The Awkward Silence

4:40 AM

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Morning all!

gparyani

Has there ever been an instance where a user kept changing the accepted answer to their question so as to award Populist badges to others?

I can't remember any instance though, but I once got a Populist badge on Movies & TV as user has accepted mine first but then accepted other answer, thus giving me both Enlightened and Populist badges.

Why do you ask?

6:06 AM

morning

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Morning :)

7:40 AM

Yellooo!

waves crash into the sand

Sounds like she is super stressed and probably should consider some help around the home to take the pressure off. Where do you live because services vary so much between countries (here in the uk there’s loads of support for this) — Matthew E Cornish 1 min ago

#19346 Matthew E Cornish | Q: How to ask my grandmother to be nicer with my grandfather? (score: 2) | posted 11 hours ago by Oliv (206 rep) | Toxicity 0.06933213 | tps/fps: 0/0

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic"]

@Mithrandir Are you at the beach? :p

@IPSCommentBot fp

Marked this comment as caught incorrectly (fp) Currently marked 0tps/1fps

@avazula No, but I decided to change up my wave a bit :P

7:42 AM

Haha :)

Q: How do you tell a Facebook friend that they might be on the autism spectrum?

0

TL;DR How do I tell this Facebook friend that they might be on the autism spectrum whithout being to intrusive? Background I have this Facebook friend that I care deeply about and with whom I interact often. This person care a lot and is very compasionnate. They don't know it but all the link...

friends autism

8:33 AM

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8:44 AM

Ah right @Noon, I didn't thought about it but @JAD's answer made me think about it: just FYI, we have a policy of not diagnosing people on IPS

Q: Handling the question "what did you do for the weekend?"

0

Another week, another Monday and another same old unpleasant question (at least for me) - What did you do for the weekend? A couple years ago I moved to another country in western Europe from South-East of Europe. As you might be familiar, the culture is a bit different between these two region...

conversations colleagues

Q: Make my friends take serious what I say

9:36 AM

0

I'm having trouble with a few friends (I see on a regular basis) to take me, and what I say, serious or even flat out ignore what I told them. Also, it's not like I'm telling them to do stuff they can't do or things that are unbearable. Example: This weekend, me and 3 friends went out, got some...

friends friend-groups

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@Magisch A quick IPS question. It's not considered rude when a German guy says hi and you just smile and nod, is it? ;)

@AJ depends on situation. with a stranger on the street, yes it's not rude

how about in workplace?

eeeh, not the politest way to respond

depends

if it's clear that you're busy for example, then it's fine I guess

but usually when you're spoken to, you respond

9:42 AM

@AJ very dependant on the person in question

in our department we communicate mostly nonverbally.

I met him in the restroom. And I had to go in quickly.

probably wont be seen as rude

@AJ I think it's okay if you needed to leave quickly. They'd have understand that you were in a hurry

okay. thanks.

ah in the restroom you're fine. It's okay to greet him back, but IMO it is almost etiquette to only nod and smile. At least I do that exclusively in restrooms. I don't want to start conversations there, and I don't want to intrude their privacy - Also to give the people in the stalls some peace. Overhearing conversations from in there feels strange :)

9:54 AM

I don't start conversations in restrooms either, it's weird

I think you get a pass while peeing

gotta focus on your aim

or on in this case on your timing

Q: How to approach a friend about his girlfriend asking to sleep with me?

10:08 AM

1

Context My girlfriend (let's name her Claire) share a flat with a couple (let's name them Bob and Alice). Bob is a close friend of mine, and I get along pretty well with Alice. The three of them used to sleep all together, in open relationship, things were fine (that was before bonds between Ali...

relationships awkward-situations approach

10:48 AM

Is the Introverted Meta Man on a day off? (broken) He isn't showing my meta post here :/ (it's been 4 hours)

Q: When should one recommend deletion for a Low Quality Post in the queue?

@Noon Mmmh

Would this work?

Ugh, I can't ping them.

