YASSSS droid-life.com/2015/10/19/…

And my Fi sim kit is on the way too. I totally can't wait for $20/mo for cell service

dovid pls you're supposed to be super poor.jpg

Yes but saving $40/mo on cell service is a good thing

True.

Plus I can still sell my oneplus one on ebay for ~$150

@lady.donut ^ Did you hear that?

Which brings the price of my 5X down from a balmy $420 to a much more agreeable $270.

@Simon I still have all the original packaging. Apart from a few blemishes around the corners of the phone it's in awesome condition.

niice

She has dropped hers on the floor at least 138 times.

It's dented on the borders.

LULZ still just a few scratches

Because all I wear is basketball shorts, my phone just loves to slide right out of my pocket when I get out of my car

it's soft plastic

RIGHT on to the pavement.

Yeah pockets are evil.

The pockets in most of my shorts are juuuust big enough to contain the frozen waffle that is a oneplus one

Donuts are evil too. BAM "Me: What was that?" "Her: Your phone probably".

The worst one is when it slides out of my pocket into the bottomless crevice between the driver's seat and the center console

Then I spend the next hour and a half with a thousand feet of string with bubblegum stuck to the end to retrieve it

@lady.donut You're staring the most random things ever.

oh I do that with his cellphone too :3

:D

i'm being empathetic donut

@lady.donut Go cook my dinner instead, I'm hungry.

hides

@lady.donut the Deanna Troi of Donuts then?

@Simon Oh 'dis gon' be good.

@DavidFreitag see now they've both gone, you've gotta expect there's some throwing of pans or other such domestic turbulence

I'm at work she's at home.

@DavidFreitag what I mean to answer is too inappropriate for this chat

@lady.donut Messenger it!

@Simon pls what's with the impreciations of dinner cooking then?

@RоryMcCune I want it to be ready when I get home!

re-hides

coward

pls

LOL

I got the reply on Messenger, full of lulz.

I can somewhat censor it like this: "You can blow your whistle yourself".

:D

@Simon that doesn't sound inappropriate at all ...

You're right roro, you're right.

@RоryMcCune Domestic turbulence, nice

hey @lady.donut roro @RоryMcCune is the one who's taking walks in the hills and takes legit pictures.

@Simon Legit pictures with his phone.

Which completely floors me every time I look at them and remember that.

am jealous!

@lady.donut Me too right up until I remember that they have the shittiest internet... in the world.

we have had a really good autumn here

It's currently 3°C outside

@DavidFreitag She'd be complaining 24/7.

"da interwebz is le slow-"

And I'm wearing basketball shorts and a T-shirt

"my makeup video is le buffering-"

@Simon Also roro walks 20 bazillion miles to get his shots.

pfff you're the sissy

WAT

@lady.donut wat

WAT

#rekt

@RоryMcCune God damn it, so peaceful.

@Simon walking Bob do you know what that is?

@RоryMcCune That looks astonishingly similar to where I live.

@Simon yeah that's loch stroan down at my in-laws

@lady.donut What are you trying to say?!?!?

yep it's beautiful !

@DavidFreitag Dumfries and Galloway, south scotland

not so much in the way of big hills but still some nice scenery

@RоryMcCune It's far too brisk for me to go venturing outside, otherwise I could get some snaps too.

we have some pretty descent landscapes too but let's just say that sadly they're not at a walking distance

Yeah we have to drive up north ~40 mins.

Yep that sounds about right

Same here too

@Simon and more

@lady.donut and more

For roro that scenery is a 4 hour walk away

I live 5 mins away from what looks exactly like @RоryMcCune 's pic

@David- His name is roro.

rororoyourboat

banana roro

banana phone

........................

dovid dash pls

Has stupid banana phone song stuck in head now.....

Hahaha, whoops.

fml

YES

I was hoping to get someone.

This other one that does this to me is Scatman.

AM A SCATMAN

I lol every time.

i've been on three conference calls today keel me

ohnuhnuh pls

@Ohnana Didn't you say you work remotely?

