The DMZ

JukEboX

16:00

@MarkHulkalo lol

Iszi

One of these days, someone's gotta take a bunch of "cyber-" news clips and replace "cyber-whatever" with "cybersex-whatever". Bet that'll blow up on YouTube.

Ohnana

china is cybersex-attacking the united states

Simon

o no it's her

Ohnana

ISIS hit by wide cybersex epidemic at the hands of anonymous

Mark Hulkalo

lmfao

kalina

16:03

GSG cybersex stalk ISIS

gathering cybersex intelligence

Iszi

"Obama is expected to sign off on new cybersex security legislation today."

Ohnana

i'm getting a master's in cybersex and homeland hugging

kalina

cybersex warfare

a cybersex terrorism attack

Mark Hulkalo

cyberwarfare is pretty fun though

Iszi

"Anonymous performed another DDoS as a cybersex protest..."

Mark Hulkalo

16:05

LOL

kalina

cybersex monday, the monday after black friday

6

Iszi

@kalina WINNER!

Simon

o yes do the pls dance real good

do it hard

5

Ohnana

glorious

Simon

16:27

@kalina kalinuh pls buy me da west africa vst

and da strings

and massive

ok just buy me komplete 10 pls ty

kalina

er... no

Simon

YOU SUCK

kalina

also what would you actually do if I did?

Simon

I'd record myself stuffing donuts in my mouth until none can fit.

AviD

Thats a lot of donuts.

Also, I am assuming that "donuts" here is a euphemism.

Simon

16:30

NO IT'S NOT

AviD

Hmm. I'm not convinced.

Simon

It can be Timbits too.

AviD

I would ask for proof, but I'm worried that you will show me, and I will be right.

I will accept a shipment of Timbits as valid proof.

Note, I mean fresh donuts from Timbits, and NOT Tim's bits.

Mark Hulkalo

Timbits... we call them munchkins or donut holes around here.

@AviD It's too late. Tim's bits are on their way to your address.

Simon

A donut hole would be nothing you mong.

AviD

16:33

@MarkHulkalo well, timbits is kinda the brand name for donut holes from Tim Hortons.

@Simon no, the holes went somewhere, obviously

Simon

A HOLE IS EMPTINESS

Mark Hulkalo

We eat the emptiness.

It becomes a Timbit, a munchkin, or a donut hole.

AviD

@Simon oh crap, are you about to start talking about your broken heart and loneliness?

Mark Hulkalo

Also, my mother-in-law ringing me off the hook at work every day is starting to drive me nuts.

AviD

If you start singing us Taylor Swift songs I will kick you, so help me @Rory.

kalina

16:34

@Simon that's... attractive

Rory Alsop

@Simon should have bought it on Black Friday - really good deals

Simon

@RoryAlsop Komplete 10 was not on sale :(

kalina

@RoryAlsop Komplete is already a bargain, I doubt it was on sale

Simon

And it's 499 USD which is 634 CAD.

ffffffffffuuuuuuuuuu

Rory Alsop

@kalina Wasn't that the one I posted a link up about last week. Maybe wasn't a Black Friday sale, but awesome deal, I thought

Mark Hulkalo

16:36

Shouldn't they be cheaper on Cyber monday?

Which is today

kalina

I duno but yeah, it's good value for money

it's like €15000 of stuff for €1000

Simon

I bet I wouldn't use half of them though.

kalina

well value is relative

Simon

But I won't know until I play with all of them.

kalina

no, and when you wouldn't be able to buy 10 copies of MASSIVE for the price you're paying for MASSIVE + another 40 things...

I spent like a week mentally cataloging everything after I installed it

bongo \o/ BONGO \o/ bongo \o/ BONGO \o/ snare \o/ another snare \o/ wub \o/ wubwub \o/ waub \o/ waaab \o/ WAAAAAAAAAAAAHWUBWUBWUBWUB \o/

this is the best sounding bongo in the history of bongos

Simon

16:39

pls I want dem bongos and congas

I WANT SOME MARACAS AND SHAKERS TOO

TAMBOURINEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

kalina

I love going through my latest thing

I always end up writing like 15 new tunes

just from stuff like "oooo bongos"

bam, full arrangement

now where was I

oooh snares

Simon

It sucks how I consider buying software a waste nowadays.

AviD

@kalina I'm the king of bongo

kalina

OH MY GOD THAT PIANO SOUNDS AS GOOD AS MY N1

redoes piano in a few tracks

AviD

yaaaay, I get to learn all about Android billing and in-app purchases.

