Has the quality of the questions we've been getting deteriorated over the last few months?

Maybe it just seems to me like that

@Adi school semesters?

@Adi It feels like this to me too.

Dangnabbit. All of my usual websites are getting power-mitm'ed and are refusing to load

@MarkHulkalo Wat

@Adi some are next-level terrible

@DavidFreitag Don't mind him, it's a typical screen starer day.

@DavidFreitag Can't connect to most websites without installing a certain SSL certificate. And most are blocked... So block block blkcknbkoxkkvkkdkkxksjs

@MarkHulkalo Sounds like you got some malware there friend

And the sites are blocking css files.... So they never properly load

No, corporate access restrictions and firewalls

@MarkHulkalo Sounds like Https everywhere getting all up in your shit

And not enough buffalos

I bet it's Digital Gonorrhea: The noisy killer.

Can't search google securely

@DavidFreitag that's not https everywhere

@Ohnana No, it's not, but when https everywhere forces a page to load in https when it really doesn't need to be...

It's not https everywhere

For example, when I browse DigiKey it doesn't need to load in https which causes chrome to block unencrypted scripts

It's https nowhere, diaf, gtfo TBH

pls dovid that's MitM everywhere

LMFAO

MITM everywhere lmao

Exactly

MitM is also my name when I'm with two ladies.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

@MarkHulkalo Have you tried loading the sites with http instead of https? No? You can't? It's because of https everywhere.

@Simon that implies that one of them is... never mind

I don't have https everywhere installed, though. Corporate blocks all https connections unless you install their certificate. That is enabled by default on IE

It's like SE, if you try to use https everywhere the entire login system is fubarred

wot

@DavidFreitag or because they automatically upgrade requests?

@Ohnana rofl

Crap you're right, that would imply that.

@MarkHulkalo So don't use SE

One of them is pegging him?

Unless she's just playing with my hair.

@Ohnana https everywhere auto redirects unless you change the default for athat site

@Simon what hair tho

pls the head type of hair

@Ohnana The forest below the belt

SEE, IN FRENCH WE HAVE TWO DIFFERENT WORDS FOR BODY HAIR AND HEAD HAIR

@DavidFreitag yes, but multiple websites auto-upgrades connections too

trello for one

YOU SILLY ENGLISH MONGS

Well, I want to use Firefox, or chrome... But internet explorer is a terrible evil invented by the devil to tempt people into being bad at websurfing

YEAH UNSTAR THAT YOU MONG

@Simon I bet it was you that starred it

@Simon i didn't want the atom.io package to fall off the star board

@Ohnana They need to add that to VS

@Ohnana That is pure badassery!

Sublime Text 3 doesn't look as cool now.

What language is that in the gif?

It makes my brain hurt

Probably hipster language #3.

I wanna say it's rust but I don't think it is

@DavidFreitag coffeescript

@Ohnana It makes my brain hurt

@DavidFreitag dont' use it?

dont' pls ohnuhnuh

@Ohnana It makes my brain hut that something like that even exists

I can't even imagine what must go on in the mind of the person who designed the syntax for that language

Well, have you seen BrainFuck?

BF is an esoteric language on purpose

brainfuck is trying to be bad, coffeescript is trying to be good

^

Like Java? The most consistently annoying dependency hunt ever

I've never had to hunt for deps

In Java?

Then you haven't really used it

In any language

Try Java

@MarkHulkalo 'Scuse me? In Eclipse, you literally right click the class it can't find and choose to import it.

I would rather try coffeescript

@Simon pls he programs with notepad

Hahaha.

@Adi Yes, you're not here so much so it shows. I'm not joking ;)

@Simon yeah, that's not working.

@MarkHulkalo You done fucked something up

Right? I'm switching to RAD, because I have to

@MarkHulkalo I've spent 3 years doing Java at school and not even once Eclipse didn't automagically import the class after asking him to do so.

Yes, him, he was a great bud.

Have you used RAD?

MISSSS YOUUU

RSA, I mean

The fuck is RSA?

See, IBM made an eclipse clone with new features

The crypto or that's an IDE?

@Simon Dat automagic

It costs like 5k USD

PLS WHY WOULD YOU USE THAT

ECLIPSE IS FREE AND FANTASTIC

@MarkHulkalo Link?

Rational Software Architect

@Simon Well I wouldn't say fantastic...

No idea. New to Java.

Just spent 60 minutes loading a project. Wewt

@MarkHulkalo So it's going good then?

All I'm trying to do is upgrade from 1.5 to 1.8

And it's spitting out pea soup and turning it's head

beans soup, surely?

tildol pls

@MarkHulkalo Oooh pea soup? Delicious.

In eclipse, this is easy

Argghhghg Harvey HD HD HD RFD Essa 6es TX

Is he having a seizure? I think he's have a seizure.

too much Java?