1

When I first got enough reputation to review the queue, I was still a very new user and had no idea how to use my new "powers". I had the hardest time understanding when I should "Recommend Deletion" for the "Low Quality Posts". I know how it works now but I thought that this question might be ...

discussion

@avazula Thanks for replacing the Meta Man :D

@Noon Anything for you :D

introverted meta woman today

2

@Magisch Haha

This is weird though. Does someone know who's taking care of them? @Mith? I guess that it's not @thesecretmaster (already so much to do with the comment bots!)

10:52 AM

the SE system

meta feeds are always slow

don't worry about it too much

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Hello

@Mithrandir many times I'm faster than the introverted and the extraverted bot

@Termatinator hey there!

Q: When should one recommend deletion for a Low Quality Post in the queue?

I don't know why but my classmate just put sad music on in the classroom

oh never mind, loud music again :(

Introverted Meta Man.

2

When I first got enough reputation to review the queue, I was still a very new user and had no idea how to use my new "powers". I had the hardest time understanding when I should "Recommend Deletion" for the "Low Quality Posts". I know how it works now but I thought that this question might be ...

discussion

11:04 AM

@IntrovertedMetaMan. you're late

@IntrovertedMetaMan. Good Lorde, you're as handsome as you're slow

@avazula with his speed he's like me, IRL

@Termatinator reliably slow?

@Cashbee doing everything slow

@avazula ♫ we live in citiiees you never see on screen ♫

11:13 AM

@Magisch Exactly <3

Haha, that's actually the way I found to pursue using that expression yet exclude gods and religions from it

I'm not particularly a big fan but my dance club used to create choreographies on some of her songs, so that's lots of memories for me :)

I'm not exactly a fan of music

@Termatinator Some people aren't :)

I know her only from Sourth park. Is she good?

@avazula yup, but for some reason most people I know can't understand that

Maybe not "almost all" are obese, but you're getting close at 40% and growing (pun intended). — pipe 26 secs ago

11:19 AM

My first love actually liked 4 songs overall ...

#19334 pipe | Q: How to make girlfriend feel better about health and body (score: 26) | posted 27 hours ago by DaveThePerson (133 rep) | Toxicity 0.43819714 | tps/fps: 0/0

Matched regex(es) ["possible-aic"]

@IPSCommentBot rude

Registered as rude

@Cashbee Erh. Her voice is interesting, I'd say

@avazula more than me :P

11:29 AM

@Termatinator eh, music is relative

and sometimes people find it late. Some never at all.

@Termatinator For instance, I'm no big fan of movies. Like, I barely watch them and forget them instantly. Makes my SO crazy :p

@avazula I need my media ;)

^^

Strangely enough, I like series

@avazula I am a big fan of movies, but 1 series tops over for me: game of thrones. I love that one

@Termatinator Haha, I never could watch it. Too different from the books, I got frustrated. I really prefer Martin's other books.

11:34 AM

or designated survivor, I also love that one

@avazula yeah it is different yeah

it's weird seeing someone die if he's still alive in the books

spoiler alert! I didn't know someone dies!

:D

lol

"someone lives" is a bigger spoiler...

@Mithrandir especially for certain characters

hah.

11:40 AM

@Mithrandir haha

@avazula I couldn't really get into GOT

Its a good book, but GRRM loves his byzentine plots too much

@Termatinator anyways, see: it's not that odd not to like music. Some don't like movies, or theater, or series, and it's ok :)

@JourneymanGeek actually, the book is called: a story of ice and fire

@JourneymanGeek Hahaha. Never liked it either. I guess I read the first 2 books because it was bored and didn't have anything else to read

*song

;)

11:42 AM

@avazula yeah, oh wel. I consider myself weird anyway :)

@Termatinator In a good way, I hope :D weird can be fun.

I don't like people who don't consider themselves as weird

@JourneymanGeek uh true, I'm being corrected by the person I tried to correct

@Cashbee Hahaha

@Termatinator I'm having 2-3 conversations at once, while my brain is distracted on realworld/IPS issues so... small mistakes are plausible ;)

11:45 AM

@avazula weird as in, I don't have a lot of emotions and trouble expressing them. and my thinking process is different

for example anger, don't have it. except to my sister

except to my sister haha

@Cashbee she's almost always a exception

I also don't have a lot of laughter. I'm mostly serious

and when I try to make a joke, people don't understand because I talk monotone

Getting mad at your sibling's pretty human ;)