@DavidFreitag I DO

go to meeting and skype

@Ohnana And somehow you thought you would get out of meetings altogether?

Was it a video call?

@Simon nah. still in my bathrobe

and under my blankets

Phew.

@DavidFreitag /o\

@Ohnana Lol, you must be getting used to this. Always take business calls in the nude.

@Ohnana Are you loading a pair of rocket launchers to fire at me?

wot

@DavidFreitag it is too cold for this

rule 34, cough cough

also i hate being naked

@Ohnana Because you don't like your body?

@Ohnana I have free heat, it's 27°C in my apartment.

so you can rock out with your cock out, but i'll be wearing my fluffy tardis bathrobe

@Simon that and i'm fucking coooooold

@Ohnana I tried cooking with spock out once and it ended painfully.

we had a goddamn freeze watch last night

IT IS GODDAMN OCTOBER

@DavidFreitag lmao

Yup and it's only 4°C outside right now

My donut keeps the temperature at like 21 Celsius in our apartment.

SHE MAKES ME FREEZE MY ASS OFF

@lady.donut BAD BAD BAD

Also TBH I'm not comfortable being naked. Boxers and a t shirt is where it's at

my apt is at 21 too... although we have to pay gas bills

When they first turned my heat on I cranked it to 30°C and sat there enjoying the shit out of myself

@Ohnana oh I'm the one who pays

While it was busy being 10°C outside

as well as for his 30 minute long showers

HEY

@Ohnana @lady.donut heat included in rent is where it's at.

30 mins is an exaggeration.

@lady.donut That greasy french-canadihuean needs that long to get fresh.

yup but we live in a crappy apartment, at least according to donut

NOT

All this temp in celsius makes me feel like the only American in here.

@David- You are.

@DavidFreitag my water is included

it's the shiiiit

@Ohnana I have heat and hot water.

And last night a third of me had a bath

@David- you're not

i live in NE USA

God please say they are not Canadians

eh?

@David- @Simon, his SO @lady.donut, and @ThomasPornin are all Canadihueans.

@Ohnana, I live directly to the right

OH CANADUH

what's does eh mean?

That explains so much

Oh and we all speak le French-.

@David- oh neat, bread basket or hipster wasteland?

@lady.donut pls

@Simon do you say eh?

@ThomasPornin Did dovid just resurect you?

DOVID YOU'RE A NECROMANCER!

@David- Also, I live in CT.

@Simon LET'S GO TO THE MALL

@lady.donut I think I do sometimes ô_ô

But it's more like "hein" than "eh"

@ohnana, IA, cornfield land. I live in the country thankfully

@Simon ben voyons

@Simon I was on holiday, as the picture demonstrates.

ben voyons di de dli don

@David- o man

@Simon @lady.donut ENGRISH PLS

@DavidFreitag "oh well"

@ThomasPornin I'm confused whether it's supposed to be a picture of you or you took a picture of a bear on holiday.

@Simon Eh.

@lady.donut Also, how's the bunny?

pls

@Simon Clearly it's a random picture of a random bear trying to defecate in the woods found on some random site on the internet.

I took the picture (last Thursday). That grizzly lives on top of Grouse Mountain, which overlooks Vancouver.

@ThomasPornin You went that far in the West? God damn.

Well he's not lying, google has no results for it.

@Simon That's almost as far as Europe, from Québec (about 5000 km).

@DavidFreitag he's doing good :) he made himself right at home, hopping on the sofa and stuff

@lady.donut That's awesome! :O

I want to get a corgy soooo bad

t's little butt lulz

But I'm so lazy

yup dogs are too high maintenance for my liking as well

I'd get a cat but I'm too affectionate for most cats I think

@DavidFreitag some cats are quite affectionate

@RоryMcCune Keyword there some. Last thing I want is to take ownership of a living creature only to realize it wants to kill me at every chance it gets

Also, I don't want that stink in my apartment.

