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12:04 PM
morning
awfully quiet weekend
 
gbn
12:26 PM
Hello
We're having winter this week.
quiet times too
 
 
2 hours later…
2:43 PM
people are lurking but crickets everywhere
 
Need to get some lizards, they'll gobble up the crickets in no time
 
I'm over winter and snow. Had to snowblow 2x in 6 hours.
 
My code doesn't work, but I'm not going to provide you working code to actually test with
-3
Q: Split cell contents to multiple rows

w0051977Please see the data below: CREATE table tb_disposals(id int identity not null, user_crimenumber varchar(2000), primary key (id)) INSERT INTO tbDisposals user_crimenumber ("1; 4; 8; 9; 11") INSERT INTO tbDisposals user_crimenumber ("2; 5; 10") INSERT INTO tbDisposals user_crimenumber ("18; 42; 4...

 
That's odd. That guys has almost 3k rep, you would think he/she'd be familiar
 
3:07 PM
2.5 hours
0
Q: SQL query suddenly slowed to a crawl

MattDionisI'm running a query on SQL Server based on a view. This view's main data source is a table with close to 50 million rows of data. For weeks I've been running the query in question and it's been completing in about 20 minutes. I tried running it recently and it is unusable. It takes more than 2.5 ...

 
3:27 PM
@ypercube two sql saturdays, one of which pulled a rather large crowd
 
@swasheck Wasn't SQL Cruise last week too? Or this week?
 
oh yeah, that too
 
and SQL Fridays in London
2
 
3:58 PM
@gbn Howdy. Long time no see
 
is this really an answer?
-1
A: SQL query suddenly slowed to a crawl

HLGEMOne thing to look at when something is suddenly slower is out-of-date statistics.

 
she expanded it
 
gbn
@ConcernedOfTunbridgeWells yeah, sorry
 
@gbn Never mind. How's life in Malta?
 
gbn
don't seem to have the time to keep up
cold right now
Our week or 2 of winter
 
4:07 PM
@gbn what's cold there?
 
gbn
it's about 10 degrees
 
@gbn New SO and all. How long have you been an item now?
At least 2012 IIRC.
 
@Lamak still seems like a comment
 
i'll agree that it seems like a comment.
 
I'll agree with @swasheck
(didn't want to agree with @Kermit)
 
4:23 PM
watching a WebEx from a vendor - they're storing user passwords encrypted in the database (instead of the hash), and with no salt. The say nothing can read the password except the application. Riiiiiiight.
 
@Lamak XOXO
 
@MaxVernon which vendor
 
@swasheck not telling lol
 
Similar to the .NET guys telling me there are no performance issues with using EF.
 
@swasheck security through obscurity
@KrisGruttemeyer LOL. I love that; I bet they say something like "it's performant" as well.
2
Q: Is there a word/phrase for "unperformant"?

void.pointerAs a software engineer, I need to sometimes describe a piece of code as something that lacks performance or was not written with performance in mind. Example: This kind of coding style leads to unmaintainable and unperformant code. Based on my Google searches, this isn't a real word. What ...

 
4:28 PM
@MaxVernon Don't you know it... Ironically, we have a meeting at 1pm to discuss tuning and performance issues. I don't know what I should even do. Go with the flow and learn more about it? Keep kicking and screaming about all the secutiry, performance and manageability issues?
 
@KrisGruttemeyer sounds like way tooooo much fun.
better you than me.
 
gbn
@ConcernedOfTunbridgeWells Jul 2012
we'd just met when you came over
 
I broke it down simply, use SPs and I (one man DBA team) get the call at 3am and can track, troubleshoot and fix performance issues. Or, the .NET team can go forward with EF and THEY get the call at 3am, THEY will have to find the performance problem, fix it, recompile and redeploy........ to. the. entire. company.
 
gbn
married 3 months and a bit now. She hasn;t changed a bit...
 
@KrisGruttemeyer excellent. what did they say?
 