My brother's the last person I real-yelled at ;p

@JourneymanGeek yup, like I said, she's the only exception

Especially when you're the second kid XD

(or the first. But different reasons I guess? ;p)

11:55 AM

second here

ya

We don't get no respect ;)

we don't get no satisfaction either badum-tss

Oh, so true.

but, she is the only one to get in real trouble

11:57 AM

@JourneymanGeek @Cashbee Oh please stop. I'm the oldest of 6 gals, what do you think happens to me when they do silly things? I get reprimanded xD

with parents and police

That dosen't mean anything, simply means she's crap at not getting caught ;)

@avazula I might be grumpy. I'm currently having to say "I told you so" without saying so to my parents XD

but I think being the middle child is the worst

luckily I'm the youngest of two

Well only 2 of us surviving so... I'm the second and youngest ;)

(of 5. My poor mom :( )

and I do actually have a younger half-brother and half-sister, but that's complicated

Also 2 older siblings, but they were stillborn

12:04 PM

Anyway, soooo annoying when people don't listen to you, And you're right. And you can't really go "I told you so" ;)

Curse of the second kid XD

weirdly enough, it's a blessing to be the youngest when I'm with my grandparents

lol

quite, but I lost both my grandads early (actually never met one) and we're the only branch of the family out here

@JourneymanGeek oh damn, I feel sorry for your loss

@Termatinator never really knew them that well

actually never knew one at all.

@JourneymanGeek still, they are family

12:07 PM

And I apparently had lots of quality time with the other.

I deal with mortality ok. As long as its humans.

We're all gonna die. Eventually ;)

@JourneymanGeek my biggest fear

Well, either there's nothing on the other side

or another adventure. new game +

I'd rather focus on now, and try to be the best version of me I can be ;)

@JourneymanGeek that's why I fear it, the unknown. I can't handle it

But there's so much you don't know in life too ;)

I don't know what will happen in the next 5 minutes.

Your life could change in one moment, one phone call, one missed bus ;)

Or one big decision, one conversation, one moment when you choose to change a life.

also a lot of fears

I don't like unknowns

That's why I try to know everything before going into a situation

every outcome, every possible mistake, every solution

12:15 PM

That's stressful

I just try to stack the deck XD

pretty normal to me, I'm used to it

I used to be like that, when my anxiety was really bad

I also have 1001 thoughts at the same time

hah

that's me today

lol

12:17 PM

I got stuff I need other people to help me kickstart

and if it works, I have no idea what to do

it's also one of the reason that I am an introvert

and they're kinda putting it off

I'm one too. No one seems to believe me XD

XD welcome to the club

and I do have more confidence online

with "strangers"

SE is a place for introverts

much easier to manage then normal social interaction

@Magisch and practice

12:24 PM

Also in many ways we get the contexts we interact with people

except facial expressions

but on the topic of having almost no emotions from before, is that normal?

define normal first

@Termatinator well

I KNOW THIS SOUNDS TERRIBLE

but it can be a phase

or just you

or you just express/experience things that way

@Cashbee what most people do, or a large minority. I can also ask "is that weird"

or your life just is that boring

I had a phase when I was like that.

then I had an emo phase

now, IDK. I have days? ;p

12:32 PM

it's just me, my whole life, and emotions

I don't really have a boring life

and can a phase really engulf 19 years

but I wouldn't consider myself emo

sure

Mine only lasted about... 7?

But that's a thing.

This is who you are

Not anyone else.

people online already started calling me human-computer lol

As someone who has hung around strange enough places on the internet that I don't want to be specific... ;p

Everyone's different. At the end of the day, you're the product of your genes, your experiences, and everyone around you

true, I just think in black and white, wrong on my part, so that's a bit of a problem

1:12 PM

Morning all. I'm off from work this morning because I have a cold/sore throat and I am still scrambling to catch up to statistics

@ElizB Hey girl! Oh no :( hope you'll be better soon!

@ElizB I am going to complain to several virus scanner companies. Seems like everyone on SE is coming down with colds and sore throats world wide! :P

Other than that, i enjoyed Anastasia yesterday afternoon immensely.

