FWIW I have officially played about 20 minutes of Dwarf Fortress, which went as follows:
- What the heck, it's free, I'll give it a try
- Start new game
- Okay, how do I give my dwarves commands?
- Agh, how do I give my dwarves commands???
- Welp, I've got a friend coming over in a few minutes anyway, so forget it