4:32 PM
@MaxVernon Well, we want to keep using it. Also brought up that it only takes one smartarse in the field that googled SQL injection to figure out how to punch giant holes in our DB security
I'm going to have to pick my battles carefully with this topic
 
@KrisGruttemeyer of course they want to keep using it. That way the devs don't have to work with that nasty database stuff. Am I bitter? No.
 
@MaxVernon Not bitter at all! HA. I'm just going to have to keep fighting it, professionally. can't be that whiny DBA who just hates everything but I really think I have some VERY good sticking points. Unfortunately, like my 11 month old daughter, I may have to let them fall on their own so they learn that it hurts and they should be careful
 
@KrisGruttemeyer excellent. Sounds like you're an asset to that place.
 
@gbn Well done. Congratulations.
 
@MaxVernon I certainly hope so! I LOVE this job. Ever since I became an accidental DBA, it's just been an addiction, haha.
 
4:38 PM
@KrisGruttemeyer I certainly find it a fulfilling occupation!
 
room topic changed to The Heap™ - Consultancy ©®: General on- and off-site discussion for dba.stackexchange.com [aaron-is-a-dad-again!] [gbn-just-got-married] [lamak-for-cm] [mysql] [nosql] [not-too-many-vertica-folk] [oracle] [postgresql] [sql-server]
 
kejser soze
 
5:32 PM
@swasheck Söze is a data lord whose ruthlessness and influence have acquired a legendary, even mythical status among DBAs and devs alike.
 
man. fkuc XE pre 2012
 
@swasheck indeed
trace deprecation will take some time.
 
especially when you only put half of your ass into creating its replacement
 
v1 is like v1 of a lot of other things - columnstore, hekaton, etc.
 
ok. fair enough.
 
5:36 PM
In fairness, it's a tough balance. Imagine if they held up 2008 for the completion of XEvents
 
@AaronBertrand yeah - that would have been crazy.
 
Not defending it, but we are a fickle bunch of customers. We want frequent releases with lots of small and big features. But big features take longer to develop than how long we're willing to wait.
And it's not because Microsoft doesn't want to bolster staff to get features done. It's that there are only so many people who can work on a feature and are either good enough or aren't simply contributing diminishing returns.
How many Conor Cunninghams do you think there are in the world? Do you want anyone not as smart as him in charge of optimizer changes? I don't. :-)
 
i know. and yes, we are very fickle. VERY fickle. i actually dont expect much from XE pre-2012 ... except when it makes my life difficult. the natural resolution is ... upgrade :)
@AaronBertrand he's got a great combination of smart and no-nonsense
 
We have a common friend who would do great things for SQL Server. But I don't know if he would ever go there. And I think I learn more about the optimizer because he doesn't work there than I would if he did. :-)
 
5:41 PM
indeed. that person gets to share more out of the fruits of curiosity (over which an NDA has limited jurisdiction)
@MaxVernon frickin' hilarious
 
@swasheck indeed!
 
@AaronBertrand though i'm not sure i've earned actual "friend" status with said person. :)
 
I want to add 2 dates together
0
Q: Sum time of two datetime2 columns?

jfishbowI have a table with two datetime2 columns which I want to add the time it took from callstartdt to callenddt. I have tried something like this select DATEADD(minute, callstartdt, callenddt) as summing from Detail where SeqNum = 87 but I always end up with a error like Argument data ...

 
how do you even add dates?
 
@bluefeet so, Monday + Tuesday = Wednesday!
 
5:46 PM
exactly
 
what's 2014-01-01 + 2019-03-27?
 
@swasheck #Undefined
lol:
@max_vernon Science is ready- Are you? Pls Donate to the cure for Herpes @ Duke University labs. Have a heart, bro :) http://cullenlab.duhs.duke.edu/faq/
This person I do not follow, and have never heard of!
 
@MaxVernon bro, have a heart
 
@bluefeet I know!
 
@MaxVernon are you ready for herpes?
 
5:52 PM
@swasheck so funny on so many levels!
 
(@MaxVernon apparently contracted herpes at sql sat winnie)
 
wondering whether to reply to his tweet, or just ask Twitter to send him to /dev/nul
 
flag as offensive/spam/@billinkc
 
dammit, I don't see a choice for @billinkc
 
6:10 PM
@swasheck so how was SQL Sat ABQ?
 