@avazula I hope so too, i've been taking care to have lots of water and tea, and sleep as much as I can

@Tinkeringbell hahaha yeah, it's that time of the year

@ElizB :)

I'm lucky, I haven't been sick yet. Which is very unusual of me xD

@avazula i know it's gonna mess with my head as I try to study statistics today

1:15 PM

I tend to have lots of colds (like, 6-8 per year)

@ElizB oh yea, that sounds painful :/

@avazula Yikes, i usually have only one or two

@avazula not painful, just confusing hah

@avazula I usually have one per year, but a very long one

with that I mean the cold

@Termatinator erh :/ mine last about 3 weeks

@avazula I once had one for 3 months

o_o

1:20 PM

i don't know how long this one will last. it feels like it won't be more than a week or two depending on if I start coughing. I've been doing my best not to because I know if I start coughing, things get worse

user15026

2:16 PM

@ElizB feel better!

thesecretmaster

2:31 PM

@avazula ?

@thesecretmaster Hey there :) That's nothing, I was just wondering if you were by any chance the person in charge of the new-questions bots but 1/ that'd be a lot with the comments bots and 2/ Mith already told me you indeed weren't :)

thesecretmaster

Yeah, the feeds are built into the SE system. Actually, as an RO, you're allowed to manage them here if you want to check it out.

@thesecretmaster Wooh! Thanks for the insight!

thesecretmaster

No problem

@Ash thanks, working on getting good foods and drinks and not rushing myself. Making soup now, just a classic chicken noodle soup but no chicken

Q: Does this post provide an answer or is it missing the point of OP's question?

2:37 PM

@ElizB "chicken noodle chickenless soup"

Introverted Meta Man.

0

In the recent question "How do you tell a Facebook friend that they might be on the autism spectrum?" the currently most upvoted answer is giving the same instant response I'd have given before reading more than the headline. The answer says that OP should not tell their friend that they are aut...

discussion specific-answer

2:58 PM

@avazula haha yeah

soup feels fantastic for my throat. it's not hurting terribly right now but it feels icky.

@ElizB do you have some tiger balm you could massage your breast with? Helps a lot opening sick lungs

@avazula it's upper respiratory, and it's only day 2 of this cold. it's not feeling that badly congested

still, thank you for the suggestion, i've been meaning to get tiger balm since forever

@ElizB Huh, okay :)

No problem dear

my general symptoms are just tiredness and icky feeling in my throat, slightly runny nose. Very mild cold, this is.

@ElizB just don't rub it directly below your eyes. Hurts a lot. can confirm

3:09 PM

@Cashbee yup. But you seem to be weirdly shaped Cash, I said on the breast. Don't you have any neck o_o? :p

I've had a bronchitis last week. my breath is still rattling.

@avazula What no I'm just saying :)

@Cashbee hahaha :)

@Cashbee Ouch. I'm glad you feel better.

@Cashbee oof, that's not fun. :P

@Cashbee Yikes, feel better! :/

@ElizB well it was fun. as a dare. painful but fun x) ah the stupid things done by youngsters..

@ElizB thanks, you too

@Cashbee ah, goodness...

4:31 PM

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...I was literally in the middle of doing that

:P

I was faster XD

And I was just thinking of doing it. ;P

hahaha

interpersonal.stackexchange.com/questions/19360/…

Started reading that and now all I can think is "Wow, Bob and Alice are such terrible people, they're always coming up in these questions."

Why do we use Bob and Alice specifically for unnamed people anyway?

4:41 PM

@Anoplexian There's actually a wikipedia page on that!

> Alice and Bob are fictional characters commonly used as placeholder names in cryptology, as well as science and engineering literature. The Alice and Bob characters were invented by Ron Rivest, Adi Shamir, and Leonard Adleman in their 1978 paper "A method for obtaining digital signatures and public-key cryptosystems."[1]

> Subsequently, they have become common archetypes in many scientific and engineering fields, such as quantum cryptography, game theory and physics.[2] As the use of Alice and Bob became more popular, additional characters were added, each with a particular meaning.

(Source)

I thought they were just random names. I remember growing up "Jane" and "John" were the go-to names for anonymous persons. I'm definitely going to read up on that page.

