While diagnosing things like a depression is not something you can do online (as you write), you do have a point. It does seem OP and wife need professional help, but from my experience, not taking on all blame is a good start.The wife seems to doing very little to save the relationship (because she cannot or does not want to, we don't know), and that's no way to have a relationship between adults. —
sleske 1 min ago