The Awkward Silence - 2018-08-10

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Extroverted Main Man

12:29 AM

0

Q: Roommate says she wont/can't take out trash. How to ask for compensation?

I moved into a shared home where the landlord is also one of the people living in the suite I share. After moving in she told me she can't take out the garbage or recycling. I don't know why she can't. Should I ask her why? I don't mind doing extra once in a while but I think it's unfair if the ...

roommates housemates

1:06 AM

Yeah, after bedtime it's pretty quiet in here.

3 hours later…

Extroverted Main Man

4:15 AM

0

Q: How to put condemnation more lightly on StackOverflow

I saw this question on Stack Overflow: https://stackoverflow.com/questions/51777986/custom-wordpress-menu-using-walker The person was pretty much saying, "I need a navigation menu, do this and this and this. Anybody can do it for me?" I was obviously very angry because this person thought Stack...

conversations criticism abuse

4:34 AM

@ExtrovertedMainMan VTC

3 hours later…

7:10 AM

→ 41 messages moved to Trash

argh!

@AJ ?

I was doing the cleaning. :P

Userscripts make it... less than 5 clicks ;)

^^

7:12 AM

@Mithrandir lol. which one?

it's somewhere in here.... gist.github.com/superplane39/61087221d36ee3b25090e8599638e0e5

this one: github.com/JC3/SEUserScripts/raw/master/ChatMoveHelper.user.js

@Mithrandir how do I use it?

StackApps post:

4

Q: Chat Move Helper / Bot Cleanup Tool

Description: Extends the room-owner move message tool in chat to make it easier to quickly clean up after bots by moving their messages, commands, and replies to them. Adds a couple visualization features to the normal move function as well. I hope this is useful, I know there's a number...

script chat room-owners

morning

o/

7:15 AM

\o

Hi there :)

o/ @avazula

7:34 AM

How are you today?

1 hour later…

9:03 AM

morning

noon

→ 5 messages moved to Trash

TFW it was finally gonna rain like hell at your place but it never even drizzles (thunderstorm diverted) and now the 16 day forecast is all sun & hot temps again

another 2 full weeks of 30C+

Fun.

we're at 22°C max for today

so nice ^.^

inside 24° and not going up for a change

32 here today.

...and I'm l'm lugging furniture...

9:28 AM

good luck Mith

9:58 AM

@Imus finally got inside temps back to 21.5

I am NOT going to vacuum clean today :P

you should, and put windows open this evening

it's even worse if you need to clean when it's 30° again :p

@Magisch :( over here the fourteen day forecast is now for temps of 25-27

@Imus Point taken. But they're not predicting 30 degrees for tomorrow sooo....

Don't do today what can be postponed till tomorrow

nah you're right. I wouldn't either :D

It used to be that here until yesterday. It was also forecasted to finally rain 4L/m^2 yesterday. Alas, we got no rain and now the forecast has been corrected to another hot 2 weeks

@Magisch Ugh... You should migrate ;)

10:03 AM

I'm actually legitimately a bit scared for our nearby forest

It hasn't rained at all in the last 4 weeks

singing: "And I see fire ... inside the mountains" :p

Ed Sheeran - I See Fire (Music Video)

nono

I See Fire - The Hobbit - Ed Sheeran - Peter Hollens

ahahah

Same song, but Peter Hollens instead

10:15 AM

I'm sorry, I'm in love with the guitar of the first one

10:38 AM

Tom Dice - Me And My Guitar with Lyrics

this is the most disappointing indian curry I've ever had

sad day

11:22 AM

Juvabrain is back?

11:47 AM

Oh, looks like @KasparKjeldsen is back after the mutinery we had last afternoon. Hi Kaspar!

@Imus best one. :D

I survived the mutiny... i saw it all but said nothing. :P

Kaspar Kjeldsen

Hi! Yeah I had to see if things (d)evolved further :)

I had to leave during the mutiny ... took some time to catch up reading afterwards XD

always fun to first start a huge discussion about feminism and then walking away ^.^

@Imus Don't start again xD

:)

haha

to be fair I did start it off with "Don't bother arguing about this with me :) I know it's overgeneralising and unfair to feminists with good intentions. I'm just no longer interested :p"

no idea how that actually started the discussion

11:52 AM

I know :)

The outcome was interesting tho :p

any other topic I should tell I'm not interested in to discuss about?

It depends, what's your goal?

is trolling chat a goal?

or is the goal to do something about the boredom and sparking nice discussions about an anoying topic just a means to that end?