Bob and Alice just seem to get up to all sorts of trouble though.

I think Jane and John Doe are generally used for unidentified dead bodies?

El'endia Starman

@Tinkeringbell Oooh I'm liking this "Character Cast"!

@Tinkeringbell I've seen those used for unidentified patients in general.

> "John Doe" and "Jane Doe" (for females) are multiple-use names that are used when the true name of a person is unknown or is being intentionally concealed.[1][2] In the context of law enforcement in the United States, such names are often used to refer to a corpse whose identity is unknown or unconfirmed. Secondly, such names are also often used to refer to a hypothetical "everyman" in other contexts, in a manner similar to "John Q. Public" or "Joe Public".

> There are many variants to the "John Doe" and "Jane Doe" names, many others such include "John Roe", "Richard Roe", "Jane Roe" and "Baby Doe", "Janie Doe" or "Johnny Doe" (for children).

(Another Source)

So yeah, it depends a bit on if you're writing fictional characters (Those should be Bob and Alice) or obfuscating real names (then you should use Jane and John Doe) :P

I mean in the context of dead bodies sure. xD

Wait

Then shouldn't we use John and Jane?

4:47 PM

@Anoplexian I was just typeing 'we need to write a meta on correct use of those XD'

The Unidentified Party Name Fandom (UPNF) is heating up.

Ha, title it "You're using the wrong name!" @Tinkeringbell.

@Anoplexian Hahaha I guess people would start another mutiny if I'd be that pedantic ;)

Also... I don't know. I don't feel up to combing through over 2000 questions and 5000 answers just to correct every instance of 'bob' and 'alice' :P

(Excuse me, over 10.000 answers. )

@Tinkeringbell I heard 'mutiny!' The time is now!

Trust you to pop in when I say that.

Well, try it :P

Come on, I'm waiting! XD

Uh

Everyone! Let's, um, answer questions without providing sufficient backup!

That'll show her!

4:52 PM

I have unlimited delete votes and I can just filter the answers by newest.

NEXT! :P

heck

that probably works against my next suggestion, to create a bunch of yes/no questions or "what should I do?" questions, too...

Maybe I'll talk like a potty mouth in chat!

Chat suspensions are still working too :P

I mean, maybe we all will!

It's a mutiny after all!

I can freeze the room. Make it private. Kicks all of you out XD

See the oppression inherent in the system! :o

4:55 PM

Hehehe :P

I won't though. Some CM would probably demote me

El'endia Starman

If ya can't beat 'em, join 'em!

...is it still a mutiny after that point?

Aha! So that's how we do it!

@El'endiaStarman Then it's a party! :-D

parties are okayish.

As long as I'm not the one used as waitress

@Tinkeringbell You're on cleanup duty.

Oh that's okay. I can just party, go to sleep and clean up the next day (or the day after the hangover clears)

4:57 PM

I used to volunteer cleanup duty for a hourly wage

@Tinkeringbell I might be bad at mutinys. :-P

people liked someone could be relied upon to stay sober and clean up and I got to hermit-mode all the party time and get paid

@TheTinyMan Nah, I'm just too good at them XD

@Magisch That's not a bad idea xD

For the mutiny, I suggest that we all flag, review and close things by our own, we gonna show those mods that we don't need them!

(oh, wait!)

El'endia Starman

5:00 PM

@Noon (They would actually like that.)

@El'endiaStarman (I know, that's why I suggested it :P )

actual work? hiss

5:19 PM

@Tinkeringbell hem hem... O:)

gparyani

6:55 PM

Oops, sorry.

Q: How to deal with pople who think staying a virgin until marriage is wrong or odd

7:23 PM

0

I know that people have thir own points of views according to ifferent cultures and so on, but how can i deal with people who outwardly come to you and find it wrong or a problem or jus odd that you wih to stay a virgin until marriage?

cultural-appropriation

Q: Confused on whether I should or shouldn't try to start a romantic relationship with friend of a girl who friendzoned me

10:50 PM

0

I am writing this under an alt for obvious reasons. (19M) Here is some context: So there's this girl (let's call her Jane, not her real name) whom I know from my old university (due to how university admissions work in my country, I could transfer to a university closer to home, and so did she ...

relationships