The DMZ

David Freitag

16:00

@Adnan Ah well, I guess it helps to RTFM once in a while.

Especially things of such a "sensitive" matter ;]

Simon

@DavidFreitag Is that "read the fucking manual"?

CodesInChaos

@Polynomial Depends a lot on context. If you have working auto-update, stapling is fine.

Polynomial

@CodesInChaos In this case I don't even think they know what stapling is ;]

CodesInChaos

securing auto-update is easier than security connections. You can keep the signature key offline, use multiple signatures, etc.

@Polynomial I didn't either. I was like: Fuck PKI, just hardcode the public key.

Simon

16:13

@CodesInChaos A/S/L?

Adnan

@Simon Still doing that?

Simon

@Adnan Only to people that matter.

@Adnan A/S/L?

Adnan

@Simon Awwww

Simon

And I'm still single, can you believe that?

To be fair it's only been a month.

Adnan

@Simon You'll have somebody in the next 4-6 weeks. Don't worry.

Simon

16:18

Meh, do I really want someone that soon? Not sure.

Adnan

@Simon THEN WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU WHINING ABOUT BEING SINGLE?!!!

Simon

@Adnan Because it sucks in a way.

Adnan

@Simon Or, rather, doesn't.

Simon

But so far it rocks more than it sucks.

@Adnan HEYOOOO

Haha.

kalina

Single is best

Scott Pack

16:23

You can break up. You can start dating somebody else. But they'll always take YOUR FREEDOM!!

Simon

@ScottPack This guy knows what's going on.

Adnan

@kalina Soo, he cheated on you?

Or, are you FA?

Simon

FA?

Polynomial

long term relationships ftw when you're with the right person ;]

6 years 2 months.

Adnan

@Simon Forever Alone. You should know that one.

Scott Pack

16:27

@Polynomial Clearly the solution to maintaining a healthy relationship is inhalation of incredible amounts of chlorine gas.

Adnan

@Polynomial Couldn't agree more.

Simon

@Polynomial GJ. If you're still smiling and happy about it after this long, it probably means she's the right one, yeah.

Unless she blew you 5 mins ago.

Alright, I'm sorry @AviD.

Polynomial

@ScottPack Definitely the chlorine.

Simon

@Adnan I should have known, yes.

Polynomial

@Simon haha I wish

I'm at work so teleblowjob would be a pretty epic invention

Scott Pack

16:28

Troof.

Simon

Nobody would ever get out of their home if that existed.

Polynomial

Every man would max out their credit card in a day.

Scott Pack

@Polynomial I'm at work too.

Simon

That too.

Polynomial

@ScottPack Ahh, wfh. I'm doing that tomorrow.

David Freitag

16:29

@Simon In this case? A little of both.

Polynomial

and Friday for that matter.

Simon

@ScottPack Sweet kitchen bro.

Polynomial

unfortunately a quick blowie might be a little awkward with all the builders wandering around

Adnan

@ScottPack Home-fried sperms?

Scott Pack

@Adnan wut?

Adnan

16:30

@ScottPack I detest putting my laptop on my, well, lap.

It heats up very quickly and it becomes very hot down there

Polynomial

hotwang.jpg

Scott Pack

@Adnan The bottom of this stays fairly cool, just the exhaust fan actually gets warm, that's at my knee.

@Adnan Also. I've already reproduced once.

Adnan

@ScottPack Hmm

David Freitag

@ScottPack Or, you've stolen a baby once.

Simon

I wish I was stolen by him :(

Scott Pack

16:34

@DavidFreitag I can speak fairly conclusively on from whence the child originated. I'm also fairly certain I was involved.

Adnan

@Simon creep alert

Simon

@Adnan Did I ever tell you that I love my new car?

Adnan

Well, that's sort of redundant, the @Simon itself should be enough as a creep alert

David Freitag

@ScottPack Of course you were involved, who else would steal an infant?

Simon

I hit 140 km/h on the 4th gear.

Scott Pack

16:35

What's that in big boy speed?

Simon

I was at 5.9k RPM and the red line is at 6k.

David Freitag

hahaha

Simon

Asshole, hang on.

Adnan

@Simon I don't understand cars :(

Simon

87 MPH.

David Freitag

16:36

@Adnan You are a guy and you don't understand cars?

Simon

@Adnan !!!!!!! How come?!?

David Freitag

@Simon pfft

Simon

@DavidFreitag ON THE 4TH GEAR DUDE.

David Freitag

Why would you ever do such a thing...