Of course! Not a laudable one, but it's a goal

Was about to say how "I'm not interested in all the lgbtq+_!%? terms, my opinion is that people should just be what they feel happy about without having to put a lable on it", but that's one of those things that starts impossible discussions as well ... so let's not go there ;)

11:57 AM

@Imus Oooh, please don't, this one is way too difficult to be handled lightly :v

exactly XD

What about ... the continuously rising price of bananas?

isn't that just regular inflation?

You think? I used to buy them 1.5€ per kilo. Now you want 6 of them, you have to pay 2.7€. That's a lot in just six months!

basic economics: demand/request?

11:58 AM

And it's not season-related since I don't remember it was so big for a raise the past years

people pay €2.7 for six so that's what they sell it for

will probably keep going up till people stop buying them

Kaspar Kjeldsen

How's this for an interpersonal exchange: I work for a benchmarking center for the construction sector in Denmark, which means I get to talk to a lot of "construction workers", architects etc. Was on the phone with one today, who asked me about my vacation, and after having told him were I went, proceeded to ask me whether I got laid or not.

I have not spoken with this man before, in my life.

Wow, that's direct

depends on what you want to achieve. If you wanne be friendly with the working class and don't mind discussing personal matters feel free to brag about this awesome girl that got lucky with you

@Imus or boy

;)

12:01 PM

if you want to uphold basic work professionalism you can handle that "correctly" instead :p

Kaspar Kjeldsen

Went with "correctly" I think.

as I said, depended on what you want to achieve :p

Kaspar Kjeldsen

... I just wanted him to log in to our website and fill out a form..

That's rude

in that case yeah, probably not a good idea to not do the professional response thingy

if you wanted time off from work and be able to explain it as "I was talking to a customer, can't blame me if that one took long ..." there's other options ;)

then again, you were the manager ... so you have to be a good example ... probably not a good idea what I had in mind :D

"Oh man you should've been there. It was unbelievable. It started off with just this really cute one, but her friends were interested as well, when we then went to this euhm, since we are in a professional setting here I can't really tell the name, but you get it right, this certain really interesting place where you only go with people that you want to be more than just friends with, things really started going" ... followed by a "I'm just messing with you, I sat home and ...

Kaspar Kjeldsen

12:06 PM

We don't really keep taps on people like that. If they want to have facebook/whatever open on one screen and work on another, I don't really care as long as work gets done. In other words, they don't need to fake interest in a phone call to "not work", so neither will I ;)

well, if you want a funny 5 minute break feel free to try something like that to first make his day and then get the forms filled when he's in a good mood ^^,

don't hold me responsible for the consequences though :p

Kaspar Kjeldsen

Haha, noted.

@Imus you little innocent devil ;)

Kaspar Kjeldsen

I think the weirdest person we've ever had on call (not me, but my director), got into a long explanation about how he had recently read Mein Kampf, and saw some good pointers in it.

o_o

That is really NSFW

Kaspar Kjeldsen

12:09 PM

This was a marketing-manager for "insert large construction company"

@avazula what?

@AJ Talking about Mein Kampf with colleagues / coworkers, that's NSFW

Kaspar Kjeldsen

But my BEST call ever, was a woman who couldn't figure out how to log in to our website, and after talking back and forth for some time, we finally figured out that she was trying to log into her zyxel router and not our website.

@avazula what is Mein Kampf?

Kaspar Kjeldsen

Nope, not talking with collegagues/coworkers... With the director of ANOTHER company.. We were just as amazed.

12:12 PM

@AJ Have you seriously never heard of Mein Kampf? o.O

@AJ Oh ... That's the book Hitler wrote to explain what Germany (and more generally Europe) should do to "fix" the economy. He talked about the Jewish genocide as such solution in that book.

@Imus no

@avazula ohh

@KasparKjeldsen Some people are bold ...

I wouldn't mind arguing certain things that hitler did do right. Not the Jewish genocide ofcourse but there must be certain other things

Kaspar Kjeldsen

@Imus But speaking of sensitive subjects, probably not the thing you bring up, while representing your company in a call with another company.

12:14 PM

oh wait, I shouldn't spark these kind of discussions :p

@KasparKjeldsen That, I agree on :D

Kaspar Kjeldsen

Not exactly "smalltalk"

well, it's a director of a company. They do bigtalk instead

user image

we really don't get time from talking about our politics (both current and past), let alone foreign ones.