Simon

16:41

@AviD Shush, you're the king of your pyramid.

AviD

at least its not the ad network functions.

Simon

I MISSPELL AND FORGET WORDS CONSTANTLY TODAY

FFS

AviD

@Simon Bangin' on my bongo, I'm the king of bongo town.

kalina

since I'm definitely going to disagree with myself tomorrow, I wanted to take the opportunity to say that yesterday was the first time I've ever completed a mixdown in one sitting

it sounds above average today

AviD

@Simon "today"

kalina

16:43

no doubt it won't tomorrow

AviD

Bongo Bong Manu Chao Lyrics.mp4

►

bazinga.

Simon

NcT

kalina

you're not awesome enough to bazinga

AviD

anybody here have experience with android billings and such?

kalina

yes

Simon

16:43

@AviD Yes, I put my CC in and buy stuff.

kalina

^

AviD

@kalina pls, bazinga is like the least awesome thing I do. besides the pls.

Rory Alsop

@AviD hey, that ain't workin', that's the way you do it

kalina

@AviD s'all relative

AviD

@Simon @kalina pfft. I meant developing with it.

kalina

16:44

@AviD you're the one being ambiguous

Simon

@AviD You had to say that.

AviD

@RoryAlsop uhhm thats a different song, band, and genre... ?

Simon

It was confusing for us.

kalina

what kind of software developer are you?

I know, the one that is ambiguous

Mark Hulkalo

@AviD What kind of billings?

AviD

16:45

@kalina you're not wrong.

Mark Hulkalo

Google Play store?

Rory Alsop

@AviD exactly

Mark Hulkalo

Microtransactions?

Rory Alsop

but the lyric was almost correct

Simon

Microweens

AviD

16:45

@MarkHulkalo that too, I guess?

Mark Hulkalo

@Simon We don't need to know about your ween

AviD

I dunno, I'm digging in now

kalina

@Simon you don't help yourself at all

AviD

launchPurchaseFlow() and such.

Mark Hulkalo

@AviD What do you need help with more specifically?

kalina

16:46

@MarkHulkalo Android OS

Simon

@kalina I DON'T WANT TO HELP MYSELF I WANT KOMPLETE TEN

AviD

@MarkHulkalo nothing specifically. its a big topic, and I need the internals...

kalina

@AviD is one of those users who posts "please tell me how to security"

AviD

@kalina heh, OBVIOUSLY I didnt post that.

kalina

except in this instance it's "please tell me how to billing"

"I am using Android"

AviD

16:47

pls tell me any gotchas.

precisely the thing that you don't know what to ask.

kalina

@AviD you can't answer that, if you're a shoddy programmer then the occurrence of gotchas increases exponentially

AviD

the hidden trapdoors, the secret parameters, the undocumented functions.

kalina

and yet if anybody had started typing out a list of all of these things you'd already be bored and thus the entire exercise is useless

AviD

@kalina I dont think its a gotcha if you have no clue to begin with

kalina

as if your real motivation for even discussing it is so that we start believing you're no longer an Apple developer

AviD

16:49

@kalina I am NOT asking about anything specific

@kalina hahahaha

I actually had to learn a bit of objective-c last week.

I'm doing a tour-de-force of all the shadier parts of every programming language.

kalina

what do you want, applause or commiserations?

AviD

pffft

commiserations ... :-S

kalina

well tough

AviD

actually, its more like unspecific support.

kalina

I'm all out of commiserations

Mark Hulkalo

16:50

@AviD My condo lances.

kalina

I used them all on myself when I fell out of bed this morning

AviD

@MarkHulkalo I'll ping you when I hit a wall...

kalina

please hit it fast

AviD

@kalina ...

kalina

better explosion that way

AviD

16:51

@kalina I will NOT hit it!

@kalina no explosion for you...

kalina

fantastic, then you require no further support

Mark Hulkalo

@kalina Getting a little desperate are we?

kalina

#conversationOver

AviD

@MarkHulkalo heh, I was too vague, but you got it too :-)

kalina

I saw what you said

I had a brief lol but it was more out of pity

AviD

16:52

heh, I'll take it!

Mark Hulkalo

For a minute there, I thought the ":-)" was from kalina, and I was shocked

And started laughing, then looked closer and realized I'm still an idiot.