Simon

I had to shift or I was in the red line.

@DavidFreitag It's important to know your gears.

Alright, maybe not at that speed but WHATEVS.

Adnan

16:37

@DavidFreitag Yup, I'm not even remotely interested in them.

David Freitag

Although i can't say much, my car is electronically limited to 100mph

Adnan

@Simon Well, I know how an engine works, but that's general information.

David Freitag

@Adnan but wai they so cool?

Simon

How do you pick up the ladies?

You need a decent sport car.

Adnan

@Simon Bike.

David Freitag

16:38

@Simon Chloroform works great.

Simon

@Adnan Oh, that works too, as long as it has a motor.

David Freitag

But I'm sure you know all about that @Simon.

Adnan

@Simon Nope. Bicycle

Usually when I tell them to sit on the back "seat" of my bike they start laughing. Then when they see I'm serious, they think it's cute.

Simon

@DavidFreitag I created Chloroform.

Adnan

and we ride home.

It's kind of.. sweet.

Simon

16:39

@Adnan loooooooooooooool

David Freitag

@Adnan Must be awful awkward to do naughty things while on the highway..

Adnan

@DavidFreitag Good thing we don't have highways.

Simon

wat

David Freitag

@Adnan Finland doesn't have highways? Well fine, it makes it awkward to do naughty things in general then.

Adnan

@David @Simon Dudes, I live in a city of almost 60k people. It's very small.

David Freitag

16:40

@Adnan TWSS?

Adnan

@DavidFreitag Not whole Finland, just where I live.

Simon

@Adnan o

Well, I live in a city of 20k people (at my parents').

David Freitag

@Adnan Yes, but there must be highways leading away from where you live?

Simon

I take the highway daily.

Adnan

@Simon What else did I expect?

Simon

16:41

@Adnan fu

Jeff Ferland

Adnan

@DavidFreitag I'm only on a highway when I need to go to some other city, which I do quite rarely.

@JeffFerland YEEEEEEEEEEEEEAH! FINLAND!!!!

David Freitag

@Adnan I'm on the highway daily.

Jeff Ferland

@RoryAlsop That map above is for you.

Simon

@DavidFreitag HIGHWAY FIVE!

facepalms

David Freitag

16:43

@Simon You mean "BROKEN ARMS 5"

Simon

wat

Adnan

@JeffFerland Oh, and Sweden. The fuckers!

ManishEarth

The Bear is in the room.

Room, acknowledge his existence please

Scott Pack

We've missed you, @JeffFerland.

Simon

HAIL BEAR

Adnan

16:44

@ScottPack +1

Scott Pack

ALL HAIL HYPNOBEAR

Stack Exchange

HAIL BEAR!!!

David Freitag

Theres a stop sign near where i live where you can literally High Five at

google.com/maps/…

Simon

wat

Adnan

Simon

16:45

He's cheating.

@DavidFreitag See you tonight!

Adnan

@DavidFreitag Feeds the link into the drone.

David Freitag

@Simon Heh, that's a few miles from my house, good luck

Stack Exchange

@Simon What? No. Who would dare cheat in front of the BEAR??!

David Freitag

lol

Jeff Ferland

@ScottPack It has been a crazy life. DEFCON, Burning Man, a recruiting trip, a spontaneous vacation to LA/San Diego (skip LA)

Simon

16:46

@DavidFreitag I'm gonna interrogate your neighborhood until I find you.

Scott Pack

@StackExchange WTH

Simon

@StackExchange SHUT UP ID -2

Adnan

@Simon Just nuke the whole area.

David Freitag

@Simon You think anyone in my neighborhood either knows me or knows what i look like? What kind of shudin do you take me for.

Jeff Ferland

... and of course, I have to work too, and run, and cycle, and motorcycle, and rock climb...

Simon

16:47

@DavidFreitag I'll find a way.

David Freitag

@Simon Bring it on, sweet cheeks.

Scott Pack

@JeffFerland Next you need a spontaneous vacation to someplace awesome. Someplace like Columbus. That's where all the cool kids weekend.

Simon

@DavidFreitag And once I find you, DJ Stephanie is next.

And you'll help me.

Scott Pack

@ManishEarth How did that guy end up on the room owners list?

ManishEarth

in The Pod Bay, 7 mins ago, by Stack Exchange

@TildalWave NO. I AM ALIVE. I AM ALWAYS LISTENING. BEWARE.

It never shuts up

Simon

16:48

We'll need some termites and that termite cannon.

@ManishEarth :(

David Freitag

@Simon I have plenty.

