus and scandinavia too

Cerberus

Even people aged 60 with little education living in the country will be able to have a basic conversation here.

terdon

As a general rule, your averagely educated Greek speaks some English.

Cerberus

@terdon Chersonissos, Iraklion, Athens, are what my subconscious bases its impressions on. Places where I would expect the level of English to be far above average.

Robusto

@AndrewLeach Not even at heart? Not even a wee bit?

Cerberus

@Mitch Sure. But I never left the aeroports of Stockholm and Copenhagen, so I wouldn't know.

@terdon OK noted.

Andrew Leach

1:19 PM

@Robusto No. Wee means something completely different to me.

terdon

And I tend to speak about Athens. Typical capital dweller egocentricity.

Robusto

@AndrewLeach Whee!

@terdon Are there other cities in Greece? I wasn't aware.

Cerberus

Look how different this map is from the other one.

It is closer to what I would expect. Greece is indeed doing as well as France.

Estonia is suddenly doing much worse than Holland, as opposed to the other map. I have to say I was surprised to see it ranked that high.

Mitch

@Cerberus Oh. The airports are high security ghettos for interning English speakers. Beyond the razor wire fences are the unwashed bokmal speakers

Cerberus

@Mitch Ugh, not unwashed Bokmal! Eww.

French.

French is, alas, very limited in Holland.

Mitch

1:26 PM

@Cerberus why does Switzerland insist on not being involved? So emo.

Cerberus

It's the EU only.

Mitch

So EMU

Robusto

@Mitch That's their cloak of secrecy you see. They're very much involved.

terdon

@Robusto Not really, no. A couple of villages here and there, but filled with hicks and the local analog of rednecks.

Cerberus

Does the EMU still exist?

Mitch

1:27 PM

!!wiki emu

Jarvis the Bot

Emu

The emu (, sometimes ; Dromaius novaehollandiae) is the largest bird native to Australia and the only extant member of the genus Dromaius. It is the second-largest extant bird in the world by height, after its ratite relative, the ostrich. There are three subspecies of emus in Australia. The emu is common over most of mainland Australia, although it avoids heavily populated areas, dense forest, and arid areas. The soft-feathered, brown, flightless birds reach up to in height. They have long thin necks and legs. Emus can travel great distances at a fast, economical trot and, if neces...

Matt Эллен

!!wiki rod hull and emu

Jarvis the Bot

@MattЭллен No result found

Mitch

@Cerberus Yes

Jarvis the Bot

Rod Hull

Rodney Stephen Hull (13 August 1935 – 17 March 1999), better known as Rod Hull, was a popular entertainer on British television in the 1970s and 1980s. He rarely appeared without Emu, a mute, highly aggressive arm-length puppet of the flightless emu bird. Career Hull was born in the Isle of Sheppey, Kent, England in 1935. He attended Delemark Road School and the County Technical School, Sheerness. After national service with the RAF, he qualified as an electrician. He married his first wife Sandra in 1958; they had two daughters, Deborah and Danielle. His first job in television was a...

Mitch

1:27 PM

@terdon hick = redneck.

Cerberus

@Mitch Wrong spelling...

Robusto

@Mitch Not quite. You can be a hick without being a redneck. Well, maybe you can't, but for others it's possible.

terdon

@Mitch Not entirely is it? I would think you can get non-redneck hicks. I'd say that all hicks are rednecks but not all rednecks are hicks.

Robusto

What are hicks in Holland? Hoeks?

Mitch

@Cerberus "Yas"?

Matt Эллен

1:29 PM

@Robusto boer?

Mitch

@Robusto Nope. I can't.

terdon

You can have black hicks for example but they certainly couldn't be rednecks.

Cerberus

Economic and Monetary Union of the European Union

The Economic and Monetary Union (EMU) is an umbrella term for the group of policies aimed at converging the economies of all member states of the European Union at three stages. Both the 18 eurozone states and the 10 non-euro states are EMU members. A Member State however needs to comply and be a part of the "third EMU stage", before being able to adopt the euro currency; and as such the "third EMU stage" has also become largely synonymous with the eurozone. All Member States of the European Union, except Denmark and the United Kingdom, have committed themselves by treaty to join the "t...