2

Ohnana

step one for doing anything on android: cry

step two: open android studio and cry again because you're writing java in a tool built on java

Mark Hulkalo

step 1: require application to request all permissions

step 2: rake in $$$$$$$$$$$$

AviD

@Ohnana for an OS built on Java

kalina

@Ohnana javaception

we heard you like Java

Mark Hulkalo

16:55

Java is only as good as it's programmers.

AviD

> WE BUILT THIS CITY... ON JAAAAVAAAAAAA COOODE

kalina

So we built an IDE in Java to write Java for an OS built on Java so you can Java while you Java for your Java.

Just add coffee.

Mark Hulkalo

If your developer blows chunks, Java is gonna blow chunks. No amount of features are gonna save you from a trash developer

No matter the language.

AviD

@MarkHulkalo this is always true. The question is, what happens when you have a good developer?

Ohnana

if you've ever looked at java and said, "damn, i want an entire developer stack built on that" then android OS is for you!

AviD

16:56

also, when you have a bad developer, just how bad is it? And how fast does it get that bad.

kalina

@AviD average

AviD

an average developer?

Mark Hulkalo

@AviD When you have a good developer, what happens is you cherish him... you give him tv, remote control, red dress... but if he cheat on you, THEN YOU WILL CRUSH HIM!!!!!

kalina

awesome developer, average code

I've just thought

@Simon is so slow he must also run Java

AviD

@kalina ah yeah.

Simon

16:57

pls

Mark Hulkalo

@AviD Bad developers create catastrophic security holes without even trying.

Ohnana

@MarkHulkalo "lemme just read this server variable into a string here... okay!"

AviD

@MarkHulkalo the worst developers are good coders who TRY to make the catastrophic security holes, thinking they are a GOOD thing.

Mark Hulkalo

@Ohnana Oh my goody-two-shoes, I hate that.

kalina

you're not allowed to hate on @Ohnana, it's one of the rules of the DMZ

you are now banished

Ohnana

16:58

:O

Mark Hulkalo

Who is hating on Ohnana?

kalina

leave this place

Ohnana

i had no idea i was so special to you all

Simon

his name is ohnuhnuh

kalina

you're not, be thankful to RNG

I pushed the button and you're the fireproof one today

AviD

16:59

@Ohnana nah, @kalina is just using you as an excuse to pick on @MarkHulkalo.

kalina

that too

Ohnana

@AviD figures

kalina

well, primarily that, actually

Mark Hulkalo

@kalina It's okay, let it all out.

Ohnana

too bad i have The Button rigged in my favor

kalina

16:59

...entirely?

AviD

@Ohnana tbf, I dont think it's actually that @MarkHulkalo is all that special either, she's just using him as target practice.

Mark Hulkalo

All the tireties.

Don't make me angry, kalina. You'd like me when I'm angry.

AviD

wow, that was close, I'd almost forgotten my domain admin password. That would like totally suck.

Mark Hulkalo

@AviD My favorite is if (isset($_GET['v'])) { eval(v); }

AviD

@MarkHulkalo that looks like PHP. how could that be your favorite anything??

Mark Hulkalo

17:02

Look at what the code does

Ohnana

@MarkHulkalo Shell Maker Pro 1.0

Mark Hulkalo

page.php?v=insert-malicious-code-here

@Ohnana Yeah, there are ways to do this in almost every language. It can be quite hilarious.

AviD

@MarkHulkalo but does PHP actually work like that? can you reference "v", when it should actually be "$_GET['v']"?

Rоry McCune

@MarkHulkalo eval == evil

Mark Hulkalo

In mIRC, if I recall correctly, it was something like ON *:MSG:*:{ // $+ $1- }

@RоryMcCune It's the debil

@AviD You can set it to a var, I was just typing it quickly.

AviD

17:04

@MarkHulkalo buuuuut you didnt.

Mark Hulkalo

FINE

AviD

nevermind, I was actually just verifying the little bit of PHP I know.

Mark Hulkalo

You're right, though

AviD

thought maybe there was some weird quirky syntax.

well, MORE weird quirky syntax, that I hadnt seen before.

Mark Hulkalo

With the mIRC one, all you had to do was something like /msg <username> /aux/aux (windows 98, crashed immediately)

Ohnana

17:05

@MarkHulkalo awkward

Mark Hulkalo

or even worse, /msg username write -c c:\windows\system.ini

Anything that allows you to execute arbitrary code is badzors :<

@Ohnana Why?

