It has been brought to my attention that I am not exactly taking care of myself (mentally) as well as I should; due to the fact that I spend too much time and effort doing other things

@BardicWizard and that is the definition of productive :D

@BardicWizard I'll see that and raise you "This won't be on the exam, but it's fun to learn it" - is on the exam.

@Ben go on

My week consists of Monday/Wednesday alternating DnD nights, Tuesday game night, wednesday (on the week off) I hang out and go for walks with friends, friday night is a game night with family, Saturday and sundays are spent with my partner and her kids, and also Archery every fortnight on sundays as well.

@Ben wow

Well it sounds like you've got a lot of leisure time activities, usually that's more good than bad, but are you feeling overwhelmed by the amount of activities you have?

I thought that since most of this is just "low stress", fun, hanging out with people, it isn't an issue. But I've been told that this is actually a huge load, and I am coming around to think the same.

@Ben Whoa! That's a lot of activities.

@AncientSwordRage I’ll raise you a “if I say it in class it will be on the test”

That's a packed schedule

I rarely get any time to myself, sine I also work 8-5 every monday to friday, and then what's left of sundays is spent doing chores

@Ben a commitment is a commitment, which brings its own stresses around those activities, even if it's not the case during them

I don't think you should really pay much attention to what others say unless it's someone whose opinion matters (eg. a spouse) or someone who is trained to recognize unhealthy behavior patterns like a psychologist. Do you feel like it's bothering you that your schedule is packed, personally? Does the level of activity and lack of unplanned free time cause you stress?

Don't get me wrong, I love doing it all. And I do feel obligated to most of them as I'd feel if I weren't there, then the event would fall through (not that it hinges on me, it's just a numbers thing)

And because your schedule is packed, you can always be stressing about the next activity during the current one.

@Ben I've definitely been there during university

I'm personally one of those people who needs to have at least a couple of nights free every week or get stressed, but that's something that varies a lot person-to-person

@kviiri My mother was the first person to mention it

@Ben well, it's worth at least considering I guess, @kviiri is right that it varies person-to-person so it might not be the case

And I do feel like I wish I had more time to myself, to do more writing, or playing video games (i.e. mindless activity)

That's relatable ^^

And I'm even coming around to the idea of going for walks more regularly

You can always give it a trial run

What's important is that you don't let any... er, I don't know how to frame them, but outsider-imposed preconceptions mess up with your perception of the value of time

@AncientSwordRage That is hitting the nail on the head a bit. I worry about what happens if I don't go; how people would feel, would the night be as good with less people, etc.

It's all too easy to get hung up in thought patterns like "well of course I should do X instead of Y" even if one really wants or needs Y more.

And I have been thinking about talking to my partner about her idea of spending time with me. We hang out every two or three days, and I'm on the verge of moving in with her, after a few trial months of spending a week per month with her.

I think she has the idea that she wants to spend time with me alone outside of all the other activities, which sometimes don;t end until 11pm

Heh. I've kinda been there, or rather, on the receiving end

Not to misconstrue the value or importance of it, but I think that might be the mouse that sinks the boat

Which, ironically is the point of that story. Lol

Well that has been very helpful - definitely confirmed a lot of things I've been thinking about lately. Now I just need to figure out what fat to trim lol

Long story short during the last couple of years of university, my then-SO lead a very active life of studying through the evening late into the night, sleeping until midday, then resuming studying, and free time was mainly devoted to her hobbies of geocaching (which I often joined) or knitting while watching the telly with me. Wasn't very fulfilling life for me, although at least I had lots of time to pursue my own things

Having her schedule mainly packed was important to her at the time, by what I understood – it wasn't my cup of tea but helped her cope with the stresses of academia I guess.

Yeah, my Dad was like that when he went back to university. Purposefully didn't allow himself much time for "extracurricular"

I am very different to him by comparison

Which is why I never did any dedicated tertiary education

This discussion reminded me that I haven't been outside the house since Monday

The other question I had was reading vs writing. In the same way that the common consensus is reading is better than watching TV, which is understandable. But what about writing?

It might depend on the situation - e.g on a laptop vs in a journal.

Depends! i get lots of kicks from writing, when I feel like writing xD

But not all the time

@kviiri them feels lol

@Ben I have a hack for writing lots of fiction tho

Even then I might feel like writing, but then.... ......... .................