Cat's are not affectionate. They are marking you with their scent to declare your their property.

My friend's parent's cats are all very affectionate. I would go over his house and at least one of them would book it for my lap and immediately give me that "PET MEEEEEEE" look

i love kitties :>

@David- pls, my kitties will often curl up on me and go to sleep

Living completely alone has its benefits but it gets a little stuffy sometimes

@DavidFreitag open a window/eat fewer beans

@RоryMcCune That's not what I meant, lol

Also, beans don't make me gassy, applesauce/apple juice will though.

If I eat buttered popcorn thats the fastest way for me to get single again

Even I don't want to be around myself

I have no life so bad that during the week I can't wait for the weekend, but during the weekend I can't wait for it to be monday so I have some human contact

@DavidFreitag You can have my problems instead. I try to stay single but women wont leave me alone. To have a weekend without human contact would be amazing!

@David- I will gladly trade lives with you. When is good for you?

No housewives of new jersey!

@David- so humble

I think one week on, one week off is the best plan of attack.

@Ohnana The exact opposite of me, really.

@DavidFreitag anytime! It's that time of month for the current one so defiantly anytime. She just want's to bleed, eat subway and watch chick shows. If I get her drunk she at least goes to bed early.

Thank god for alcohol

You're... kinda a terrible person.

sounds charming

jesus christ dude

Sometimes....

Is that sort of personality what girls like? Is that what I have been doing wrong all of these years?

@DavidFreita most of them

not all

@DavidFreitag good god no

@DavidFreitag usually their friends intervene

only desperate ones

@lady.donut If that were the case then I'd be happy to be forever alone

Being too nice usually lands you single or keeps you there.

@DavidFreitag OK, I keep seeing that on the starwall and reading "nipples" instead of "oneplus". It's very distracting.

unless you find a nice desperate fat chick

@David- ugh

@David- I doubt it has anything to do with how nice I am, and more to do with how far below the sea I live.

they like nice guys

oh so you are a jerk

thanks for clarifying

@David- good game

At times

I'm not going to lie, I am an asshole, but I don't get walked all over in life.

But I am not a complete POS

That being said though if someone wanted to drop fistycuffs I'd probably run screaming like a girl.

@DavidFreitag It's not really about being an asshole. It's really about confidence. Thats all you need.

So instead you drop that person who wants to fight, then the women swoon because you can protect them. It's biological

@David- I used to be shy, but then I learned that asking a girl to dinner was very easy: You ask and the say no. Once I realized that I stopped being shy.

@Davidf Don't just ask. Show them how amazingly amazing you are and that your giving them the privilege to go on a date with you. But don't talk about WoW.

@David- I'm not amazing, I'm ordinary. Going on a date with me wouldn't be a privilege, frankly it would probably be boring and super awkward.

@DavidFreitag or probably not

@lady.donut It's not like any of that stops me from trying

@DavidFreitag I dont believe you. You just need confidence to bring it out of you

@David- No, what I need is to stop living at the bottom of the ocean

Just get yourself out more and do more stuff. Then you have things to talk about and have in common

@David- i agree with that

If anything get them to talk but you just be the one to keep the conversations going. ask lady, women love to talk about themselves.

Next semester I'll be at university, that's probably a good bet

So just give them things to talk about.

That will help, you will find more things to do there

I think I have social anxiety

Should get me some xanax. Or something.

@DavidFreitag I used to. do a few shots then go out. or get som Xanax

@David- I wouldn't even begin to know where to go.

Eventually I'll probably break down and make a tinder account or something

@DavidFreitag don't mix booze with downers

@DavidFreitag Places with something you enjoy. Bar's, bookstores, the mall,

@Ohnana You mean don't mix downers with downers

@ohnana has a great point. One or the other not both

@DavidFreitag yes exactly

@xanax + alcohol = roofie

people don't always realize it, because booze makes some people louder and more boisterous

If it can help you relax just enough to relax.

But the more confidence you can build the less anxiety you will have.

