Background
My girlfriend and I [19F, 19M] have been together for 2 years and have just graduated from the local polytechnic (estimated to be similar to the US Associate's degree) and its now the vacation period before her university starts. I have found a part-time job to pass the time while wai...
I don't understand why this was downvoted. Yes, it does not directly answer the question, but it is a sideways-thinking answer that might address the underlying problem. I am similar, I don't like parties, but I like to appear, say hi to all my friends, chat a bit with those I didn't see in a while, and then make an exit before it gets to me. And that works for me, and lets me avoid the standing-uncomfortable-in-a-corner phase. — Tom14 secs ago
@Daniel I see your point, but OP's living arrangements are already fucked up, because OP lets her roommate treat her as if she doesn't exist, for fear of confrontation. — henning28 secs ago
+1 I love your answer, and it is what I do with my wife too, but I can see why some couples would rather handle it by hiding feelings instead. Seemed to be spot on for op since it has been accepted though. :) — Julien Lopez55 secs ago
I am a transwoman about 7 months in my real life phase and not a week goes by that I am not accidentally misgendered by my some of my coworkers. That is, they use the wrong pronouns to refer to me or, rarely, use my dead name.
I have come out at work more than a year ago and since then gradually...
Not an answer, but I noticed most answers seem to take for granted that, though not necessary, makeup makes someone more beautiful. I just wanted to point out there are people (I am one of those) who dislike its look and the unnatural impression that comes with it. — spectras2 mins ago
I agree with this answer. It takes time, and for "older" people, who are not used to changing genders, it takes even more time to get used to this. People don't like it if they are constantly corrected - even if the person who corrects them has a good reason. — Edgar44 secs ago
@Pheo NVZ used to leave them to keep track of the chat transcript ;) But if everybody starts doing it, it get's annoying. Especially once people start leaving them during discussions because they want to get back to it later.
@Pheo You can push a button on the chat that says 'load to my last message' (top of the page, scroll up). As far as I know, people keep leaving dots or things like that when they don't have anything to say/no time to say it, and press that button when they do have time
(Well, some bots do run all the time ;) Can't really blame them for the confusion. Maybe you should include that in the room description, or write a message about that and star it ;)
@Galastel I didn't say they were equal so I'm unsure why you seem to be admonishing me for trying to agree with you. But since my comment seems to have been unhelpful, consider it gone. — Spagirl29 secs ago
@ExtrovertedMainMan Is this question focused enough? So far only this answer focuses on interpersonal things to do. Answers scolding her coworkers and telling her she shouldn't care about alienating them will surely follow.
@Pheo No, I'm judging it based on how it's worded. It's not bad but I think it can be made better. More focused questions tend to generate more good answers and less bad ones(not me saying, I remember it from meta or from chat).
OP just responded to my comment, I think editing it into the question will make it better.
I often ask doubts to professors outside of class, on technical topics (I am a student in STEM) that I want to explore into, and I value their input. When I ask a question about something that is unusual in the technical sense , many times the professors do not understand my query properly, lead...
This question is too early. You've said a returning player who wears a low-cut shirt. You've only had this happen once. Why not come back to us if it happens again? Currently her leaving might have been nothing more than she had to go quickly, or didn't want to socialise after the event was over. Certainly her returning suggests your actions haven't been enough to stop her. Also, she has full agency too (as she has shown by accepting to come again), allow her to continue that agency with what she wears this time. Maybe it was laundry day, that was all she had left, and this won't happen again. — Philbo2 mins ago
Can you consider removing the "(correctly)" from your first sentence? I really like your answer and want to upvote but that's a loaded claim and it prevents me from doing so. — Oleg36 secs ago
@Oleg With regard to that comment... if people start doing that on this post, you can just post a comment asking them to honor the premise. But by leaving the comment the way it's written now, it might actually start the debate you're trying to avoid.
I understand that, because I've struggled with those wordings a lot too...
but should I say I identify as Christian or that I am a Christian?
@Ash Isn't it a decision, just like veganism and religion?
Heya @Deepak... you seem to be offline? :P
user15026
5:41 PM
To me that part feels like it kinda invalidates her feelings - she didn't decide to become a woman, she was one just now her presentation/name match her identity
user15026
So no, I don't think it's the same as a diet choice or a religion choice, really - those are things you pick for yourself, gender identity is a thing that you are
user15026
(I accept and understand these ideas can change, for some people there is a fluidity etc)
I sorta like the question, at the same time I want more details before I answer... telling people how you feel about something while not violating their rights is basically what assertiveness is all about...
But I want to know if I'm dealing with a stubborn asshole or honest mistake before I suggest an approach to it
@Oleg Well, just saying, but a name is just a name and a pronoun just a pronoun. I agree there will be differences, always, if only it were for the people I'd prefer dating. But to me, if someone says they want to be called Gretchen, I call them Gretchen
If only because English speaking people can't pronounce my real name without making it sound like the name of someone I don't want to be associated with, so I always give them another name to call me by.
A teacher of mine have introduced me to one of his colleague(teacher A). However, I am more interested in the work of teacher B , whom he might or might not know. How do I say I may want to collaborate with teacher B, with out making him feel bad about his choice for teacher A. I want to express ...