Simon

@DavidFreitag I knew you'd be happy.

ManishEarth

@ScottPack I put him there (it's a chatbot I occasionally run) so that I could hail the bear

David Freitag

@Simon Happy? No. the claymore i have rigged to my exterior door will be happy to see you, though.

Scott Pack

@ManishEarth Lamer.

Simon

16:51

@DavidFreitag My nickname is The French Defuser.

David Freitag

@Simon kinky..

Simon

Would I get a special mention on the InfoSec.SE site if I'd get a tattoo that says: "@ThomasPornin 4 lyfe" ?

kalina

@Adnan my relationships status is "very complicated"

and... none of your business

Simon

Dayum, he got told.

So basically, you changed your status on FB to "it's complicated", right?

kalina

You go girl fingersnap

I don't have a bookface profile

or a myspas profile

or a faceparty profile

Adnan

16:57

@kalina All right, sub-20er.

kalina

or a friendster profile

or a bebo profile

or a profile with your mother

Scott Pack

Clearly you must have a Google+ account. How can you not these days?

kalina

well

Adnan

@Simon Being a relation ship is great.

kalina

I have a google+ account because it is forced down my throat

Adnan

16:58

@Simon Now ask me a question about it, please. Anything.

kalina

it is blank with nothing on it though

Scott Pack

Simon

@Adnan How's your relation ship?

Adnan

@Simon FUCK YOU! It's none of your business!

Simon

LOL

kalina

16:59

All I'm going to reveal about myself today

Adnan

@Simon Oh, did I sound like an idiotic and ridiculous teenager?

kalina

is OMGILOVESOURSKITTLESSOMUCHOMNOMNOMNOM

Scott Pack

@Adnan Usually.

kalina

are you implying I'm idiotic or ridiculous?

ManishEarth

@Adnan Nah, you didn't get it quite right

Scott Pack

17:00

Goddammit now I want Skittles.

Simon

@Adnan I guess I still laugh at teenager stuff.

Wow. I actually want a coffee.

ManishEarth

I have better stuff. Chocolate chip cookies!!!

Simon

BRB.

Adnan

@ManishEarth I envy you.

kalina

chocolate chip cookies, while being quite awesome, are not as amazing as sour skittles

Scott Pack

17:01

I wonder if I have enough butter to make cookies.

Simon

@ScottPack You're working!

ManishEarth

@kalina well, sour skittles last longer, so if you factor that in, maybe

David Freitag

@ScottPack Too bad you're at work :|

ManishEarth

Otherwise no. Chocolate cookeis are da bomb

kalina

I duno, you've not seen me munching sour skittles

they don't seem to last all that long

Scott Pack

17:02

@DavidFreitag Define "at work".

ManishEarth

I munch at a speed depending on how much I have left

If I have a whole packet, I more or less inhale 'em

Jeff Ferland

@ScottPack I swear there's a 500 mile bubble around there known as "no reasonable destinations"

David Freitag

@ScottPack Sitting on the couch with your macbook, of course of course.

ManishEarth

when I have ten left, I chew each one slowly and tell myself that I'm savoring the taste

kalina

when I'm working at home, I work from bed

it saves getting dressed

or doing my hair

or... well, loads of things

David Freitag

17:03

Or painting your face

kalina

oh I'm not a subscriber of the face painting club

Scott Pack

@JeffFerland We got the best zoo in the country.

kalina

I have white pillows

Jeff Ferland

@ScottPack You have no direct flights :(

Scott Pack

@JeffFerland Seriously?

@JeffFerland That does suck. Though I never fly out of Port Columbus, I always go through Rickenbacker.

@JeffFerland I can get direct flights down to my folks in Florida for fairly cheap without having to deal with the annoyances of big airports.

Simon

17:05

@kalina Are you depressed?

kalina

@Simon nope

I am naturally euphoric, tempered by my overwhelming marijuana usage

Simon

Drugs are good for you.

David Freitag

The best thing for you is to fill your pockets with acid tabs and jump into a local swimming pool.

Simon

@DavidFreitag You're fucked up.

kalina

not a huge fan of swimming, joint gets wet

Rory Alsop

17:07

@Jefff- awesome map. Will download and keep

David Freitag

@Simon I didn't say i had to be full of people, although that would make for an awesome party.

Scott Pack

@kalina Keep your head out of the water.

Rory Alsop

also @Simon - you want to get that sorted - mine redlines at 7.2k and has 6 gears :-)

Simon

@RoryAlsop PISS OFF!!!!!