@mmarie pretty good. jason horner said i was boring and i'd put people to sleep in his presentation
 
?
 
in his presentation he said people should go to mine but that i might put them to sleep because i give a lot of detail
 
@swasheck I don't know him
 
@swasheck That sounds like a compliment
 
6:24 PM
@JamesLupolt it was. it was good-natured ribbing
 
Jason is always ribbed for pleasure
Now I need to go find some mind bleach
 
6:44 PM
Here, think about giant Ferrero Rocher candies instead
 
roaches?
 
7:00 PM
Free downvotes
-1
A: How to use HTTP Connection Manager in Script Component? (Not Script Task)

RamPRINT N' EXECUTE MyDatabase.dbo.sp_addsubscription @publication = N''MyPublication'', @subscriber = ''' + CAST(SERVERPROPERTY('ServerName') AS SYSNAME) + ''', @destination_db = ''SubscriberDatabase'', @subscription_type = N''Push'', @sync_type = N''automatic'', @article = N''all'', ...

(free downvotes might result in loss of reputation)
 
Or, DELETED
 
@MaxVernon Just had the EF performance tuning meeting. Very calm, cool, collected. Focused on how we're all on the same team and I want to help. Met with some pretty palpable hostility and got a 'I don't buy that excuse' when I pointed out that EF code is challenging and difficult to interpret if you're trying to find out 'what that code does'
 
@KrisGruttemeyer to answer that, I think I'd print out an EF sample, and compare that to one you'd write that provides the same result set. Then let them tell you which one is easier to understand.
2
 
Or just show them the EF version first, and ask them to describe what it does.
 
@Max I was about to say exactly the same
 
7:07 PM
Or ask someone in the room who doesn't code in EF to try to decipher both code samples.
 
@AaronBertrand lol. Agreed, that should be very instructive!
 
@MaxVernon That's what I'm in the process of doing right now. I almost just asked him to tell me exactly what his code does.
 
and if there is any objection, then provide the 2 execution plans.
 
This is the first time I have had to really focus on diplomacy and professionalism since I became a DBA.
 
that sounds like something i should try
 
7:20 PM
It was very difficult. I don't take directed hostility or minimization of legitimate concerns about our environment very well. I'm trying to look out for the greater good and down the road, not just what's directly in front of me at this very moment.
 
@KrisGruttemeyer time how long it takes you to determine what the EF code actually does, and include that in your presentation
 
@MaxVernon Absolutely. Just translating this mess is a huge pain. It's fairly complex, will easily take me til the end of the day so I'm doing it in 1 hour chunks. I also have to write the same thing, in regular t-sql for comparison and time that.
 
7:34 PM
@AaronBertrand subban fined 2k for diving :)
 
post an answer ^^
because the current answer is terrible
 
but...but....laziness
 
but you already wrote one in the comment
 
yeah, you are right. I'll write an answer
 
I don't even know where to start
0
Q: Syntax error in EXEC(@sql) in stored procedure

trscI'm coding a sp to use in an asp.net page which displays a gridview (with multiple pages) and checkboxes for the select query. However it gives me syntax error on the EXEC(@sql), can't I call it within the if after using the WITH...AS ? SET @sql=@sql +' ' +' FROM DATASET WHERE (RowId BETWEEN (@p...

 
7:41 PM
that's like a who's who of WTF
 
@bluefeet I posted it as an answer now
 
thx +1 from me
 
But you are right, I should've posted it instead of commenting.
 
@Lamak you could move the C.Id = @ClientId inside the derived table.
(Probably more efficient)
 
@ypercube you are right, I'll edit my answer
 
7:44 PM
Do I just reply "no"?
@onlybluefeet Please Help me Bro................
 