Ohnana

@MarkHulkalo ddos in a few chars

AviD

@Ohnana why ddos? just plain dos.

Mark Hulkalo

Yeah, lol. There was /aux/aux, and /con/con

Ohnana

@AviD y u so pedantic

jesus man get a hobby

AviD

17:12

12

Q: What is a DoS Attack and how does it differ from a DDoS attack?

Can some one explain to me the concept of Dos Attacks for web applications ? Also what is the distinction between Dos and Distributed Dos ( ie DDos) attacks ? Wikipedia says : In computing, a denial-of-service attack (DoS attack) or distributed denial-of-service attack (DDoS attack) is an a...

;-)

JukEboX

Shallow and Pedantic?

Mark Hulkalo

Even funnier, sometimes you could make the executing command output the BSOD results

So you'd see them spamming their BSOD message in chat

Ohnana

if i gave a rat's ass about your opinion I'd be offended right now

@MarkHulkalo LAWL

AviD

@Ohnana heh, I surely hope you ARE joking.

JukEboX

@AviD shameless rep question

AviD

17:13

@JukEboX not MY question

Ohnana

mod abuse incoming, tell my wife i'm not sure who she is

AviD

and as it goes, I think its a good question, I've seen many people confuse them and misunderstand the risks etc

Mark Hulkalo

Quit overflowing my buffalos

6

Wrong window, sorry

Barry Carlyon

lol

Mark Hulkalo

@BarryCarlyon Greetings

Barry Carlyon

17:17

Hi and Bye

Just leaving $dayjob :-P

So, um Bye all :-D

TildalWave

@AviD here's a name change that explains it all, use Disruption instead of Denial

Test: 1) I have denied @Simon's mom, 2) We have denied @Simon's mom, 3) I have disrupted @Simon's mom, 4) We have disrupted @Simon's mom. Which one is DoS and which one DDoS?

Mark Hulkalo

Anyone here know a thing or two about ActionScript?

In particular, NetworkInfo.findInterfaces();

TildalWave

@MarkHulkalo is that some Marvel character?

Mark Hulkalo

Because if I recall correctly, you can de-anonymize someone using this...

Can't test it here, though

TildalWave

you mean with flash cookies?

Mark Hulkalo

17:25

With AS3

Rory Alsop

@Simon youtube.com/watch?v=wB4RSKvufak

Simon

@RoryAlsop Ah yes, back he was with Subaru. Is he doing those jumps without a helmet?

Rory Alsop

@Simon looks like it

Simon

Ah he did have a helmet in the last sequence at least.

TildalWave

@MarkHulkalo I found this hackademix.net/2007/09/26/cross-browser-proxy-unmasking but it's not about NetworkInfo.findInterfaces();

Mark Hulkalo

17:35

Yea, but this is a browser's proxy settings, which isn't going to work against a VPN

TildalWave

and this adobe.com/devnet/air/flex/articles/… which is about network interfaces

Mark Hulkalo

But he's right in that you should turn those off

Because what he's missing is that Flash can poll your network interfaces. LIke all of them :x

Ohnana

@MarkHulkalo wtf why does it need that

Mark Hulkalo

help.adobe.com/en_US/FlashPlatform/reference/actionscript/3/…

Haha

TildalWave

you didn't check the second link ^ did you? It gets worse

Mark Hulkalo

17:43

@TildalWave I'm aware

TildalWave

you cold shoulder you! :)

Mark Hulkalo

BECAUSE I'M POSTING

Rоry McCune

@RoryAlsop I assume you're aware of batmetal?

Simon

MARKUS COME ON

YOU JUST ANSWERED ON A QUESTION FROM 2012

I WASN'T EVEN BORN IN 2012

Mark Hulkalo

CMN

It popped up on the main page

Simon

17:56

Do you think your wife would consider "Well, she was naked in front of me" a good reason to cheat on her?

I THINK NOT.

I typed "guys" instead of "think"

Man, I really think about men too often.

2

Mark Hulkalo

@Simon Maybe @Ohnana can help you with that?

Ohnana

:U

Simon

No he can't.

Because he will soon have his own ween.

To do the helicopter.

Mark Hulkalo

What

Simon

Markus pls you have so much to learn.

Ohnana

17:58

@Simon i have two weens already

one is floppy and the other is not

Simon

@Ohnana Wow @@@

One is to do le pee pee and the other one is to do le manly?

Ohnana

peeing ones are roughly ~100 USD so no!

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