I just need to book the evening for some scientific writing

bam, I get distracted into writing novellas

I am writing a couple of sci-fi novellas at the moment

A lot of my productive time is procrastinating other productive tasks

And by "writing" I mean I have one or two chapters written that I wrote over 6 months ago and then never had the proper time/inspiration match-up to continue

x) I know that feeling

I'm currently going through a very rough crunch phase of trying to finally graduate. It's stressful, but also rewarding.

I'm close.

@kviiri I'm good a doing "productive" things because a lot of my week is scheduled, since I spend a lot of time (currently) doing other things I need to schedule my time to do washing, cleaning, etc

@kviiri Nice :D

Despite the workload, I'm actually quite happy and energetic at the moment, and... well. I do balance it out a bit by allowing myself a lot of pleasures too. That's why I've been to the sauna three nights in a row now

And I have ginger beer every day

And just finished my 356th pot of tea since May when I moved in here (yes I do keep count)

So my question is, would writing be considered on the same level as reading, in comparison to the "reading vs watching tv" scenario?

@kviiri Oh wow, very nice

@nitsua60 it just felt,... I dunno a little forced, defeatest, and to some degree almost lazy to me. I'm not against an attitude of acceptance of loss, but they had been given the power to change the afterlife and seemed to only brush over the surface of what truly needed to be changed IMO

@Ben Hmm, sorry to offer such a low-effort answer :D but I think it depends a lot on how writing makes you feel

@kviiri Well it doesn't seem like an easy one to answer haha. Google has been less than useless on the topic haha

For me, writing is often a form of playing

But I'm not that good with traditional narratives, I mainly write "articles" about fictional things

I agree, it depends on how much you like writing

politics of the elven kingdoms or the circumstances of the disappearance of King Badger or somesuch.

I tend to read and do fiber crafts for fun but my sibling writes for fun

@Ben I'm not saying you should, but there's value in put half finished stuff away, and starting the plan from the top. You will have learnt something from the chapters you wrote, even if you never go back to them.

Lesson courtesy of my GitHub page

I think I need to set up an environment for it to work effectively. Currently I use my laptop in bed.

I think I need to instead set up a desk in more of an "office" environment, to separate the whole "active" from "rest" environments

@AncientSwordRage There's a particular short story I've written at least twenty times

Experimenting with different ideas and such

...but now

I should experiment with the idea of going to sleep before it's two AM again

@kviiri that sounds like a good idea

@Ben that's a hugely beneficial shift

@kviiri That sounds like a solid plan. Thanks for your input!

@AncientSwordRage Yeah. The main reason I haven't is comfort haha. I do have a space I can set that up, but the light is overpowering, it's hot and uncomfortable, so it just takes away from the enjoyment of the activity

@Ben thats why i use a different room for school!

@AncientSwordRage accurate

@BardicWizard haha

@Ben my wife cleared a space for an office, but it ended up being so nice she took.it over 😅

@Ben can you get blinds and/or a fan?

@AncientSwordRage It's outside in North Queensland haha

It's on the patio, and it has a screen wall that does keep the bugs out. The issue is that the fan has a light on it that heats up and ends up just blowing hot air around lol

And it's in a location that airflow is either overpowering or non existent

Oh dear

So while it's productive to have that area, the environment it's in leaves something to be desired.

Hmmmm, suns line more faff than its worth

Once I move I think I'll be able to set up a more desirable environment for it.

@Ben Just put your desk next to your bed, that way you can work while you sleep and save time during the day

@MikeQ Lol I wish

Well thankyou all for the input :D It's been helpful and I reckon I'll be able to figure out what I need to do in order to organise my time better

@Ben good luck!

Currently listening to an audiobook called "The subtle art of not giving a f*ck". And in all honesty this really hits home with everything I'm dealing with.

Here's a summary

@Ben Pretty sure that was a bestselling novel a few years ago. I think there is a sequel as well.

I can definitely believe that :D

I literally just started listening to it and it's really hitting home in a good way.

I'm already thinking about suggesting it to some other people who might benefit from it

@linksassin How's it going?

@Ben Busy, tired. I was up very late last night doing some work I couldn't get done earlier in the week due to bad internet connection. Which you might be able to tell if you look at the chat history.

@linksassin No good :( it's amazing how much of an effect not having an internet connection has on us these days