IPS Comment Bot

12:31 PM

I agree. Emotional infidelity is a notion that hadn't been considered by me until I placed my question here and got responses. — Qyburn 1 min ago

#17456 Qyburn (49 rep) | A: How to tell my wife about a (possibly romantic) relationship with another woman? (score: 3) | posted 35 hours ago by user1751825 (749 rep) | Toxicity 0.15956508 | edited 25 hours ago by Em C (8553 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["chatty"]

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IPS Comment Bot

12:47 PM

The problem with breaking up with her without telling her about the affair is that I will not be welcome around her family's house

you will be even less welcome if you tell her that you are having an affair. I just recently parted with my ex and found out that she cheated on me and now I really hate her. From my experience telling her is the worst you can do (for you and for her) — XtremeBaumer 1 min ago

#17470 XtremeBaumer (1577 rep) | Q: How to break it to my girlfriend that I have been having an affair with her mother? (score: -1) | posted 24 hours ago by user20803 (19 rep) | Toxicity 0.51097155 | edited 23 hours ago by user20803 (19 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic"]

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1:03 PM

Hi all. I'm going home, so I won't be available for a few hours, but I did post a question in the sandbox. Perhaps you could have a look when you have time? I'll be looking again later tonight. Thanks ~~ interpersonal.meta.stackexchange.com/a/3219/12101

@Belle-Sophie Sure! :)

0

A: Sandbox for Proposed Questions

I am struggling a lot with formulating this in a clear way. Maybe that's also why I have the question ;) It feels like a very messy question. Feel free to edit it rigorously, I'll revert if I don't like it. Title: As a photographer, how do ask people if they want me to 'polish up' their body ...

Extroverted Main Man

0

Q: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy

A bit of a background, I am in my early 20's, I was in a relationship for 8 years, we have broke up on good terms last month, and I have never experienced "single life" so I don't have any experience in this kinda stuff. During a night out, I went on a trip with a group of friends to a differen...

relationships europe

1:20 PM

I still think that's quite creepy, so I don't think I'm gonna answer it..... Someone else can :)

@Belle-Sophie *giggles a bit at how photoshoop* would be pronounced. Besides that typo I don't really see how to improve it. Besides my comment about the title it looks fine to me :)

@ElizB Makes me wonder what about it feels creepy. My first thought was it's just a one night stand ... but it isn't their first night and he actually seems to connect with the girl...

perhaps it feels weird to ask her "to a hotel" instead of "to my place" (even if my place while traveling is a hotel most likely)

@Imus Right, yeah. Maybe it's creepy to the others around himself and the girl?

Yeah, maybe.

still don't get "never experienced single life"

I'm guessing he means a certain situation where you're single and can just smooch up with any girl (/...) you meet without cheating on someone else

@Imus ahh, yeah. Hmm. Need to drink my tea, I'm not quite awake yet. :P

Which made me realise that I have never actually felt like I've been in that situation ... hmmm

2 hours later…

3:03 PM

Against Me! - Reinventing Axl Rose (Lyrics on Screen)

@Imus I am definitely from a different time, seeing that question.

IPS Comment Bot

+1 talking about what you want, including during sex, only helps make sure you're both getting what you wanted and both people's needs are met. There's never a reason to feel embarassed about asking what somebody does/doesn't want you to do with them. — Bilkokuya 57 secs ago

#17509 Bilkokuya (1682 rep) | A: Ask a girl whether she would like to come back to a hotel with me on a night out without being creepy (score: 9) | posted 46 minutes ago by Andrew (2779 rep) | Toxicity 0.51369274 | edited 11 minutes ago by Andrew (2779 rep)

Matched regex(es) ["+1"]

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IPS Comment Bot

3:06 PM

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Oh goodness I'm old. I would never have even considered asking someone to a hotel room back in the ancient days of the 1980s

@RichardU m.imgur.com/gallery/FOwZ77O

IPS Comment Bot

3:29 PM

I agree. Lose the gender bias, and it's fine. "After you" is perfectly polite in all circumstances. — Andrew 1 min ago

#17482 Andrew (2779 rep) | A: How rude is "ladies first rule" in USA? (score: 21) | posted 21 hours ago by BFG95 (1757 rep) | Toxicity 0.46095464

Matched regex(es) ["chatty"]

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So... Anywho...

Ex drama is on tap today. May have to work up a question about diplomaticly saying "your problems are no longer my problems"

@apaul oof sorry :/ i can help some if you need.

3:48 PM

@apaul That's already very diplomatic

@Tinkeringbell Ya... They don't seem to be taking the hint.