Mitch

@terdon True, Some rednecks are getting suburbanized.

Robusto

@Cerberus That image looks like something straight out of I Ching.

RegDwigнt

1:30 PM

Dear next person to upvote an a vs. an question: I will personally come to your house and bludgeon you to death with a giant N.

Cerberus

@Robusto Umm boeren, provincialen,

Robusto

@RegDwigнt You're so censorious. We were hoping to break 1,000 such questions before the new year.

Alraxite

They speaking Google Translate English is true actually. I found that the kind of English constructs they usually use in chat is what GT usually spits out. I conjecture, soon we'll have a large portion of the world speaking Google Translatian.

RegDwigнt

Jun 23 at 14:34, by RegDwigнt

There should be rep points for using the search feature.

Cerberus

@Robusto Oh, why?

RegDwigнt

1:31 PM

Jun 23 at 14:34, by RegDwigнt

Right now you get rep for not searching the site.

Mitch

@Robusto crisis = danger + opportnunity

Robusto

@Cerberus Almost looks like two trigrams.

RegDwigнt

@Robusto you can break 2000 as far as I'm concerned. Just do not upvote them, ffs.

Cerberus

Hmm not sure what those are.

terdon

@Cerberus http%3A%2F%2Fupload.wikimedia.org%2Fwikipedia%2Fcommons%2Fthumb%2F4%2F44%2FKing_‌Wen_%2528I_Ching%2529.png%2F270px-King_Wen_%2528I_Ching%2529.png

Damn

Matt Эллен

1:31 PM

we should phase out the a spelling of the indefinite article, and simple say an is pronounced /ə/ or /eɪ/ when not before a vowel sound.

Cerberus

But I think that's a graph of the seats in the European Parliament.

Robusto

@RegDwigнt How about OVER 9000?

Alraxite

@terdon That's even worse.

terdon

RegDwigнt

@Robusto downvotes on each dupe? Count me in!

Cerberus

1:32 PM

Yay!

So what is that?

Mitch

@Alraxite what's worse, the more people use it and write it, the more google will be using that text to drive it's learning algorithms, and then it will become the new standard for translation.

terdon

@Alraxite Yeah, but I didn't want to edit again since Cerb gets pinged each time I do.

RegDwigнt

@Cerberus that is beards.

terdon

@Cerberus I ching patterns.

Robusto

@terdon You live in the best of all possible hexagrams.

Alraxite

1:33 PM

@Mitch ikr

RegDwigнt

Robusto

I Ching

The I Ching, also known as the Classic of Changes, Book of Changes, Zhouyi and Yijing, is one of the oldest of the Chinese classic texts. The book contains a divination system comparable to Western geomancy or the West African Ifá system; in Western cultures and modern East Asia, it is still widely used for this purpose. Traditionally, the I Ching and its hexagrams were thought to pre-date recorded history, and based on traditional Chinese accounts, its origins trace back to the 3rd and 2nd millennia BCE. Modern scholarship suggests that the earliest layers of the text may date from t...

Mitch

@terdon if you cross your eyes, you can see the Mona Lisa.

RegDwigнt

"Ching" is just Chinese for "robot".

Cerberus

@terdon Very scientific.

terdon

1:34 PM

@Mitch You too? I thought it was just me.

Mitch

@terdon I ching dead people.

terdon

@Cerberus Tell me about it. I spent three years with a woman who used it seriously. And she was an MD/PhD FFS!

Cerberus

Haha seriously!

In what field?

terdon

@Mitch Keep your ching up.

Robusto

The Ka Ching is the monetized version of the I Ching.

4

terdon

1:35 PM

@Cerberus Medicine and Neuroscience. Dammit.

Cerberus

Oh, no.

Especially neuroscience.

Mitch

@terdon starts to distrust "educated" people

terdon

Yeah... Well, she did accept that it may just be a nice way of getting stuff out of your subconscious. When pressed.

Cerberus

I wouldn't have the patience to date people who believe in supernatural things, i.e. things that are counterfactual.

Mitch

@terdon Like French Press.

terdon

1:36 PM

@Mitch Starts? I wish. That boat sailed when I first got into high school.

Cerberus

@terdon Ugh.