Oooh I think that could make for a good time. Buy bananas, condoms, and a jar of vaseline. Throw out a bunch of the vaseline, half the condoms and three bananas and then roofie myself. Wake up ".... WTAF"

or you stop breathing and the cops find you "...WTAF"

I live at the bottom of the ocean, we don't breathe down here anyway.

I used to have bad anxiety, but I just forced myself to go out and be social. Then I lost a bunch of weight too which helped with my confidence. Now my confidence is great and I need to carry around a stick to keep women at bay and I am great at talking to them. If you can make them laugh when they are down and smile when they are sad they will love you.

@Ohnana Let's be honest here, I would be found by the apartment staff because I'm four months behind on rent

:|

@Ohnana You know, because I'm dead

Not because I don't pay my rent. Which I do.

@DavidFreitag you ever been to a strip club? They will help you with your confidence.

You sound like you need to go

Plus you can drink beer

but no xanax

@David- My dad took me to one on my 18th birthday, I ran out of fingers counting the bullet wounds

yes let's go to a pit of desperation

@Ohnana Desperation is a pretty good description of where I'm at

true, at least the other patrons could give you a little boost

Yeah, see the people there and suddenly stop being depressed and go outside and enjoy myself

It sounds crazy but they make good therapists sometimes when your at that point in life.

TBH I would be ruinously bored in a strip club

@DavidFreitag you don't go there for naked women. You go for the conversations

@David- That's the problem, I would find the most secluded location in the place and talk to no one

So force your self out of your comfort zone. Use alcohol if you have to. Change starts with you.

Yeah but my comfort zone is so fuzzy and comfy

Boobs in the face can be quite comfy

In a place like that? Who knows where they've been.

I just went to the strip club with my girlfriend on Saturday, and I didn't see a single naked girl there. I spent the whole time talking to the other customers. Me 10 years ago would have been like you said. In the secluded corner. The whole point is just have fun and find something to make you happy.

But you have to decided what makes you happy and do it.

@David- Your girlfriend went to a stripclub with you...?

Yeah?

@David- What would make me eternally happy is someone I can watch netflix with and cuddle to sleep.

@DavidFreitag Understandable. That would make me eternally happy, but you gotta get out there and find them and catch them and keep them first.

Kinda like pokemon

@David- Yeah that's a great topic to bring up on a date

but it would be a bad idea to just go randomly trap women in a ball

Would not go over well with the cops

@David- No the word you are looking for is "hysterical"

will you be my pikachu?

@Ohnana gets tasered

little electrostim in your day

I drank four cans of red bull already today, if I get any more stimulation I'll burst into flame

So you could be someones charizard

Yes, a flaming cuddly affectionate charizard

Actually, that's a good description because I have an abnormally high body temperature.

@ThomasPornin Exactly, a plane tickets is as expensive if not more. I'd much rather go to Europe but you've probably visited quite a few European countries.

@Simon I feel like an international flight over an ocean is more expensive on principle

@DavidFreitag On principle, yes.

In theory, nope.jpg.

ERM PRACTICE

fail

My hands are freezing but the rest of me is sweating

@DavidFreitag from where we are I believe going to vancouver is as much as going to paris

@LucasKauffman

I would like to live in a location that does not fall below 20°C that is not in America

Tijuana Mexico?

But at the same time I really would like to live in the Norway/Sweden/Finland/Germany area

So, Italian riviera during the winter and Norway during the summer

I want to live in Southern California.

I plan to move there in about 10 years

You wan't

YOU WANNOT SON?

@Simon Hey I add an apostrophe to that word sometimes too :b

@DavidFreitag But he edited the second sentence but not the first one!!!

:P~~~~~

@Simon Stop being a pedant.

@ThomasPornin Did you vote?

That's @AviD's job.

@DavidFreitag I'm not a peasant.

@Simon A member of the bloody proletariat.

@Simon Not yet.

This is scheduled for later this evening.

o

ewpls

Yep, chat got weird again.

o no it's roro