@apaul Not replying? Blocking?

@Tinkeringbell Eh, tempting, but somewhat likely to cause escalation.

@Tinkeringbell blocking is rarely helpful for anything. A simple but assertive variation on just saying no is quite often more effective.

@apaul hmm. And why not escalate? I mean, it's not your problem...

@RichardU I have very successfully send some @#€__&- in online games a last message and blocked them. Even some real life people that were nasty online too...

3:56 PM

@apaul Sometimes it's useful to be blunt. You want to signal to your ex that they can't come to you with their problems. So saying "Your problems are no longer my problems" will clearly communicate this in a rather blunt fashion.

@Tinkeringbell I have never bothered to block anyone online

We're also still legally married.... Complicates things quite a bit. Kinda need to keep things as civil as possible till the paperwork has been shuffled.

@apaul I can certainly relate to that.

@apaul Ah. That sucks. So it still kinda is your problem too, to the extent that you can't just tell them to go away :(

@Tinkeringbell I mean, I could, but that could mean more hassle down the line.

Extroverted Main Man

4:04 PM

0

Q: How can I convey to my dad that I like that he buys me things, but sometimes they are just not my taste?

I'm an adult male in his late 20's and have been living on my own for several years with a good job. My dad every so often will go to garage sales or the store and see something interesting he thinks I'd like. These are usually small things, typically under $50. However, I have my own tastes in t...

4:28 PM

0

A: Sandbox for Proposed Questions

Breaking up well Long story short, my ex and I split on pretty poor terms a couple months ago. They cheated again, I moved out, and now they're moving in with the person they cheated with... I'm trying to "break up well", trying not to hold grudges, or foment animosity. I'm not looking to be fr...

4:40 PM

Though it's indeed a pretty cool name

user image

@Sandman twitch twitch I want to answer the question but I don't think that's what the sandbox is for xD

@TheTinyMan I wanted to do that for Belle-Sophie's question. hard to resist, I know.

@TheTinyMan patience is a virtue.

@apaul Not one of mine, though. ;-)

I'm really sorry to hear about what you're going through, by the way.

4:53 PM

@TheTinyMan probably post it before long. There don't seem to be major corrections or concerns so far.

Yeah. :-)

I agree :)

5:14 PM

Why does there have to be another 2+ week long heatwave this summar

:(

5:41 PM

it's all a matter of attitude @Magisch

FROZEN | "In Summer" Song - Olaf | Official Disney UK

El'endia Starman

That's probably actually among my least favorite songs of Frozen, but I did love the part where Olaf breaks a rhyme because of what it would mean otherwise. "Winter's a good time to stay in and cuddle // But put me in summer and I'll be a........ happy snowman!"

Hehe, yeah that part's awesome

It's not my favorite but that's my favorite part as well.

Vuelie, Let it Go, First time in Forever, and Love is an Open Door are favorites in there.

especially the line of "Don't know if I'm elated or gassy / But I'm somewhere in that zone!...." from First time in Forever

6:42 PM

@TheTinyMan You're up, feel free.

Extroverted Main Man

2

Q: Breaking up well

Long story short, my ex and I split on pretty poor terms a couple months ago. They cheated again, I moved out, and now they're moving in with the person they cheated with... I'm trying to "break up well", trying not to hold grudges, or foment animosity. I'm not looking to be friends with them, b...

conversations united-states relationships conflict-aversion divorce

Microsoft word is trying to help me get out of my bad habit of writing passively. Writing actively is better, I know... the struggle is real...

It's becoming 7 pages, slowly but surely. Need 8-10 pages. getting there. :)

2 hours later…

8:27 PM

@apaul Jess pretty much nailed what I was going to say. :-)

8:41 PM

@TheTinyMan Ya... Definitely seems like they've been there and done that.

@ElizB psst.. you still have to flag them manually ;)

@EmC Yeah, i know. Falling asleep here on the bumpy bus ride home. I'll get to it.

@ElizB oh ok! no worries :)

@EmC thanks for the heads up :)

now that I've switched to public transit commuting I'm feeling the pain that is SE on a phone..

8:55 PM

So sleepy... bumpy bus helps keep one awake, but just enough to hang on, at the next turn

at least you're heading home :D

@EmC yup, to the hubby, dinner, and computer games... probably age of mythology if I'm awake enough...

3 hours later…

11:35 PM

If anyone has time, can ya help me out with this question in the sandbox? Running out of ideas, and the user is fidgety. not rude, but just fidgety and wanting an answer.

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