Must be a caffeine overdose :b

maybe that's his password :)

@TildalWave I learned how to formulate my passwords when I played a paladin in WoW

By banging my face into my keyboard

/faceroll

I had a grand maul seizure

Grand maul because I mauled the monitor

Did you film it? I would pay money to watch the hulk have a seizure.

LOL

@MarkHulkalo so your monitor was crying for help

@Ohnana Not anymore.

Lol

loL

@Simon pu tuhS

You're next

You really wanna get rekt, son?

@Simon You have an army? We have a Hulk.

I got my ween, it's as good as an army.

An army of bacteria

slams Simon left and right ...Puny ween

army of smeg :)

@MarkHulkalo LOL I was hoping for that

What a ton of pls coming on your way, lads.

@TildalWave System.out.projectileVomit(everything);

pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls pls

flegged

@Simon it's OK, you're forgiven.

flegged 4 benned

Forgiven 4 wot u mong

@Ohnana ohs noes nots a flegs

"pls" x 1000 = begging forgiveness

o pls you don't even know the real meaning of pls

Perverted Lycanthrope Sauce?

n

👵 👨

ghey

Puny Lobster @Simon?

@MarkHulkalo Don't you emoji at me.

Are those emojis?

Did I really install emojis on this PC?

Wtf is wrong with me?

@Simon I dunno

I certainly didn't install any emojis

@Simon comes standard with windows

unicode stuff

o I did install unicodes

buttcode stuff

and pls am not on windoze

@Simon did you install a meta-package called recommended extras?

🍉 🌲 🎄 🎄 🚗

wot I dunno

But I can see donuts: 🍩

😔 🔫

there are ttf packages that are usually a dependancy to other packages

@MarkHulkalo You used a menorah and a square to cut down two trees and put them on your car?

🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩🍩

Donuts for everyone!

😔 🔫 Goodbye cruel DMZ

@MarkHulkalo o/

all I see is boxes, which is surely an upgrade to whatever you're trying to say with unicode :P

pls

@MarkHulkalo it's not cruel, @kalina is elsewhere.

@TildalWave Gun to the head

yeah I figured as much

😔 = :(, 🔫 = gun

@RоryMcCune Haha

God I really really enjoy pendulum

@TildalWave wtf

like this?

what logo is that

frustrated tildol

personalized emoticons

@TildalWave That's soo messed up

@TildalWave NEERD

@Ohnana That's his logo

@DavidFreitag hehe that's kinda the point :P

You have succeeded in internetting too hard today, @Tilda

wot so soon? I just started

If you lads were a woman, would you be the slutty type?

I bet I would be.

@Simon i'm already the slutty type

o

it's a state of mind, not being :o

I bet my pls dance would bring all the boys to the yard

@Simon I would probably be too busy enjoying the fact that I had boobs.

I'd be conservative as heck and never let any guy touch me unless he put a ring on it and married me

@MarkHulkalo You're only saying that after reading that STD horror story imgur post

which frankly I understand cause that shit's terrifying

What's the story again?

Some dude gave this chick type 2 herpes in her throat and on her genitals and it's incurable

10/10 would kill myself

10/10 would go to jail for penis removal

holy fuck y'all are dramatic

No, because men in general don't respect women

o pls

@Ohnana If someone knowingly gave me an incurable disease and didn't even have the common decency to tell me?

would you guys seppuku over diabetes or something?

pls diabetes

@Ohnana Yeah, if someone gave it to me I'd cut that bitch like a fish

Diabetes wouldn't affect my sexual life.

@Simon Yes it would, you'd have to buy diet edible underwear

wot

@RоryMcCune :(

@kalina :op

@RоryMcCune What a fat nose.

your nose is literally the size of your tongue

And look at those eyes.

I don't think anything is that small

@kalina It's theorized that the whole of existence is composed of "strings" that are approximately that small, but slightly larger.

But have you ever felt like if you were chained to a dead camel?

is that what having a penis feels like?

n

@Simon Once, but it turned out that I was actually chained to a dead Camel.

o

@kalina No, it feels like always having a squirt gun whenever you want one

Let's talk about something else

n

You don't like talking about penises?

WEEEEEEEEEEN

Penises are love, penises are life.

@Simon Quite literally "The giver of life"

Yes, yes.

So why would we not constantly talk about weens?

@DavidFreitag one of two givers

@Ohnana Wait you mean there is another?

@DavidFreitag i think the uterus has a non trivial role in all of this

It might be doing something but definitely not as much as the ween.

@Ohnana Are you sure? Because I thought the stork just showed up one day...

@DavidFreitag What you do with the stork is your own business.

I'd travel the world with a stork.

@ThomasPornin FYI for anyone interested, storks do bite. Quite hard in fact.

It's a bird you mong.

Find a single bird that doesn't bite hard for its size.

Still hurts.