Mitch

@terdon bettern uneducated

Robusto

@terdon Everyone I have ever known who's been involved with astrology or tarot cards or the I Ching has been female.

Not sure what that says, but . . .

Cerberus

I have to admit, though, that my current date partakes in acupuncture therapy...

Matt Эллен

Philip K Dick was into IChing

Mitch

1:37 PM

@Cerberus what about made up stuff, like the news?

Matt Эллен

he wasn't female

Robusto

@MattЭллен Never met him.

Matt Эллен

he wasn't exactly sane, though

terdon

Well, it's true that the I Ching is different. At least there's some text and some direct choice by you which suggests it might be useful as a way of finding out what you really feel.

Cerberus

@Mitch As long as one is critical...

Mitch

1:37 PM

@Robusto It says that guys can't read.

RegDwigнt

What about Lee Ching?

Robusto

@Mitch Well, but that's obvious.

terdon

@RegDwigнt You mean Leer Ching?

Matt Эллен

@RegDwigнt from torrents?

Mitch

@Cerberus That could work, where 'could' means hypothetically, but it doesn't.

RegDwigнt

1:38 PM

@terdon that is so Unchinese I am not even going to comment how Unchinese it is.

Cerberus

To what extent is acupuncture a placebo, and to what extent is it possible that there is some real effect? Of course the theories behind it are hogwash, but that doesn't necessarily mean it does nothing...

terdon

Woah! @Cerberus acupuncture is a very different thing! That does actually work.

RegDwigнt

@MattЭллен more like veins, but if you insist...

Cerberus

Are you sure?

terdon

The descriptions are pretty much hogwash but the effect is certainly not.

Mitch

1:39 PM

@Robusto Yeah of course, since you're reading that, you're a woman.

Cerberus

Do you happen to run an acupuncture practice?

Mitch

@Cerberus It is scientific in the sense that it has a plausible scientific basis (stimulation of nerve endings affets pain control) is testable. But It has been tested and it is crap.

Cerberus

Oh? Crap in what way?

Mitch

@terdon The effect is certainly placebo.

Cerberus

Terdon seems to disagree...

terdon

1:41 PM

@Cerberus Pretty much. Looking up some refeernces now.

@Mitch I don't see why.

Cerberus

Hmm...

At least homoeopathy is real.

Mitch

@Cerberus controlling for placebo effect, it has no effect at all.

Cerberus

waits

RegDwigнt

My acupuncture practice is run by Scrat Ching and Scree Ching.

Cerberus

@Mitch Hm OK, but that would seem to be hard to control...

@RegDwigнt Mine by Pree K'ching.

Mitch

1:42 PM

@Cerberus That is questionably scientific because (forgetting for the moment testablility) it is not plausible that a smaller concentration has a greater effect. But testing has been done and it's crap.

RegDwigнt

The only one who could ever teach me was the son of Pree Ching.

Mitch

Yes he does.

RegDwigнt

Which is very unusual, I would have expected his brother Tea Ching to be better at it.

Cerberus

@Mitch Umm "questionably scientific": it's just counter to science, period. Not even worth looking at.

Mitch

@Cerberus It has scientific overtones (it is testable) if you ignore the theory.

terdon

1:44 PM

@Mitch Not crap. I've been reading some abstracts and it does seem to be inconclusive but not demonstrably placebo either (from what I see).,

Cerberus

Except that some things sold as homoeopathic are really not it, but some plant extract that does have real molecules in it.

terdon

This is interesting though, it sure feels wonderful. Hmm, need to look deeper.

Cerberus

@Mitch Prayer also has scientific "overtones", then.

terdon

Homeopathy is crap, that's different.

Cerberus

@terdon This was about homoeopathy, which is unquestionably nonsense.

Matt Эллен

1:45 PM

homeopathy and prayer: as effective as placebo since 1785

Mitch

@Cerberus Yes, and is testable, but the theory behind it is well that is almost by defnition magical thinking.

Cerberus

@MattЭллен Hah, now that you mention it, h. is very old.

Mitch

@MattЭллен before then it was the dark ages of just closing yuour eyes and wishing real hard.

Matt Эллен

:D I made up the date btw

Mitch

@MattЭллен You used your intuition which is just as good.

terdon

1:46 PM

There was a great paper where they had a group of monks or nuns or something pray for one group of terminally ill patients and not pray for another. Turns out, the ones that were prayed for fared slightly worse!

