@KajHansen I think a lot of people goes through this. I haven't yet. I find questioning out existence very crucial and dangerous at the same time; the way we act and the things we believe in depends entirely on the mental image of the person we strive to be. So why strive to be that person and not someone else? These are murky waters I haven't bogged myself down to yet. There's no knowing whatever darkness lies at the pit of our minds; it's so much better to believe in something and move on.
I am sure you'll get better soon.
I have gone through depression, though not quite of this sort, and I have found mathematics helps me get over it. To me mathematics is sometimes a living being, a friend at need, helping you out from your miseries (sometimes the cause too, when you realize you suck at it!)
here's something. I don't claim that's helpful but, there's the man talking whose ideas changed my views about some things, I suspect forever. also whenever he says "art", I include "mathematics" in it.
I myself have never had depression, but I'd like to think that I know some of what you are dealing with, @KajHansen. I was bullied when I was younger for being "different" and "nerdy" and there wasn't much I could do about it. I don't think I was depressed, but I certainly thought a lot about things, and questioned things a bunch. So, all my sympathies to you, and there is a light at the end of the tunnel, and you will reach it.
Thanks @MikeMiller, I really appreciate the offer @BalarkaSen, that was fairly insightful despite not having yet been bogged down. If I can thoroughly distract myself with figuring out the details of a proof or idea, I find that a ton of negative energy takes a backseat for that moment of time.
If I may be permitted to glom onto the train of support, @Kaj...it's something I've dealt with myself. Both the events of my life and my MO itself have lent themselves to a significant depression. What I've found to be the cures are expression and creativity. Whether that's writing, music, visual art, or mathematics--that queen of creative endeavors--these things will do wonders. And not just as a distraction--they allow you to confront those dark corners of the mind and create beauty.
I asked that because I didn't have a clue about it - and was interested in seeing a worked solution... I thought perhaps it was interesting enough to be of interest to someone, but i've been down voted on it
I guess I have grown spiritual in some sense while dealing with my issues (the details of which are too personal to be of any interest). I am not ashamed of it; I strongly believe human being cannot live with bare, naked logic without emotions. As we progressed, as science progressed, we went through war and blood. Two world wars have passed and perhaps, god forbid, we're on the verge of a third. I am not sure how I feel about any of it.
@BalarkaSen I will contend that logical positivism did far more harm than good. Our problems can't be solved by cold logic alone. We must listen to our hearts as much as our minds.
creativity and our soul/heart is what makes us human. logic is something a computer can do. we can do more than that. a computer cannot empathize, or believe, or hope, or pray, or dream, or any of those things that make life worth the living.
Oh that - just the way you kinda humble bragged then said you'd gone through "200 pages of rigorous LA" in the day sounded like BS, I'm doubting anyone can get through a difficult LA book in a day - axlers ~200 pages I think, I dont' think anyones doing that in a day. Basically
A piece of wire 29 m long is cut into two pieces. One piece is bent into a square and the other is bent into an equilateral triangle.
(a) How much wire should be used for the square in order to maximize the total area?
I thought the answer was: 29cm due having to use the whole wire to maximize ...