OF COURSE IT HURTS

THEY HAVE A STRONG.JPG BEAK

Well i would hope so, with all the babies they carry around

Women have it much harder. Childbirth ain't easy

Same with carrying them. I got punched when my wife was in labor, and I said, "You know, this doesn't seem so bad." knuckle sandwich

@MarkHulkalo Did she punch you in the balls?

+ broken hand ✋

pls men have to wait for a long time at the hospital and sit on a shitty stool

@Simon Bring a pillow and a gameboy, problem solved.

I say dem ladies have it easy, they just lay on a bed and enjoy life.

@DavidFreitag punched in the jaw

@Simon Uhhh? Something tells me you're a virgin. Actually your ween is so small, it probably didn't count. So you'd be a virgin no matter what.

ok

>:[ ]

@MarkHulkalo Dude he lives with his gf...

Maybe she's Japanese, they like smaller things.

Maybe they're technically celibate?

Ooooooooh snap

@kalina Can verify this I think.

/hugs copper iud

childbirth gives me the fucking cold sweats

@Simon How rude!

@Simon you realise you're just insulting yourself here?

@Ohnana You're a female?

I thought you were a guy, lol

@MarkHulkalo for all intents and purposes i am a guy IRL

Oh, sex change?

unfortunately fate has equipped me with the "bleed every month and childbirth" package

Or your woman has the iud

first one

Oh, right.

@MarkHulkalo Wait you mean you don't have both sets of genitals?

We save a lot of money on pads for my wife

I knock her up so we save money on pads and birth control

TMI man

@MarkHulkalo have you run a cost-benefit analysis on that one?

And the tax refunds mean $$€$$€$$$$$$$$$$$$

Yep. Hand me down clothing.

Food is easy. Clothing and toys can be reused. Tax benefits are enormous. Up to a $26k return next year.

@Ohnana He never said they had to keep the kids.

@MarkHulkalo holy shit

so that's why so many people have so many kids

@DavidFreitag ROFL . Dying km a meeting. Laughing internally.

Just leave them wrapped in a blanket in a basket outside a firehouse.

you'd think after two they'd have their fill

@Ohnana Kids = huge tax breaks. Medical bills, moving expenses, etc.

Child care expenses. Retirement contributions, et al.

@MarkHulkalo How many kids do you have? Not including the bun in the oven

2

Presuming it's one bun in the oven and not like 8

No bun in the oven :(

Well get on it

Here, tax breaks even for low income folks are fairly small. Get to any sort of income levels and no tax breaks. At all. Just costs.

Just saying

and somehow we can never find the money for sex ed and subsidized birth control...

muricaaaa

@RoryAlsop Yeah but you also get paid more

She was 2 weeks late, then it's surprise motherfugger, period.

There goes next years tax break.

hey @Simon your music skills are lookin' redundant, siri can beatbox...

@MarkHulkalo Not if you hurry.

@DavidFreitag not for having them

@RoryAlsop I meant your salary you boob

ooo the bear does astronomy too, why am I not surprised :D

Doesn't stop kids costing tens of thousands

@DavidFreitag not in software Dev, US gets paid more than UK by a decent margin for that profession

@TildalWave BEAAAAAARS IIIIIIIIIIINNN SPAAAAAAAAAAAAACE

@RoryAlsop I'd heard that the cost to 18 years was ~ £200k

@RоryMcCune 18 years of experience?

@RоryMcCune total estimates in the USA is 1 mil per kid

I really don't want to hear anyone complaining about money.

lost wages, school, opportunity costs, etc

Or of child care expenses?

@MarkHulkalo no, the cost of raising a kid in the UK from birth to 18 years old averaged at £200,000

but this may just be another random Internet stat...

@RоryMcCune 68% of all statistics are made up on the spot

Well, maybe you guys view it differently. I had a super shitty life growing up. So did my wife. Our kids have great lives, and we don't view them as lost wages, opportunity costs, etc

To us, that is all we really need or want.

We both agreed on this

@MarkHulkalo well yeah. your kids are worth the money to you because it's something you want

@DavidFreitag telegraph.co.uk/news/uknews/11360819/… <-- I was £30k under in my estimate

@Ohnana pls, having kids is like genetic stockholm syndrome

@Ohnana of course. And they aren't expensive

and that's cool, but these are practical things you have to think about... because if shit goes sideways the great lives y'all have will be a figment

@RоryMcCune don't you have a few

@Ohnana oh hells no, we have two cats, and that's expensive enough

LOL

@RоryMcCune :thumbs:

Sharing toys, reusing clothes, etc. We have 300+ pairs of clothes between them. Total cost $300 or less.

@RоryMcCune Rofl

@MarkHulkalo There's also goodwill, that shit's free

@DavidFreitag no it isn't. you still have to pay for shit

I wish my parents knew what goodwill was when I was a kid, then I'd have had something to play with other than myself

@Ohnana That's true, but... We're working on getting my wife through college.

ROFL

2015.zeronights.org/materials.html <-- impressive looking set of presentations