Matt Эллен

lol

Andrew Leach

@terdon Too many variables.

Mitch

@terdon That's unethical! What if prayer worked, then you'd be depriving the unprayered for. Those monsters!

Cerberus

@Mitch Yes, both the theory and the practical procedure are 100% nonsense. I'm just not sure whether the actual physical processes of acupuncture are 100% empty or not.

@terdon ...and that says something about research that is too quick to jump to conclusions based on small differences...

Not that research, but other research.

@Mitch And vice versa.

Mitch

Sticking a needle in you might (that is theoretically) modify pain sensors, but to actually cure you of anything, there's no hypothesized mechanism.

Alraxite

1:48 PM

@Mitch Tbh, I don't they think those learned in the arts of GT wind up being the ones who teach GT. I think GT sometimes asks you to do some survey on the quality of its translations, which is how it 'improves' its algorithms, but it does so only on the translations which are in your language.

Mitch

@Cerberus Yeah, they should stop praying immediately since they know it hurts people.

Cerberus

@Mitch You can be actually cured of psychiatric disorders...

terdon

@Cerberus Oh they didn't reach any conclusion! The differences were statistically insignificant. The trend was that the unprayed for fared better.

Cerberus

@Mitch Yes, or pray to the giant turtle in the sky instead.

terdon

By the way @Mitch I've found at least one paper (a meta analysis) suggesting that:

CONCLUSION:

Acupuncture is an appropriate adjunctive treatment for chemotherapy-induced nausea/vomiting, but additional studies are needed. For other symptoms, efficacy remains undetermined owing to high ROB among studies. Future research should focus on standardizing comparison groups and treatment methods, be at least single-blinded, assess biologic mechanisms, have adequate statistical power, and involve multiple acupuncturists.

ncbi.nlm.nih.gov.gate1.inist.fr/pubmed/23341529

Andrew Leach

1:50 PM

What's ROB?

Cerberus

@terdon Right. It's just that, in some papers, they have very small difference, which may or may not be significant, that they base tentative suggestions on.

Mitch

@Cerberus OK, sure. And fear of pain from a needle on that particular location as opposed to another might be significant for dealing with a phobia or OCD.

terdon

@AndrewLeach Risk of bias.

Basically they're saying "Well, maybe, it may well help, can't be sure though"

Cerberus

@Mitch Yes, it is possible.

terdon

That's what most of them seem to be saying.

Andrew Leach

1:51 PM

@terdon That was money well spent, then.

terdon

@AndrewLeach Well that's often the best you can do.

> CONCLUSION:

Acupuncture should be considered for symptom management where there are limited treatment options, using current peer-reviewed guidelines and clinical reasoning. Much of the primary research reported in reviews is innovative and indicates potential benefit for people with cancer-related symptoms. The complexity of acupuncture as an intervention needs to be acknowledged in future research designs and when reviewing research findings. An iterative approach using adequate interventions, appropriate outcome measures and adherence to reporting standards is required to evaluate the…

Cerberus

How can you do a blind test with needles?

terdon

^^ ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/23868190

Matt Эллен

@Cerberus make the needles wear blindfolds

Cerberus

What if the blindfolds fall off?

They'd have to be tiny.

Mitch

1:52 PM

@Cerberus blindfold? "I might stick a needle in you or not. Did you feel that? No? OK How about that? No? how about ... AUGH!"

Matt Эллен

then the experiment is invalid and all participants must be killed

2

Cerberus

@Mitch Haha exactly.

@MattЭллен Hahaha yesss!! I like.

Mitch

@MattЭллен and disposed of anonymously. You know how I know that? I've never heard about it. QED.

terdon

Anyway, I thought acupuncture was much more clear cut, turns out the jury is out on it.

Matt Эллен

@Mitch QED!

terdon

1:54 PM

>CONCLUSIONS:

As a summary of the current available research, the network meta-analysis results indicate that acupuncture can be considered as one of the more effective physical treatments for alleviating osteoarthritis knee pain in the short-term. However, much of the evidence in this area of research is of poor quality, meaning there is uncertainty about the efficacy of many physical treatments.