Haha.

Rory Alsop

lol

Simon

17:08

I'm so mad that I don't have a 6th gear!

David Freitag

What car did you get?

Rory Alsop

Just got to the airport lounge in Amsterdam, so now have nothing to do but mess around on t'internet for the next couple of hours

Scott Pack

@Simon From what I hear @RoryA's goes to 11.

Simon

@DavidFreitag 2.5 RS

Rory Alsop

but not in binary...

David Freitag

17:09

@Simon Ehrm, wat?

Rory Alsop

He means a Subaru

David Freitag

Ohrite i remember now, the one that was burning oil.

Simon

Yeah.

Rory Alsop

Related - just - have you seen the video or listened to the song "A horse outside", @Simon - interesting mention of Subarus (NSFW)

Simon

With a good oil it burns way less.

@RoryAlsop Ooo no I haven't!

Rory Alsop

17:10

it's not hardstyle, sorry

David Freitag

@Simon One would hope none at all, but oh well..

Rory Alsop

but it is comedy

Simon

@DavidFreitag Well, especially for a boxster engine, it's fairly normal to burn oil at high mileage.

Haha, Civic VS Subaru.

David Freitag

@Simon That's why i bought mine with 36 miles on it.

Simon

@DavidFreitag Well yeah, that's the smart thing to do when you have the money for it.

I paid 4k for mine and it's in a damn good shape for that price.

Especially when you keep in mind the demand for those cars.

David Freitag

17:13

@Simon I just barely have the money for it as it turns out. I have to ask for a substantial raise at the end of this year

Simon

@DavidFreitag Aw =\

I like how the song is about 3 Japanese brands.

David Freitag

Well, i barely have enough money to pay for the car, then go out and drink with my friends and the occasional party i should say.

Jeff Ferland

@ScottPack Yeah, I can get to Milan from here, but I can't get to Columbus, or any airport within 100 miles, from any of the 3 nearby airports.

Simon

@DavidFreitag It sucks to be a student.

David Freitag

@Simon Yeah, a student who doesn't pay a cent of tuition.

Simon

17:15

@DavidFreitag I'm in the same situation, life's hard bro.

David Freitag

Almost unbearable.

Rory Alsop

@Simon - japanese cars are huge sellers here (and in Ireland)

Simon

I cry for 30 mins every night before I finally fall asleep.

Rory Alsop

cheap, powerful, fast

Simon

@RoryAlsop Good, they're my favorites :P

David Freitag

17:16

@Simon No, that's because of the body in your basement.

Simon

@DavidFreitag It smells so bad man...

David Freitag

@Simon Lye

Or HF + PVC container.

Simon

#yoloswag

Is that a normal thing to do for a married couple to have a list of popular people that you are allowed to sleep with?

It's not the first time that I hear about that.

David Freitag

uhh...?

Sleep with, or sleep with?

Simon

Do I wanna say vulgarly or cleanly, humm.

Hang on.

To fuck with.

David Freitag

17:20

Clean.

Simon

I went for the first option.

David Freitag

Obey teh @AviD!

Simon

Alright, it was quite clean.

David Freitag

I'd rather not get spanked. Especially by tigger.

Simon

^ cc @RoryAlsop @ScottPack @AviD possibly @TildalWave?

That question over there.

Who else is married here?

David Freitag

17:22

Aren't both the rories married?

Scott Pack

@Simon Mrr?

Simon

I don't know, it's hard to remember facts for 2 rories.

@ScottPack Read the question like 10 lines ago.

David Freitag

You should have just pinged them both.

Scott Pack

Oh, uh, I can't necessarily say I've known of anyone doing that.

I hear about it on TV, but that's it.

Simon

Yeah.

David Freitag

17:23

Seems pretty ridiculous.

Scott Pack

In college I knew some people with open relationships, but that's not quite the same thing.

Simon

That's even more fucked up.

I would NEVER be able to do that.

Scott Pack

Neither I.

David Freitag

Third'd

Simon

@ScottPack LOL

David Freitag

17:25

nice

Rory Alsop

@Simon - yes. Perfectly normal. Kylie Minogue and Jodie Foster are on my list. SWMBO has Vin Diesel and Dave Grohl on hers :-)

Simon

@RoryAlsop Are you serious????

Hahahaha

Scott Pack

Kylie Minogue? Seriously?

Rory Alsop

actually Danni and Kylie - as a pair

David Freitag

@RoryAlsop Jodie Foster? Seriously?

