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Tony Meyer
Tony Meyer
4:47 AM
@NeilFein reads pretty well to me. I wouldn't cut much - you're covering a large story, so there's much to be said. The synopses do seem a tad long, although I'm not sure what I would cut.
For "All over the world", you're introducing the story, so probably can't cut much there. I think "The Fourth Man" could handle the most cutting.
I wouldn't cut "Spacetime Archaeology" much, because the point (going by the title) is re-evaluating the end, and that's where you do this. Somewhat ironically, the conclusion feels a bit short (rushed ;)) to me - maybe a sentence or two more about how it didn't work or what you would have liked?
 
Neil Fein
Neil Fein
5:44 AM
@TonyMeyer - Yeah, I think you're right. Will revisit the piece and submit it. Thanks!
 
Neil Fein
Neil Fein
6:13 AM
@TonyMeyer - Done, I smoothed over the pacing a bit, condensed the reviews of the earlier books and expanded the last, adding more references to how time has changed my perception of the books. I think it's a better article now, and I submitted it for review. It would be nice if it had pictures, though. Anyone here know how to do inline pictures, so the text flows around them?
 

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