Once a week we have team meetings that are scheduled during lunch which the company buys (irrelevant to me since I bring my own lunch anyway). I have no problem with the timing, but I find it insanely frustrating when people talk and eat at the same time. Obviously people try not to talk and chew...
@SolarMike - in many places, startup employees would be salaried without a firm distinction between company and break time and without time being precisely tracked at all. If the asker were in a jurisdiction where salaried employees are legally entitled to an inviolate lunch break, or working in an hourly capacity, they would likely have mentioned so. Similarly, if the issue where that they needed their lunch break to run an errand, or even had a personal habit of going outside for sunshine (or if it were their choice, a cigarette). The issue raised in this question is none of those things.
So you want to cancel the meeting because you can't stand the sound of chewing/people talking while eating. I completely understand your feelings, but you're asking the wrong question here. Canceling the meeting is unreasonable, you should be asking what to do about coping with your pet peeve.
Alternative viewpoint: "How do I ask that the rest of my team members give up a workplace perk (company-provided lunch) because I am uncomfortable listening to people talk while they eat?"
@Stobor I don't read this as requiring anyone to give up a workplace perk (company-provided lunch). It's asking whether meetings could be scheduled at some other time than when they're enjoying that perk. And that's entirely reasonable. Holding a meeting while people are eating is just rude.
Not entirely serious, so a comment instead of an answer: Make the lunch available after the meeting! First, there is nothing for them to eat while talking. Second, the meeting itself will probably be far more efficient, and a lot shorter!
Personally I would talk to HR first. Some managers are just lonely and schedule meeting during lunch time because they can't bear to eat alone. I had a boss like that once. Talk to HR, ask what the policy actually is about lunch breaks. I know if I had DAILY meetings during lunch time, I would get tired of it pretty quick. Break time is supposed to be YOUR time. You NEED that time during the day to stay sane and relax. Your manager shouldn't be taking that away from you.
@rigs I'm pretty sure there is a diagnosis for getting so severely annoyed by such things. In this case, you may be able to get an actual medical diagnosis for this. Regardless your reactions are not normal, most people do not experience what you experience here.
@opa are you basing that on some data or your own personal experience? I also get irritated when I hear people loudly chewing, and I think that annoyance is fairly common. We have norms around table manners for a reason.
@opa You cannot diagnose a medical condition based on the fact that this person has a very common distaste for not liking poor table manners. OPs reaction is not "not normal". It's just not shared by you.
@thumbtackthief Some small studies show that people with misophonia generally have strong negative feelings, thoughts, and physical reactions to specific sounds, which the literature calls "trigger sounds". These sounds are apparently usually soft, but can be loud. One study found that around 80% of the sounds were related to the mouth (eating, slurping, chewing or popping gum, whispering, etc.), and around 60% were repetitive. A visual trigger may develop related to the trigger sound.[1][3] It also appears that a misophonic reaction can occur in the absence of an actual sound.[1]
@opa Yes I know all that--I actually do suffer from misophonia, for what it's worth. You just can't say that everyone who doesn't like hearing loud chewing suffers from that illness, unless you have some sort of medical training you're not talking about. All cats have four legs. Not everything with four legs is a cat.
"People with stomach cancer often experience nausea. I am experiencing nausea. Therefore I have stomach cancer."
@thumbtackthief In this case it has four legs, fur, whiskers, slit eyes, cat ears, cat face, cat tail, cat movements etc... But sure, maybe somehow it isn't a cat, only a biologist could tell us if a cat was a cat.
@LightnessRacesinOrbit Indeed, it's not an absolute that rescheduling the meeting would require rescheduling/cancelling the lunch. However, in my experience, it's likely that the only reason that the company is paying for the lunch in the first place is because of the meeting. No lunchtime meeting = no need for the company to make up for it by paying for lunch. If your company is the kind which treats its employees to lunch on a regular basis without the need for a meeting, then in that situation I agree that they are independent questions.
@thumbtackthief While a dislike for eating noises or talking while eating might not be uncommon, OP states that he cannot focus and sometimes needs to leave the room. That is not a normal reaction to having a dislike to some behaviour. A dislike is typically tolerable, if it affects you so strongly you can no longer function properly that is at least out of the norm - whether a medical condition is another question.
@thumbtackthief Opa never said that rigs has misophonia, just that it is something that exists (and that getting a professional diagnosis might be worthwhile). So, instead: "People with stomach cancer often experience nausea. I am experiencing frequent nausea. Therefore I should consult a Doctor, who can diagnose whether or not I have stomach cancer - just to be safe"... (You also base it being a "normal" reaction on you also having it - and then admit to having misophonia yourself. "Hey I get nausea too, it's perfectly normal. Full disclosure though, I actually have stomach cancer.")
I generally get my hackles raised when people call each other "not normal". It's common to dislike listening to people talk and eat at the same time. Nonetheless, please don't @ me, because I really couldn't care less.
In a restaurant on gets distracted for a lot of reason other than other people chewing, and having to write notes is difficult. Especially if the place is not a posh place I also expect that there is not a reserved room for the meeting, so maybe some arguments can't be raised.
On the other hand if this is a truly informal meeting, but I don't think so from the description, it could work to share some infos.
Discussion on question by rigs: How c…
Discussion on question by rigs: How c…