Rory Alsop

17:26

:-)

Oh yes - Jodie. For about thelast 30 years she's been on my list

Scott Pack

Wow. Jodie Foster is short.

Simon

@ScottPack I like how you removed that post :D

David Freitag

Ah, i forgot, you had a chance to see her born.

Rory Alsop

@David - I read that b as an h. Confused me a bit...

Scott Pack

heh

David Freitag

17:28

@RoryAlsop Stop drinking in the airport, man!

Rory Alsop

The list wasn't supposed to be likely was it? In fact probably best that it isn't

although I guess theres reasonable odds of me meeting Dave Grohl...

@David - not drinking. Have to drive at the other end

David Freitag

Bummer.

Scott Pack

@RoryAlsop So you're only drinking on the flight?

Rory Alsop

I have a huge pizza to eat though

David Freitag

lucky...

Rory Alsop

17:29

I like airport lounge table service

David Freitag

You are also probably small enough to comfortably fit in airplane seats. Damn things are hideously uncomfortable for me.

Simon

@DavidFreitag Define small.

David Freitag

About your size.

Simon

QQ

David Freitag

Maybe taller.

Scott Pack

17:30

So 3-4 inches?

Nice.

David Freitag

Heh, nice one.

Simon

Are you talking about my wiener?

My poor George.

David Freitag

@Simon Leave your dog out of this.

Simon

@DavidFreitag No... Wait, it's probably better if you think that I'm talking about my non-existent dog.

Rory Alsop

@David - no. All aeroplane seats are too small - well, I quite like decent business class and first, but all other seats suck

David Freitag

17:33

@RoryAlsop Ah, bummer. The only seats i can even remotely get comfortable in (other than business or 1st) is the seats just behind the wall. 6'2 needs the legroom :|

Simon

Sometimes, it's nice to be short.

Like when some giant dude wants to kick your ass, you can simply crawl under his legs.

David Freitag

@Simon I can see how offering favors of a sexual nature would stop someone from wanting to fight you.

Scott Pack

@Simon Or, if you're @JeffFerland, you can just walk under them.

Simon

@DavidFreitag That's how I roll, baby.

@ScottPack Is he that short?

Scott Pack

@RoryAlsop I think my favorite flight has to have been Chicago to Heathrow on BA business class. That was pretty epic.

Rory Alsop

17:36

Yup - always go for the upgrades

Scott Pack

Free Gin and Tonic in a real glass. Oh baby.

Rory Alsop

I was very comfy on my last flight out to India - business class all the way with BA. They serve a nice champagne too

David Freitag

Never been in anything other than the back of the damn plane. We always flew standby for vacations.

Simon

Never been... in a plane.

FML.

I was planing to keep my money to do to the Netherlands but I spent it all on a car.

So yup, let's wait a few years.

I mean, I could probably go to Cuba or something like that but dunno.

David Freitag

We got stuck in the bahamas for a month because there were no standby flights out. That was quite fun :]

Scott Pack

17:38

We usually fly down to Florida to visit my folks. 18 hours in a car sounds like a terrible idea.

Rory Alsop

wow. I think growing up with a pilot as a father spoiled me a bit - I got to fly from about the age of 4 (not take off or land, as I couldn't se over the dash very well)

Scott Pack

Hey, anyone used Nessus to scan ESXi? /cc @RoryMcCune

Rory Alsop

and by fly, I mean control the aircraft while he served coffee or read the paper :-)

Simon

@ScottPack What does it scan it for, vulnerabilities?

@RoryAlsop Haha.

Rory Alsop

@Simon - **get out**
"What does nessus scan for?"
In the DMZ?

Simon

17:40

I never used any scanner :(

And I'm curious about the stability/security of ESX.

Scott Pack

Allegedly it's supported, and I get credentialed results, but I can't get it to actually tell me what patches are missing

Simon

157

Q: Write a program to find 100 largest numbers out of an array of 1 billion numbers

I recently attended an interview where in a question was asked "write a program to find 100 largest numbers out of an array of 1 billion numbers." I was only able to give a Brute Force solution which was to sort the array in O(nlogn) time complexity and take the last 100 numbers. Arrays.sort(a...

Nice interviewer.

Xander

@Simon Why do you say that?

Simon

17:56

@Xander I'm being sarcastic, it sounds like a shitty question to be asked.

But I guess it's quite effective though.

Thomas Pornin

@Simon In my previous job, when we were conducting interviews for wannabe developers, we had a fiendishly cunning task, which was: write a program which sorts an array of integers in ascending order (in C or Java, at candidate choice).

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