@bluefeet just block the user
i just reported as annoying :)
 
nice
 
@bluefeet i heard sqlsat phoenix is going to have like 12 tracks
 
@bluefeet I think I'm missing some context
 
thinking of submitting next year
 
7:47 PM
@Lamak SO user emailed me after I deleted their question
 
ah, annoying
 
this is likely to be a fairly dumb question. How can I get SSMS to display like this:
the Results and messages tabs are beside the Editor tab instead of the typical separate pane below the Editor.
 
Tools > Options > Query Results > SQL Server > Results to Grid > check "Display results in a separate tab"
Same for results to text
And the results to text sheet actually also has "Display status messages in a separate tab"
 
@MaxVernon once you get it, you mash F6 and you never go back
 
7:57 PM
nice
 
8:08 PM
I wonder where this was posted and got 2.4K views in one day: dba.stackexchange.com/questions/91388/…
 
@ypercube it was tweeted
DELETE command not completing on 30,000,000 row table http://dba.stackexchange.com/q/91388?atw=1 #mysql
I'm guessing the #mysql drove traffic to it
 
> _WA_Sys_00000004_0798A2AC
thank you for the helpful stats names
jackwagons
(sybase, i'm looking at you)
 
8:24 PM
If you gaze long enough into the abyss, sybase will gaze back into you
 
Brent recently suggested that the WA stood for Washington, and it's how you could tell the stat was system created
I'm not sure that it's true - not sure if that naming convention pre-dated Microsoft's involvement
 
My wife and an MVP share a name, with an unusual spelling. I get so excited when my email alert pops up and I see my wife emailing me SQL Server questions. I've almost learned that the two will never be in alignment
 
Is your wife's name Hugo? That would explain a lot, actually
 
@AaronBertrand no. it pre-dated microsoft's fork, iirc.
 
@AaronBertrand Not touching that one...
 
8:38 PM
@swasheck then the theory holds less water
 
But no, Hilary
 
@billinkc oh yes, of course. I was just looking at the last one.
 
i'm glad i'm not an mvp ... it makes the award so much more meaningful for others
 
It's a recognition of what you do for the community and in no ways demonstrates technical prowess so you'd be fine
 
Trust me, you would devalue it far, far, far less than several that already do
 
8:41 PM
@AaronBertrand oh thank-you, thank-you, thank-you. That is sweeeet!
 
@billinkc i understand that --- and that's my point :)
 
And Bill is right, it is certainly not a measure of ability, but rather one of willing to share/assist
There are some MVPs who can barely spell SQL Server, never mind solve problems with it
 
9:28 PM
bloofeet, whenever you're about - does my usage of a canned bit of text about what Biml is and how they can use it, get me flagged as providing repetitive answer? stackoverflow.com/a/28419704/181965
 
let's see
 
if someone flags you as such
but it didn't generate a flag
 
and they did
 
@swasheck no comment
 
@bluefeet are you not allowed to comment on the status of my flags?
 
9:34 PM
no comment :)
moderators cannot confirm or deny anything
 
 
1 hour later…
10:36 PM
MVPs, Oracle ACE etc these days all seems to be about blogging prolifically and being a "community person"
 
10:46 PM
I have people skills!
 
10:58 PM
i don
t
 
@billinkc being a serial killer doesn't count
 
Bollocks
or bollox
 
horse-hockey
 
God bless Col Potter
 
someone has to
 
11:18 PM
That Sybase question we were talking about a while ago has an update:
6
Q: Why would Sybase not use a functional index?

Tim BI've created a functional index on a sybase table. create index acadress_codpost_lower on acadress(LOWER(l5_codpost)) I then run a complex query that uses the index. Without the index it takes 17.086 seconds. With the index it takes 0.076 seconds. I've run it from two different SQL clients an...

 
@Phil there are plenty of Microsoft MVPs who don't blog at all. And for those that do, generally, it's not the only community-driven activity they do. I have very little knowledge of the Oracle side.
 
@billinkc You mean like this guy?
 
@bluefeet this is the query I was talking about earlier: answers.sqlperformance.com/questions/2569/…
Transforming those 8 tuples is easy enough, because you can hard-code, but I am assuming the OP will want to support more than 3 charts and more than 3 data points.
 

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