I’m doing my masters (while working full-time) and one of my professors from last semester, who is teaching my class this semester as well, always asks me, “Did you get your husband to do your homework?” He also asks me if I'm married before giving me feedback. I wish he would just give me the fe...
I think you are being generous about his motives. Of course, you can't really know them. And, I don't understand why liberal v conservative has any bearing on this.
I deleted my answer as it was written before the edit. I think my answer was correct, but it was not my intention to get in an argument with OP, and Spark's answer is excellent and covers everything important.
"Sexual Harassment" does not only mean sexual advances. He is implying that he thinks the work must be done by a man because he thinks a woman could not do it. That is definitely sexual harassment!
@KamiKaze - I disagree. It is harassment creating a hostile work environment based on the sex of the person being harassed. That it (supposedly) is not about 'sex' is beside the point.
@JonCuster It is sexist, inappropriate and also demeaning. He NEEDS to stop, especially after been told to do so. But to be sexual harassment for me it lacks both parts of the word at least from my understanding. There is no power play, thread, constant fear, predatory behaviour what ever to qualify for real harassment. Also there is no sexual (in regard of sexualisation) in this behaviour. As long as a inappropiate remark at the beginning of the conversation is everything. It should not be classified the same as the much worse things that do qualify. This would be an insult for victims.
@user247327 the precise definition of "sexual harassment" varies by state (it would be here) but it clearly meets the federal definition of discrimination. In fact, if this is US public university all must follow the federal guideline which basically states all "shall be permitted to work, study and participate in educational programs receiving federal funding or services in an environment free from any form of illegal discrimination, including race, color, religion, age, disability, sex, national origin,marital status,[...] except as otherwise permitted by law." (emp mine)
So, based on above comment, is this a public or private university?
It's kind of painful to see how much energy you (and I guess your conservative friends) are putting into defending/justifying this awful behavior. Good luck.
@KamiKaze - In the US, the EEOC page on Sexual Harassment (eeoc.gov/laws/types/sexual_harassment.cfm) includes: "Harassment does not have to be of a sexual nature, however, and can include offensive remarks about a person’s sex. For example, it is illegal to harass a woman by making offensive comments about women in general."
Grad student: You said "I'm very socially awkward," but it sounds like your professor is extremely socially awkward. You have difficulties picking up on queues, so you "think it might be a joke," but based on what you've said it does not sound like a joke. People try to disguise awkward statements as jokes, but when they keep repeating something like this, there is likely more to it. Even if you don't think there are any sexual or at least romantic motives, there probably are. He might just be trying to find out if you're available, or maybe it's worse. But I doubt it's an honest joke.
I'm a happily married liberal. Despite what some would have us think, "liberal" does not mean "dedicated to attacking all traditional views." It means--among other things--believing all people should be treated equally. Unless he's repeatedly accusing every man he works with of having their wife of completing their homework, that's not the case. Liberal vs conservative has nothing to do with this, but the fact that he's treating at least one woman poorly based on her gender (in an already sexist field, by your username) means that he should not be in this position without some corrections.
He's either sexually harassing you or he's discriminating against you--and likely other women--based on your gender. The terminology is not important. The behavior is unacceptable.
Yeah I'm struggling to see an innocent explanation for the professor's behavior. It strongly smells of thinly-veiled sexual harassment. OP you need to be very careful around this individual. I think your assessment of the situation is most likely way off unless you've left out a lot of details.
Had I said it was sexual harassment, I would have been told to lighten up, that it was a joke, not to take it so seriously, that I couldn't be trusted to assess whether or not it was sexual harassment, etc. Now that I have said it is not sexual harassment, people are saying the opposite. What did I expect?
@JGreenwell Public university
@thumbtackthief I'm a web developer professionally, but the degree is an MBA. Sorry, should have added that earlier. So the program is not male dominated. Seems to be very close to 50%/50% based on my observations of my own classmates and my friends' class, which just graduated this May.
Discussion on question by webDev_grad…
Discussion on question by webDev_grad…