Andrew Leach

Files away for reference when knee gets painful again

Cerberus

Frankly, I haven't seen anything so far that says it has some effect that really cannot be ascribed to placebo.

Mitch

@terdon Placebo effect is fairly well established and has its place in medicine as pain control. That's about it. You can give a patient sugar pills, and tell them "Dude, this is a placebo, it is only a sugar pill but if you take it everyday, then you may get some pain relief". That totally works...on people who are psychologically disposed to 'suggestion'.

Cerberus

He knows.

I think.

Unless he is really a she. I haven't seen a picture of either of you.

Mitch

@AndrewLeach Protip: don't stick the needle in your knee. Trust me.

Cerberus

1:56 PM

What if you push it harder?

Mitch

AUGH!

terdon

@Mitch I know what the placebo effect is. However, of the 10 or so literature meta studies I glanced at, none could conclude that acupuncture was a placebo.

Robusto

@Mitch I've never actually met myself.

terdon

@Cerberus Yes you have! That's me in my avatar right there.

Even the bit of me that defines my gender.

Mitch

@Robusto Meeting yourself is overrated. You already know the punchline to most of your own jokes.

terdon

1:59 PM

@Mitch So do we. Unfortunately.

:P

Mitch

@terdon shuts eyes

@terdon haha... wait, whut?

terdon

Know the punchlines to most of @Robusto's jokes :)

@terdon Your guitar?

@Cerberus Obviously.

OK.

2:02 PM

Huh, found a study claiming that acupuncture works as a treatment of irritable bowel syndrome. Written by Chinese authors but published in a peer reviewed journal:

ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/pubmed/?term=24587665

> Acupuncture exhibits clinically and statistically significant control of IBS symptoms.

Admittedly most research on the topic seems to have been performed by Chinese groups but they would be particularly interested in it.

Robusto

May 9 at 16:11, by Robusto

I had my cards read. Also my I Ching read, and my horoscope. Back in the day when that was called "foreplay" . . .

terdon

@Robusto Still is. Sadly.

Robusto

@terdon Hey, don't knock foreplay. It's a useful precursor to sex.

terdon

And I'm all for it! As long as it doesn't involve horoscopes or chings.

Robusto

You don't always get to make those decisions.

2:11 PM

@RegDwigнt Probably my all time favorite Python song that :)

Robusto

2:27 PM

@terdon Better than "I'm a Lumberjack" or "Always Look On The Bright Side"?

Johan Larsson

Always Look On The Bright Side is decent

There is a false rumor that the guy who sang it committed suicide

RegDwigнt

Eric Idle?

False indeed.

Johan Larsson

dunno, don't remember the name

Robusto

I think the only Python who's no longer with us is Graham Chapman. But I could be wrong.

RegDwigнt

@Robusto they have way too many excellent songs. Monty Python Sings is the British answer to Thriller or Carmina Burana. Every number a hit.

Robusto

2:31 PM

Ayup.

Johan Larsson

I should give python another chance, have always found their humor mildly amusing to annoying

Robusto

Hey, they named a programming language after the team. That doesn't cut any ice with you?

RegDwigнt

90% of everything is crap.

Watch the other ten.

Johan Larsson

@Robusto not sure

RegDwigнt

@Robusto not for as long as it's chewing on my dog.

> With profuse thanks to subsequent and instructive comments

I want to cry.

> I elucidated my explanation; it's out of the brackets now

Robusto

2:35 PM

Here's reality for you, on a percentage basis:

96-100% = really good
86-95% = good
78-85% = not bad
66-77% = crap
below 66% = kill it with fire
below 25% = kill it with fire and find everything it's ever touched and kill that with fire too

RegDwigнt

See, that's the problem. The worst stuff makes the most work.

Matt Эллен

but we live in a holistic universe. everything has touched everything else!

Robusto

@MattЭллен I don't make the rules.

Matt Эллен

gets the matches

Robusto

@MattЭллен You can start with country music.

Matt Эллен

2:39 PM

I suppose they have a lot of dry hay. They'll go up fast

Robusto

Also polkas. Don't forget those. And what the hell, toss @RegDwigнt's accordion onto the pyre while you're at it.

