Very minor question: What does "dressing in a way that would correspond to my attire" mean?

@user2768 I would interpret this as "Lily is wearing a lot of vintage clothing. I guess she likes vintage. I guess I should start wearing some vintage cloths as well.". And yes, this happens :)

@ user 2768 One example would this. For example, if I'd dress in orange/brown the day before, I'd start noticing people in brown the following day; or if I'd dress in a plaid pattern, I'd notice something similar. It is subtle and it might involve some female instincts to notice (honestly, I believe it has become rather obvious for anyone to notice), but I can assure you that I am not crazy when I say this. I have other better examples that I'm not able to share - otherwise, anybody from this office who might be reading this thread would be able to immediately identify me.

@xLeitix and @ LilyOfTheEast Wow! That's weird.

@LilyOfTheEast I'm not laughing at all. I 100% believe you.

Moderators, is there any way how we can make sure that this question does not go into HNQ? Because we can all imagine the dumpster fire that will follow if it does.

@xLeitix too late

Thank you xLeitix. But what's a HNQ? Shall I delete this thread? I wouldn't want it to get noticed by too many...

@LilyOfTheEast HNQ means "Hot Network Questions." Over to the right of Stack Exchange page.

@LilyOfTheEast The Hot Network Questions that you see on the right. Typically, if I question like this appears here, you can bet that there will be an influx of trolls, sexists, and sexist trolls.

@LilyOfTheEast Don't delete it! But be prepared that if the question gets increased visibility from being in the HNQ, it will also gets increased attention, including the unwanted kind.

I wouldn't mind getting some strange comments. I'm just worried that people from my university would notice this. That would make the situation even more awkward...

@LilyOfTheEast There are thousands of Asians getting degrees in Europe. It may be tricky to trace this post to you. (Although, if you go by Lily in real life.......that may make it easier).

No, I'm not Lily in real life. Let's leave it here then. :)

@LilyOfTheEast My guess then is that it would be insanely hard to trace you to this post. It is often very hard to trace someone from a single post. (People likely could trace me if they tried. My membership on other SE sites provides a very small candidate pool [Korean, Math, Academia]). But even if they did miraculously trace it to you, maybe it would clue them in on the fact that you want to be left alone.

It might be a good thing if a bunch of European men with Asian women colleagues read this and stop mimicking the day to day dress of their colleagues...

@LilyOfTheEast my own significant other (a real Lili, and also of Asian decent... kinda funny coincidence lol) had a very similar thing happening to her at school... until her big, burly, tough looking (even if I am a teddy bear, but shhhh) boyfriend showing up and making it visible she was taken ended up stopping all of these in the bud, except for 2 or 3 people who didn't get the message, and ended up being a bit on the "creepy" side of things anyway

@Patrice Well, the fact that she has to prove that she's "taken" in order to stop the unwanted attention/harassing is pretty sad though.

@user4052054 definitely with you on that. I don't mean this a correct course of action (in the sense of "we shouldn't get to that to have someone be respected). But it works... sadly

What part of Europe? Some of the advice for handling things is going to be cultural and this site tends to have a bit of an American bias.

@Scientist I'm wondering the same thing in terms of dress and it's really hard to say without more detail. I wonder if the OP might have inadvertently become a bit of a tread setter on campus, if only because they would stand out more than others. On my own campus (rural university) I've noticed the same sort of behavior taking place (ex., male faculty wearing sport coats to lecture after a male lecturer wears them on a regular basis).

but I can assure you that I am not crazy when I say this. I have other better examples that I'm not able to share - I don't know what your better examples are, but based on the examples you do give, it could be partly a file drawer problem (e.g., I notice when people wear similar T-shirts to mine) or seeing you where certain clothes may be a subconsious reminder to others to break their old orange tweed jacket.

Note: I'm not trying to suggest that this is all in your mind---I do believe you are receiving some unwanted attention, but sometimes it's difficult to assess what exactly is intentional.

@Kimball You mean the Baader-Meinhof phenomenon?

You say you are visiting a European university. Is this your first time living and working in this area? Is it possible some of this behavior might be caused by a cultural difference?

@David K, no. I have been exposed to this and similar cultures for a long time and I adapt/fit in very well.

Unfortunately, nearly everyone is interpreting the question as one of dealing with unwanted male advances (i.e. lechery). That wasn't really how I read your question, however. Nor is it the only sort of male misbehavior. Some men want to overshadow women and put them down, independent of any "romantic" motives. Reaching a good result is hard for any person who is treated as a minority and as vulnerable. In at least one instance, a man took over the work of a woman and he won a Nobel prize for her work. Find allies. There can be strength in numbers and you are weak standing alone.

Dressing like you? Wait, what? But that got edited out... so you don't want the question of how to deal with some weirdo dudes at your work, answered?

@ Mazura, I actually said ‘correspond to", not "copy."’

Where in Europe? If it's in the Mediterranean countries, it's normal. Just be a bit cold, and be patient,and wear a ring in your finger, I would say. =D If you're pretty, you're pretty. Life isn't perfect.

@LilyOfTheEast reading your question made me cringe on behalf of all those males who are (hopefully) inadvertently creating an uncomfortable situation for you. So sorry to hear of yet another example of women not feeling like they can act and look the way they want. I think your question is an important contribution to Academia.SE because academia has a lot of international students and employees, so there's the mix of cultural backgrounds that is not so common to other workplaces.