Apr 8 '11 at 3:14, by Robusto

________________________________________________
Q: What's the definition of perfect pitch?
A: When you toss a banjo in the garbage and it hits an accordion.

Apr 8 '11 at 3:15, by Robusto

Q: What's the difference between an oboe and a bassoon?
A: You can hit a baseball further with a bassoon.

KitFox

room topic changed to English Language & Usage: on the bleeding edge of modern tongues (no tags)

Andrew Leach

Never lick an envelope flap.

Robusto

What, free restrooms again? What are we, communists?

Andrew Leach

Nothing stopping you paying if you want to.

Robusto

2:49 PM

@AndrewLeach See my note about A Midsummer Night's Dream and the antics of fairies therein.

Matt Эллен

It's my toilet and I'll pay if I want to

Robusto

@AndrewLeach I'm more concerned about the free-flowing urine drying up our revenue stream.

Matt Эллен

capture the urine, evaporate the water and sell the urea as fertiliser

Robusto

@MattЭллен NO U

Andrew Leach

Yes. Please feel free to provide a contradictory answer to mine :-) Although I think when the expression is used nowadays it is sarcastic. That may be due to a misunderstanding or misreading, or even not reading at all.

Mitch

2:51 PM

@AndrewLeach How do you... do it then?

Andrew Leach

I lick the flap, carefully. But many who are more cautious use one of those sponge thingies.

Robusto

When you send email, if you lick the flap you're doing it wrong.

Andrew Leach

Oh. That's what's wrong with it.

Mitch

stops sending mail

RegDwigнt

@Robusto bayan.

Mitch

2:57 PM

wait... what's this 'mail that you speak of? Is it like email but where flaps are involved?

Robusto

@RegDwigнt Wevs.

RegDwigнt

I wish it were an accordion. Much easier for a piano player.

Though also a much smaller range.

cornbread ninja 麵包忍者

do you think you can try / do you think you can try / do you think you can try

Oh, it's 10:00, not 8:05.

RegDwigнt

Think or think not, there is no be.

Robusto

@cornbreadninja麵包忍者 Ah, the Grape.

But I think it's "do you think you could try" . . .

cornbread ninja 麵包忍者

3:00 PM

@Robusto metrolyrics agrees with you.

Can you change my line, as room owner?

Robusto

My ears agree with me.

@cornbreadninja麵包忍者 No.

cornbread ninja 麵包忍者

Lame.

Happy 3rd of July.

RegDwigнt

I am off to mute commies.

cornbread ninja 麵包忍者

Silence them real good.

!!I wish you were still called KitSox.

Matt Эллен

apparently Jarvis disagrees

!!do you wish?

Jarvis doesn't wish

cornbread ninja 麵包忍者

3:06 PM

!!KitSox or Jarvis

Ach! I killed her!

Matt Эллен

well, you are a ninja

cornbread ninja 麵包忍者

in Sandbox on Stack Overflow Chat, 11 secs ago, by Caprica Six

@cornbreadninja Jarvis

Matt Эллен

?!

Robusto

!!Jarvis or KitSox

cornbread ninja 麵包忍者

I asked Caprica Six in teh Sandbox.

she's gone / Oh I / Oh I / I better learn how to face it

Robusto

3:11 PM

then you can't help me, not all you guys / or all you girls with alla your sweet talk

cornbread ninja 麵包忍者

►

tchrist

Your pond smells because you allowed planktonic algae to grow unchecked in it. It grows in excess because you don't have enough fish and bacteria, other whatnots to eat it. They grew because you thought was cute to allow ducks in it whose poop encouraged its growth further. Then the fermentation and hydrogen sulfide generated started killing the bacteria and little tadpoles and the fish that were supposed to eat the algae. Now you have mini-global warming catastrophe in your backyard pond that maintains a disastrous toxic stinky cycle. — Blessed Geek 12 hours ago

cornbread ninja 麵包忍者

Have a slice of pizza.

Matt Эллен

toodle pip!

terdon

@Robusto Yeah, because of the kiddies singing "Every sperm is sacred" in them angelic voices. Priceless.

Robusto

3:24 PM

Isn't that precious.

terdon

And the segue into the protestant skit "We can have sex whenever we want!" "Really? Why don't we then?"

Robusto